Read Relentless (Relentless Soul Book 1) Online
Authors: Rachel Ryan,Eve Cassidy
Ava
Girlfriend?
Where did that come from? We haven't spoken about that, so much for taking it slow. I'm Jeremy Stone's girlfriend; I'm going to be keeping that out of my reports though. I don't need to have the attention on me. Staring at the blonde in front of me I try to push down the feeling that I shouldn't trust anything this girl says. I don't know what it is, but there's just… something. I'm not going to be the jealous girlfriend but there is just something about her.
"Hi, Jo it's nice to finally meet you. Jeremy has been really excited to catch up with you. He has told me so much about you." But he left out one very important piece of information I think to myself.
"I can't really say the same, but Jeremy doesn't always tell me about all of his women."
Just then Jeremy looks between us.
"We better go. We need to get ready."
Grabbing my hand Jeremy drags me off the bus. The walk into the arena via the back door is busy with the old friends catching up. I walk in silence listening to them relive their past. I really enjoy hearing about the bands past I may have to get some stories from Jo to use in the next article. The band goes to the dressing room to get ready while I make my way to the side of the stage where I normally sit. I left Jo, Em and Tori all in the dressing room to do their jobs and for Jo to catch up with the guys. Em and Tori have made a thing of coming to join me on the side of the stage to keep me company when the guys are performing. They've become great friends in such a short time and I know that friendship will continue when the tour is over.
"So Ava how long have you and Jeremy been together?"
Jo interrupts me from listening to the guys start their intro. Looking over my shoulder I see her giving me what seems like a genuine smile. Maybe my first impression of her was a little off.
"A few weeks I suppose, I'm actually a reporter for Treble Magazine. The bands label organized for me to go on tour with them and document their rise to fame. I guess…well Jeremy and I sort of hit it off."
"Have you hooked up with Coops or something he has been giving you odd looks all night?"
What? Where did that come from? Why does she feel that it's any of her business? Plastering a fake smile on my face I turn back to the band and answer over my shoulder. "No, We are just really good mates. He helped me get my apartment when I first arrived in L.A and has been amazing since we've been on tour."
Hoping to end the conversation I start recording the show so it can be uploaded to the website. That seems to do the trick and she starts talking to Tori about a fashion school she wants to go to. Watching the band perform has become one of my favorite moments. Luke and Hunter explode with so much energy that even I feel it. Jeremy becomes the flirty egotistical bad boy, that really deep down he's not. And Brody well he beams from ear to ear, performing is his high. It brings out the life in his eyes. As the song finishes Jeremy speaks to the crowd. Apparently this show is going to be different and Brody is going to sing the next song. This has never happened. Starting to record again I watch Brody move up to the center of the stage. Hunter and Luke start off the intro to Escape and a few seconds later Brody closes his eyes and starts singing. His voice is calm and slow but it's tantalizing. I'm completely drawn to him and I can't tear my eyes away from him. I'm lost in his words listening to every heart felt word.
"I need to escape, I can't take anymore
I'm not the same boy I was before."
That line gets me every time I hear this song and I wonder what went on in his life to write such a gut wrenching song.
Closing my eyes I keep my phone pointed on Brody, my heart shatters every time I hear this song but it's even worse listening to him sing it. I feel every ounce of pain he has, I know just from this song that he has a deep past. All I want is to hug him, hold him and be there for him. The song finishes and I still have my eyes closed. Finally I take the chance of opening my eyes and I see both Jeremy and Brody looking at me. Their faces have changed into happy Rock star looks again but I feel really low after that. My emotions overwhelm me and I can't stay here anymore. Turning around with my head lowered I walk past the girls.
"Ava, are you okay sweetie you look a bit pale?"
"I'm fine Em I just need some water."
Emma looks at me and her face softens. "I need one too." turning to Tori and Jo she mumbles a see you soon.
Standing in the dressing room Emma looks at me.
"You're not fine what's going on?"
"I have no bloody clue. Every time I hear that song it breaks my heart but hearing Brody sing it I just want to vomit, scream and cry all at once. The pain and emotion in that song just grabs me, every time."
"It's a deep song I know, I don't know what happened in his life but I think it was bad. Speaking of Brody what's going on with you two?"
"We aren't really talking, since the night Jeremy and I had sex."
"Why?"
"We kind of had a huge fight. He was acting like a jerk and pretty much compared me to the groupie whores. We haven't even been running together since that night."
"What caused the argument?"
"Because he thinks I'm better than a fuck in a dressing room with a guy I 'barely know'." Using air quotes I emphasis my point.
"He really cares about you, Ava, we all do. None of us want to see you get hurt. I think Brody is just taking it a bit more serious than the rest of us."
"I just can't understand why?"
"I have no idea. And by the way, when did you become Jeremy Stone's girlfriend?"
"Umm, tonight apparently. What do you think of Jo?"
"She seems nice."
"Yeah I don't know, there is something about her."
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know. I just got the strangest feeling deep down that she isn't completely trustworthy."
Emma gives me a small grin "Do you think it's because she's a good friend of your boyfriends?"
"No not that. I don't know. I don't want to judge on first impressions, but… I just don't know.
***
The band rushes off the stage and Jeremy picks me up off my feet swinging me around in a hug.
"Dundee, were we not great?"
Hearing a scoff behind me I hear Jo laugh "Dundee?"
Jeremy looks over my shoulder to her "Yeah, Ava is Australian and it pushes her little buttons when I say it."
Breaking into the conversation I smile at Jeremy and give him a kiss "Jer, you guys are always amazing." Placing my hand on Brody's arm I look around them "Where did the idea to let Brody sing come from?" Jeremy looks across to Jo and smiles.
"Jo did and the fans ate it up. They loved it. We may have to do it more often. Jo you are a star."
Brody
I can't take my eyes off Ava tonight. I know she's Jeremy's girl and their relationship is apparently now official, but this girl is just amazing. Ever since Hunter and I realized the true extent of my feelings, I haven't been able to stop thinking about her. When we performed 'Escape' I found my eyes drifting to her throughout the song and it touched my soul to see the raw emotion written on her beautiful face as she stood in the wings of the stage listening to me sing. I forgot about the thousands of other people in the room and felt like I was pouring my heart out to Ava, showing her the real me. The real me that I constantly try to hide. Ava has seen small glimpses of me and my life but she is still unaware of the emotional baggage, the trust issues, the insecurities, the terrible memories.
I wrote 'Escape' at a time when I was struggling to cope with the pain of losing someone very close to me. It was my way of getting it all out. Most people talk to a shrink when they can't handle life, I write songs.
Pushing these thoughts to the back of my mind I try to concentrate on what Luke is talking about. After the show we decided to go out and celebrate with our old friend Jo at one of the many dance clubs in Dallas. We are in a secluded area in the VIP section and we are just all catching up and reminiscing. Looking across the table my eyes find Ava's staring straight at me. She quickly looks away, but as I watch her, her eyes drift back to mine. Jeremy is sitting beside her, but his body is turned and leaning toward Jo on his other side. They are deep in conversation about something, so Jeremy doesn't notice when Ava gets up and heads toward the stairs. I look around our large group and no one else seems to notice Ava walking away, so I stand and follow her down the stairs. Catching up to her just as she reaches the front entrance, I spin her around to face me and ask
"Where are you going?"
She looks down at the floor, softly stating "I have a headache, I need some air."
My protective side makes an appearance again and I follow her out the door. I silently walk beside her as she continues down the street. After a few minutes of silent walking she sits down on a sidewalk bench. I watch her as she begins to rub her temples gently with her fingers.
Sitting down beside her, I place my hand on her shoulder. "Ava, are you okay?"
She glances at my hand on her shoulder and seems uncomfortable, so I move it. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just the start of a migraine, I think." She smiles and stares down at the ground. "So, how did it feel to sing your song tonight?"
"It was actually pretty cool. I don't have a great voice like Jeremy, but it was cool being the center of attention for a change."
"You definitely had my attention. Brody, that song is so beautiful. It tugs on my heartstrings every time I hear it. But tonight, when you sang it, I felt it deep down in my soul. You have a great story telling voice, and with those lyrics…wow."
Listening to her talk about me in such a way kind of makes me feel embarrassed, but also makes me feel so fucking good. To have this beautiful, amazing girl giving me these compliments makes me feel…special. I study her pretty face as she stares at me. A few unruly strands have escaped her messy bun, and as I raise my hand to tuck them behind her ear, my fingers brush her cheek. Feeling the warmth from her cheek I stretch my hand across her forehead.
"Ava, you're burning up." She touches a hand to her forehead as I stand and pull her up to her feet "Come on, let's get you home. You must be coming down with the flu or something." Wrapping my arm around her I guide her back in the direction of the club.
"I have had a slight cough and now that I think about it, my bodies been aching a little bit."
Trying not to mentally picture said body parts, I remind her "Plus the headache."
Reaching the club, I drop my arm from around her shoulder and follow her upstairs. Jeremy only notices Ava's return when she taps him on the shoulder. "Jer, I'm not feeling well. Do you mind if we go back to the bus?"
Jeremy stands up and wraps his arms around Ava "Sure, Baby, whatever you want. We have a big day tomorrow, so we should get a good night's sleep anyway."
Ava looks confused "What's happening tomorrow?"
"Don't you remember I have that big charity lunch that my mother organized in Fort Worth? I told you about it a couple days ago."
"Oh…It must have slipped my mind." Or he just forgot to tell her, which I'll put my money on.
Grabbing my jacket from my chair, I coax the others "Come on let's go."
***
Early the next morning as I'm pouring myself a glass of juice, Jeremy climbs up on the bus and plonks down into one of the arm chairs with a slight frown on his face.
"Shit, man. What am I going to do? I need to leave in a couple of hours for Fort Worth, but Ava still isn't feeling well. I went out and got her some pills this morning, but she is still running a high temp and she said her body is aching. She must have the flu. I can't take her to this gala now. But if I go, I can't keep an eye on her."
"Hey, you can't miss it. You go and I'll check on Ava for you throughout the day. If she gets worse, I'll just give you a call."
Jeremy walks up and gives me one of those man hugs "Thanks, dude. I'll go and let her know. I'll probably take Jo with me instead, she heard about Ava not feeling well and offered to be my plus one."
Shaking my head I mutter "I bet she did." Jeremy must not have heard me though as he climbs down off the bus.
Jeremy has no idea, but Jo has had a major crush on him since we were kids, and judging by the way she's been watching him and Ava together, I'm pretty sure that is still the case. Jeremy always thought there was something going on between me and o, but every time he caught us huddled and whispering, we were talking about him. She was always scared of revealing her true feelings to him as she was scared of rejection. And who could blame her? I knew firsthand what rejection could be like. I had been rejected by my own parents for most of my life, with them choosing drugs over their own child. It is not the best feeling in the world. I always encouraged Jo to tell him how she was feeling because life's too short to spend your time wondering about what could have happened if you'd only just had the courage. That's some strong advice that I should probably take on myself.
***
Two hours later I watch as Jeremy and Jo pull out of the lot in the sports car that Jeremy had hired for the day. I make my way over to Ava's bus and climb up the steps. Tori and Emma are out shopping today for new outfits for our shows, so Ava is alone on the bus. Scanning the area at the front, I hear a cough coming from the back room. I knock on the door and a soft voice calls "Come in."
"Hey, Ava. How are you feeling?" She shrugs her shoulders and pats the bed beside her motioning for me to sit down. Sitting down beside her legs, I lean forward and press my hand to her forehead. "You still feel too hot."
"I'm okay. My body is still aching and my chest hurts, but I'll be fine."
"How long have you had the chest pain?" I'm beginning to get a little worried, if she's suffering from fever and chest pain, there may be an infection.
"Only since this morning." She starts coughing again and I can see her wincing from the pain.
"Ava, I think you should see a Doctor." She's shaking her head no, but I'm not backing down. "I think you may have a chest infection. I'm not taking no for an answer."
Half an hour later the limo pulls into the emergency bay of one the hospitals in Dallas. Helping Ava out of the car I lead her through the doors and to reception. A young nurse gives us some paperwork to fill out and we sit and wait for a Doctor to see us. While we are waiting we chat about the show last night and Ava tells me about some of the articles she has written and the videos she sent through to the magazine to post on their website.
She looks over at me "The fans are going to love the video of your performance of 'Escape' last night. How old were you when you wrote that song?"
I take a few seconds to answer, I always tense up when journalists ask about that song. But this is Ava, I can trust her. "I was seventeen."
She shakes her head in disbelief "Wow, they are some powerful lyrics for a seventeen year old. I know it's none of my business but did something happen in your life to inspire such emotional words?"
Leaning forward, I rest my elbows on my knees as I internally debate whether I should share the details with Ava. I know I can trust her but what will she think of me after I tell her. This isn't a story I share with many people.
"When I was fifteen, my baby brother Samuel died." I feel her hand touch my leg and it sends jolts of energy through me so I continue. "I came home from school one day and my parents were passed out in the den. They had obviously been shooting up and were wasted." I hear a small gasp escape her lips. "I couldn't see Sammy anywhere in the den, so I went to his room. He was face down in the cot, so I thought he was sleeping. I went back out to clean up the mess that my parents had made and about ten minutes later I went back to check on Sammy again, and this time I got a little worried as I didn't see any movement from his breathing. I went and picked him up and he was gone. He was only six months old." Running my hands through my hair I can feel the tears building up in my eyes and I blink them away. "They ruled it as SIDS, but I know it was neglect. They spent all their fucking time shooting up and getting high. I should have been there. I should have prevented it. I'll never forgive myself for not being there for Sammy." Ava's small hand grabs hold of mine and she holds it in her lap.
"Brody, it wasn't your fault. It's so unfair that you have been burdened with that guilt. They were his parents, not you."
I shake my head "But I should have got them help, they needed rehab…If I had made them get help, it could have been avoided and Sammy would still be alive today."
"Brody, if they didn't stop for their newborn baby, nothing would have made them stop. You were fifteen years old, still a baby yourself." She grabs hold of my chin and pulls my face toward hers. "Brody, I'm so sorry you have had to live with this guilt for so long, but baby, there is nothing for you to feel guilty about. You were fifteen. That amount of responsibility should never have been placed on you." I stare into her golden eyes, her words filling me with a sense of calm. When she called me Baby, I just wanted to pull her into my arms and hold her. This woman is so amazing and I just need to tell her. I need to tell her I'm in love with her. I can't hold it in any more, it's tearing me up inside.
"Ava…"
"Ava Flores?" An elderly male Doctor is standing in front of us waiting for a reply.
***
An hour later and Ava has been admitted to hospital for treatment of pneumonia. The Doctor said it's only a mild case, but they just want to keep an eye on her overnight to make sure that it doesn't get worse. I've tried calling Jeremy's cell a few times, but have had no response. He's due back in Dallas by five o'clock to prepare for tonight's show; glancing down at my watch I see it's only two o'clock. I got hold of Tori and Emma about twenty minutes ago and they're on their way here.
Ava is lying back on her bed watching me "Thanks for everything, Brody. If you hadn't forced me to come to the hospital, it could have been worse. Thank you for being there for me." I sit down on the chair beside the bed and hold her hand in mine.
"Ava, I'll always be here for you." Bringing her hand up to mine, I kiss her palm and watch her eyes drift closed and a small sigh leaves her mouth. I continue to hold her hand and rub little circles on her palm with my thumb.
"Ava, I…"
"Hello, Ava?" Fuck interrupted again. Turning around I see Emma and Tori walking into the room, their arms loaded with flowers, chocolates and magazines. I let go of Ava's hand and tell her I'm going to go get a coffee, leaving the girls alone to fuss over her. As I leave the room, I pull out my phone and try Jeremy's number again. He finally answers and I can hear quite a bit of background noise.
"Hey Brody. What's up?"
"What the fuck have you been doing? I've been trying to call you for an hour. Ava's in hospital, Jeremy. She's got pneumonia, Dude."
Hearing Jeremy curse under his breath, then "Jo, we gotta go." He says to me "I'm on my way." I give him the details about which hospital and room number then disconnect the call.