Personal Experiences (3 page)

I giggled, "Ninety-eight seriously? I think you're being a little ridiculous" I stated as I held my thumb and index finger close demonstrating to him a little. "I wouldn't make plans that far ahead there, Mr. Fullback for Georgia State. You never know what might happen."

"What did I tell you when we were in second grade, darlin? I meant what I said." He pulled his hand up from the water and tracked it across my cheek. I draped my arms over his shoulders and hugged him tightly while laying my chin on his shoulder watching the shore and our friends get smaller and smaller. Just thinking about how peaceful this was, hearing the water splash against us while he was walking. Trevor pushed his shoulder up to get my attention and I raised my head back up to him.

"So beautiful, Babe."

"TJ" I whispered. I knew where this was going to lead to and I didn't want to talk about it. He always brought this up when we had a moment to ourselves and I really didn't even want to think about getting engaged. It wasn't that I didn't want to spend the rest of my life with him; I planned on it. My problem was, I wasn't really one for marriage. I always thought just because you loved someone what was a piece of paper going to do to make that love grow any stronger? Besides, I had lived with my daddy's marriage to Mona and that piece of paper did not strengthen that bond whatsoever. I was totally happy with the way things were and would continue to be happy as long as I was with TJ. Right now in life we had to concentrate on school. I didn't want anything to come between our goals, and that's where this conversation was headed, straight down the middle.

"Damn baby, what am I going to do with just seeing you on the holidays? It's gonna be a bitch! I can't stand the thought of it."

Yep, I knew it!

Tensing up my spine, I wanted this to be over before it began. "TJ, stop!"

"Elle, we have to talk about it sometime."

Beginning to tighten my body now, I started to feel frustration rise up from inside of me. I unhooked my legs from around him and attempted to touch the bottom of the lake, I wasn't even close! "No, not now, we still have time before Rachel and I have to leave and I don't want this weekend ruined".

"Elle, it's not like I'm saying run off and get married right now. I'm just thinkin' of an engagement."

"Trevor, you know how I feel about this and I'm not talking about it now." I shook my head vehemently. "First off; I'm not wanting either of us tied down to something that might eventually fail. Second we're both only eighteen. Third, we are going to attain what we want; I'm going to be a doctor and you're going to be a corporate raider."

I was not talking about this, was he crazy? Not only did he have so much to offer to others, he had opportunities that had been presented to him on a silver platter. The time for him to be married or even engaged and tied down to a girl was not now, no matter how much we fought about it, this was not happening. I would not change my mind on this subject. He didn't know what the future held for him, he could have a national scout come to one of his games and potentially end up playing for the NFL, I was not about to keep him from that.

I heard the aggravated breath that came out of his mouth. He was trying relentlessly to keep his composure about this. "Ok first off, it's an investor, not a corporate raider. Second, it won't fa-"waving my hand in a circular motion I cut him off from what I knew was a statement he couldn't be positively sure of. "Toe-may-toe, toe-mah-toe, same thing, personal experiences have taught me not to change a good thing, ya know?"

"Elle-"

Losing patience, I began to yell louder "No, Trevor! We're good, we're solid right? Bendable…not breakable."

"Babe!"

Grabbing his face, I was holding his cheeks in my hands. I wanted eye contact so that he would see I was not budging on this. "Please Sweetie, please! Not now. Let's enjoy this weekend, we're together, let's be together."

"Fuck!" There, I knew I had won this battle, but the war was far from over. If only he could see things my way. "Ok…fine, but we're not done with this. This discussion is far from finished."

I didn't want to agree or disagree, so I totally ignored what he had said. I turned towards him and resumed my position around his waist and told him what always made everything better.

"Love you, baby."

Smiling, he told me those beautiful words; "Love you too."

He touched his lips to mine. The kiss deepened, his tongue touched the crease of my lips as if silently letting me know he wanted access inside. I allowed him in. He went in deep to explore my mouth. Tasting TJ on my tongue was as tasting the sweetest sugar straight from the cane. Feeling his arms tighten around me rendered me defenseless but extremely loved. for I knew I needed no defenses around him since I was safe from everything and everyone. As his arms squeezed my legs tightened. I heard a low moan deep down in his chest.

I continued with my actions to see if I could achieve more of those impulsive sounds. I loved hearing him moan and breathe my name. Slowly, I lowered my hands from around his neck sliding them gently over his back feeling every muscle flex as I ran my smooth touch down to the top of his swim trunks. Lazily, I lowered my hands over his rigid backside. I ultimately received my reward of a deeper, vigorous groan.

His hands explored my new bikini top, well actually, what my bikini top was covering as he slowly slid one triangle of my top slightly to the side and slid his thumb over my nipple.

"Damn, get a fuckin room ya'll! Them fish are runnin for cover, aint no one up here wanna see live porn at the lake, especially when it's my best friend and my best friend's woman!" Bear squawked.

Laughing exploded out from the shoreline. I know I must've turned ten shades of red. I lowered my face down in the crook of TJ's neck. I didn't want to look at him or any of them.

Lilly and Curt were laughing and whooping beside them like they were appreciating every minute of it. I saw Rachel raise her hands and cup them up to her mouth as she screamed in disgust "Ewwhhh, that's fuckin' gross, Elle! I don't wanna talk about my cousin's sex life lil' lone watch it."

I felt TJ's chest vibrating so I knew he was laughing silently. I imagined he was rolling his eyes as he started back towards the shore.

He was breathing fast "I'm glad we stopped because I'm gonna have a hard time getting out of this water without embarrassin' myself."

Snickering, I grabbed the front of his trunks and agreed. I let go of him and swam back to the shore. As I got to knee level water, I stood and replied to Bear since he decided to fuck up my moment.

"Oh Bear, don't be jealous you aint getting none of this!" I took my hands and ran them down the curves of my body while following them with my eyes. Bear's eyes got rather large as I went to act like I was going to put my fingers down the front of my bottoms and quickly pulled up my hand and flashed him a bird. Everyone on the shore busted out in laughter again as I began walking again.

"The fuck she say to me?" He mumbled. "I'll have you know, Elleny Jean, I don't need none of that," his arm flew up through the air and pointed at me. "I knock the bottom out of it daily" he replied as he began thrusting back and forth.

Walking out of the water up to shore, TJ laughed; "Well, now there's something I could've gone through life without seein'." I was laughing hysterically.

I heard Rachel gasp as she removed her sunglasses, mouth gaping open, she laid into him. "Willie Bob Jackson, I can't believe you just said that out loud." Curling up her top lip, she got a repulsed look on her face "and what the hell was that humpin' thing you were doin? I mean…for fuck's sake?"

Curtis finally caught his breath and spoke, which must've meant he was pretty shit-faced. Normally, Curt didn't join in on the ruckus, he would just sit back and watch the rest of us make asses out of ourself "Rach, if he fucks like he humps air girl, I know why you have toys."

Oh yeah, he was shit-faced.

As a matter of fact, I think his shit-faced was shit-faced for him to come up with that one. The air around the shore became so thick you couldn't see four feet in front of you. Silence had built a fence around us and no one knew where to find the gate to get the fuck out. Bear's face turned to stone while Rachel's turned pale then the prettiest shade of red. Lilly broke the silence by screeching Curtis' name.

Rachel glared at Lilly through eyes that possibly, at that moment could have committed murder themselves. "I can't believe you told him, Lilly. I told you that in secret."

Bear yelped in horror "What the fuck!"

Rachel stood from her seat and swiftly materialized in front of Bear grabbing a hold of his arm and struggled to get her arms to wrap around him. Her voice had now changed from demonic to an obnoxious whiny beg, like a child who walked past a toy store and pleaded to go in. "Bear Baby, come'ere." I rolled my eyes and thought to myself, oh god, here we go.

"You told her about our…our…private life?"

At this point, all you could hear was the muffling and snorting of laughs that we attempted to withhold because we were doing a terrible job at hiding them…except for Curtis, who was laughing his ass off.

"Bear, honey…" Rachel said struggling to pacify him, pointing back at Lilly, she continued. "I told her in confidence, like a sister…" Rachel gnashed her teeth as her eyes protruded from their sockets. "…a sister I'm gonna strangle, Baby."

He knew we talked. I mean come on, we are girls and best friends; we talked about everything. All three of us discussed our sex life. We all had toys and we all chatted about using them. Don't get me wrong, we didn't go into detail but we talked. Hell, we drove an hour to another town together to purchase our vibrators just so we didn't run into anyone we knew. We gossiped about shit like this to find out which of our men were more adventurous in bed. Finding out that Bear and Rachel used toys together, which she did not ever mention to us, I had a feeling her man was the winner.

Finally, I'd had enough, I tried to make an effort to calm Bear "Bear, it's ok, it's no big deal, Darlin'…it's totally fine." he was quickly pacing back and forth, either trying to talk himself down or just talking to himself about what… I had no fucking clue but it seemed the latter. "No it's not fine, that's private… intimate… between the two of us… no one else."

"Baby, I'm sorry, come here, let me love on ya." Grabbing a'hold of him around the waist, Rachel pulled, as best as she could since he weighed so much more than her. She began giving him short tender kisses.

"I can't believe you told em that shit, Rach." Bear whispered.

"Baby, I'm sorry if I can do it over, trust me…" Rachel said as she turned and glared a go to hell look at Lilly, "I would."

Lilly just raised her eyebrows and mouthed ok to herself and went back to reading her article on NKOTB in her teen magazine.

Bear grabbed Rachel in a hug and began kissing her fervently. She jumped up and wrapped her legs around him as he began walking her to their tent. He was still complaining and Rachel was still trying to make it better.

"Oh my god ya'll, Rachel's getting' knocked up tonight…make up sex is going to be her downfall." Lilly stated.

"Fuck off!" we heard in unison from the tent.

Looking back at the group that was now minus two, I saw TJ's face; he wasn't happy.

"Lils, what the fuck!" TJ exclaimed.

"It wasn't me, it was Curt."

"Ok, its over" I said, attempting to squash the whole situation. Finally, having had enough, I walked over to the truck. I jumped inside and went directly to the radio to find a new radio station. Pushing the seek button, song after song flashed by.

Hearing Ann Wilson of Heart belting out "How do I get you alone" I stopped. I loved that song! TJ's hand wrapped gently around mine as he began tugging me out from the cab. I pulled away flirtatiously looking at him, I knew he could see the lust in my eyes.

"Now, now darlin', I just wanna dance." I molded my body into him. Wrapped tight in his arms, a warm sensation arose throughout my body. Yet dread began to settle in. Question after question popped in my head. What was going to happen when we're apart at school? How would we survive? Not wanting to appear distraught I pulled him closer to me.

"Ya ok?"

"Fine, just feels good, here with you, I'm going to miss this."

We stopped dancing and stood there a minute connected by our eyes, as though they were carrying on a conversation themselves. I could see what his mind was telling me, but I also read what his body was saying. The desire that was burning in him told me I was in for it. He wanted me… and he wanted it slow, taking his time to encounter every inch of me; to relish every second that he was touching, tasting, watching and hearing me as though he's never touched me before, even though he had possessed every part already. He seemed like he was a man dying of thirst and I was his water and he wanted me now. Feeling him pull away gently, I knew it was time and I was up to date with what was on the agenda. Slowly, we walked hand in hand to our tent.

Walking inside, TJ immediately turned and zipped up the doorway. Hearing the music still blaring in the background, nothing else mattered; not Bear and Rachel, not leaving for school; nothing just me and him; our hearts secured to each other.

"TJ."

"Shhhhh."

As he was slowly walking towards me he stopped a minute by his bag and reached down in it and grabbed something.

"Whatcha got?"

Looking at his hand and walking closer to me he began speaking; "You know that my day begins and ends picturing your beautiful face?"

"Baby" I whispered.

Reaching me, he laid his palm up against the back of my neck and ran his thumb over my eyebrow and down my cheek. I slowly closed my eyes, memorizing the feel of his touch.

"Open your eyes, babe." he whispered softly as he leaned down and touched his nose to mine and looked into my eyes. "It'll never be enough."

"What won't ever be enough?" I murmured just as soft.

"Touching every part of you, for the rest of my life."

As he was talking he grasped my left hand, with his other hand opened, I saw the little black box.