Pole Position (12 page)

Jet
****

“JET, get those god damn tear offs put on my helmet NOW, or so help me god son..” my dad yelled. 

I had been going to the races for as long as I could remember.  I loved going, I lived for the weekends when my uncles would pull up in the pulling rig with dads car loaded in the enclosed trailer.  Mom, my brother and I would load up and ride in the living quarters of the trailer.  Some say that had to be horrible but, it was like a miniature apartment back there equipped with heat, air condition, and water.  My mom refused to ride in the semi with the guys, because my uncles and my dad always fought about how he wasn’t supposed to drink before he raced.  He never listened to them though, he would wake up on Saturday morning and have a tall glass of Jack Daniels for breakfast. 

I was seven years old, my brother was nine years old, but we knew more about race cars than most adults did.  We also knew that it wasn’t safe to race drunk, so did my mom. 

“Nathan, please don’t go out there, you’re going to kill somebody or yourself.” My mom pleaded with dad. 

“You shut the fuck up, get the stop watch
, your little pen and paper and time me.” He yelled as he cracked open another beer.  Mom shook her head and walked over to the cabinet, she put the stop watch around her neck and was just grabbing her pen and paper when dad walked up behind her.  “You better keep your fucking mouth shut about me having a beer or two before I race, I do it to calm my nerves.  That fucking Jimmy should try it, maybe he could drive a line instead of pulling bullshit slide jobs on all of us.  I race him, just like he races me, I will eventually get my point across even if it means putting him on his lid.” He said then let go of her arm.  My mom nodded her head then walked away from him.  Dad walked over to me ,“How many did you put on?” he asked then took a drink of his beer, smashed the can with his hand and threw it to the front of the trailer. 

“Twelve dad.” I told him

“You idiot look at that track do you really think twelve tear offs will last? Put at least sixteen on.” He said throwing the tear off box at me making sure it hit the side of my head, and walked out of the trailer mumbling how stupid his kids and wife were. 

Mom walked over to me and rubbed the side of my head where dad had
hit me with the box she kissed it, “I’m sorry sweetie, I wish he wouldn’t drink.  I don’t know what has gotten into him, he’s just fighting some kind of demon.  We just need to pray that he will get through this stage without getting hurt or hurting anybody else.” She told me. 

The track official came over the P.A. system announcing it was time for the A-Modifides to line up for the heat races, “I’m in the second one right?” dad yelled into the trailer to ask mom. 

“Yes, right next to Jimmy.” Mom told him. 

Dad reached down, yanked his helmet out of my hands
, “There better be sixteen on here, if I run out I’m whooping your ass boy.” Dad told me. 

“Please don’t talk to him like that Nathan.  There are sixteen I counted to make sure.” She said then held her hand out to me so we could start walking to the pit grand stands. 

I looked over at Jimmy’s trailer, I didn’t see the little black haired girl there though, when we got to the grandstands I looked around but she wasn’t there.  “Mom, I don’t see Jimmy’s daughter here, you know the one with the long black hair in pig tails.”

She looked around
, “Hmm, that’s weird, maybe she’s sick or something.”

“That’s not fair dad makes us come when we are sick.” I told her. 

I always watched Jimmy and his daughter, they were always so happy and laughing, Jimmy would walk around the pits with her on his shoulders and his wife holding his hand.  Not my dad though, he made us come to the races but we only went where he said we could, to the pit grandstands and back. “You can’t trust anybody at the track so just mind your own business and don’t talk to anybody.” He would tell my brother Jason and I. 

The heat race started, Jimmy and my dad were lined up beside each other towards the middle of the pack.  Jimmy had a faster car than my dad, so my dad would get right up on Jimmy’s rear bumper and try to push him, but Jimmy would pull away.  When Jimmy go
t too high on the track my dad dove to the bottom of the track but Jimmy still pulled ahead of dad.  With it only being ten laps for a heat race Jimmy finished second and my dad finished third.  One of my uncles running the video camera looked at mom, “He needs to quit drinking, he drives like a damn idiot out there.” He said then started walking towards the trailer.  Mom held my hand as we walked across the pit area, I looked over at Jimmy’s trailer again but the only people there were his pit crew waiting for him. 

When we got back to dad’s trailer, mom was just hanging her stop watch up when dad came barreling
into the pit stall.  He revved the engine a few times then shut the car off.  Dad hastily unbuckled his belts, took the steering wheel off and threw it on the decking beside him, then his helmet he slammed onto the decking so hard it rolled out the window.  “That god damn asshole needs to learn how to drive, he can’t hold the same fucking line for one god damn lap.” He yelled as he got out of the car. 

“Boys, go watch TV in the bunk area while daddy calms down.” Mom told my brother and me
and shuffled us to the front of the trailer.  Just as we sat down my dad threw the door open;

“I don’t bring you brats here so you can watch T.V., get out there and start scraping the mud off and put sixteen more tear off on my helmet.” Dad yelled then slammed the door.  As we walked past dad in the trailer he was pouring clear liquid into his pop bottle. 

Mom walked up to him, “Nathan stop drinking please, you’re going to get hurt or hurt somebody out there.” She pleaded with him. 

He pushed her away with his forearm as he took a long drink from the pop bottle.  “Awwww Vodka and coke, the winner’s choice.” He said with an evil grin. 

Jason and I scraped mud off the car as the pit crew, my uncles, changed tires and straightened body panels out. 

“God damn it Karen, I can’t fucking eat chicken salad sandwiches on race day you know that.” Dad yelled at our mom.  Mom grabbed her purse and told us to follow her to the concession stand.  As we were standing in line behind
some of the drivers, I looked around at the pit concession stand.  Jimmy was just un-wrapping his food when we walked over to start putting stuff on our cheeseburgers.  He looked over at mom “Well hello Karen, hello boys”  he said then grabbed the ketchup and some pickles for his hamburger. 

“H
ello Jimmy, how are you doing?  Where’s that beautiful little girl and Alice at this evening?” she asked then handed each of us a cheeseburger.

“Alice had to stay home with Chassis, she come down with the chicken pox then had a nasty allergic reaction to the antibiotic the doctor gave her.  Needless to say I have a very mad little girl at home.” He told her with a laugh. 

“Oh no!  Well tell Alice and the little one hello from me and the boys.” She told Jimmy.  He smiled “Will do, have a good night.” He told us. 

We got back to the trailer, dad was standing in the big door way with his arms crossed over his chest glaring at mom. 

“Did I just see you talking to that non driving piece of shit?” he snarled out. 

She handed him his cheeseburger
, “I simply asked how his little girl and wife are since they aren’t here this evening.” Mom told him, then started to walk away.  He grabbed her by her upper arm and pushed her against the side of the trailer;

“I don’t fucking bring you here for god damn social hour KAREN.  I could give two fucks less about his wife and little girl.”

He let go of her arm to take a bite of his cheeseburger, “ONIONS?” he yelled, then threw his cheeseburger on the ground and yanked mine out of my hands.  He unwrapped it, took a bite, “Your mom has went stupid, I don’t eat onions when I have a race coming up.” Dad grumbled as he continued to eat. 

“Nathan now I have to go get Jet another one, why couldn’t you just give it to me to pick the one onion off?” she said as she started to walk away from the trailer. 

Dad pulled her back by her arm causing her to stumble backwards and almost fall.  “Why can’t you quit fucking talking to people and fucking pay attention and remember shit?” he asked as he continued to walk her towards the bunk area. 

They walked in, dad slammed the door behind them.  I heard him yelling at her, Jason grabbed me and pulled me away so I couldn’t hear anymore.  We ran as fast as we could to the concession stand
, “Hurry up so dad doesn’t catch us.” He told me.  Luckily there was nobody in line so we bought me another cheeseburger and ran back to the trailer.  I could still her dad yelling at mom about talking to Jimmy, “Hurry and eat that so he doesn’t get mad.” Jason whispered to me.  I was just about half way done when dad came walking out of the bunk area, he grabbed the bottle from earlier and took two large drinks empting the liquid out of the bottle.  I quietly wrapped my food up and hid it behind a tire inside the trailer. 

Dad walked by Jason and
me, “You two brats better not act like her or so help me god..” he said then walked off. 

Sometime later they called for the modified A-main feature to line up, dad staggered over to his car, then climbed in.  My uncle helped him get the belts tight and put his window net up.
“You know you shouldn’t be racing god damn it Nate.” My uncle said staring at dad through the window net.  I couldn’t hear what dad said but my uncle shook his head and walked back to the trailer. Mom was still in the bunk area, so when dad pulled away my uncles, Jason and I went to check on her.  She was sitting in a chair with a fat bloody bottom lip, red marks on her arms and some around her throat.  “Jesus Christ, what did he do to you?” My uncles asked then walked towards her.  She shook her head as her shoulders shook from her crying. 

“Just go, I’ll be fine, I’ll be there in a few minutes.” She told us.  My uncles turned us aroun
d and shuffled us out the door;

“I’m going to beat the hell out of him, he might be my brother but I’m fed up with this crap.” Uncle Nick said to my other uncles. 

As we walked to the pit grand stands I looked over to see Jimmy as he was getting ready to climb in his car.  He handed his helmet to a guy then climbed in the car.  They looked at the helmet and laughed, I could see glittery stickers and writing all over the helmet.  I stopped and stared at Jimmy as he fastened his belts, looked at the helmet and smiled before putting it on.  My brother yanked me by the arm “You can’t stop like that little man you’ll get hit by a car.”

“Did you see Jimmy’s helmet? It’s got stickers and writing all over i
t.”

He laughed, “D
on’t get any ideas our dad would kill you if you put more than just tear offs on his helmet.  Jimmy’s girl sure decorated his helmet for him though.” He told me as we sat down and waited for the race to start. 

Mom walked up a few minutes later, I could still see the cut on her lip but she had a hoody on to cover her arms and neck.  Uncle Nick turned and looked at her and shook his head
, “I’m sorry Karen, I don’t know what’s gotten into him, I’ll have a talk with him tomorrow.” He told her. 

She nodded her head
, “He’s drinking a lot more lately, it’s getting out of hand.  I don’t like him racing when he’s like this.”

“He’s going to end up
wrecking, I just hope he doesn’t hurt anybody else in the process.” Nick said to mom.

The fireworks shot off as the announcer called each drivers name over the intercom, Jimmy was two cars ahead of dad.  When the green flag dropped and the cars roared out of turn four, my skin was covered in goose bumps.  This is what I loved, the sounds the smell and the excitement.  The race was going good until dad was ri
ght behind Jimmy, he would ram into the back bumper of his car trying to break Jimmy loose.  When dad was finally able to pull up and race side by side with Jimmy, dad would push Jimmy up against the top of the track and barely give him room to squeeze by the front straight away wall.  Sparks flew off the body of Jimmy’s car each time they went by the wall.  The flagman rolled up the black flag and pointed it at dad and shook his head no at the two drivers.  A couple of laps later they stopped the race and went over to dad and Jimmy to talk to them.  I seen Jimmy’s hands come off the steering wheel and my dad shake his head no at the other official.  The race resumed, dad stayed away from Jimmy and quit pushing him around for a couple of laps.  Then when Jimmy pulled out ahead of dad in turn two down the back stretch, it must have made dad mad.  As they went through turns dad pushed higher on the track until he was pinching Jimmy off again.  “Damn it Nathan just drive the damn car!” my uncle yelled as they flew down the front stretch.  Jimmy wasn’t giving up his line though, as they went through turns one and two he was just barely in front of dad.  Down the back stretch dad tried to turn up into Jimmy’s back bumper but Jimmy pulled far enough ahead for the lead.  Through turn three dad pushed up again, then turn four and the wall came.  Dad never turned back down he just kept his foot on the gas and his wheels turn towards Jimmy’s car.  Sparks flew, one of Jimmy’s body panels came off, and he started rolling down the front straight away until the car come to rest at the bottom of the track.  The flagman turned the red lights on and threw the red flag, stopping the race.  “Oh my god!” mom gasped and covered her mouth.