Schasm (Schasm Series) (7 page)

Finally, he speaks. “Okay, let’s take a step back here. I know the basics of your
abilities
, and I also know that your mother makes a much bigger deal of your situation than what is needed,” he says. “And you’re right: you’ve never hurt yourself or anyone else. So I don’t see the danger in helping you find a way to control where your dreams take you.” He pulls a pen out of his jacket pocket and taps it against his leg. He’s more nervous than I would have imagined. “I can’t promise you what we try will be successful, but I’d be willing to see if I can help.”

“Wow, really?” I ask. “You’ll try to help?” I’m kind of surprised that he went for it.

He nods. “I’ll have to see if your doctor will release you into my care,” he says. “I find you intriguing, Chloe. I always have. Helping you might actually assist me in finishing up my residency here, and it’ll definitely make my remaining time at this facility a little more interesting.” He points to the three connected chairs that are attached to the wall. “Have a seat over there. I’m going to go see what I can do about getting you switched over as my case.”

My eyes glaze over with tears. No one has ever seemed so eager to help me. I don’t care if he’s just thinking of me as a research project or if he actually cares about me and wants to help. Help is help, in my mind. I’m not sure my mother will be too happy about getting rid of my current doctor, though. She’ll just have to get used to it.

I take a seat on the plastic chairs and I hear a pair of heavy shoes clicking against the floor. My mother turns the corner and rushes toward me.

Great. She found me.

“Chloe, sweetie…it’s okay.” She approaches me like I’m a skittish animal that escaped from her cage at the zoo. “I’m here to help you; you’re in a safe place now. Let’s take it easy and talk this out.”

“What? Mother, I’m not dangerous.”

She walks toward me with her arms out in front of her in a defensive pose as if I’m about to claw her eyes out. She likes to put on a show when we’re here at the institution. The doctors see a sweet, desperate woman trying to help her out-of-control daughter while she comes across as being afraid of me.

I wonder if she knows how ridiculous she looks.

I ignore her strangeness.

“Chloe, can you hear me?” She waves her hands in front of my face.

I roll my eyes at her. “Nope. I can’t. Sorry.”

I know I’ve just infuriated her, but I don’t care anymore. Before she can get another silly word out of her mouth, Dr. Greene interrupts. “Mrs. Valcourt?” he asks. “If it’s all right with you, I’d like to petition to have Chloe under my care. I think I have some strategies that might help get her situation a little more in hand.” She agrees to it.

I'm shocked.

She flashes him a smile that makes me uneasy. “Please do something with her, Dr. Greene. Her behavior is becoming more aggressive lately." She wraps her arms around her midsection, as if she’s protecting herself. "I feel like I might be in danger.” She practically whispers it.

How nice. More lies—this time with acting. They should put those brain patches on her head to get a load of the amount of squiggly lines they’d get from
her
erratic brain activity instead of mine.

“Oh?” he says sympathetically. “I’m sorry to hear that. Would you like me to have her cuffed and tranquilized?” He’s totally mocking her. And I love it.

She perks up. “Only if you think it would help…” Her tone sounds far too optimistic.

Dr. Greene furrows his eyebrows at her. “Mrs. Valcourt, please have a seat in the waiting area,” he says. No more mockery. Now he’s patronizing her.

She pulls down on the hem of her shirt. She looks distressed. Being put in her place does that to her, I guess. “Yes, of course.” She clears her throat and sweeps her bangs out of her eyes. “I’m sure I’m just agitated right now and I need to cool off.” She lets out a heavy sigh. “Chloe, I will see you in ninety minutes.” She walks away without looking back.

“Can’t wait.” I say.

Dr. Greene gestures for me to follow him into one of the offices. "Have a seat," he says.

I sit in a floral print chair; much different than the usual exam table I’m asked to sit on. Dr. Greene sits down on an oversized green leather office chair and clasps his hands together across his legs. “Okay, Chloe: I’ll ask Dr. Raven to let me take on your case. I can’t say he’ll go for it, but I’ll try…let him know it might be wise to have some new eyes on your file. Until then…let’s chat a little.”

I’m so relieved. Hopefully Dr. Raven is sick of my mother and of having to compile false reports for her. I’m sure I won’t be a huge loss for him. I’ll be happy to finally get a second opinion.

“First off,” Dr. Green begins, “let me start by saying I believe your mother may be at least part of the cause of your lapsing in and out of different realities. It's clear that she’s a little rough around the edges.”

“A little?” I ask. “She’s a nut job.” I realize I just said that to a psychologist. “Sorry. It’s true, though.”

He blinks and clears his throat. “We’ll come back to that later. I’m going to need to research a few things before your next appointment. My goal is to try to help you manage your condition, to help you get control of it.”

“Of course,” I say. It sounds like a perfect strategy.

“In the meantime, let me ask you something.” He looks over the rim of his trendy thick black reading glasses. His hand is firm around his pen, ready to write down every word I say. “In general, what are you doing when you drift into one of your alternate realties?”

My fingers fidget against my knees. “It usually happens when I’m tired or unhappy,” I say, hoping my unhappiness comes through. “That seems to be more often than not lately. But my real confusion comes from not understanding why I’m going to the places that I’m going to.”

He lets his pen drop onto his notepad. “We don’t want you to be unhappy.” He rolls his large office chair over to me. “I want to help you. Okay?”

He seems so sincere that I just have to believe him. I go into extensive detail about my recent experiences. I even tell him about Alex. He doesn’t seem surprised by any of it, and he doesn’t pry for more details. I’m thankful for that.

After talking for over an hour, I can tell he’s fascinated with my abilities. I’m guessing I just became his new favorite project.

Finally, he comes up with a plan for me. “Okay…here is your assignment for the next few days: at night, I want you to go upstairs and sit on your bed with the lights off. Concentrate on the location you’d like to visit. Try to envision it by seeing it, feeling it and smelling it. Once you are comfortable and visualizing where you want to go, close your eyes and start counting backward from twenty. Take your time and inhale a deep breath in between each number. You following me?” he asks.

“Yes,” I say, “I’m listening.”

He leans over and rests his elbows on his knees. “This is a form of self-hypnosis that might help you control where you’re going. Once you wake up, I want you to jot down some notes on a pad of paper. I’d like you to record every detail of what you see and hear within the first two minutes of your arrival. Do this every night for the next three nights. I want to see you again on Friday so we can go over your notes. Once I review them, we can go forward from there.”

“Thank you, Dr. Greene,” I say, standing up. “I know everyone thinks I’m beyond help. I appreciate you trying to work with me.”

I reach my hand out to shake his. But he places his palm on my back and escorts me out the door.

“I look forward to our session on Friday, Chloe.”

I turn around to face him. “Thank you, again.”

“Oh hey,” he says, stopping me from leaving. “Try not to let your mother get to you. I think you’re onto something.”

CHAPTER SEVEN

NIGHT ONE

THE SETTING SUN
casts shadows in my room, and I’m eager to try out the self-hypnosis that Dr. Greene recommended. I know exactly where I want to go and who I want to see.

As I close my eyes, I can already feel the sun heating my arms and giving me goose bumps. The waves are crashing against the sand, and I smell the salty ocean air mixed with a touch of coconut.

Twenty…nineteen…eighteen…seventeen…sixteen…

The refreshing breeze pins my mouth into a grin. I’m now visualizing I’m the only person within the visible horizon of the beautiful golden sand. With a deep breath, I peek through my half open eyes. I sigh, taking in the beautiful seashore of San Diego.

“Looks like you figured it out,” a voice calls from the distance.

It startles me since I didn’t expect to be greeted so soon.

“Alex," I say, grinning like an idiot. He jogs toward me. My God, he's amazing.

“I’m glad to see you figured out how to come back,” he says moving in closer. His sunglasses block his eyes. “How was your day?”

I shrug. “It was boring. I don’t do much, other than sit in my bedroom." I don't think he needs to know what I really mean by that. "I’m sure
your
day was more exciting. What did you do?” I ask.

“I surfed for most of it,” he says, combing his fingers through his shimmering wet gold hair. I guess that was a dumb question, considering he’s wearing an unzipped wetsuit and carrying a surfboard.

“Rough life you have here,” I tease. I’m trying not to stare at his bare chest, toned and dripping wet.

He notices my struggling eyes and looks down at his body, acknowledging that I've been caught. “Yeah, those waves were pretty brutal today," he jokes, removing his sunglasses from his piercing blue eyes. They’re so incredible they make the color of the ocean look dull by comparison.

“Would it be weird if I told you that I’ve been looking forward to the day we could hang out like this?” he asks. His focus drifts down to the sand. He seems embarrassed.

I met him only a couple of days ago, and yet he claims to have known me for much longer.

“I wish I had the same memories, the same anticipation.” I sense that my words strike him like a punch in the gut. I feel bad about it. "That's not to say that I wasn't looking forward to seeing you again, even if it's only been two days for me." I pinch my bottom lip between my teeth.

“Sorry…I didn't mean to freak you out,” he says in a gruff voice, moving in closer to me. His hand wraps around my arm and he pulls me down into the sand to sit next to him.

“You said you only live a couple of blocks from here, right?” I ask.

He looks over at me with one eye squinted shut to keep out the sun’s glare. “Yeah. As a matter of fact, I believe you’ve actually visited my house recently.” He chuckles a bit.

It doesn't take long for me to put two and two together. It takes even less time for me to feel a rush of heat explode through my face. “Celia is…your mother?” It all comes together. “Is that large yellow house with the incredible pool yours?”

 He nods. “Yes…and yes.” He smirks, getting a kick out of my embarrassment. "Maybe we should discuss your trespassing skills.”

I purse my lips and cock my head. “Very funny. Celia said she knew me, and that I had been there before, but I don’t recall that, either. Would you care to fill me in on the missing pieces?”

“Are you sure you want to know?”

It isn’t even a question, as far as I’m concerned. “Absolutely.”

“Okay.” He pulls in a long breath. When you and I were younger, you appeared around my pool quite a bit. You weren’t very good at trespassing then either.” He winks. “I used to talk about you to Celia all the time, and she thought it was
sooooo cute
,” he mocks the tone of her voice, “that I had an
imaginary
friend
.” He stops talking and looks me in the eyes, almost as if he’s unveiling some great mystery. “That was before she saw you for herself. When she saw you disappear for the first time, she realized that you were just like me. She was ecstatic to know I wouldn’t have to go through life alone with my
extraordinary abilities
, as she calls them.”

My mind is twisting into knots. Why don’t I remember this? Him? Her?

I press him for more. “What else?”

“You and I spent time together every day one summer until your mom took you to a special doctor. You never came to visit again after that.” He looks away from me and out into the water. I see pain in his eyes.

“I’m so sorry, Alex,” I say. My hand moves to his shoulder. It looks so small on him.

He turns to face me and takes both of my hands in his. “I waited for you day after day, but you never came back. I even went looking for you…I found you once. But when we saw each other, you didn’t recognize me.” His hands squeeze mine. “My only guess was that your doctor did something to make you forget.”

I can’t bring myself to look at the pain in his eyes—the pain that I caused and was completely unaware of. I keep my eyes focused on his knuckles. “I don’t remember any
special doctor,
either.”

He releases one of my hands and cups his hand under my chin, lifting my face to look at him. The delicious smell of sunscreen and salt waft from his skin. His scent makes me weak. “Chloe, I lost my best friend that day. I
never
forgot about you or our friendship. I just never expected it would be twelve years before I would get to talk to you again.” The pain in his voice fades as he continues talking. “When you started to reappear on this beach, I didn’t know how you would react to me making contact with you after such a long time. I didn’t even know if you would remember me.”

How could I have just forgotten about him when all I want to do is be near him?

“I would never purposely forget about you,” I say.

He nods. “I know. I tested the waters a few times and walked right by you. I even tried to get in your way on purpose, so you’d have no choice but to look at me. The only thing I accomplished was making an idiot out of myself. You
never
looked at me.” He laughs.

“I didn’t look…at
you
?” I look him up and down. “Clearly, I didn’t
see
you.”