Nights Embrace (Others of Seattle) (21 page)

“Yeah, banning the thought from my head as we speak
. But I will be calling Joey ‘Gramps’ from here on out.”

Trevor laughed, pulling her to him.
“One more thing.”

“Can it wait? I need you,” her voice was husky, her scent flaring to life.

He took a deep breath and nodded. Sooner or later he’d have to tell her the rest. Trevor hoped she would forgive him, but he couldn’t resist her any longer.

* * * *

As Roxy stepped outside of Trevor’s building, she was assaulted with an orchestra of sounds that were far too clear. Cars moving along the road, feet on pavement, conversations from across the street, and so many more. She leaned heavily against the wall and took a deep breath.

Scents rolled through her, things she could identify, but they were stronger and mingled. She rubbed at her nose.

As she blinked, Trevor moved into her line of sight.

“What the fuck?” she whispered
as she stared. Trevor was, without a doubt, the most gorgeous man she’d ever seen, but she saw so much more detail now. Her breath caught as she noticed the slight scar hidden in his eyebrow, and the way his dimple deepened when he smiled.

He explained,
“Your senses are heightened. They’ll be even stronger in wolf form. So take it slowly. You’re still you. Just stronger.”

“Stronger?” her brow arched.

“Yeah, stronger, love. I wouldn’t go arm wrestling your brother. He’d notice the difference.”

Her smile
dropped off her face as she remembered him being in the hospital. “Right. Well, I won’t be doing that any time soon. I need to bring him some coffee.”

“
Good plan. Come on. We’ll grab that and then head over. Later, before we go to Fiona’s, we might want to stop for breakfast.”

“What’s at Fiona’s? Not that I mind, but I am curious.”

He smiled softly. “I’m hoping she’ll have more answers for you.”

She started walking, thinking about all the things that were different now.
“How did you cope when you became…” her eyes swept to him and then back to the ground, “what we are?”

He
ran his fingers through his hair. “This is the part I should have told you sooner.” Trevor took a deep breath and reached for her hand. “I was married back when I was human. She died the day I was changed.”

Her eyes widened, and she squeezed his hand tighter.
“How?”

“After too many miscarriages, she finally carried a baby to term, but they didn’t make it
through the delivery.” A tear trailed down his cheek.

Roxy pulled him to a stop and caught his
face to look him in the eye. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“I
t’s okay. It was a long time ago, but that’s something I should have told you.”

She
wound her arms around his neck. “You can tell me anything, Trevor. I can’t imagine what you went through. I’m sorry.”

He put his forehead against hers and closed his eyes.
“That night I was drowning my sorrows in mug after mug of ale. I lost track of time and reality. A woman came on to me. She looked so much like Caera, I thought I was dreaming. I could hardly see straight.”

He rubbed his hand over his face
. “I was so drunk, and Dina lured me away from the tavern. Her Scottish accent came out when she tried to seduce me. I remembered my wife’s last words and I finally understood, but I couldn’t do it. I ran.”

Roxy’s head
cocked in question, but she didn’t say a word.

“Caera told me, ‘My cousin will take my place. Open your heart to her.’ Dina was her cousin. Caera knew she was ill, and I suppose she thought she was helping, but I couldn’t let her go.”

“Oh, Trevor. I’m so sorry.”

“It was dark, and the whole world was spinning. I fell, hit my head, and when I came to, a wolf attacked me. Only it wasn’t a wolf. It was Dina.”

“That fucking bitch!” Roxy growled, “I’m going to kill that skank if it’s the last thing I do.”

That surprised a laugh out of him.
“Oh, love, I don’t want you anywhere near her. She nearly took you from me. She will pay, but not at the risk of your life.”

“She nearly killed you
first,” Roxy fired back.

He shook his head.
“Not exactly. She didn’t do nearly as much damage to me as you, and it wasn’t on a full moon. She did it with every intention of claiming me as a mate.”

“That bitch was going to try to force mating?”

“It doesn’t exactly work like that. I don’t believe Dina could be my mate. Doesn’t matter now. She mated Boyd long ago.”

“
And I’m mated to you,” Roxy finished with a bright smile. “You knew it would happen.”

“Yes, I knew. I knew I
needed
you from the second I saw you. Not only physically, but all of you. I’ve never felt that before.”

A question formed on her tongue, but she couldn
’t bring herself to ask. She was afraid of the answer.

He
responded as if he read her mind. “No. I loved Caera, don’t get me wrong. It was a different love, in a different time.” He smiled sadly. “You are my heart, my
A Chroí.
Now that I have you, I couldn’t live without you. It hurt to lose Caera, but we were never soulmates.”

She opened her mouth, but the words died on her tongue.

“You don’t need to say anything. It was over a century ago. I know this is all overwhelming, but I promise to answer any question you may have.”

“Did I mention that I love you?” she asked softly.

He smiled, pulling her close. “A few times, but I will never tire of hearing it on your lips.”

“I love you.” She leaned up and
feathered a light kiss over his lips before pulling away. Roxy grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the Jitterhouse.

Dina stood at the window of their new condo, staring at the street below, contemplating what she could do about Trevor. As she watched, he happened to walk down the street with his arm wrapped around that little bitch. A growl rumbled free as she got up to chase them down.

Boyd stepped in front of her, blocking her path.
“If you go down there, you’re going to go against everything William told you. We are to wait for backup from the rest of the pack before engaging them. He wants that woman alive.”

“I want the bitch dead
! She was never supposed to mate Trevor,” she snarled back

Boyd stepped into her body, forcing her back against the wall.
“Doesn’t matter who she was meant for, you’re not meant for Trevor. You’re meant for me, in case you’ve forgotten who you are mated to.”

“You’re not worthy of me, you never were,” she answered coldly.

“Then why is it we fit so perfectly? We both want what we want and go after it. Our first priorities are always ourselves. That bastard you’ve pined over for more than a century has never once put himself first. What makes you think that either of you could ever be happy together?”

“He’s meant be mine. He always was. I saw him first.”

“Oh, Dina, you really are stupid. Mating is not about what you want, it’s about what is best for you. We are best for each other. That arse down there has never once cared for you, or about you. Why do you think he has always been so cold to you?”

These were a
ll logical arguments she had heard time and time again. She still refused to believe it. When Trevor first looked into her eyes, he had whispered the words, “
a ghrá
,” and she knew she was the one meant to take Caera’s place in his heart.

She missed the letters from her cousin, the very same ones that made her fall in love with Trevor. The big, brooding romantic who
did everything in his power to bring a smile to Caera’s face.

“You don’t understand, Boyd.
You never did. I don’t want Trevor. I want to break him, like he broke me when he refused what was promised to me.”

Boyd tangled his fingers in her hair, pulling her
head back. His eyes were cold and calculating. “You found him the night he lost his wife. Of course he wasn’t ready. That’s why you fell into my bed and became my mate, love. Not some arsehole who will never see you as he did your lovely cousin.”

“
I don’t love him anymore, and I’ve never loved you,” she spat.

“No, but you can’t live without me. Or don’t you remember?”

She did remember. Neither one of them were capable of love, but they were incapable of walking away from one another.

“You’re right, we are both ruthless
.” She kissed him hard and reached for his zipper. If she couldn’t hunt a little songbird, she could at least have some fun.

* * * *

Trevor felt Roxy’s whole body tense as she stepped through the coffee shop door. She looked up at him with wide terrified eyes as her breath caught.

“What do I tell her?” she whispered.

“Nothing.” He smiled back at her. “She won’t know anything is different if you don’t act different. Remember, you had good reason to be hiding out. So take a deep breath and order your brother’s coffee. You have a brilliant imagination. I’m sure you can come up with a cover story.”

“Right. I can do that
.” She put on a bright smile, and walked over to the counter. “Hi Skylar.”

Skylar
perked up, but a frown stretched across her face. “Where were you? I was starting to worry.”

She sighed.
“I know. I’m an idiot. We got back late. I was so inspired I wrote, when we weren’t making love.”

Trevor pulled her closer, nuzzling her neck as he splayed his hands on her
hips. He glanced up, meeting Skylar’s eyes. “I’m afraid I’ve been greedy with Roxy. It was my birthday and I couldn’t help but keep her all to myself.”

She licked her lips and nodded.
“I can see, and it looks good on you both. Enough to make any girl jealous.” Sighing, she hooked her hair behind her ear. “Are you heading over to see Mike?” She slapped her hand over her mouth as her eyes opened wide. “Please tell me you heard what happened.”

“Yes, I heard, this morning unfortunately. I’m bringing him a coffee, so why don’t you hook me up with his t
oo, and I’ll try to make up for being an awful sister.”

“Oh, please, when was the last time he was mad at you for more than like two minutes?”

“Never, but only because I have the best big brother in the world,” Roxy answered lightly.

Trevor squeezed Roxy tighter, guilt weighing in
. Regardless of what she said, he knew most of this could have been avoided had he not been so hell-bent on evading all interruptions the day before.

Roxy turned her head, capturing his lips in a soft kiss. She looked deep into his eyes when she pulled back and gave him a single arched brow.

“Aww, you’re already communicating with a look. I don’t know if I should be jealous or sick,” Skylar teased.

Roxy rolled her eyes.
“Jealous? You and Tyler have been doing it for years, long before you two finally hooked up. Which, by the way, was a long time in the making. So stop, Sky.”

“Fine, fine.” She sighed, finishing up the coffee. “Tell your brother I hope he feels better.”

“I will. Thank you.” Roxy gave her friend a hug and laid out a twenty. She grabbed their drinks.

Trevor grabbed his own.
“You have a good day, Skylar.”

“Oh, are you two coming to Poetry
Night tomorrow?” Skylar asked, her gray eyes twinkling as she looked to Trevor. “She writes the most amazing poetry, and she usually reads.”

Roxy blushed, glancing away.
“Up to him.”

“Oh, I say definitely. I wouldn’t miss Roxy’s words for the world.”

“Adorable.” Skylar fanned herself as she fell onto her stool with a dramatic sigh. “So fucking perfect. Aren’t you glad you snagged a good one?”

Roxy giggled.
“Ecstatic. Bye, Sky.”

Skylar called out. “Happy belated birthday, Trevor.”

“Thank you.” He gave her a charming smile.

Once they were outside, Trevor looked to Roxy.
“I told you not to worry. You handled that beautifully.”

She smiled weakly.
“Skylar can be oblivious. Mikey, he’s going to know.”

“Doubt it. You don’t look any different, Roxy. You need to relax. He’ll be happy you came to see him.”

“I hope you’re right.”

No amount of words
was going to convince her.

* * * *

Jordan slumped into the seat in the corner of the room. Against Mike’s warning, he stayed put. He needed to apologize to Roxy for… everything, and give her the one thing she’d asked of him for years. It was all he could offer.

Mike looked over and asked,
“You really done with the drugs this time?”

“Yes, definitely. Without a doubt. I found a better way to cope.”

“Leanan?” Mike’s eyes narrowed. “She enough to keep you from wrecking what Roxy and Trevor have?”

“Yes. I can
only hurt Roxy. She needs better than I can give her. Don’t worry. I’ve figured a few things out. Like the fact I need to find myself before I can make anyone happy.”

His brows drew together.
“What about Leanan?”

“It’s new, and she’s more like a therapist. She’s helping me sort my head out. I’m pretty sure she wants to help me, nothing more.”

Mikey shook his head. “I think I heard you say something grown up, again. Must be the drugs fucking with my head.”

Jordan snorted a laugh.
“Hey, asshole, I can change. It’s about time.”

“Damn straight. Too bad it couldn’t be back when it might
have made a difference.” Mike scrubbed a hand over his face. “I know Roxy says she’s fine, but I’m worried.”

Jordan nodded but then shook his head.
“It’s my fault she fell off the face of the earth. I shouldn’t have…” he took a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have done a lot of things.”

* * * *

Roxy stopped outside of her brother’s room to listen to Mikey and Jordan’s conversation. She looked up at Trevor who frowned intently at the closed door. His previous question about taking Jordan back floated through her mind.

With a heavy sigh, she pushed her way
inside. Trevor followed but gave her space. A musty scent followed him, and she realized it was doubt. She knew he was wondering about Jordan again, and she wanted to reassure him, but she knew words wouldn’t work.

“Hey, Rox. Please don’t kill Jordan. I think he may have grown a heart.” Mike sounded groggy
and slurred. A sharp chemical scent lingered near him. His lids were heavy, and one hand was curled over his lower abdomen.

Guilt settled in
, twisting her heart. She hated that she hadn’t been there for Mikey. A tear slipped free as Roxy set the drinks on the table. He took her hand.

“Sorry, Mikey. I should have had my phone. I sh
ould have known. I’m so sorry.”

“Awe, Sis
, don’t cry. I’m fine. It was an appendicitis. Nothing major.” Mikey put on a big dopey smile and squeezed her hand.

She
muttered. “That doesn’t make me feel any better. I completely disappeared.”

Roxy looked away
, only to focus on Jordan who watched her in quiet contemplation. His expression held resignation, defeat, and loss. One tiny little part of her wanted to pull him close and tell him it would be all right like she had so many times before.

There was one giant problem with that scenario.
She finally understood that exact reaction was what kept Jordan from letting her go, giving him false hope. Maybe one day he would heal and they could mend their broken friendship, but she was done trying to fix it for him.

“I’m sorry,” Jordan
’s words were soft but heartfelt. “For everything, Roxy.”

She wanted to ask, desperate to know what exactly he meant, but the words died on her tongue.

He dipped his head. “Don’t. You don’t have to say anything. I’ve been an ass. I know it. I’m trying to change.”

She opened her mouth to say something.

He held up his hand, and shook his head. “Wait, let me finish. Please. I need to say this.”

Roxy nodded, leaning back into Trevor who was tense, but
gave her what support he could by wrapping his arms around her waist.

Jordan continued.
“I’m changing for me. I need to be a better man. I’ll always cherish what we had, but I know I’m the one who fucked it all up. I don’t think I can ever make up for everything I’ve said and done. One day, maybe you’ll forgive me.”

With that he stood and walked out the door. Tears filled her eyes.
She spent years wishing he would come to his senses, but that goodbye was so much more final than she ever expected.

“If it helps,” Mikey told her, “he’s seeing someone who honestly seems to be getting him on the right track.”

“Good,” she whispered, not trusting her own voice. “I hope it works out for him. He needs someone special.”

Trevor relaxed slightly.

Mikey yawned. “You should go. I appreciate you coming, and thank you for the coffee. I feel better now that I know you’re all right, but I’m tired.”

“You sure?”

He nodded. “I’m fine. The pain meds are kicking in, and I’m going to pass out on you. I’ll be released tomorrow.”

“Then call me if you need me. Please. I have my phone.” She pulled it out of her pocket and waved it.

Mikey chuckled. “Good. I’ll call if I need something, but go. I need my beauty rest.”

She rolled her eyes.
“Good luck with that.”

Mike looked up at Trevor.
“You take care of Roxy. I don’t think those two Scottish asswipes are done looking for her.”

“I will do everything in my power to keep her safe,” Trevor answered solemnly.

* * * *

The elevator doors shut and Trevor turned to Roxy. He gave her a sad smile.
“Are you sure you don’t want to give Jordan another chance?”

She pulled away from him, her eyes blazing.
“Excuse me? Seriously?”

He dropped his gaze to the floor.
“I felt your pain when he let you go.”

“Fuck,” she
groaned and looked up at the ceiling. Roxy took a deep breath before letting it out slowly. “I’ve known Jordan since I was three. He’s hurting. He’s finally realized how much he’s been fucking up. I can’t help him fix himself. I can’t. I don’t want to, and I will never want him back. I don’t love him like that, not anymore. I’ve never loved him the way I love you. But yes, a tiny part of my heart will always be his. He was my first love, my first everything really. He’s not that boy anymore, and even if he were, I don’t want that boy back. I want you, and only you. My assurance has to be enough, because there’s nothing else I can say.”