Passion and Pain (Dancers and Divas) (10 page)

“Elena, keep perspective. She’s playing mind games with you since she didn’t get the lead. You can’t let her get to you!” Veronika said.

“Too late!”

Ten

“Are you still angry with me?” Sebastien asked Elena the next morning on the way to school.

“Of course not.
You didn’t do anything wrong. Letitia just has a way of spinning things. Veronika was right. I shouldn’t let her get to me.”

Elena smacked her lips as they walked on in silence.

“What is it?” he said.

“What do you mean?”

“You have a nervous habit of smacking your lips like that whenever you want to say something but don’t know how. You know you can tell me anything, don’t you?”

“Yeah, yeah.
It’s all good.”

Sebastien looked at her sideways.
“Really?”

“Fine,” she said. As if she could keep
a
secret from Sebastien.
“
I was just thinking how attractive Letitia was.”

“Yeah, and?”

“She seems to have a thing for you.”

“So you want to know if I’m into
her?
”

Elena nodded, feeling slightly ridiculous. How old was she, five?

“I’ll admit I think she’
s hot. I would be lying if I said I didn’t. But am I into her? I don’t think so. She is really not my type.”

“I would understand it, Seb.
You don’t have to pretend just because she hates me.” Sebastien stopped and grabbed Elena firmly by the shoulders, gazing directly into her eyes. “It will be a cold day in hell before I ever hook up with Letitia.”

Elena searched his blue eyes and knew he was telling her the complete truth. She exhaled, relieved.

“OK, I get it.”

He released her shoulders and they continued their walk to school.

“Did I mention I made the basketball team?” Sebastien said lightly.

“No! That’s fantastic! Frankie will be ecstatic to know you are now officially a jock. At any other school, that would make you popular.”

“I guess I will just have to rely on my charm and boyish good looks for that, then.”

Elena laughed with him. It wasn’t far from the truth. She knew how other girls looked at him. But she was his best friend and still very protective of him. Not every girl was good enough for her Seb.

“I’m only a freshman, so I will probably have very limited playing time, but I like it and it keeps me in shape,” he said as he patted his stomach. “It’s nice to do something different, too.”

“I guess I’ll have to go to the home games now, just in case.”

“Are you going to put on a little skirt and cheer for me?”

“Don’t push it!”

They were almost at school by now and with the cloud of Letitia gone, Elena felt light and happy. That quickly dissipated as they saw a group of kids outside the school in a circle clapping,
cheering and congratulating someone.

“What’s that about?” Elena said.

Veronika snuck up behind her. “Word
’
s out that she’s about to go on a week’s tour with her mom
-
backup singer for Yolanda Adams.
Big article in the newspaper this morning.”

“Who is?”

Veronika raised her eyebrows.

“You have got to be kidding!” Elena said.

Letitia spotted the three of them out of the corner of her eye and blew a kiss.

Elena shook her head and squeezed her way through the entrance. Show choir was up first.

“Try to keep your cool,” Veronika said to Elena.
“With both of them.”

Elena bustled to her seat, finding Frankie almost immediately.

“Ooh, there’s Jay,” Frankie said, nudging Elena.

“That’s nice. How’s Leon?”

“Wonderful,” Frankie sighed and continued to talk in detail about the little things he would do for her, like carry her bag or leave a flower in her locker, but Elena wasn’t listening. She was watching Jay as he leaned against the piano talking to someone. She could see his perfect profile and the muscles in his arms as he placed one hand on his hip. Elena sensed him turning in her direction and hung her head. Her view was further blocked as Letitia and her fan club strolled in.

“Elena, why are you sitting so close to the front? You are going to put me off if I have to listen to you,” Letitia said, followed by laughs on cue from her fan club.

“I can sit where I want. If you don’t like it,
you
sit somewhere else.” 

“I’m the lead, I have to sit in the front row,” Letitia said as if explaining it to a six year old. Elena felt the whole group staring at her.

Elena wanted to tell them all to go shove it, but the teacher had come in and she didn’t want to make a scene. Frankie yanked her off the seat and they moved to the back row.

Letitia grinned as she sat down
,
surrounded by her fans
.
Elena could imagine pulling out Letitia’s hair strand by strand.

Ms. Lazowski stood to the front of room, looking more excited than usual. “Let’s all applaud Letitia, who will be touring with Yolanda Adams next week.”

The students cheered and clapped loudly.

“It’s not like
she’s
actually one of the backup singers. Her mother is,” Elena said loudly. That earned her a few indignant looks from some of her worshippers. Letitia was too busy flicking her hair and bowing to notice.

And of course, as it would happen, because Letitia was so important the whole
class
was going to be focused on her solos because she would be missing one rehearsal.

“Everyone ready?”
Ms Lazowski asked.
“From the top.”

Letitia came in strong and pitch perfect. The choir came in later with the backup vocals.

“Stop!
Stop!”
Letitia said.

“What’s wrong, dear?” Ms Lazowski asked her.

“Not me. It’s the altos, something’s wrong.”

“I didn’t notice anything. Let’s try the altos
on their own
.”

The group sang confidently but Letitia was contorting her face in pain.

“It only takes one person,” Letitia said in exasperation. “Elena! I can hear it! You’re not in tune.”

“What? We were perfect and there is no way you could tell what I was singing from over there.”

“I’m the one with perfect pitch, so I’ll be the judge of that,” Letitia said.

Ms Lazowski hesitated. She looked indecisive as she heard the exchange.

“Um, OK, how about you sing it on your own, Elena?” Ms Lazowski said.

Elena could feel her facing burning as everyone turned to her expectantly
.
She didn’t think that was a great idea at all. Veronika piped in. “Why
don’t the altos
sing it without Elena and if you notice any difference, you’ll know it’s Elena.”

Thank you, Veronika.

“Very good
,
Veronika,” Ms Lazowski said.

Letitia closed her eyes and smiled as the altos sang without Elena. “Ah. That was much better.”

That was such a load of crap and they both knew it. But Letitia had made her point.

“Well, maybe you can work on that song Elena,” Ms Lazowski said.

“Sure, Ms Lazowski,” Elena said through clenched teeth.

Elena was relieved when it was lunch time. She was too humiliated to stay back and help Veronika pack her drums, so she bolted out and waited for them at their lunch spot.

“Bad day at choir?”
Sebastien said when he saw her. Elena placed her chin in her hands. “Why do you keep doing it to yourself?”

“Because Jay is there?”
Frankie said.

“Jay? So what’s the deal with this Jay guy? Are you and
he
…?” Sebastien said teasingly.

“No! I said it before, there is no me and him!”

“Go on, you can tell us.”

“He’s a good-
looking guy who can play a few tunes. They’re a dime a dozen at Montacrue. You know Frankie, she exaggerates everything.” Elena glared at Frankie and continued to sulk.

Veronika raised her eyebrow at Elena but she brushed it off. Why couldn’t everyone leave her alone?

She continued nibbling at her food in silence.

“So what’s that idea you wanted to tell me about, anyway?” Veronika asked Sebastien.

Sebastien’s face lit up. “Well, there are a couple of students from acting class who were hoping to work a new script. Most of them didn’t get lead roles so they wanted to do a bit more than just drama classes.”

“Right.”

“So I thought maybe you’d like to write a short play for us that we can perform and put into that Short Play competition you were talking about?”

“Did you have a topic in mind?” Veronika asked.

“Not yet, but we can think about it. We’re doing some improvisation classes after rehearsals with Miss Hammersmith. We could use that time to improvise a script.”

“Liking it, liking it,” Veronika said, nodding her head. “Yeah, let’s give it a try.”

“You should try some of these
improv
classes, Elena. You know, learn to be spontaneous,” Sebastien said.

“I can be spontaneous,” Elena said. He smiled.
“Sometimes.”
Sebastien’s smile grew broader.

“Fine, a little improvisation wouldn’t hurt.”

Sebastien laughed hard. “You’re so easy, Elena.”

She didn’t want to smile but Sebastien looked so pleased with himself, Elena couldn’t resist.

The bell rang and Leon motioned to Elena.  “Come on Juliet, time for rehearsals.” Elena rose reluctantly, noticing Frankie squirming in her seat. She probably hated this set up as much as she did. Elena was going to get up close and personal with Leon while Sebastien got intimate with Frankie and Letitia. This was not the way it was supposed to be!

Eleven

Winter was approaching and it had been several months now that Elena had been working on her technique for her contemporary class. She spent hours after school attending ballet classes the school offered, stretching and pushing her body to the maximum. And yet, each rehearsal she still felt inferior to the other girls.

“Elena, I think you should take a break. Don’t be so harsh on yourself. You’ll get it,” Ms Fontaine said, after Elena had spent a half hour repeating one turn again and again and not getting it. Though Elena rarely cried, she went to the corner, held her towel with her hands and buried her face in it.

She breathed in and out slowly, determined to get control back. “I can do this! I know I can!” she told herself. She stood with determination and continued with the exercise but it still was not working. By the end of class, Elena
slumped
her shoulders and left dragging her feet.

As she approached the changing room, Elena heard a small voice behind her. “I could help you, you know.”

Elena turned to see the tiny
blond
girl looking at her with pale blue eyes.

“How do you figure?”

“I know a lot about technique, but I can’t seem to perform very well. Maybe I could help you with technique and you could help me with performance?” The girl looked at her hopefully. Elena sat on the bench and curled her knees up to her chest. She was too exhausted to think.

“You do have brilliant technique. I am surprised you’re not at the School of American Ballet,” Elena said.

The girl tentatively came and sat next to her in the change room. “That was my first choice
,
but my grandmother insisted on a more diverse education. She wanted me to learn other dancing styles and graduate high school. So here I am. I go to the School of American Ballet for summer training,” she said in her quiet voice.

“I’m Elena, by the way.”

“Anya Shapiro. And yes, I’m Russian.
Ha
ha
, another Russian ballerina.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” Elena said and gave Anya a warm smile. Anya smiled back shyly.

“So how can I improve my technique?”

“First, I suggest you come to the class I teach on Saturdays. It’s free and though it has younger kids, I actually
correct the technique of each and every student. Most teachers just tell you to do this or that and don’t actually show you what you’re missing.”

“OK.”

“Then I think I should look at your practice routine and see what I can fix. The biggest problem is practicing the wrong thing. You can spend hours and go nowhere because of one tiny thing you never noticed,” Anya said quickly, almost running out of breath.