Sati (16 page)

He was instantly awake.' Who?'

'Kathy Lion. She's a freelance writer who's lived in Gatson for the last six months. I met her next-door neighbour yesterday. The neighbour said Kathy has always wanted to be an actress. What do you think of that?'

'I think that's very interesting.'

'Interesting? Isthat all?"

'Mike, could you hold on a minute? I want to change phones.'He took two minutes. Listening on the line, I could hear the young girl swearing softly. Finally David picked up another phone and asked his darling to hang up her end. When we were finally alone, he said,' I've got to tell you what went on last night. It was fantastic. Sati had another meeting and twice the number showed up. We had people sitting all over the floor. She took tons of questions and there wasn't one she didn't have the perfect answer for. There was even this physicist in the audience. The two of them had this great rap about how quantum mechanics is closing in on describingthe ultimate reality.'

Generated by ABC Amber LIT Conv
erter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

'Dave... '

'I haven't told youthe best part. There were a lot of people present who had come the night before. A couple got up and gave testimonials of healing! One old goat said his emphysema was much better, and this ugly chick told about how the swelling in her ankles had disappeared.'

'Did Sati accept responsibility for healing the old goat and the ugly chick?'I asked.

'No. Her style is totally different from TV evangelists. She acted as though the healings were of absolutely no importance.'

'Why, then, do you think they're important?'

'Come off it, Mike. Spiritual people have to be healers iftheywant to have any kind offollowing.'

'You come off it,'I said.' Didn't you hear what I just told you? Sati wasn't born in the desert a few days ago. Her name's not really Sati. She's lied to us. She's not God. She's a fake.'

'What's the big surprise? We knew she had to be some-body. If she's aK athy or Gertrude or a Pamela, who gives a damn? As long as she thinks she's God and can play the part. That's all I care about. She's going to be big.'

'What about launching ships that might sink? Sooner or later her real identity is going to come out. Then her precious meetings won't fill up the first row.'

'That's where you're wrong,'David said.' She's never stated publicly that she's only a few days old. No one's heard that except you. And who's to say Kathy Lion couldn't have been God all along? Jesus didn't start doing weird stuff till he was thirty. Up until then he was just Joe Carpenter.'

'Dave, doesn't it strike you that there is a fundamental flaw in your whole reasoning? Satiis
not
who she says she is.'

'Has she hurt anybody?'David asked.

'In a sense, yes. She's misled them.'

"That's B.S., and you know it. People will always follow somebody. Why shouldn't they follow her? At least she doesn't steal their money or lay guilt trips on them for every time they have a horny thought. She helps people. I want to help her. If you don't want to go along, fine. Just don't ruin it for everyone else.'

I didn't respond immediately. Not for an instant did I believe David's motives were altruistic. He had money, but lots of people have money. He wanted to be a
somebody,
and if that wasn't possible, he wanted to be in charge of a
somebody.
Yet there was a certain sense to his argument, never mind the fact that it was based on a lie. Sati
did
make people happy. Was I acting so self-righteous because I knew I could no longer be one of those people?

'All right, Dave,'I said finally.

'You won't get up at her meetings and bring up that thing about her being born in the desert?'

Generated by ABC Amber LIT Conv
erter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

'I won't be going to any more of her meetings.'

'That's your decision,'David said.' They keep getting bigger and better. Tonight's meeting is at the Unity Church, not far from the bank we've been using. The church minister heard her last night and was impressed. The place seats eight hundred. And I've talked to some people at the
L.A, in Focus
programme. You know, the show that interviews folks who give L.A. its colour? They're sending someone out tomorrow to hear her.'

'Sati flat out told me she never wanted to be on TV.'

'I discussed it with her. She didn't say no.'

Suddenly, I had a splitting headache.' All right, whatever you say. I've got to go.'

'Wait a sec. Give me the name of that neighbour you spoke to.'

'What for?'I asked.

'Does it matter? I want to talk to her.'

'Casey Barbers. She's in the book.'

'Thanks. Cheer up, Mike. The way I see it, knowing she's not God makes what she does that much more impressive."

'Goodbye, Dave.'

'Take care.'

When I hung up, I noticed Sati standing in the doorway.' How long have you been there?'I asked.

She stepped inside.' Just a moment. I have to use the bathroom.'

'God has to use a bathroom?'

'She does when she has a human body.'

She hadn't overheard me, I decided. I didn't know if that was good or bad.'I hear your meeting was a success.'

She nodded.' Your daughter enjoyed the last one.'

'Jenny was there?'

'Yes.'

'She must be dragging her mother,'I said.

'Linda brought her boyfriend last night.'

'Dick?'

Generated by ABC Amber LIT Conv
erter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

'Dick.'

'Oh.'I got up slowly.' I better hit the sack.'

She touched my arm as I stepped by. Til have breakfast ready for you when you wake up.'

'Pancakes?'I asked.

'Made with fresh milk. You still trust me as a cook, don't you, Michael?'

Satistood only a couple of feet away, those eyes of hers almost big enough and blue enough to make me believe in Timmy's angel. Once more, I had an overpowering desire to hug her. To bury my face in her sunny hair. To ask her why. But the best I could do was lower my head.

'Itrust you,'I said.

TWELVE

It was Thursday, only four days since I had picked Sati up. A lot had happened in such a short time. I'd been charmed, zapped, poisoned, overwhelmed, and disillusioned. I figured I needed a break. I spent the next few days concentrating on my work.

Sati sensed my desire to be alone and stayed out of my way, quite a feat considering she was living with me in a cramped apartment. I didn't know why she continued to remain in my tiny place. Dozens of people who attended her meetings extended her invitations to move in with them. But not only did she turn them down, she asked that people please not visit her at my apartment. I suppose I should have been thankful for small favours.

Yet if Sati was content to leave me alone, Nick, Fred andJenny were not. They couldn'tunderstand why I wasn'tcoming to the meetings. The excuse that I had to work did little to pacify them, especially when it came to my daugh-ter. She comprehended perhaps a fraction of what Sati said, and it didn't matter. Sati made her happy. Sati chased away the nightmares. Sati was better than Santa Claus.

It was Nick, not Linda, who continued to take Jenny to the meetings. It seemed Dick had not taken to Sati, and apparently Linda felt they were entering a' delicate time'in their relationship. She didn't want to make waves. This talk of delicate Dick times troubled me. But I was scared to ask Linda what she was talking about.

Linda's qualms over Sati's influence on Jenny disappeared. I suppose getting to sleep throughthe entire night without being awakened by a frightened child had a strong effect on her outlook.

Nick would grab me between my comings and goings. The numbers at Sati's meetings were doubling every night, he said. At this rate, the whole world would be listening to her by midsummer. People left and right were being healed. Nick said the testimonials were unbelievable.

His remarks bothered me for opposing reasons. I knew now that the peace experienced during her periods of silence must have been due to suggestion. It was the only rational explanation. Yet I still missed those times. For whatever reason, they had made me feel better.

On the other hand, where were the real miracles? I would ask Nick that every time he stopped me. Just
Generated by ABC Amber LIT Conv
erter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

one paraplegic with a severed spine getting up and walking around the room was what I wanted. Instead, all I heard of were people experiencing relief from complaints that had largely psychosomatic origins: asthma, headaches, high blood pressure. Nick didn't argue the point with me. He wasn't a true believer, not like Fred. But he always had a gleam in his eyes when he spoke of Sati. I wondered if it wasn't just a question of time until he became like Fred.

I had to worry about Nick for business reasons as well. With the dough David had helped me borrow, I had put a down payment on one of the used tractors and trailers I had told the loan officer about. I was still negotiating on the other equipment, but there was little question that I'd soon be needing another two drivers. Nick was supposed to be one of them. He already had his Class 1 licence. I now had solid deals for extra freight. The money would be there, and for whomever I hired,the pay would be steady.

Yet Nick had begun to have second thoughts. In addition to the job in Westwood, he'd picked up a fireplace to build in the valley. He felt things were looking up. I warned him that he couldn't count on it, especially with a pregnant girlfriend. But he wasn't listening. I hadn't realised how much he enjoyed working with his hands. Driving long distance, he confessed, reminded him too much of his dope-dealing days. Those days had been as recent as last week, but he looked at me as if I was nuts when I asked if he would ever return to pushing drugs.

Of course Sati was responsible for most of this. Faith has amazing power, I began to see, even when your God doesn't care if you believe in her or not. Several times I thought of addressing her asK athy Lion when the others were present. But I never did, and I doubt if I thought about it that seriously. I was happy for everyone, I really was.

And I was miserable.

Early the following Wednesday morning, ten days after meeting Sati for the first time, I was coming down my stairs when I ran into Mrs Hutchinson. Scissors and gloves in hand, she was working in her flower garden, using her fingers in ways that would have been unimaginable a couple of weeks ago.

Seeing her this way, I had to stop and think howC asey Barbers had held Sati's picture at a distance to get a better look at it. Yet I refused to let myself hope. It had hurt too much to have the hope crushed the first time.

'If you start getting up any earlier, Mrs Hutchinson,'I said,' I'm going to use you as my alarm clock.'

She stood quickly from her labours, standing remarkably straight for a woman of her age.' Mike, you startled me. Off to work?'

'Yeah, I've got to go to San Onofre and pick up some nuclear waste to dump in a redwood forest up north.'

She laughed.' You're never serious, are you? I've missed you lately. Where have you been?'

"On the road, the usual.'From Nick, I knew she was going to all of Sati's meeting. Yet he had had no idea whether Sati had changed her religious beliefs.'H ow have you been?'I asked.

'Wonderful!'She took a deep breath.' It's nice to be up at this time of day, just before the sun comes up.

It's the only time to work.'

'You do seem to be enjoying a strong second wind.'

Generated by ABC Amber LIT Conv
erter, http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

She knew what I was hinting at. Glancing self-consciously at her hands, she set aside her scissors and gloves.' You're right,'she admitted quietly.' Sometimes I think it's a miracle.'

'Really?'

'I know I had hard words for her inthe beginning. I regret the things I said. Sati- she's not a bad person.'

Mrs Hutchinson spoke seriously.' She's a wonderful person.'

'But is she God?'

Mrs Hutchinson reached out and touched the petal of an opening rose.' I'm going to pick these for her meeting tonight. She looks so beautiful with a flower in her hand.'Mrs Hutchinson shook her head.' What can I say, Mike? Before I always had a yes-or-no answer for everything. But here I've finally met this person who's completely at peace, and she doesn't care what I know. She says I have to learn to say I don't know. So I don't know anything, I guess, except that she's given me some of her peace. And that I thank the Lord for her coming.'

'But she contradictsthe Bible?'I asked.

'Does she? Oh, I guess she does. But I must tell you. I went home last night after her meeting and read the Gospel of John. The words of Jesus were different from her words, and yet I felt they were saying the samething.'

'And what was that?'

Mrs Hutchinson stared at me with open eyes.' That I should rejoice, for the kingdom is at hand.'

I shifted uncomfortably.' Have you spoken to Rever-end Green about this?'I asked.

Her face tensed. She turned away.' I felt terrible that night. I had no idea what he had in his briefcase.

When he almost hurt her hand, I didn't know if I'd ever be able to forgive him. But you've got to understand this, Mike, he's a fine person. He works long hours outside of his ministry duties. He helps runaway kids. He finds ways to get them off the streets. He'd do' anything for you. He'd give youthe shirt off his back if you needed it.'

'Have you spoken to him recently?'

'No,'she said.' I can't get hold of him. All I know is he has resigned as minister of our church.'

'What?'

She nodded.' The church secretary said he came in last Thursday and told her he was quitting.'

'Did he give a reason?'

'Not really. But he said something about going surfing.'

The talk was getting too strange for me.' Where is Sati right now?'I asked.

'I haven't seen her. I think she's still helping Fred deliver his papers.'