One (14 page)

I can't look him in the
eye.

How could I have been
so wrong about a person? I thought he'd had everything. I thought he
was living the fairy tale life. He
looked
like he was living
the fairy tale life. I should've looked deeper.

I should've gone on
that date with him.

It's too late now,
I tell myself irritably. He's not going to want to go out with me
now
after what I'd done. Who would? I certainly wouldn't.

"You okay?"
Alex asks as I walk past him. "You look pissed as hell."

I'm startled he
notices. I try to shake my annoyance. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just
handed them the food," I explain, turning my back toward table
nine. I can't look at his perfect face and see his perfect smile; not
now when I know his life
isn't
perfect. "How are your
tables?" I ask Alex, trying to sound normal. What I really want
to do is cover my head and take a couple deep breaths.

"Okay." He
grins. "Table two was trying to hit on me though."

I shoot him a glance
over my shoulder. "The
whole
table?"

He tries not to look
smug. "Yep." He stands by me, leaning beside the counter.
The muscles along his arms flex as he crosses his hands over his
chest.

"It must be your
man boobs," I say, nodding toward the pectorals peeking out of
his thin cotton shirt.

"Must be," he
agrees, not sounding the least embarrassed.

I look down at myself
and then at the other girls in the black and white Maddie's uniforms.
"Alex," I begin seriously. "Am I the ugliest person
here?" I wave, gesturing to a group of other workers near by.

He looks serious as he
thinks. He doesn't answer right away. "Beauty is in the eye of
the beholder, I guess," he finally says. I should be happy he
didn't answer "yes", but somehow, I still feel a little
insulted.

"Why did Anna hire
me?" I wonder out loud.

Alex bends closer to
me, studying my face. His eyes are analytical, but I still feel
embarrassed anyway. He holds my chin in his hands and angles my face
toward the light. "You're interesting," he says after a few
moments.

Interesting?
Pax
had called me that. "What's so interesting about me?"
What's so interesting about me that the most gorgeous and popular
man on campus would go out of his way to try to get a date?

"Hmm… I'm not
sure." He looks puzzled. "Your eyes are a decent shade of
gray, your nose is a little too small, your mouth is normal looking,
and you've got
some
cheekbones sticking out…" He
touches my face again. "Ordinary features," he murmers to
himself. I open my mouth in shock at his blunt honesty.
Ordinary
features?
I decide he and Nat should never meet. Together they'd
shred my self-esteem into nothing.

"Don't stop,"
I say, a little sarcastic as Alex continues to stare at me. "You've
just gotten started."

His lips curve into
what I think is a smile. "So many ordinary features yet when
they come together, they make something quite extraordinary."
His eyes stare into mine. "That's what makes you interesting,
Jules."

I wasn't expecting
that. I blink a few times as I let his words sink in. He's got a
little smirk on his face like he knows he's said the right thing.
After a lengthy silence, I say, "You probably get a lot of
tips."

"Damn right I do."

I roll my eyes, trying
not to smile. "Go flirt with table two. They're probably still
ogling you."

"Don't mind if I
do." He turns more serious when he says, "Let me know if
you need anything. Remember to check back often on table nine."

My eyebrows gather
together. I feel a familiar prickling of annoyance as Pax's face
flashes in my mind. "Yeah," I mutter.

"In fact, why
don't you do a check up on each of your tables right now?"

Yes, Mr. Anna.
"Okay."

"I'll be-"

"Casually
strolling around, letting everyone ogle my manly goods if I need
you," I interrupt, finishing his sentence for him.

He pats me on the back.
"You got it, newbie."

I watch him saunter
away, observing how the customers stop and admire him. My eyes stroll
to the other workers, and I notice the same thing. Every Maddie's
worker is dressed in black and white so we stand out among the crowd.
I see Courtney bending down, flashing her ample cleavage. I see a
slim Asian girl laugh at something table four says, and the men there
practically lap up her laughter like it's cold Kool-Aid on a hot day.
My eyes go across the room and I spot Alaina. Instantly, my stomach
drops. Why can't I get a break? I already feel like crap about the
way I treated Pax; I don't need her to heap more on me.

I barely muster a smile
as I check on each table. Table eight sends back their pasta. Too
brittle, one customer complained. So I take it through the kitchen
and ask them to remake it. Table eleven needs refills. Soon, every
table on my list is taken care of- except nine. I have lead feet as I
force myself over to nine. Pax sees me right away and leans back, his
one dimpled smile appearing like magic.

"That was a really
good choice, Jules," he calls out to me. "That pasta hit
the spot." How can his eyes still twinkle when he's lost the two
most important people to him?

Why isn't he dark like
me?

"I'm glad," I
reply, a little stiffly. "How are the rest of your dishes?"
I ask, relieved to look away from Pax.

"Maddie's never
disappoints," Coach barks, clapping Cade on the back. "Tell
your folks this place is still the best in town."

"Yes sir,"
Cade replies. "They'll be happy to hear that."

Abruptly, it makes
sense now why they're seated at table nine. Cade's family owns
Maddie's. That's probably why Cade and Pax seem so close.
They
must have grown up together before… before…
Even in my mind I
can't say the word. I'm not afraid of it. I've seen so much of it,
but for some reason I feel dry inside like I'll crack at any moment
if I think about Pax's parents. Thinking about that will make me
think about Grandma. I'd survived that long ago; I don't want to
relive it again.

I'm pulled out of my
thoughts when the two suits start to get up.

"You are one
convincing young man," the older one tells Pax, reaching to
shake his hand. "No one's ever been able to get so much out of
me before." Instead of sounding irritated, he sounds impressed,
jovial even.

Pax laughs. It's such a
rich sound now that I know more about him. "Thank you, sir. The
children, patients and I thank you for your generosity."

"No, thank
you
for making me feel confident that when I leave this earth there will
be people like you around to make sure we still treat each other
right."

"Thank you for the
compliment, sir." Even formal, Pax seems at ease.

Cade signals me closer.
"This is all on the house."

I nod, stepping back to
make room for them all to leave. I want to breathe a sigh of relief.
I don't turn back to watch them leave as their bodies move past me.
Instead, I start piling dishes one on top of another.

"Hey." He's
so close I jump. Pax's green eyes stare down into mine. "Hi
Jules."

Instantly, my heart
starts pounding. His voice is husky, sensual and nothing like the
voice he had used moments earlier. He sounds like a lover.

"Pax," I
squeak. I sound like a mouse.

"We didn't work
you too hard did we?"

I shake my head. "No."

"I used to help
out here when I was younger," he tells me, leaning against the
table so I can't continue my work. I'm forced to look at him. "I
know the hustle and grind. It can be a lot of work."

"Yeah." My
eyes trace the muscles on his arm that two layers of cotton can't
hide. I believe he used to work here all right. Out of the corner of
my eye, I see the two guys from table two leave. Alex starts cleaning
the empty table, a smile flirting around his mouth.

"Do you like it so
far here? Everyone treating you all right? Anna being nice to you?"

I blink several times
at him. There's genuine concern in his eyes, and it makes me
uncomfortable especially after what I did.

"Yes, everything
is good."

"Let me know if it
isn't. I know people who know people."

My eyebrows shoot up.
"Really. And what can these…
people
do?"

He leans in closer.
"Anything you want, baby."

I hate what he does. I
hate how he can make me want to smile without even saying anything
funny.
Charisma
. I hate it.

I purse my lips
together so the smile doesn't break free. "I think I'll be
fine." I'm tougher than these girls. "I've got thick skin."

He cocks his head a
little, puzzled by something. "I believe you," he says
slowly. "You're so small and delicate, but I know you're right.
There's steel inside you."

I shudder a little from
his words. "Grandma always said in order to survive we had to be
steel inside. Ice can melt. It can break, but steel can't." I
don't know why I told him that. I never talk about Grandma. Not even
to Braidon. I glare at Pax.

"My steel girl,"
he says softly. Somehow his lips have moved closer to me. Somehow his
whole face is inches from mine. Instantly I feel guilt gnaw at my
insides.

"I'm sorry,"
I blurt out. It sounds abrupt. His eyes don't waver from mine. "About
last night," I explain. "I left without a word. It was rude
and I'm sorry."

His gaze refuses to let
mine go. "It happens."
No, it doesn't,
I want to
scream. Why are you so understanding? You should be angry and
offended. You shouldn't even want to look at me.

I shake my head. "It's
not okay. The least I could've done was to let you know. I-I just
started to feel a little overwhelmed." I take a deep breath. "My
boyfriend and I just recently broke up before I moved here," I
confess. "It wasn't… the best relationship and I'm just
trying…"
to survive on my own
. I don't say the words
aloud. I'm horrified I even told him this much.

The green fire in his
eyes is a blaze that almost sucks me in. "I just got out of a
relationship six months ago," he tells me quietly. "I
didn't think I would find someone that I'd want to get to know so
soon, but you rolled down that hill and something inside me started
moving again.
A lot
of me started moving again, actually."

The sexual innuendo
makes my face heat up. Pax does it so effortlessly. His grin is a
smirk and a tease all at once, and I have to glance away before I do
something stupid like kiss him.

"Do you know what
I've realized, Jules? We only have one life. We can't control what
the universe decides to throw at us, but we can control how we react
to it. We control the choices we make, and the people we choose to
surround ourselves with." His voice is a seduction and I lean in
closer. "
One
, Jules. One life. One chance. Why not make
it count? Why not do more than you think you can? Why not take a
risk?" I watch his lips form the words.

"I want to take
you out on that date, Jules," he continues in a low voice. "I
like you, and I have a feeling if you give me a chance you might like
me too." The last part is laced with a cockiness he can't hide.
He's confident; he knows his worth.

"Do you always get
what you want?" I counter.

"Not always. But
I'm a patient man."

"You're very
stubborn. It's like you have rocks in your head," I try to
stall.

"My head's as hard
as my body."

"Probably because
that body of yours is made out of cement," I retort.

"I thought girls
like a man hard."

I suck in a breath.
"Not all," I manage to reply.

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Like a man hard?"

This is spiraling out
of control. My heart is beating faster, but the sensations are
pleasant like adrenaline rushing through every cell. "No,"
I choke out, trying not to feel his metal hard body brushing against
mine.

"Prove it,"
he challenges.

There's a roar in my
head. "What?"

"Go on a date with
me while I'm… hard."

I can feel the blush
creep down to my neck, and somehow my lips still want to smile. I'm
at war with myself. I want to move closer, but another part of me is
desperate to flee. I've never felt like this before. Everything Pax
brings out in me is new and unexpected and… pleasant.
He's like
alcohol,
I realize. He gets me to a high without even trying.
He's intoxicating.

"I promise you'll
like it," he teases.

I break. "One
date," I try to tell him sternly. Somehow it comes out softer
than I intend.

"One," he
repeats. "My favorite number."

"And after that-"

"We'll go on to
date number two."

It's over. I start
laughing. He grins, an impish grin that makes him look considerably
younger than twenty-one. He puts an arm around me and gives me a
quick, chaste kiss on my cheek. I feel the heat on my skin linger as
I watch him walk away.

"See you soon,
Jules," he calls out.

I wave. I don't notice
I smiled until my smile abruptly falters.

Alaina is glaring at
me.

Her green eyes scream
murder.

I'm not nervous.

I'm not,
I
repeat silently.
I'm
not
nervous.

Every pulse throbs,
beating to a silent drumbeat I can't decipher. I almost hear the
blood rushing in my head. I inhale, taking a few heavy, deep breaths,
then letting it out slowly. Mild irritation flutters through me. It's
not like I haven't been alone with Pax before. I've even sat on top
of him.