Rise (14 page)

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Authors: Stefne Miller

BOOK: Rise
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“Are you being serious right now?”

“Yes.”

“Um … ” It was an interesting, deep, and loaded question. “Well, after spending days crying, I would’ve done whatever it was you needed me to do. I wouldn’t have gone anywhere. It wouldn’t have changed anything, if that’s what you’re getting at.”

“Even if I was bald?” she asked with a small smile.

“Even if you were bald. I woulda just bought you a cute OU hat.”

“And that’s one of the gazillion reasons I love you.”

“I love you too. Just promise me one more thing.”

“What’s that?”

“No more hospitals.”

chapter 17

(Attie)

After briefly checking in with the squad, I gingerly walked out of the locker room and toward the noisy crowd. I really shouldn’t have been out of the house so soon after the surgery, but I didn’t want to miss the chance to sit with Pops and Marme to watch Riley play. As long as I didn’t lift my arms or move around too fast or suddenly, I would be fine. Or at least that’s what I told myself.

The stadium was filled with blue and white, and the sounds from the band whipped the fans into a frenzy. For the first time since football season started at Guthrie High, I was wearing jeans. I also wore Riley’s extra jersey. I liked wearing his jersey more than my uniform.

Someone walked up to me, and without even seeing who it was, I felt uncomfortable.

“Not cheering tonight, Attie?” Tiffany’s voice held its usual malicious tone.

“Not tonight.” Trying to escape, I dashed down the sidewalk toward the bleachers.

She continued to chase me down. “Why?”

“I don’t feel up for it.”

“Personal issues?”

“Sort of.”

“So I’ve heard.” Swooping in like a vulture, she grabbed my arm and stopped me midstep. “You live a double life, don’t you?”

I jerked my arm out of her hand. “What do you mean by that?”

“I think you know exactly what I mean. Luckily your secret’s safe with me. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same for others.”

My eyes scanned the stadium in hopes that I would catch a glimpse of someone I knew, but the crowd was too large to make out anyone’s face. I was stuck dealing with Tiffany on my own.

“My secret?”

“You forget I dated Riley too. I know what he’s like, and I know how difficult he can be to resist.” She gave a vicious laugh as she folded her arms in front of her. I’d never wanted to punch anyone more in my life. “But I never got myself in the predicament you did.”

“Why don’t you come right out and tell me what you’re talking about, because I don’t have a clue.”

“It’s all over the school. If you hadn’t been gone all week, you would’ve known that.”

“What’s all over school?”

“The news about your procedure,” she whispered.

“That? Why would that be all over the school? And who the heck cares, anyway?”

“Look, when the cheerleading captain gets knocked up—”

“What?” I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach.

“Everyone knows. Quit acting all innocent. Karen saw you at the OB/GYN on Tuesday, and then you end up having a ‘little surgery’ yesterday. We all know you had an abortion; no need to act like you didn’t.”

I started walking again, my feet furiously carrying me to the stands as my eyes searched for Pops and Marme. “Have you lost your mind, Tiffany? That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“I guess the truth hurts.”

I spun around and grabbed her by the arm. “It isn’t the truth. I was at the OB/GYN with my friend Nicole. She’s the one that’s pregnant, not me. My procedure had nothing to do with the office visit. That’s the truth, but I wouldn’t expect you to care.”

“Little innocent princess get her crown tarnished? Wonder if they’ll still want you singing up there on stage at church. And poor Riley. From what I understand, he didn’t agree with your decision. I hope the two of you can survive this.”

“Don’t you worry about Riley and me.”

She pulled her arm away from me, gave a grin, and sauntered off, leaving me with my head spinning and black spots forming in my line of vision.

I let myself slowly fall to the ground.

“Attie?”

Feeling cold and clammy, I lay back to keep from passing out.

“Attie!” Tammy ran up beside me. “Are you okay? Do I need to get the team doctor?”

“No, just a little dizzy.”

“Wait here, let me get the doctor.”

I clutched onto her arm as she started to dart off. “No. I’m fine.”

“Are you sure? You look horrible. What if you’ve got an infection in your incision or something?”

“Oh, I’ve got an infection all right. A seeping, disgusting, hate-filled infection called Tiffany.”

“Oh, sweet Lord above, what’s she done now?”

I grabbed her by the chin and forced her to look at me. “If you heard something horrible about me, would you tell me?”

“Of course. Why? What did she say?”

“You haven’t heard anything? You haven’t heard any rumors?”

“No new ones. But I wasn’t there yesterday or today, so—”

“This has gotten completely out of control.”

The referee blew his whistle in the background, and the roar of the crowd heightened.

“Attie Reed, tell me right now. What’s going on?”

“It can wait. The game started. Wait until I can tell you and Riley at the same time. I don’t think I can repeat it more than once.”

“Are you sure? This sounds bad.”

“I wish I could say you’re wrong.” The crowd cheered, and the band started playing the fight song. “Here, help me up. My man candy’s taking the field.”

She pulled me up by the arm opposite the incision and made sure I was steady. “I’m glad to see that you still have your sense of humor.”

“That’s about all I’ve got,” I admitted.

“Oh, not true.” She entwined her arm in mine and led me toward the bleachers. “You’ve got me.”

“Lucky me, and I mean that sincerely.”

“Where do you want to sit?”

“Do you mind if we sit with Riley’s parents? This is probably going to be the only game where I can do that.”

“Sure, I’d love to hang out with my principal on a Friday night. It’s what all the cool kids do.”

It may have just been my imagination, but as I searched the crowd for the Bennetts, it felt like students were staring at me or talking with someone and pointing my direction. I might as well have been standing there without any clothes on. I felt bare and completely exposed.

By the grace of God, Pops spotted us and waved us down after only a few moments.

I squeezed through the row of screaming fans and gave Nicole, Joshua, and Gramps a hug before taking a seat next to Marme. She wore two large buttons on her jacket. One with a picture of Riley in his uniform and the other was a picture of me in mine.

“Perfect timing,” she said, waving her pom-pom in the air. “Riley’s about to go in.”

“Let’s go Blue Jays!” Nicole cheered.

I glanced down at the squad and caught Tiffany glaring in my direction, but then I spotted Riley and watched him take his place on the field. It was time to enjoy watching him play. My latest soap opera episode could wait until after the game.

chapter 18

(Riley)

“Pause, rewind, repeat,” Jennifer urged. “She said what?”

“She said that people think I had an abortion. Somehow they found out about my surgery yesterday, and they concocted the abortion story. I can’t believe Tiffany would stoop to this level.”

“Charlie, we don’t even know that she started the rumor.”

“The heck we don’t,” Tess screamed. “My brain can’t even function I’m so ticked off. I’m normally not a violent person, but right now I could absolutely knock her block off.”

“Tammy?” Attie asked, looking over her shoulder. “You okay? You haven’t said anything.”

“I have no words … absolutely no words.”

“That’s a new one,” Jennifer said. “She’s really gotta be shocked to be speechless.”

Tammy perked up. “No wait, I’ve found the words.”

“Brace yourselves,” Kent suggested. “This is gonna get ugly.”

“That girl is an absolute crime against humanity, and she must be destroyed. An atrocity like her cannot be permitted to exist any longer.”

“And there it was,” Kent said.

Attie sat in the passenger seat of her car with her head in her hands while Curt, Tammy, Kent, Anne, Jennifer, Tess, Chase, and I sat crammed in the car in a sullen haze. We were floored, and other than Tammy, we weren’t sure what to say.

“Who are these people?” Tammy snapped. “Who acts like this? I mean really, I dislike a lot of people, but I would never, ever try to destroy someone like that. I like to joke around, but I would never actually do something that would hurt someone else.”

Attie climbed across the front seat and into my lap as Tammy continued to rant. “I mean, hello, people, take out a loan and buy a freakin’ clue—we’re in high school, for cryin’ out loud. Is anything so stinkin’ important that you’ve gotta act like that? I seriously need a barf bag ‘cause I’m about to hurl.”

“Stick your head out the window,” Kent said.

“Remember to breathe,” Anne said. “Inhale and then exhale.”

“I know how to freakin’ breathe, Anne.”

“I’m just trying to help!”

Attie buried her face in my neck.

“Everyone cut it out,” Jennifer screamed. “This isn’t helping the situation.”

The car got silent. I looked into the rearview mirror and watched as everyone sat and stared into space.

“Attie,” Chase finally said, “what do you want us to do? Do you want us to go out and start defending you? Do we need to set the record straight?”

Attie sat up and looked toward the back of the car. Exhaustion filled her face. “I don’t know. My gut reaction is to run out and try to set the record straight, but in reality I don’t know if that’ll do any good. It could just end up making things worse.”

“Charlie, I don’t want people walking around thinking that we’re like that. If people wanna say we’re having sex, that’s one thing. It’s not the end of the world. But they’re accusing us of killing a baby; I’m not okay with that. People think you talked me into letting you have an abortion. I can’t stand the thought of anyone believing that we would do that. That you would do that. It’s so far away from who you are.”

“Or who you are, Riley,” Anne added. “We all know that.”

Attie stroked my cheek with the back of her fingers. “I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I’ve caused you all this trouble.”

“You aren’t causing me trouble; don’t even say that.”

“That jealous wench is causing it,” Tess spat.

“I know, but if I hadn’t encroached on her territory—”

“She’d be doing it to someone else,” I said.

“Excuse me while I pick myself up off the floor,” Tammy said. “You’re telling us you think this is your fault?”

“A little, maybe.”

Tammy thrust forward in her seat. “I call bull crap on that. Tiffany thought she was the cat’s meow until you showed up—that much is true, but the proverbial crap hit the fan because she was so jealous of you that she lost all common sense. The girl’s a nut job, plain and simple, and she needs a freakin’ lobotomy.”

“And she needs to be spayed while they’re at it,” Tess added. “We don’t need any Tiffany offspring cavorting around town in the future. They’ll just end up causing our kids the same trouble.”

“Preach it, sista,” Jennifer howled.

“Watch it, guys,” Chase warned. “You’re whipping yourselves into a frenzy again.”

“We aren’t whipping into anything,” Tammy said. “Tiffany hurled us into it.”

Attie threw her hand into the air, motioning for everyone to be quiet. “Can you guys give me the weekend? I just need some time to think.”

“That’s fine,” Tammy said. “But if you’re gonna turn around and tell us that we have to behave some more, then I’m gonna have to find a new hobby.”

“I’ll buy you a painting kit,” Attie teased. “Maybe you can teach yourself to paint.”

“Deal.”

(Attie)

I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t sleep. My mind raced with horrible ideas of how I wanted to retaliate, and then guilt would overtake me and I’d cry over thinking such horrible thoughts. I was on an emotional roller coaster and desperately wanted off, but the best I could come up with at the time was to make my way down to the kitchen for a snack.

The stove light was on, and I could see Pops standing at the counter as I entered.

“Hey, baby girl. You couldn’t sleep either?”

“Nope.”

“Why don’t you join me? Want some cereal?”

“Sure.” I sat down in my seat and watched as he grabbed a bowl out of the cupboard. “Did Riley tell you what happened at the game?”

“He did. What kind of cereal do you want?”

“Frosted Flakes.”

“Good choice,” he said, smiling. Tucking the box of cereal under his arm, he grabbed the bowl and milk and made his way to the table. “Are you hanging in there?”

“Do I have a choice?” I asked.

“I guess not.”

I closed my eyes and listened to the corn flakes fall into the bowl and the milk slosh over them. “This reminds me of when I was a kid and my dad and I would eat a bowl of cereal before we went to bed.”

“Nothing like a small sugar rush before tucking in for the night.”

“You got that right.”

He sat down at the table and looked over at me. “So do you wanna talk about it? I’ll listen if you need to talk.”

“About the rumor?”

“Yep.”

Tears immediately welled up in my eyes. “This is a big one, you know? It isn’t a flat tire or being called a name. This is being accused of killing a baby. I don’t even know how to grasp it.”

“I don’t know that you can. It’s impossible to make sense out of something that’s completely senseless, and that’s what this is.”

“And cruel.”

“Very cruel.” He nodded before taking a bite of cereal.

“Would you have believed it? If you’d have just been the principal and we were two different kids who were students. Given the circumstances, would you have believed it?”

He set his spoon down. “You know, Attiline, I’ve seen so much, I don’t know if it would’ve even fazed me. Yes, I probably would’ve believed it. Unfortunately, that’s the reality of the world we live in. Sex and the consequences of that choice are lived out every day in high schools around the country.”

“We’ve tried so hard to be responsible and pure—for lack of a better term. It’s just ironic that this is what we end up being accused of. If it weren’t so sad, it might be funny. And Riley … poor Riley, even though he won’t say it, I know he’s distraught about it.”

“Really?”

“We sat out there alone in the parking lot for an hour, and all he could do was say, ‘I can’t believe people believe that,’ over and over again. I think it kills him to know that people who have known him his entire life believe this rumor about him. Nobody even bothered to ask; they just believed it. They don’t know any better when it comes to me, but for them to know Riley like they do and still accept it as truth, I don’t get it, and I know he doesn’t either.”

Pops’s shoulders sagged, and he shook his head slowly. “For some reason people like to assume the worst about others. I don’t think people who know Riley believe it because they think he’s actually capable of doing it, but instead they chose to believe it because it’s something they might actually do if in those circumstances. It suddenly makes it okay if someone like you two does it. It makes them feel better about the choices they make. Maybe it makes them feel less alone, I don’t know.

“It probably sounds sick and twisted, but that’s really all I can come up with. Let’s face it—if in fact you had been pregnant, it would’ve been a very big deal. You would’ve faced a lot of public scrutiny and judgment. That’s a lot for a teenager to have to own, and it seems so big that unfortunately a lot of kids make the decision that you’re being accused of making. So people believing that you two would make that choice isn’t so farfetched. Many, many great kids make poor choices and out of that make an unfortunate mistake.”

“That makes sense.”

“And just for the record,” he said, placing his hand over mine, “if you ever found yourselves in that situation, I want you to know that you could tell Molly and me. We might freak out at first, but it wouldn’t change the way we feel about you, and we wouldn’t love you any less. I don’t ever want you to make a decision that could affect the rest of your lives out of fear. There’s nothing we can’t handle as a family, and there’s nothing that can’t be forgiven.”

“Thank you. You don’t need to worry about us though—”

“I realize that, but I still want you to know. You can come to us with anything—anything.”

“I appreciate that. Maybe you could share it with Riley too.”

“I will. I’ll spend some time with him.”

“I love that you’re so worried about me all the time, but I worry about Riley, and I’m afraid that people don’t show him as much concern as they show me. Everything I deal with, he deals with—even more, maybe.”

“You’re right. I need to make a better effort at that. He’s been through a lot in the last year and a half too. I should probably check in on him more often.”

I watched as he took another bite of cereal. “What do you think Riley and I should do about this?”

“Tell me what you’re thinking.”

“I’ve been living in the Psalms and Proverbs over the last several weeks. They’re all about living through crap and how we should handle difficult situations.”

“You’ve got a good head on your shoulders, Attiline. I have a feeling you’ll figure out what to do. You’ll know what’s best. We could all learn from your example.”

“I wouldn’t go that far.”

“I would. If someone attacks me or my family, I have to admit that the Bible isn’t the first place I think to go.”

“You’d be surprised how much it helps.”

He laughed. “I guess it’s pretty pitiful when you’re surprised that the Bible has some good instruction in it.”

“Hey, we’re human.”

“Yes, we are.” He pointed at my bowl. “And you’re a human who hasn’t touched her Frosted Flakes.”

“Oh.” I picked up my spoon and took a bite of cereal.

“So about this football obsession of yours, does the Bible say anything about that?”

“Probably chapters.”

“Well, if you’re gonna be obsessed, now’s the right season to do it. We sure are looking good … ”

We talked football until we finished our Frosted Flakes, bid goodnight, and I trudged my way back up the stairs to my room, where Jesus sat waiting for me.

“What can I do for you?” he asked, his face full of concern.

“Tell me what to do. What do I tell my friends? What do I say to Riley?”

“You tell me.”

“What?”

“Come on, you know where you need to go to find the answer. Tell me what you’re going to do.”

Even though I was exhausted, I grabbed the Bible off the nightstand and opened it to the middle of the book.

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