Omniscient Leaps (11 page)

His eyes flickered over in my direction and I froze. Luke’s lips parted and I saw his gaze drift from my head to the bottommost edge of my old-fashioned attire. Before he could say anything I was gone, back in Jenna’s room shaking my head. She had just finished saying something and I was clueless—still reeling from my short-lived encounter to Luke’s world.

“You’re not listening to me, are you?”

“Sorry Jenna,” I apologized. “I just had the weirdest flash. I spaced out.”

“You look gorgeous and all the guys are going to be asking you for a dance,” she smiled. “Her dress was identical, except for the fact that it was blue. Her sudden confidence, cheery disposition, and the way she held herself, made it apparent she would have loved living during the Victorian era.”

“Your dress suits you. You look hot, girl!” I teased. “Maybe you were meant to live during a different time period.”

She gave me a cheerless yet agreeable smile. “I think I would have liked the courting better back then.”

Her eyes instantly watered up and she turned away from me to undress. I followed suit. “So you said you haven’t dated in a while. Why is that?” I felt like she had been trying to tell me something since our first encounter in the hall, but maybe she just wasn’t sure she could trust me. Our relationship had grown over the past few weeks and I hoped she would finally open up.

Once she was sporting her sweats and a t-shirt, she dropped to the bed and slapped the spot beside her. “What I am going to tell you is in confidence. I feel like maybe we share a similar experience and I know I can trust you.”

I grabbed her hand. “Your secret is safe with me.”

“My freshman year started out great. I was even invited to some of the same parties as you.” She glanced towards me like she expected me to remember. I just smiled knowing outright that I couldn’t recall most of the individuals at those parties. I usually showed up, tried to blend in and then left. “I thought I was finally part of something special, you know.”

“The only reason I hung out with that group was because I was afraid to branch out on my own. Remember?” I interrupted. “There’s nothing great about them. Reyna was my only real friend. I still can’t figure out why she likes them, but that’s her prerogative. I’m just glad I’ve moved on.”

“Me too,” she replied. “Anyway, against my better judgment I consumed some alcohol one night. Gage Parton was hitting on me and he seemed so sweet. We went into a back room to “talk” and the rest is history I guess.”

“What did he do to you?” I whispered. A lump rose in my throat because I knew what she was going to say.

“It’s my fault really. I liked kissing him. Being with him felt comfortable. Even though a voice in my head said it was going to go too far, I didn’t pull away from him like I should have.” The tears were streaming down her face. “When he suddenly insisted we have sex, I tried to stop him. I really liked him, but I was a virgin and I wasn’t ready. I didn’t know him at all. Frankly, I was way too young to have been at that party in the first place… something I realize in hindsight, of course. ”

“Oh, Jenna,” I said on an exhale.

“He said I was just scared and I would enjoy it. No matter how much I struggled, or said no, he wouldn’t stop. He was too strong for me. It was the worst experience of my life,” she sobbed. “Then the teasing at school. Well, that almost pushed me over the edge. I wanted to kill myself. My parents took me out of school for a while and had me see a counselor. They never knew what had happened though.”

“I’m so sorry,” I said, pulling her in for a hug. “He’s such a creep!”

“It was weird because when he was finished he seemed almost sorry for what he’d done. His sweet compliments and words were probably his attempt to make me feel like everything was okay.” She stood up and paced the room. “Is that how it happened for you?”

“Actually… we didn’t,” I began softly. “He tried, believe me. But the strangest thing happened. I said a prayer, for the first time in my life I might add, and his stereo exploded or something. He was knocked unconscious and I got away. I’m so sorry that you couldn’t.”

“Is that when you found God?” she asked. “When I was at the end of my rope I turned to Him. I don’t know what would have happened if I hadn’t.”

“Yes,” I smiled. “That’s why I came to the Young Life meeting. I was trying to find something that felt right to me so I could get to know Him better.”

“So how did you shut down Gage when he was trying to tease you? He was spreading lies about you, I heard them.”

“Yeah, I know,” I groaned. “I just repeated something I heard him tell someone in confidence. It was humiliating and he knew if he continued on his quest I would share it.” It was a lie of course, but I couldn’t exactly tell her the truth.
Ugg…sorry Lord.

Once we got off the subject of Gage Parton we both relaxed, or tried to at least. I couldn’t help the disturbing feelings boiling beneath the surface of my emotions. Part of me didn’t want to help him at all. In my opinion, he was a predatory criminal who’d refused to learn from his father’s mistakes. He’d chosen a despicable path and I wondered how many girls he’d taken advantage over the last four years.

We practiced our hairstyles as we talked about my possible selection of dates. I wasn’t overly excited about my choices, but at least all the guys in our group could be considered gentleman. I wouldn’t have to worry about any of them getting out of line.

When I realized the time, I had Jenna walk me to the door so I could head home. I pulled into the drive and sighed. Lit by only the dim brightness of the street light, I was greeted by the shadowy darkness of my house. I found myself momentarily disappointed that my mom hadn’t remembered to leave a light on for me when she stopped home to change.
She always remembers.
I then rebuked myself for having such a thought. She was so overworked she’d probably just forgotten.

I turned the knob and pushed open the door. Even before the light had fully illuminated the room, I’d recognized the gray outline of a figure. Gripping my wrist keychain in a defensive stance, I silenced my yelps and stepped forward to face the intruder.

“
What
are you?” he asked with a shaky voice. “Am I going to hell for what I tried to do to you?”

Gage Parton had found a way into my house and was seated on the couch of my living room cowering like a child. Unsympathetic yet curious about his reasons for breaking into my house, I decided to answer him.

“No,” I snapped. “But part of me wants you to for what you did to Jenna Mathews and who knows how many other girls.”

“What? How did you know?” His lower lip began to tremble as a new wave of fear passed into his consciousness. I moved closer.

“I’m friends with her, you big oaf,” I screamed as I grabbed a baseball bat out of the coat closet. “Now what are you doing in my house? This better be good because I’m going to call the police in about thirty seconds.”

“I think I am losing my mind,” he sputtered. “I remember you trying to help my mom when I was little. You look exactly the same and it’s driving me mad. It’s not possible and…”

“What happened to your mom, Gage?”

He glanced down at the floor as an unrepressed tear rolled down his cheek.
Do not feel sorry for him!
“She abandoned us when I was nine.”

“Do you really believe that?” I asked. His eyes met mine and I knew he didn’t. “The thing I don’t get is… how could you turn out exactly like your father? You were such a sweet kid.”

“I am nothing like my father!” he shouted. Then he took a deep breath and looked up at me once again. He was visibly afraid of me, something that was hard not to revel in. “So you admit to seeing me as a child?”

“I grew up here in this town. Of course I remember seeing you.” I felt bad for his utter confusion, yet I found it satisfying to see him so frustrated. I wanted to be the better person, and in time maybe I would, but right now I couldn’t help how I was feeling. My pain and the sadness I felt for Jenna was too raw.

“But you—” he cut himself off. “Well if you are able to help my mom I would really appreciate it. She was my whole world, and my dad, well he deserves to be locked up.”

“So do you,” I said sharply.

“Jenna,” Gage began. He was whimpering. “I always had a crush on her and I really thought she liked me. It was never my intention to hurt her.”

“She did like you until you didn’t listen to her pleas to stop. No means no, Gage. It’s not rocket science.”

“I know,” he began to sob again.

“Then why did you spread rumors and allow the teasing at school? You almost broke the poor girl. Do you understand that?” His eyes widened in disbelief. He obviously had no idea how deeply he had scarred Jenna. “She almost died because of you.”

“I have no excuse,” he agreed. “And you. Well I thought you were a wild girl playing up a shy facade. You’ve kissed so many of my friends and I thought you did stuff like that all the time.”

“What?” I screamed. “I’m a virgin. I hung out with your group of friends because Reyna made it easy for me. I’ll admit the kissing was foolish, but I never enjoyed it.” I stopped to glare at him. “Gosh, you are a pig.”

“I swear there are no others. I like to talk big because it gets me attention and unfortunately a lot of girls like to be treated like dirt. Most of the time I don’t even start the rumors that are circulating. Our peers thrive off gossip, so I let them continue. I’m scum, I know. I don’t know how to make it better.”

“You can start by apologizing,” I scowled. “And stop the macho crap. All the lies you make and spread to feel better about yourself. You are hurting people. No one finds it funny but you and your friends. It’s disgusting.”

“I know,” he agreed. “But I am
not
my father. You don’t even know.”

“The man tried to kill me with a choke hold so don’t—” I stopped myself. It was too late. He had already caught what I had said.

“I saw your neck yesterday, but my dad’s been out of town for a week,” he replied. His voice was shaky once again. “
What
are you? Did you go back in time or something? I remember my dad’s coworker’s accusing him of something when I was younger but all the charges were dropped. They never found the girl.”

“Look, all you need to know is that I work for God. You need to get yourself on the right path and let me worry about your dad.” His eyes were bulging, yet he simply nodded his head. “I am going to try to help your mom, but I can’t promise anything. I’m new at this.”

“Be careful. My dad is dangerous, lethally dangerous if he wants to be,” Gage whispered.

“I think I know that by now,” I said. “I’m sorry about your childhood but your actions are your own, Gage. No one can make you into a creep except yourself.”

“When do you think you will go back again?” His continuing interest in my plans didn’t surprise me. He was desperate.

“It’s not my choice,” I admitted. “I don’t have control over it. All I know is that if I do my job right, you probably won’t even remember any of this. And maybe with your mom in the picture your past actions won’t have taken place either.”

“I’m sorry, Kara,” he said with a genuine sincerity I never would have believed or expected. “I am so glad you stopped me because I… I’m so sorry.”

“
I
didn’t stop you,” I replied. “God did.” He gulped loudly and dropped his head in shame. “And I can’t just forgive you… but I’ll work on it. It’s not as simple in situations like this.”

“I understand,” he said, getting up to walk to the door. Then, without warning, he turned and embraced me. He held me tightly like he hadn’t hugged anyone in years—sobbing uncontrollably. “I truly am sorry and thank you, Kara.”

“Right,” I replied uneasy. “You don’t make it easy for someone to stay mad at you when you are all emotional like this.”

He looked up at me with a half grin. “By the way, you need to lock your windows. It was too easy to get in.”

“Thanks for the safety tip,” I shouted into the cold air as I watched him duck into his car. Mentally exhausted, I quickly found myself horrified to see my mom strolling across the front lawn.

“Who was that cutie?” Her eyes were tired, but her smile was energetic and full of inquiry. I wished for once I could appease her concerns on the boyfriend front.

“No one, Mom. Seriously,” I snorted as we closed the door. “One of Reyna’s friends.”

“I thought you two had a whole group of friends in common.”

“Not anymore. Not ever really,” I added in a hushed response. “Reyna and I will always be friends, but I’ll never understand what she sees in some of them. Including Gage.”

I followed her into her room as she removed her food-coated apron. “Oh, but he looked so nice.”

If you only knew
. “He’s something alright.”

“What was he doing here if you don’t like him?” I felt like she was cross-examining me. Of course I was concealing information, but it would only traumatize her if she knew the truth.

“We were just coming to an understanding about something,” I announced. “So how was work?”

I spent the next thirty minutes listening to her ramble on about her day in the classroom and the restaurant. It was amazing that she could even stand on her own two feet after the day she’d endured. She made my problems seem small in comparison, at least for a few minutes, and I was thankful for the distraction.

Mom and I retired
early to bed. Gage’s unexpected visit had thrown me, unnerved me even. After hearing Jenna’s secret, he’d been the last person I’d wanted to see. The fact that our conversation had dissolved most of the anger I had towards him made me wonder if I was going soft.

My head brushed the pillow and I was out.

“Did I really see you today or was I imagining things?” Luke’s voice was soft. Until I turned and saw him standing beside my lake, I thought maybe I’d imagined his voice.

“Yes,” I admitted. “That was the shortest and most bizarre flash I’ve had thus far.”

We both moved silently through the dark forest. The moonlight streamed through the trees creating little slivers of light, enough to help us find our way down to the dock. I sat down on the edge and dangled my feet in the cool water. Luke soon joined me. One day soon I was going to make a splash and test the water with my whole body, go for a real swim.