No Regrets (Live Today #2) (8 page)

“She was so happy, your mom. She just knew you were going to be a boy.” He smiles at his memory. “I came home from work one day and she had painted your room blue. That was her way of telling me she was pregnant.” He looks over to me. “She did the same for you. You had the prettiest baby pink walls with butterflies painted all around.” My head drops as a tear falls from my face onto my lap. I don’t want him to see me crying.

“But then I got laid off. When I couldn’t find a job, she did what she thought she had to do to keep us from losing the house. She wrote to your grandparents. I had no clue she had done so.” He turns away from us before finishing. “Not until I got a letter from her. The day she left us.” He turns to look at Brennan. “I’m sure you remember that day?” He asks. Brennan hiccups and nods. “Your grandparents… Your grandparents had written her the day before. Told her that they would pay off the house and leave a substantial amount of money in the bank for us, if she left us and returned home.”

“The letter.” I gasp looking to Drew immediately. He drops his head and shakes it.

“What?” Brennan asks.

“My dream.” I turn to him. “The one I had when we were driving down here. Didn’t Drew tell you?” Realization hits him as I explain the dream I had.

“Jenna.” Dad says kneeling down in front of Brennan and me. “Princess, you did nothing wrong.” He rests his hand on my knee as he continues, looking at both of us in the eye. “None of us did. Your mom loved you two more than life itself. She did what she thought she had to do, for us all.”

“But we didn’t have to have the house, dad.” Brennan chokes out. “We would have been happy wherever we were.”

“I tried telling her that son.” He says. “I tried. I called her day and night begging for her to come home. All I wanted was her to come home to me… to us.” He drops his head. “But she wouldn’t have it. Damn stubborn woman. Once something is set in place. There’s no turning back. So she changed her phone number and that was that.”

“Sounds like someone we know.” Matt says from his chair. I give him a glare and winks, trying to break the tension in the room. It works because I smile at him in return.

“Don’t mess with a Munson woman.” Dad says and stands looking at Gabe. “You’ll do well to remember that.”

“Oh believe me sir.” Gabe kisses the top of my head. “I learned that years ago.”

~~~

“I don’t understand.” Brennan shifts closer to Ashley. “You say she left because she was trying to do what’s best for us. But what’s your excuse?”

“Love.” Is all dad says.

“Love?” Brennan asks confused. “Dad, for nearly ten years, you never dated anyone. Who was there to love?”

“Your mother.” He looks Brennan straight in the eye. “Did you ever wonder why I never dated?” he asks. Brennan shrugs just before dad raises his left hand. “I made a vow to your mother. I made a promise to love her and only her until the day I died.” My breath hitches and I immediately look up to Gabe. He smiles down at me and kisses my forehead. It wasn’t just a few hours ago that we made the same promise to each other.

Dad walks over to the writing table and opens the drawer. And pulls out two small boxes and continues. “Your mother wouldn’t allow me to speak to her on the phone. I think it was because if she had, she would break down and come home. If she did that, we would be left with nothing. But she did write to me… To us, often.” He carries the boxes back to the couch. “The only way I could reply without the letters getting destroyed was through Patty.” He looks back at her. She smiles gently in return.

“She wrote often.” He places each box on both Brennan and my hands. “She made me promise not to let you know she was in contact. She thought it easier for you to think she was out of our lives. She didn’t want you to hold onto hope.” A tear falls from his eye before he wipes it away quickly before sitting back down. “Those are the letters written to you while I was there.”

“I don’t understand.” I whisper. “Why give them to us now?” He shakes his head and chuckles.

“It’s what she wanted.” He admits. “Now, back to your question son.” He changes direction to Brennan. “About ten years ago, I received another letter. This one was different. She told me that her mother had passed away, and her father was put in a resting home. She sent a plane ticket along with her letter. She wanted me to join her finally. But the only stipulation was, because her father was still alive, and he had his lawyers keeping an eye on every move she made, she made arrangements with a landscaping company and signed a contract for remodeling of the property.”

“I still don’t get it?” Brennan asks.

“I am the owner and CEO of that exact same landscape company son.” He confesses. “I spearheaded the entire job. Giving me rights to move freely on the property. Giving us a chance to reunite again.”

“So you left us to be with her?” My brother asks. “Why didn’t you say anything? You just walked out dad. You took the keys and walked out with no word.”

“Son. That was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life.” There’s a pain in his voice. “When I was finally able to speak to her on the phone. My first concern was you.” Brennan stands and walks away.

“We are your children!” He yells. “You left us.”

“You were eighteen. Old enough to take care of yourself.”

“But what about her?” Brennan points to me. I drop my head and sob. “You fucking left her. I don’t give a shit about you leaving me. Your right, I was eighteen. But she was just a kid still. A kid that was still after ten years struggling with the loss of her mom.” Dad stands to argue, but Brennan isn’t having it. “Don’t you dare say she didn’t struggle! You and I both know she did. We both heard her nightmares. It doesn’t matter that she walked into the kitchen with a smile on her face, we heard her! She needed you! Fuck, she needed mom!” He cries. “You should have loved us enough to stay.  You should have told her that if she truly loved us, she would have come back to us. Not the other way around.”

“You’re right! I should have.” His face is filled with sorrow as tears fall. “I’m a coward. I should have stayed with you two. But instead I was selfish and wanted to be with her. When she left, my world fell apart!”

“When you left… So did Jenna’s!” Brennan yells. “You weren’t there to pick up the pieces. You didn’t have to watch her walk around like a zombie. You didn’t have to watch her pull away from everybody we knew. Six months dad. For six fucking months, I had thought I’d lost her.” I bury my head in my hands as Gabe pulls me on his lap and holds me. I can’t bear listening to this again. But in know I have to. “Mom always bragged about how much Jenna would shine like a gem. But when you left, you took that shine away from her. Fuck! God I hated you for doing that to her.”

“I can’s apologize enough for what I’ve done son.” He walks over to Brennan, resting his hand on his shoulder. “All I can do is thank you.” Brennan shoves his hand away.

“Thank me?” He snaps. “No! You don’t get to thank me, dad. You can thank Will for that. He pulled her out of it. But you can’t thank him can you? No, you can’t. Because he’s dead dad!” He pushes dad back again. “He’s dead because of you!”

“Brennan!” I shout “Stop!”

“No Jenna.” He hollers back. “It’s true. If he wouldn’t have left, I wouldn’t have had to sell drugs and you wouldn’t have gotten hooked on them. We wouldn’t have had to go save you that night.”

“It could have happened to anyone Bren.” Matt chimes in.

“But it didn’t did it? Because it happened to us, to her.”

“Your mother wouldn’t let me come home son.” Dad steps toward Brennan again. “When we heard about the accident, it broke our hearts knowing that you were in pain and she was hurt. But your mom was sick. I couldn’t leave her.”

“Jenna could have died! But that’s okay?”

“No it’s not.” Dad confesses. “We called the hospital every hour checking on her prognosis. The moment her status got worse, I told mom, I would be on the jet to California. But your mother was dying too.”

“When did her father die?” I ask through my sobs, changing the subject. “How long ago did he die?” Dad turns to look at me with sorrow in his face.

“The day you turned eighteen. He… he died on your birthday.”

“And you didn’t feel it would have been acceptable to come home then? Or even to come and get us?”

“By the time he passed, your mom thought it would be best to leave you two alone. But it didn’t stop us keeping tabs on you. Shortly after that, she became sick and didn’t want to bother you with more heartache.”

“But why now?” I ask. “Why?” He walks over and sits next to me.

“After your accident, she decided she wanted to make amends. But she was too afraid you and your brother wouldn’t forgive her. Then we got notification that you were putting the house up for sale. When that happened, she knew you two were ready to move on, so she chickened out. She bought the house back from you. This you know.”

“But I thought.” Brennan sounds confused.

“You thought I was to have no part of the sale of the house?” He looks over his shoulder to Brennan. “That’s how we wanted it to look. I didn’t want the house son. I only ever wanted you two to be happy. So, instead of calling you and having you come home. She decided to make video messages. You each have one in your box. She didn’t want you to watch her suffer while she was dying. So on her good days, she would send you messages. Knowing once she passed, you would come home eventually. Then and only then would she be able to try to make up for leaving you all those years ago. But we all know that nothing can make up for what we’ve done.”

“What I can do.” He takes my hands in his and caresses them like he used to do when I was a little girl. “For what it’s worth, I can promise you that, from this day forward, for as long as you will let me. I promise that I will always be here whenever you want me to be. I don’t expect to pick up where we left off. Because I know there’s no way I can make up for hurting both of you. But if you two will let me, I would very much like to begin again.”

Gabe

             
“I… I think that Brennan and I have a lot of talking to do before we make any decisions.” Jenna says softly. I can tell by the tone of her voice, that there is no way in hell that she is willing to forgive him anytime soon. Yet she still wants to show enough respect to the man sitting in front of her, she answers him in a polite voice. Brennan stands behind the couch looking down. He’s let out so many emotions today, I’m actually worried for him.

“I can respect that.” Robert nods but still doesn’t release her hands. I’m not sure if this is making her uncomfortable, but it sure has me on edge. He looks over his shoulder again before releasing her hands and standing. He walks toward Brennan. “Brennan, son.” He says, but Brennan remains quiet.

“Brennan. I truly am sorry for everything I’ve put you and your sister through.” He rests his hand on Brennan’s shoulder. This time Brennan doesn’t shrug it off. “If maybe, after you think things over,” He turns his head toward Jenna before back to Brennan. “And you have more questions for me. Or if there’s anything I can do to help make things right, I want you to know that I’m here son. I won’t be going anywhere. I had a few ends to tie up at the office today. Otherwise, I would have been here earlier.”

“Um. Thank you.” Brennan says softly. “I’m sure this isn’t over with.”

“No, I’m sure it isn’t.” He pats Brennan on his shoulder and turns toward us. “Bob, Patty. I know I’ve said it before, but I want to say it again. I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for my children. Pastor, I appreciate you being here as well.” Both set of parents nod in response. He turns to me.

“Gabe, I’m not sure this exactly if this is what you had in mind when meeting your future father in law. But I trust that as much as Brennan is protective of his little sister, I’m positive he’s made the right decision by giving you his blessing.” I’m really not sure what the hell I’m supposed to say to that, so I simply do what feels best. I hold Jenna a little tighter and kiss her cheek.

“Well, good night everyone.” He announces before dropping his head and walking out. As soon as he leaves, I can feel Jenna’s entire body relax in my arms. My worry for her grows tremendously. I look around the room before making eye contact with Drew. He seems to be feeling the same as I do by the look on his face.

“Mr. and Mrs. Johnson, I… um, thank you for staying here for this. I’m sure Jenna asked you to stay since we weren’t sure of how it was going to happen. I appreciate you staying for her.” Andrew stands followed by Grace, his wife.

“Son, we are here for the both of you.” He replies as he pulls Brennan in for a fatherly hug. “If you need anything, just let me know. Alright?” Brennan hugs him back and nods. He and his wife bid everyone good night before retiring to bed. Mr. and Mrs. Harper quickly do the same after Patty gives us all a good night kiss of course. No matter if we were at their house for dinner or to drop something off, she would always make us give her a kiss goodbye.

“So now what?” Matt asks looking around the room now that it’s just us including Ashley.

“I don’t know about you, but I’m beat.” Brennan says taking Ashley by the waist before looking around to each of us. “Did you guy’s select rooms yet? I know which room’s Jenna’s.” He looks at me when he speaks.

“What?” I shrug. “I haven’t done anything.” I wrap my arms around Jenna’s waist and lay my chin on her shoulder. “Yet.”

“Real funny man.” He flips me off. The guys begin laughing. Ashley pulls away from him and walks toward us. She takes Jenna’s hand and looks down at the ring that rests proudly on her finger.

“I’ve seen this in pictures, and I’ve seen it in person last week. But I have to say Jenna, it looks even better on your finger.” Jenna takes a step forward to embrace her in a hug. I follow. “Congrats guys.” She chokes.

“Awe, are we having a moment?” Matt states with sarcasm before he charges over to us and hugs us all from behind Ashley. It takes me no longer than five seconds for me to raise my head to look at Drew and Brennan before they are making their way over to us to follow. “Just think. You don’t have to worry about hiding shit form Brennan since he decided to go all noble and announce it for you.”

“Shut up Matt.” Brennan says before he pulls me away from the group. “I just wanted you to know, I meant everything I said earlier. But if you hurt her again.” He shakes his head. “So help me God Gabe, I’ll kill you.”

Resting my hand on his shoulder I reply. “Thank you Brennan. You know your sister means the world to me. You both do. I promise with all that I have, that I won’t hurt her. I love her.”

“Oh, he knows Gabriel.” Ashley says hugging my new fiancé and giving me a supportive wink. I reach my hand out to Jenna. She releases my sister and wraps her arms around me, where she belongs.

“Are you ready for bed?” She asks looking up to me with a special glow in her eyes. She never ceases to amaze me. I take her chin between my fingers before leaning down and kissing her softly, but decide to pull away quickly causing her to put a small pout on her lips. I tap her nose with my finger and chuckle.

“Actually, I was thinking about taking a walk on the beach. Is that okay?” Her frown shifts into a smile and she nods happily. She’s never been one to refuse the ocean.

~~~

“It’s so beautiful out here.” She says staring out along the shore. Of course, I haven’t taken my eyes off her since we left the house. I love the way her ring digs into my hand while holding hers as we walk along the beach.

“It is.” I answer smiling down at her. She turns to look at me.

“You’re not even looking.” She scolds placing her hand on my chest. I pull her into my arms and run the back of my hand along her face.

“I’m looking at everything I need to look at right here.” She wraps her arms around my neck and blushes. “Jenna Munson, are you blushing?”

“No.” Immediately she looks down trying to hide her face. “It’s the cool breeze.” I can’t help but laugh and kiss the top of her head.

“Okay Angel.”

“Gabe?” She asks, her blonde hair gently blows in the wind. I take a finger and tuck a strand behind her ear.

“What’s wrong?” I ask curious.

“Nothing.” Her eyes dart up to mine immediately.

“Your voice says otherwise.” Running my hands slowly up and down her back. I’ve gone entirely too long without her touch and I just can’t seem to get enough now. She remains quiet as she stares into my eyes. “Jems?” She bites her bottom lip nervously. “You know whatever it is, it’ll be okay, right?” She nods.

“It’s just this…” She looks down again.

“Hey.” I tilt her face up to meet mine. “What’s wrong?”

“This engagement.” She whispers. Suddenly I feel as if a weight has been pressed against my chest. I try to push it back.

“Angel, if you don’t want this, I under…”

“You are not taking this ring from me Gabriel Gonzales.” She reprimands with narrowed eyes. I can’t but help but let loose a small chuckle.

“Okay.” I kiss the tip of her nose. “The ring stays. So, what is it?”

“Well,” She begins playing with the hair at the base of my neck. I’ve discovered this is her favorite place to play with as well as mine, so I try to keep it just long enough to make her happy. Once I remember we were all acting crazy and stupid at a party and decided to shave our heads. All of us except Brennan of course. I thought Will and I were going to have to stay with his parents until our hair grew back. Jenna was livid. “What’s so funny?” She asks noticing my smile.

“Just a memory about my hair.” She smiles at first before tugging it and scowling.

“The party?” I nod. “God I could have killed you guys for doing that.”

“I know.” Chuckling and kissing her quickly again. “So… the ring?”

“Do you think it’s too soon?” The concern in her voice worries me. I’ve actually thought the same thing. There’s no doubt in my mind that Jenna’s the one. I don’t know what to say.

“Do
you
think it’s too soon?” I decide to take the cowardly way out and place the pressure on her. She worries her bottom lip and shrugs.

“I think…” Her blue eyes sparkle when she looks up at me. “I think it feels good.” Her lips curve up into the smile I love.

“I think you’ve successfully dodged the question Jenna. Don’t do that.” Fuck. I need to know if she thinks this is a mistake or not.

“Well, I don’t know.” She finally admits.

“Okay.” I think for a minute. “Let’s do this.” Turning her around in my arms and sitting pulling her down between my legs. “Since you won’t give me the ring back.” She shakes her head vigorously leaning back onto my chest in content. My arms wrap around her waist and I rest my chin on her shoulder. “And by your own admittance, you’re not sure if it’s too soon. So, let’s ask ourselves a few questions. Okay?” She takes a deep breath and nods so I decide to continue.

“You love me correct?” She nods. “And you want to spend the rest of your life with me?” Another nod followed by a dazzling smile. “And you think I’m the best guitarist around and you can’t imagine anyone else using their fingers on you the way I do?” She laughs before smacking me on my thigh. “What?” I ask innocently. “Okay, okay, I take back the guitar thing.”

“But not the finger thing?” She turns to me with a raised eyebrow.

“Nope. The finger thing stays.” I kiss her swiftly on her cheek. Her smile brightens up the sky. “Now hush. I’m not done with my interrogating.” She signals with a ten four before relaxing in my arms again. “Now, where were we?” I hold her tighter. “Right. So, how long have we known each other?”

“Just over seven years.”

“And for just over seven years, you’ve been madly infatuated with me correct?” She smacks my leg again. I can’t help but chuckle. “I refrain my question.”

“You should, because for just over seven years, you’ve been the one infatuated with me.”

“And you’re point is?” I kiss her cheek again. “I’ve never thought of anyone else the way I do you.”

“Can I ask a question? For your interrogation purposes of course.”

“Of course.”

“When did you buy it?” With her hand stretched out so it can shimmer under the dimming sky.

“Remember when we were in New York?” She stiffens and turns toward me immediately.

Yes.” I shrug. “But… Wait, that’s the night you came back to the after party with a black eye?” I nod. “Brennan said he turned the corner with a box and got your eye on accident.”

“That will be the only lie he probably has ever told you. Because if you remember, I refused to give you a reason. Remember?” She huffs. “That night was the night I asked for his blessing.”

“You’ve had this ring for almost three years?” She asks.

“I’ve had that ring for two years, eight months and um, thirteen days.” I admit. “But if I must be honest. I was planning on marrying you the day we met.” She takes my face in her hands and kisses me deeply, but not before I notice the tear that’s fallen.

“Where did you come from?” She pulls away to look me straight in the eyes.

“I’ve always been right here Jenna. You’ve just been keeping me away.” Her lips land on mine once again, but it’s me that pulls away this time. “What am I going to do with you?”

Jenna looks down at her hand that’s resting on my chest and smiles. Then when her eyes meet mine, she says. “You are going to marry me Mr. Gonzales.”

“Am I?”

“Mhmm. You are.” She runs her hands around my neck again. “And you are going to fulfill every promise you made to me this morning, every day, for the rest of our lives.”

“Hmmmm. I think I can do that.” I agree kissing her softly. “Let’s make a deal.” She sulks. “Oh stop that.” I smack her ass before standing her up and standing behind her. Once we’ve brushed the sand off of us, I pull her back into my arms. “You want to marry me.”

“Didn’t we just go through this?” She sighs.

“Yes, but just humor me here. You also, deep down, even though you won’t admit it, think it’s too soon since we’ve officially been together for a couple of weeks.” She drops her head and rests it on my chest. “It’s okay Angel. I know how it feels. But listen to me for a minute.”

“Listening.” She mumbles. I run my fingers through her hair.

“I can’t say I disagree with you about the timing. Even though I’ve known you were going to be mine a lot longer than you have. But what I’m trying to say is this.” I taking her face in my hands, I bring it to mine so I can see her eyes. “Why don’t we take this slow? No one said we need to have a set date. Right? I mean. Brennan said the other day that we act like an old married couple anyways.” She giggles.

“I was nothing until I met you. You made me…” I try to think of the right word, “whole. You are my best friend Jenna. There’s not one person in this world that knows me better than you do. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” A tear falls from her eye, I brush it away with my thumb.

“You are my best friend too. Even though I denied it all these years, you’ve been the reason I wake up in the morning. I look forward to seeing you with your hair all messed up from sleeping. It’s your reaction I look for whenever I want to do something stupid. You were the first person I wanted to see when I woke up...” Her face drops with sorrow. I know she’s meaning at the hospital. “You are the one person who knows me better than anyone else does. You know when I’m having a bad day, and you go out of your way to cheer me up.” She wipes a tear that I didn’t even know fell. She makes my heart swell. “Not a day goes by that I thank God for you Gabriel.”