Positively Yours (27 page)

‘Oh my God! Yes, of course you can,' she said, smiling.

John looked so relieved. His face had been so pale and worried when he'd arrived, but now Erin could immediately see some colour come back to it.

She knew they still had a lot of things to sort out and talk about, but she just couldn't hold her news in any longer.

‘I'm pregnant.'

John dropped his coffee cup on to the ground. The china shattered, the coffee spilt all over the tiles. For a moment neither he nor Erin spoke.

‘What did you say?' he finally spluttered out.

Erin began laughing, all the day's worries and tension now transformed into extreme happiness.

‘I'm pregnant. We're having a baby. That's if you still want one?'

‘Want one? I want twenty! Oh my God, this is amazing,' and with that John stepped over the coffee disaster and wrapped his arms tightly around his wife.

‘I love you. I hated fighting, let's not do that again,' he whispered.

Erin started crying, she was so overcome. Suddenly John pulled away.

‘But how can you be pregnant? I thought we had missed the right time that weekend you were sick.'

‘I thought we had, too, but it must have happened the night of Amy's hen.'

‘That night?' he asked, surprised. He began laughing. ‘All those months of cutting back on alcohol, and then we go and
conceive our first child on the night you were literally on the floor drunk!'

‘Don't tell anyone that!' Erin said, playfully hitting him on the arm. ‘The poor child could be damaged for life!'

John placed his hand on Erin's flat belly.

‘My child is fine, no, he's better than fine. He's a miracle,' and with that they both sat down and began talking about the best thing that had ever happened to them.

Erin knew they both had problems to work out, and that she had narrowly missed losing her husband and marriage, but for tonight there was just one thing on her mind, the baby. And for the first time in two months the house was full of energy, noise and life. As they discussed hospitals, doctors and baby names Erin felt her whole body relax. Right here in the room she had everything she needed – her husband and her baby. She had never felt so lucky in all her life.

‘
BUT I WANT
to stay close to my family,' said Grace Miller, as she sat on the edge of the bed, attempting to put her second shoe on. Her massive belly made it almost impossible to bend over. The runner lay on the ground. It would be a miracle if it made it on to her feet.

‘We're our own family,' replied Ethan. ‘And soon there will be three of us.'

‘OK, I know, but I just want to be close to my mum, and the boys.'

‘Your mum drives you mad! I think she's sweet, but you're the one always glad to wave her off at the airport after a visit.'

Grace felt hurt. What Ethan was saying wasn't entirely true: her mum could be a bit overwhelming and tiring, but Grace did love and care for her. And the last few months in Ireland had changed their relationship. Yes, Patsy could still interfere a little too much, but Grace couldn't imagine life without her.

‘Listen, I know you want to have your mum around after the baby arrives, and that's fine. I'm so busy with work that it's good that you'll have some extra support for the first few months, but, Grace, my job and our home are back in San Diego. And we do need to go back. That was always the plan.'

‘Well, we didn't plan on getting pregnant. Plans change.'

Now Ethan didn't know what to say. Instead he walked over to his wife, bent down on one knee, and, like Prince Charming, put her shoe on her foot. He leant in and kissed Grace.

‘I love you, and I want you to be happy, but we can't just suddenly change our plans on a whim. I know you're nervous about coping after the baby arrives, but we'll be fine. We have a good life back home, and once my work here is finished we can head back, baby in tow. It will be great. And your mum can visit as much as she wants.'

Grace said nothing.

‘OK, well, I've got to go to work. I can pick you up later and we can go and get the cot. I know the superstitious Irish in you would rather wait until the baby is born, but I can't stand not being organized! We have a lot to buy, and we need to get cracking. You should go back to bed, relax,' he added, as he walked out the door.

Grace wished Ethan goodbye, but didn't want to go back to bed. She was bored of lying down. Her bump was increasing daily, and she just couldn't sleep with it. Of course it was reassuring to feel Baby Miller, but his nightly dance routines were keeping her awake. While he (or she) partied, Grace sat wide awake. Her mind was constantly racing with the decisions she and Ethan had to make. Over the last few weeks she had tried broaching the subject of staying in Ireland permanently, but he just hadn't taken her seriously. He thought she was simply anxious about the baby; he didn't know that as every day passed she became more and more certain she wanted to stay at home in Ireland. She wanted Dublin to be her baby's home.

I should have married an Irish guy, she thought, as she walked into the kitchen, sat down with a bowl of cornflakes and turned on her laptop. Grace was bored. She knew she
was lucky that with Ethan's salary she didn't have to work, but there was only so much maternity wear she could buy, or so many friends she could meet for coffee, and so many times she could discuss baby names with her mum. Grace opened her inbox, and checked her emails. There was one from her brother-in-law. He had sent her some new photos of Coco playing in his back garden. Coco looked so happy, but his collar was a little frayed. Grace decided to send him a present of a new one. She went online to her favourite dog store, chose a cute pirate-themed collar and ordered it to be sent to Matt's house.

She looked at the huge choice and variety of doggy apparel, gifts and toys, and thought how no one in Ireland offered anything like it. It was the same with baby gifts; compared to Ireland, America had every colour, size and style imaginable. There just wasn't the same range of stuff over here, and most of her favourite US shops didn't even ship to Ireland. Suddenly Grace had an idea. I should set up my own website, one that will sell the coolest and best baby and dog gifts, she thought. I can buy the supplies from all the shops I love in San Diego, get them sent to me here, and then I can sell and post them on to Irish customers. My God, it would be such fun! she thought. And I could do it from home, sitting in my maternity pyjamas! People could have the baby pumpkin outfit, or the dog tutu they had always dreamed of. She sat up in her chair, she felt so excited. I could do this, she thought.

Grace spent the rest of the day on the internet or on the phone. She looked up how to set up a website, the cheapest way to import goods, how much it would all cost. With her marketing background she had many ideas on how to promote and publicize a website. By 5 p.m. she was sure this was what she wanted to do. It had been her most productive day in a long time. She actually looked forward to the work. But Grace
didn't know how to tell Ethan. Setting up this Irish website would confirm that she wanted to stay in Ireland, and that was something she knew he hadn't bought into yet. I won't tell him at once, she thought. I'll do some more work on it and see how it all pans out before letting him know.

FOR THE NEXT
few days Grace looked forward to getting up each morning and sitting down to look at stock she could order, from puppy raincoats to baby Ugg boots. Everything was so different and cute.

On Saturday she met a group of friends for lunch and decided to let them in on her secret idea.

‘I think it sounds great,' said her old neighbour, Cathy.

‘The fact that you're so excited about baby clothes is good enough for me,' said Sharon, who was delighted by Grace's new-found obsession with all things baby.

‘Well, I don't think I would want my dog to be dressed like Superman, or anything!' said Aisling. ‘But the doggy toys and beds look really great. I think you should go for it.'

‘And it'll mean you can work from home,' added Sharon, who as a mum herself was being very practical about the whole situation.

‘OK,' said Grace. ‘I'm going to do it!'

The girls all cheered.

‘Now you'll all have to promise to buy things from the website!' Grace warned.

They promised, and before long they were discussing names for the website. Everyone seemed to have very different opinions. The only time I'm not thinking up a name for my
baby I'm fretting over naming something else! thought Grace, laughing.

Grace felt like she was going to an interview. As she watched the clock tick, she sat nervously in her kitchen. Suddenly she heard the sound of the large wooden security gates to their rented house open, and saw Ethan's BMW drive in. As he drove over the gravel Grace once again checked the kitchen table. It was covered in printouts, catalogues and website designs. She had spent the last couple of weeks perfecting her idea for her baby and doggy website. She was sure that it was going to be a hit with parents and dog-owners alike. She hadn't said anything to Ethan until she knew she was going to go ahead with it, and that staying in Ireland was what she wanted. And she was now certain about both.

Ethan walked in the front door and took off his suit jacket. Through his Ralph Lauren blue shirt she could see his toned body. He ran his fingers through his blond hair. Grace still found him as attractive as the first day she'd met him.

‘Hi, how are you feeling?' he asked as he kissed her.

‘I'm fine. The baby seems to be trying out for the Olympics, though, there's been non-stop kicking, turning, rolling and elbow-nudging all day!'

Ethan laughed as he fetched a beer from the fridge. He worked long hours and still went to the gym on the way home, but he did like to indulge himself sometimes with an after-work beer, especially on a warm evening like tonight.

‘What's all this?' he asked, sitting at the large oak table.

‘It's my new idea. My plan. My new career,' she said all at once. She didn't know why she felt so nervous.

‘What?' he asked. And so Grace sat down and began to explain her ideas.

Ethan was impressed.

‘This would be easy to set up, and good fun, too. And you're
right, America is the land of choice and variety! And people would love to get easy access to some of that stuff over here.'

Grace smiled.

‘You should do it,' he said enthusiastically. ‘And I can help you,' he added.

Grace hugged him.

‘And the great thing about it being a website, and not a shop, is that when we move back to San Diego in a few months you can still operate from there. That's the advantage of the worldwide web!'

Grace's heart sank.

‘Well, that's the thing. I want to work at it from here.'

Ethan put down the baby clothes catalogue, and said nothing.

‘I don't want to move back. I want us to live here. To bring up our baby here.'

‘Grace, I thought we had been through this?'

‘No, we haven't,' she replied, trying to keep the tone of her voice steady. ‘You kept saying you wanted to go back, but I'm saying I don't.'

Ethan loosened his shirt and stared right at Grace. His blue eyes seemed to bore through her.

‘You knew this trip was only for a year,' he said. ‘The Dublin office needs me until they get off the ground. But my real job and career is back home. Are you asking me to give that up?'

‘No, of course not,' she replied. ‘But maybe you could continue running the Dublin office?'

‘It's not that easy,' he said. ‘And it's not just about work. My family and friends are back home. My life is there. You're asking me to give it all up to live here for ever?'

‘I did it for you many years ago,' she said, the tone in her voice changing.

‘That was different. You were dying to get out of Ireland,
away from Dublin. I've enjoyed my time here, but my heart is back home.'

‘I thought your heart was with me?' she asked.

Neither of them said anything.

‘That's not what I meant, you know that,' he replied eventually. ‘You know I would do anything for you, and for our child. But you're asking so much from me.'

As she looked at Ethan's face, so full of worry and woe, she felt bad. She knew his home was California, not Dublin, but what else could she do? She was really sure she had to stay in Ireland.

Ethan poured himself another beer. Grace looked enviously at the alcohol.

‘Do you want a sip?' he offered. She declined. She only had another few weeks to wait.

‘I thought you liked our life back home? Weren't you happy?'

‘What? No, that's not it. You know how happy I was. Having our wonderful house, our good friends, being able to walk to the beach, having every kind of shop, restaurant and service at our doorstep was perfect. I wouldn't alter one second of it. But our life is changing. We won't be a carefree couple any more, and much as I'd like to think the baby won't change our life, I know it will. San Diego represents our life before all of this, and it was amazing. But I think our future should be here in Dublin.'

‘And does my opinion count?' he asked, raising his voice.

‘Of course, we need to work out what's best for us all. But I do desperately want to stay in Ireland. We can visit your family, and our friends, as much as possible. The baby will be half-American so it's entitled to see as much of its other home as it can. It will be a little traveller! But I want us to be based here.'

Ethan stood up.

‘You're asking me to change my whole life for ever,' he said. And with that he walked out of the door.

Grace sat there as she heard the front door slam. He was gone.

Ethan was normally a very calm person. He was enthusiastic and energetic, but he rarely lost his head. Grace was worried.