Purgatorio (40 page)
Authors: Dante
III. Satisfaction
Postlude: the eyes and smile of Beatrice
‘O you on the far side of the sacred stream,’
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turning the point of her words on me
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that had seemed sharp enough when I felt their edge,
she then went on without a pause: ‘Say it,
say if this is true. To such an accusation
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your confession must be joined.’
My faculties were so confounded
that my voice struggled up but spent itself
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before it made its way out of my mouth.
For a moment she held back, then asked:
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‘What are you thinking? Speak, for your memories
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of sin have not been washed away by water yet.’
Confusion and fear, mixed together,
drove from my mouth a
yes
—
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but one had need of eyes to hear it.
As a crossbow breaks with too much tension
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from the pulling taut of cord and bow
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so that the arrow strikes the target with less force,
thus I collapsed beneath that heavy load
and, with a flood of tears and sighs,
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my voice came strangled from my throat.
At that she said to me: ‘In your desire for me
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that guided you to love that good
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beyond which there is nothing left to long for,
‘what ditches or what chains did you encounter
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across your path to make you cast aside
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all hope of going forward?
‘And what profit or advantage showed
in the face of other things so that you felt
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you must parade yourself before them?’
After heaving a bitter sigh
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I hardly had the voice to give the answer
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my lips were laboring to shape.
In tears, I said: ‘Things set in front of me,
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with their false delights, turned back my steps
‘Had you stayed silent or denied what you confess,’
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she said, ‘your fault would not be any less apparent
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since it is known to such a Judge.
‘But when a man’s own blushing cheek reveals
the condemnation of his sin, in our high court
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the grindstone dulls the sharp edge of the sword.
‘Nonetheless, so that you now may bear
the shame of your straying and the next time
‘stop sowing tears and listen.
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Then you shall hear just how my buried flesh
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should have directed you to quite a different place.
‘Never did art or nature set before you beauty
as great as in the lovely members that enclosed me,
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now scattered and reduced to dust.
‘And if the highest beauty failed you
in my death, what mortal thing
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should then have drawn you to desire it?
‘Indeed, at the very first arrow
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of deceitful things, you should have risen up
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and followed me who was no longer of them.
‘You should not have allowed your wings to droop,
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leaving you to other darts from some young girl
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or other novelty of such brief use.
‘The fledgling may allow even a third attempt,
but all in vain is the net flung or arrow shot
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in sight of a full-fledged bird.’
As children in their shame stand mute, their eyes
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upon the ground, listening,
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acknowledging their fault, repentant,
just so I stood. And then she said: ‘Now that
you are grieved by what you hear, lift up your beard
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and you shall have more grief from what you see.’
With less resistance is the sturdy oak
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torn from the earth, whether by our northern wind
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or by the one that blows from Iarbas’ lands,
than was my chin nudged up by her command.
When by my beard she sought my face
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I recognized the venom in her words.
And when I had raised my head
my eyes saw that those first-created beings
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had paused in scattering their flowers
and, my vision blurred and still uncertain,
saw Beatrice turning toward the beast
Even beneath her veil, even beyond the stream,
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she seemed to surpass her former self in beauty
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more than she had on earth surpassed all others.
The nettle of remorse so stung me then
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that whatever else had lured me most to loving
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had now become for me most hateful.
Such knowledge of my fault was gnawing at my heart
that I was overcome, and what I then became
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she knows who was the reason for my state.
Then, when my heart restored my vital signs,
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I saw the lady I first found alone above me,
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saying: ‘Hold on to me and hold me fast!’
She drew me into the river up to my throat
and, pulling me along behind her, moved
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upon the water as lightly as a skiff.
When I had come close to the blessèd shore
I heard
‘Asperges me’
so sweetly sung
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that I cannot recall nor write it down.
The lovely lady spread her arms,
then clasped my head, and plunged me under,
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where I was forced to swallow water.
Then she drew me out and led me, bathed,
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into the dance of the four lovely ladies
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as each one raised an arm above my head.
‘Here we are nymphs and in heaven we are stars.
Before Beatrice descended to the world
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we were ordained to serve her as her handmaids.
‘We will bring you to her eyes. But to receive
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the joyous light they hold, the other three,
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who look much deeper into things, shall sharpen yours.’
Thus they began their song and then
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they took me to the griffin’s breast,
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where Beatrice stood and faced us.
They said: ‘Do not withhold your gaze.
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We have placed you here before the emeralds
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from which, some time ago, Love shot his darts.’
A thousand desires hotter than any flame
bound my eyes to those shining eyes,
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which still stayed fixed upon the griffin.
Even as the sun in a mirror, not otherwise
the twofold beast shone forth in them,
