Authors: Holly Thompson
Baachan outfits me—
smock
wrist covers
gloves
baggy pants
and a huge
flower-print
bonnet
with visor
and neck ruffle
I complain
but she won’t stand
for my Yankees cap, a gift
from my dad one summer
not enough coverage
Baachan says and
double-knots
the bonnet ties
under my chin
very first time in that getup
I take a picture
email it to my mother
and the next week
in a packet
in the mailbox
is an all-sport sun hat
that Koichi and Uncle
covet
I ask my mother to send two more
which she does
express
but Baachan says the hats were wasteful
scowls through dinner
the day they are delivered
interrupts
to change the subject
if anyone
dares
ask me a question or
draw me into
conversation
upstairs
Yurie tells me not to worry
I expect her to go on
say
Baachan’s a stubborn old fool
or something in my defense
but she sides with her
says
Baachan’s lived through hard times
in a farm household
where nothing is thrown out
everything recycled
and no item purchased
unless absolutely necessary
I roll my eyes
but Yurie frowns
says
it’s due to Baachan’s ways
that the farm’s a success
that she could study pharmacology
that Koichi could specialize
in agricultural mechanical technology
that Uncle could purchase additional lands
that they could open their home
this summer
to me
in the bath
I fume
and sulk
and curse you, Ruth,
for sticking me here
with cheapskate relatives
and ancestors always hovering
in the altar
and I wonder
how will I make it through
nearly two more months
in this village
so far from everything?
Y
ou’d think the way they talk
and don’t talk about certain things
around here that it was
my father’s fault
my mother left the farm
but she’d decided sometime
in her last year of high school
she would study abroad
so when she failed
her college entrance exams
instead of studying to take them again
she took a job
at the district agricultural office
that she could cycle to
from the farm
and for two years
saved
her money
then, despite Baachan’s
and Jiichan’s protests
despite warnings
from aunts, uncles
and villagers
but with encouragement
from an escapee cousin
in Queens
she flew to New York
moved in with three
other Japanese
taking advantage of
the late-eighties
bubble-era
crazy days
of plenty
of yen
she took classes at a
community college and
worked at a Japanese restaurant
where she rose to rank of hostess
and learned to wear kimono
and walk and bow and hold herself
like farm girls generally don’t
and where she seated my father
at the same street-facing window table
for lunch every
Sushi Fair! Wednesday
his routine escape
from the rigors
of law school
it wasn’t his fault that
as he gathered his notes
from the tabletop one afternoon
she confided in him
that someday she, too
hoped to attend
university
to study what?
he’d asked
plant science
she’d hastily replied
then laughed
suddenly
wildly
hysterically
what’s so funny?
he’d asked
I grew up on a farm!
she said
so?
he said
I’m here in New York
she said
so?
he said
no green! no plants!
she said
and because he didn’t get the joke
that by then had her clutching her
obi-bound sides
he’d asked her
if she would join him
for brunch
in Brooklyn
on Sunday
which is when she first had
an everything bagel
with cream cheese
and lox
here in Kohama
no one says so but I know
they blame my father
for taking my mother
but my mother says it
was the fault of the lox
that after she ate the lox
bit through the softness of
salmon with slivers of onion
she looked at this man
my father
and listened
to everything he had to say
about anything
understanding only
one quarter of what he had to say
about anything
but those were the days
before U.S. orange imports into Japan
when village
mikan
brought in good money
and Jiichan was able to lure my mother home
with promises rare for a fourth daughter
that he had yen left over
to help her start a business
that he would purchase land
for hothouses
for her
so my mother
understanding at last
her love for plants
and growing things,
and thinking she owed her father gratitude,
and thinking my father
a law student who loved
not plants but
ideas and debate
didn’t fit her future,
returned to Kohama
worked at the agricultural office again
harvested
mikan
and planned a business raising
salad greens and heirloom vegetables
even now when we’re walking
through the village
Baachan sometimes says
your mother planned to put her
first hothouses here
or
your mother had her eyes
on that plot there
or
that man standing over there
had planned to ask your mother
to marry him
but within a year
after passing the bar exam
my father caught a plane to Narita
found his way to the city of Numazu
took a bus to this
mikan
district
arrived
in Kohama
unannounced
unknown
asking at the gasoline stand
owned by my grandfather’s brother
for the home of
Sachiko Mano
Emi and I always loved the tale
the daring
the nerve
but Jiichan and Baachan
never forgave the surprise
of this man
who our mother
had never mentioned
to anyone in Kohama
until he appeared
in the driveway
and dropped to one knee
speaking words of English
even Baachan understood
even Jiichan guessed
and words of Japanese
he’d practiced for weeks
in night classes
they married three weeks later
held a party paid for
from my father’s savings
in Kohama’s village hall
followed several months after that
by a quiet ceremony
and brunch reception
in Brooklyn
with bagels and lox
they moved to the far suburbs
of New York City
upstate
they joked
to buy a small house with
enough land for plots
of Asian vegetables
I arrived
after hothouses had been built
soil was compost rich
Sachi’s Farm
had been born
and my mother was marketing her first
Japanese pumpkins and edible luffa
Emi followed
in the year the daikon grew
long as two-year-old me
visits from New York
back to Kohama
started when I was three
but by age seven
I could tell
things were strained—
us staying
not at this house
not with Jiichan and Baachan
Aunt, Uncle and first cousins Koichi and Yurie
but in homes of second cousins
and once, even
an inn
not till the start of Jiichan’s cancer
when my mother tutored us
for months before
bringing us over
to help
to behave
and make amends
not until then
did we sleep at this house
did we get treated like family
did Jiichan have a good thing to say
about my father
or Emi
or me
that was when Jiichan
on his good days
taught me how to dig clams
for soup
how to sharpen a knife
on a stone
and clean and scale
aji
fish by the pump
in the driveway