Sentence of Marriage (59 page)

Her hand went absently to the place on her chest where the brooch had once hung. The worst of the pain had gone from her breasts, along with the milk, but they were still swollen and tender. She stared fixedly at the floor, thinking she could see a mark where the cradle had scratched a board.
It’s all gone, Jimmy
.
All the things you gave me. The ribbon, the brooch, and now my baby. There’s nothing left. Nothing
.

She closed her eyes to conjure Jimmy’s face. But all she could see was the face of a tiny baby, staring up at her.
I can’t see you any more, Jimmy
.
Even the pictures of you have gone
.

Amy kept her eyes closed to hold the picture of Ann before her. It was better than staring at the space a cradle had left.
I’ve never seen you smile, Ann. You might start smiling about now, I think you’re just old enough. I hope you have lots of things to smile about
.

She heard the door open. ‘Here she is,’ Sister Prescott said brightly. ‘Sitting up and all ready to go. What a good girl.’

Amy steeled herself to meet Susannah’s disapproving gaze. She opened her eyes and took one last look at the spot where the cradle had rested, then turned to face the door.

Her eyes opened wide. She sprang from her chair and launched herself at the smiling figure standing there with his arms open. ‘Pa!’ she gasped. She buried herself in her father’s arms and sobbed against his chest.

November 1884

‘I d-didn’t th-think it would be you,’ Amy sobbed. ‘I didn’t think you’d c-come and fetch me.’

‘Shh,’ Jack soothed, holding her close. ‘I missed you, so I thought why shouldn’t I come up myself? Anyway, I wanted to see you were properly looked after coming home.’

‘I’m glad,’ Amy murmured.

‘Thank you for getting her right,’ Jack said to the nurse.

‘Oh, she’s been no trouble,’ Sister Prescott said. ‘Such an easy patient! Quite a pleasure to have, really.’

‘She’s a good girl, aren’t you?’ He gave Amy a squeeze. ‘Well, there’s no need to hang around here any longer, I’ve got a cab waiting. Let’s be on our way. Where’s your luggage?’

‘Here you are,’ Sister Prescott said, handing Amy’s case to Jack.

‘Thank you. Amy, aren’t you going to thank the lady for taking care of you while you weren’t well?’

Amy turned to look at the nurse. Sister Prescott’s teeth were bared in a smile that did not reach her eyes. ‘No,’ Amy said quietly. She hid her face against her father’s chest again.

‘Amy!’ Jack sounded shocked. ‘Where are your manners?’

‘Don’t worry about it,’ Sister Prescott put in smoothly. ‘She’s overcome, seeing you again after all this time. She’s been rather homesick, poor little thing. Off you go with your father, dear.’ She saw them to the doorstep, then disappeared back inside the nursing home while Jack helped Amy down the path and into the cab.

Amy snuggled against her father in the cab, reluctant to miss a moment’s contact with him. ‘When did you get here, Pa?’

‘Just this morning.’ He pulled out his watch and checked it. ‘Less than an hour ago.’ He smiled at Amy. ‘I didn’t want to waste any time coming to see you. We’re going home on the evening sailing.’

‘You’ve just come up and you’re going straight back? Pa, you must be really tired, spending all that time on the boat.’

‘It wasn’t so bad. I came up on the
Minerva
—that’s Connolly’s sailing boat, remember? Had to sleep in the hold on a load of sacks, but it suited me to get a ride with him. It was lucky he was bringing it up this week—you know the
Staffa
doesn’t go every day, and I wanted to work it out so I could bring you straight home.’

‘I’ve been a terrible nuisance to you, haven’t I, Pa?’ Amy felt tears welling up.

‘No, you haven’t,’ Jack said briskly. ‘There’s been a bit of trouble, but it’s all coming right now. Don’t you go upsetting yourself over anything.’

‘Thank you.’ Amy squeezed his arm. ‘How’s everyone at home?’ she asked, trying to sound bright. ‘Have you seen Lizzie lately? I suppose Tommy and Georgie will have grown, I’ve been away so long.’

‘Lizzie looked after the place while your M—while
Susannah
,’ he amended, ‘was having her holiday. Lizzie’s as bossy as ever, going on about Frank whenever she gets the chance.’

Amy smiled at the picture he conjured up. ‘She must be well, then.’

‘The little fellows are good, Georgie’s talking a bit now. Tom’s been missing you.’

‘Has he? It’ll be good to see them all again. Is everyone… well, getting on all right together?’

Jack snorted. ‘Susannah wasn’t too pleased about being left at home this time.’ He flashed a wicked grin at Amy. ‘What do you think, girl? Do you reckon I’ll still have a wife when we get home?’

Amy surprised herself with a little laugh. ‘Pa, what a terrible thing to say! They’ll be all right, John will keep Harry and Susannah apart.’

‘Mmm, as long as she gets the meals on the table she’ll be all right. What do you think of the big city, anyway? All these shops and things people go on about.’

‘I don’t really know. I haven’t seen anything of Auckland.’ Amy thought for a moment. ‘Do you know, this is only the second time I’ve been outside since the day I arrived?’

‘What? In three months?’

‘Yes. Susannah took me straight to Mrs Kirkham’s, then Mrs Kirkham took me to the nursing home. And now you’ve collected me.’ She smiled at her father.

‘Well, we’ll have to do something about that.’ Jack leaned out the window and attracted the cabby’s attention. ‘Hey, you can drop us off in what-do-you-call-it, Princes Street. Near the park.’

The cabby turned down a street lined with elegant two-storied houses, and Amy peered at them through the young trees that edged the footpath. ‘That’s where the nobs live,’ Jack said. ‘Rich businessmen, that sort of thing. I think there’re a few more houses than last time I saw this place. Here we are,’ he said as the cab drew to a halt.

He helped Amy to the ground. When Amy saw him fiddling for money, she remembered her own little store. ‘I’ve got ten shillings!’ she announced. She opened her case and fished the note from a corner. ‘It’s left over from the money Susannah gave Mrs Kirkham.’

‘Humph! That was lucky—if Susannah had got it, it would have been spent by now.’

‘Oh, it’s pretty,’ Amy exclaimed, looking around at the flower beds and tree-studded lawns that spread before her. ‘Look at all these lovely flowers.’

‘Mmm. Looks even better since they got rid of the old barracks that used to be here. Let’s take a stroll.’ He held out his arm, and Amy linked her own through it. They had not gone far before she was short of breath.

‘I’m sorry, Pa, I have to stop,’ she said, leaning more heavily against him.

‘What’s wrong? Don’t you feel well?’

‘I don’t feel sick, but I’m really tired. I don’t seem to have any strength since…’

‘You’ve been ill, so it’s no wonder. You’ll have to take it easy for a while. Come on, we can sit down.’ He led her to a bench, and Amy sank on to it gratefully.

They sat in companionable silence for some time, looking around them. On this weekday morning there were few other people in the park. Men dressed for business hurried past, perhaps on their way to meetings, and pairs of middle-aged women strolled along the paths.

Amy enjoyed watching the people until she saw a young woman walking towards them, pushing a baby carriage of cane with a fringed awning. Amy turned away and stared at the fountain, but the woman stopped at their bench and sat down beside them. Amy’s eyes were drawn irresistibly towards the baby carriage. She peeped into it and saw a baby of about six months old, with a mop of dark hair, chortling and waving its arms at its mother.

That’s what you might look like in a few months, Ann. I wish you were coming home with me and Pa
. She choked back a sob and looked away from the baby. When she met her father’s eyes she saw concern there. ‘Can we go somewhere else now, please?’ she asked. ‘I’m getting a bit hot in the sun.’

Jack nodded. ‘I’ve had enough, too.’ He helped Amy to her feet, and she looped her arm through his again. ‘It brings back a few memories, this place,’ he said. He gave a snort. ‘Silly reason to come here, though.’

‘What memories, Pa?’ Amy asked, glad of the distraction.

‘Oh, I brought Susannah here a few times when we were courting. Not that we courted for long. But she liked walking around here on my arm, and I enjoyed showing her off. She was a fine-looking woman—still is, come to that. This is the place for couples to wander around showing themselves off. Especially on a Sunday.’

‘Is it? What’s this park called?’ Amy asked, already sure of the answer.

‘It’s Albert Park.’

Amy was silent for a few moments. ‘Oh. I’ve heard of Albert Park.’
So this is where you were going to take me walking, Jimmy. After we were married. Did you ever mean anything you said to me?

Tears filled her eyes, and she would have stumbled on the steep path if her father had not taken her arm more tightly. ‘You all right, girl? Not feeling faint or anything?’

‘I… I’m very hot,’ Amy said, aware of the sun beating down on her dark cloak.

Jack’s hand brushed her forehead. ‘You feel hotter than you should, and you’re sweating a bit. No wonder, that great big woollen cloak over a heavy dress like that. Here, I’ll help you off with it. I can carry it for you.’

‘No!’ Amy pulled the cloak around her more closely.

‘Why not? You don’t really want it on, do you?’

Amy looked around at the passers by, then stood on tiptoe to whisper into her father’s ear. ‘I’m scared people will stare at me, because my dress is so baggy.’

‘Is it that bad?’ Jack asked. Amy nodded. ‘And you haven’t got any others with you?’

‘One other, but it’s just as bad.’

Jack fumbled in his jacket pocket. ‘Do you want me to buy you another one? I’ve brought a bit of cash with me, I could run to a plain sort of dress.’

‘No, you mustn’t do that. Don’t worry, Pa, I’ll be all right. I’ll just keep my cloak on and stay out of the sun.’

‘I don’t know, girl, your colour’s pretty high. I don’t want you fainting.’

‘I won’t faint,’ Amy assured him, then wondered if perhaps she just might. As the sun mounted, the day was getting hotter and hotter. ‘Maybe… maybe if you could buy me a sash? Then this dress wouldn’t look so awful.’

‘All right, I’ll take you to Milne and Choyce—Susannah’s always going on about what a wonderful place it is. She must have just about bought their stock out when she came up with you, but I expect they still run to a girl’s sash.’

It was a downhill walk from the park to where Wellesley Street met Queen Street, but even so Amy had to lean heavily on her father’s arm. They waited for a horse tram to pass along the dusty road before they could cross. Amy stared with interest at the huge carriage. Another tram crossed Queen Street and stopped at the foot of the steep hill to have a massive Clydesdale harnessed in front of the other two horses.

‘They didn’t have all these trams last time I came up here—of course it was three years ago,’ Jack remarked. ‘Watch your step,’ he warned as they stepped off the footpath. Amy stopped just in time to avoid standing in a pile of horse dung.

She sheltered against her father as they walked through the crowds milling around the busy corner, then Jack guided her through a heavy door. ‘Here we are,’ he said. ‘Now, where do you think they’d have sashes?’

Amy was lost for words as she gazed around the magical place her father had brought her to. Gas lights made the store startlingly bright, illuminating all the goods on display. Counters stretched out in every direction. Amy felt her head spinning as she tried to see a pattern in the layout of the store. ‘So many things!’ she breathed when she had her voice back at last. ‘It’s so big, how do people find anything?’

‘I expect they learn their way around—or maybe they just ask someone. Miss,’ he hailed one of the dozens of young women, all attired in dark dresses, who were standing behind counters or bustling about on messages. ‘Where can my daughter get a sash?’

‘All the way down the back of the shop, sir, on the left hand side,’ the assistant said, pointing the direction.

‘It would be,’ Jack muttered as he and Amy began to weave their way through the complicated series of aisles. Amy held on tightly to his arm, fearful of getting lost forever amongst the frenetic activity all around them.

She glanced at the counter they were passing, let go of her father’s arm and stood stock still, transfixed by what she saw. The counter was covered with babies’ clothes: little jackets, bonnets and shawls. But what had caught her eye was a tiny dress of white lawn trimmed with delicate lace. Narrow ribbon in the palest of pinks was threaded through the lace at the hem and neck edges, and the ribbon was drawn into a little bow at the front of the yoke.

Amy stared at the dress.
It’s beautiful. Beautiful enough for you, Ann. I hope the people who take you will buy you lovely things. What would you look like in a pretty dress like this instead of that horrible old flannel thing Sister Prescott put you in? I wish I could see you
.