Reign or Shine (18 page)

I looked toward the entrance of the room. "Elizabeth just left. But she was waiting for your ... uh ... your
call.
I'l go get her."

"No, Nikki. It's fine. I wil speak with her later. How is your father?"

I swal owed. "Not wel ."

"But he stil lives?"

I nodded.

"Elizabeth tel s me that you were to drink a potion that the king provided to you. I wil assume that you haven't yet."

I touched the bottle. "No, I haven't." "Do you
want
to be queen of the Shadowlands?" he asked.

I shook my head. "Not if I can help it." "Then you have to drink it."

There was that phrase again.
Have to.
Even somebody I didn't know was tel ing me what to do.

184

I let out a shaky sigh. "I wanted to see my father again before I do anything."

Something flashed behind his eyes and it wasn't entirely pleasant. "You do realize that you're putting Elizabeth's position as the next queen at risk by

delaying."

"Look," I said, sharper than I meant to, "this isn't exactly easy for me, you know. And it's not easy for Elizabeth, either. It's not like she even wants to be queen."

His eyes widened a fraction. "Of course she does. It's al she speaks of and your actions--or rather inactions-- are ruining everything for her."

That was a very strange thing for him to say. I was ruining everything? "She's accepted it, of course. It's not like she has much of a choice, does she?"

"No, of course. You're right. Please forgive me for being rude. The choice is yours alone, of course." The edge of annoyance in his expression disappeared and his gaze slowly moved over my face and down my neck to the vial on the chain. "If by chance you do end up becoming queen, I want you

to know that you can contact me anytime. For any reason at al . I would enjoy the chance to get to know a lovely girl like yourself on a much more personal level. I'm sure we could become very close friends."

The way he said it made me feel extremely uncomfortable. This was the man my aunt was head over heels in love with? He was a major sleaze.

Real y good-looking, but a jerk. I knew I'd just met him, but first impressions were enough to go by. Besides, I'd already dealt with a good-looking jerk that evening--Chris--so I was a little more wary of this sort of thing now. I trusted my instincts. And my instincts told me Kieran wasn't a nice guy.

"I'l keep that in mind," I said dryly.

"However, if Elizabeth
does
become queen of the Shadowlands, I would like to give her a little something special to ...
commemorate this event.

Do you have any suggestions for me? Perhaps jewels, or furs. More obedient servants, perhaps?"

I real y didn't like this guy. At
all.

"I know she likes the perfume you already gave her," I said with distaste. "She even wears the bottle on a chain around her neck."

"Perfume?" His frown deepened and confusion flashed across his expression. "I've never given her perfume before."

"Maybe I heard her wrong."

"No," he replied quickly. "If Elizabeth said I gave her the perfume, then I certainly did. I give her many gifts and I have a tendency to forget some of them."

He glanced over his shoulder at something I couldn't see. When he turned back, he said, "I must go now, Princess Nikki. Please tel Elizabeth that I wish to

speak with her at her earliest convenience."

His image faded until there was nothing but shal ow water in the basin.

Elizabeth had said that she received her perfume from her boyfriend. Had Kieran real y forgotten? Maybe she had 186

more than one boyfriend? She was a beautiful woman, so it was entirely possible. I hoped I hadn't ruined anything by mentioning it to Kieran.

Then again, after my very short conversation with the handsome Kieran, I figured Elizabeth would be better off without him. I did not like the way he leered

at me. I mean, the guy had to be at least thirty years old--and that was assuming that demons aged at the same rate humans did.

Creepy.

And what was al that about Elizabeth
wanting
to be queen? I mean, I understood that she'd accepted the inevitable, but the way Kieran said it, it sounded

like she was actual y looking forward to it. What was that al about?

I started to wonder what was taking Elizabeth so long, so I left the room to look for her, feeling uncomfortable being in the room with the gazer any longer. I

headed along the hal way to the end where it turned to the right and kept fol owing it until I saw Elizabeth go into a room up ahead. When I got to the doorway, I saw that she had a tray with a jug of water and a silver goblet. She poured a few drops from her smal perfume bottle into the jug and then stirred the contents with a large silver-handled spoon.

"Elizabeth?" I said out loud.

She turned to look at me with wide eyes. "Nikki! You startled me." "Sorry."

"I was about to come back for you." "What is that?" I asked, pointing at the jug. "I thought that was perfume you wore around your neck." She touched the blue bottle and I noticed her hand was shaking a little. "This . . . no, this is medicine. It's to help with Desmond's pain. A few drops wil ease his suffering. My perfume is in another bottle." She smiled. "They al look very similar, don't they?"

I studied the vial skeptical y. They did look similar.
Really
similar. "Could be Gatorade for al I know."

She tilted her head to the side. "What is Gatorade?"

"It's a drink. You can get it in the blue flavor if you want."

She smiled. "The human world is a fascinating place, isn't it?"

"Depends on the day, real y."

"Indeed." She picked up the tray. "I'm ready. We can go see your father now if you wish." I swal owed. "Okay."

She left the room. I fol owed her through the mazelike hal ways. I braced myself to hear another cry of pain, but there was only silence.

I tried to remain calm and not overthink things, but my brief conversation with Kieran had deeply confused me. I had a hard time concentrating on anything

else.

"I have never given her perfume before."

It was probably nothing, of course. It was also probably nothing that Elizabeth's perfume vial looked exactly the same as the container of my father's pain

meds. My aunt was a kind woman who was looking after her dying brother. She was sacrificing her freedom to become queen because she felt it was her

duty. She didn't even want to be queen.

188

Who would want to be trapped in this castle without the opportunity of leaving?

But stil . Something felt off to me.

"It's al she speaks of." Kieran's words echoed in my mind.

"Desmond," my aunt said as she entered my father's room. Michael stood at the far side against the wal , silent. He looked at me and he smiled a little-just enough for me to see. "Nikki is here with me."

"Yes," a deep voice replied. "I sensed that she had returned."

My father, in ful demon form, lay on a huge canopied bed in the middle of the room. He raised his head a little to look at me and I saw his eyes flash red.

"Nikki." His voice was weak. "You shouldn't have returned. I didn't want you to see me like this again. Please don't be afraid."

My heart clenched and I went directly to his side. This time, unlike last night when his demon form had taken me by surprise and scared me deeply, I could see him more clearly. He had coal black skin and a ridged forehead with large, curved horns protruding from his temples. His cheekbones and chin were

sharp and angular. The tips of his ears came to a point and his eyes were catlike and glowed with dul red light in the dimness of the room.

The room was a bit different from the others I'd seen. While I could tel that it stil had black stone wal s and floors, it had a few more personal touches.

Colorful draperies and beautiful y detailed paintings covered the wal s. The scenes depicted seemed to be those of my world: waterfal s, sunsets, and beautiful meadows. In a frame among the other paintings there was an oil painting of a smiling woman who looked remarkably like my mother. It was dim in there, lit by a few torches.

My father was covered by a blanket, but his large, heavily muscled bare arms lay on top. The skin looked leathery, similar to the wings that extended from

his back, folded in on themselves so I could barely see them now. His hands were clenched over his stomach as if he expected to be racked with pain at any moment.

I wanted to tel him about my Darkling form. How I'd shifted completely and was stil okay. How maybe I was the exception--that maybe I wasn't at risk of dying early like the others had. But I stil didn't know for sure. I didn't want to worry him or Elizabeth, so I held my tongue.

Elizabeth,
who wanted to take the throne. According to her boyfriend, that is.

I reached out and put my hand on top of my father's, and the skin did feel leathery, but smooth and warm. He looked up at me with surprise.

"I had to see you again," I said.

"Why?" he asked hoarsely.

"Because you're my father."

His currently hairless brows drew together. "Nikki . . . you have to go home and be happy. Be with your mother. Take care of her for me. Please forget

about al of this. It's for the best."

"Your father is right," Elizabeth said.

Her voice made me tense.

190

I watched her warily as she put the tray on a bedside table and then poured water mixed with the medicine into the goblet and brought it to my father's lips.

"Drink this, Desmond. It wil help."

He did. I waited for her to mention the medicine, but she didn't say a word. My father didn't give any indication that he tasted anything other than water.

Did he know that there was pain medication in his water? She'd been taking care of him for a while, so I guessed it would be expected.

But why had she jumped when I caught her mixing it into the water earlier? Why had her hand been shaking?

"Thank you," he said when he was done. "I'm so lucky to have had you near me ever since this horrible il ness began, Elizabeth."

She stroked his forehead. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Elizabeth returned to the castle before you got sick?" I asked.

"Yes," my father said. "I don't know what I would have done without her."

Elizabeth squeezed his hand. "I only wish I could ease your pain, brother."

His attention returned to me and he looked at the vial I wore on the chain around my neck. "Why haven't you drunk the potion yet? I thought it was what you wanted."

"I wanted to see you again."

He managed a very smal smile at that. "Even when I'm stuck in this form?"

191

I nodded. His demon form was a fearsome thing, and at first glance anyone would assume that he was a monster, but I now knew that he wasn't. As he'd

said to me yesterday, he was the same man underneath, no matter what outer form he took. I had no doubt that my father was a good man, even though

he was also a demon.

It sounded completely crazy, but I believed it.

I wasn't afraid of him. I hadn't known him for my entire life, but I knew at that moment that I loved him. I loved my father so much and I didn't want him to die.

My eyes burned with tears. I'd seen him one last time. I'd done what I wanted. I'd shown him that I wasn't afraid of him--I didn't want the last time he saw me

to have been last night when I screamed because I was afraid of how he looked.

Now the only thing I was afraid of was losing him before I got the chance to even get to know him.

I cleared my throat and looked around the room. "The pictures. Where did you get them?"

"I painted them myself. My memories of being in the human realm are stil very vivid. I wanted to remember what I'd seen."

"And the one of my mother?"

"I painted that one as wel ." His eyes moved to it. "I can stil see her when I close my eyes, as if I was with her only yesterday."

Just then, his face convulsed and he clutched at his stomach. The veins and muscles in his neck bulged. He was in pain but wasn't crying out this time.

Was it because I

192

was in the room next to him? Did he not want me to see how much agony he was in? Was he holding in the scream so it wouldn't scare me? I felt like

sobbing for him, for his pain, and for everything he was going through.

Why wasn't the pain medication Elizabeth gave him working? Was it too late?

When he settled down he met my gaze again. "I'm sorry, Nikki," his voice rasped. "For al of this."

I shook my head and clutched on to his hand tighter. "Don't be sorry."

He turned to Elizabeth. "May I have some more water?"

"Of course." She poured more and brought it to him again, holding it up so he could drink. He was so weak he could barely swal ow.

I knew then that Elizabeth was right. He had only hours left. Perhaps not even that long.

Michael's expression was tense. "I'l get more water." "No, I wil ." Elizabeth absently touched the smal bottle she wore around her neck and I took a good, close look at it.

It
was
the same bottle as yesterday. I was sure of it. Why would perfume and pain medicine be in the exact same bottle? Why would they be the exact same color?

My thoughts churned together in a big confusing mass as I tried to make sense of everything I'd seen and heard. It felt like there was an answer there-something I was missing. Something that would make sense of everything.

Michael,
I projected telepathical y.
Does my aunt control everything that my father drinks or eats?

193

There was a pause. ::As far as I know. After she sent the rest of the servants away, no one else was here to do it. And she doesn't let me do anything.::

She sent the servants away? She told me that my father did that.

::No, it was her decision. I was only able to stay because the king insisted.::