Nic's Devotion: An Endless Series: Book One (31 page)

     Seth sighed and looked at me, his expression pensive.
“You said she wasn’t raped and that she’s mostly traumatized at killing her
father, if she’s not having episodes over your sexual activities I wouldn’t
bother kicking yourself over it. That girl has gone through hell and her life
has been lacking anything truly good, the last thing she needs is to be treated
differently. If you start analyzing everything you do around her she will
notice. We’ve already established that the girl isn’t stupid, and it will only
make her feel uncomfortable if you treat her like a fragile piece of glass. It
sounds like she’s made up of something a lot stronger.”

     When Seth got long winded he generally spouted
something deep and noteworthy and it was no different now. He was right; Carrie
deserved to be treated like a normal young woman. She’d missed out on her
entire teenage years; no friends or parties, no boyfriends―although, that
actually pleased me and I was an absolute ass that it did. If I started acting
different around her it would only make her assume that what I’d heard had
altered my view of her, and in the end that just might cause her more damage.

     I expelled a drawn out sigh, getting all that off my
chest made me feel less like hitting someone…not altogether, but at least I
wasn’t feeling homicidal any longer. “Thanks.” I expressed gruffly.

     “Sure, now let’s get this shopping shit done. I have a
feeling you have more on your list than a mattress. She’s going to be pissed.”
He gave a snort. 

     Yeah, I did, and yeah, she would. 

∞              
∞               ∞

     At eight o’clock I was standing by my truck watching as
Carrie made her way over. There was an uncertainty in her steps as well as
tension radiating off her frame as I helped her in. I stood in the open door as
she buckled up noticing that she was avoiding direct eye contact.

     Shit! What had happened? I thought we’d parted this
afternoon on a great note. If Nikki or someone else had bothered her again I
wasn’t sure what I would do, but heads were in definite danger of rolling.

     “Is everything okay?” I asked.

     Her gaze came my way but flickered down quickly as she
fumbled needlessly with her backpack. “Yeah, everything’s fine.” She replied in
a guarded tone. 

     Oh no it wasn’t. I wasn’t sure if it had something to
do with cold feet at me learning her past or if someone had bothered her, but
she was no longer alone and I was going to make her share. There was no way I
was going to allow her to pull away from me.

     “Carrie, I can sense that something is wrong, please
tell me what happened?” I almost begged her, but was able to keep my tone
matter-of-fact. 

     “Really, everything’s okay. Let’s just go.” She
repeated in the same guarded voice still not meeting my gaze. 

      Clueless on what to do to get her to talk I did the
first thing that came into my head. Reaching over and unbuckling her seatbelt I
spun her around so she faced me. Her expression was a display of shocked
confusion as I swooped down and captured her lips.

    Carrie’s mouth was open slightly in her surprise and I
took immediate advantage. Slipping my tongue in I tangled it with hers forcing
it to meet mine. She hesitated for only a brief second before pressing forward
eagerly and then we were sucking and nipping at each other hungrily. Desire
that I’d been trying to contain because of her past and inexperience poured out
of me as I devoured her wildly. Just as I had this morning.  

     Carrie held nothing back either as she stabbed her
fingers in my hair holding me close as her teeth gripped my bottom lip and then
suckled it ardently. My control completely shot I grabbed her hips and jerked
her forward until my cock pressed against the heat of her sex.

     “Wrap your legs around me.” Unable to wait for her to
comply I grasped her thighs lifting them over my hips. Thankfully, she locked
them there by clenching tightly and this rubbed me in just the right way
wrenching a groan from me in painful pleasure…painful because our clothes
really needed to go.

     I was way past my initial actions of trying to get her
to share her thoughts with me. I was now completely out of control and ruled by
my dick and what it needed. Gripping her luscious ass I situated her so that
she was wedged between the seat and my hips allowing me to hit her sweet spot
perfectly, at the same time it freed up one of my hands which went right to her
breast. Cupping the firm round orb I squeezed at the same time pushing against
her pussy. She gasped and whimpered and I dove even more fiercely into those
plump lips of hers while simultaneously rocking into her rhythmically.

     I don’t think I’d ever been this out of control before.
My thoughts were focused on getting her to experience her second ever orgasm
and for me to follow along after. I didn’t care that we were in a parking lot
where anyone and their neighbor could see us. I forgot that this was all new to
her and I was probably overwhelming her with everything I was doing. It also
completely slipped my mind that she wasn’t comfortable with being trapped
between two unmovable surfaces.

     That is until she ripped her mouth from mine to press
her face against my neck. She was gasping for breaths and in between she said
my name in a faltering husky tone. I pulled back immediately in dread.

     “Shit, Carrie, I’m so sorry. Are you alright?” Lifting
my hands to her face I tilted it back so I could see if she was going into
another episode. Thank God…her beautiful bright blue eyes were dazed and
languid but in the here and now.

     “I’m okay. Everything was overwhelming and I just
needed to catch my breath there for a second.” She said breathing heavily. The
bulb from the cabs interior highlighted the excited blush that stretched across
her face and neck.

     “Shit, I got carried away again. I feel like a dog in
heat trying to dry hump you right here in the parking lot for the entire world
to see.” I had to get control of myself around her or I would end up scaring
her away. Sure, I needed to treat her like a normal woman but she still needed
special care, and damn, it wasn’t like I was into exhibitionism. And I
especially didn’t want anyone seeing Carrie in that way.

     “Actually, I’m sort of glad it happened.” She said
softly. 

     Her quiet remark had my head spinning. “What?!” 

     She was finally meeting my eyes. “When you asked me
before if I was okay, well…I wasn’t. When you dropped me off earlier you gave
me a kiss on the nose. Prior to today every time you dropped me off you always
kissed me on the mouth. I was afraid that after hearing my story you felt
different toward me, that you saw me differently; maybe damaged or…I don’t
know…maybe as a killer.”

     Seth’s words from earlier hit me upside the head. He’d
been absolutely right. Carrie had noted right off that I’d acted differently
toward her and it had messed with her confidence, making her doubt my feelings.
That she thought I might actually think her a killer gutted me.

     I wrapped my arms around her. “Carrie, I never once
thought of you as damaged, and I definitely don’t think of you as a killer. I
can’t say that what I heard didn’t affect me, making me want to treat you a
little more carefully, but unlucky for you I have no control over myself when
it comes to you, hence, my jumping your bones in public.”

     Carrie huffed out a laugh into my chest and I smiled at
my ingenuity in taking care of our first couple crisis.

     “Come on; let’s get you back to your dorm room. I have
a surprise for you that I’m pretty sure you’re going to ream me out for.” I
tucked her back into her seat and shut the door on her frowning ‘
what
’
reply giving her a smile through the window. When I opened the driver’s door it
was waiting for me though.

     “What do you mean I’m going to want to ream you out?
What did you do?” She demanded with an adorable frown.

     I tapped her on the nose and started the truck. “You
have to be patient, because I’m in no hurry for your entirely justified
tirade.”

     Her eyes widened. “Oh, I’m
really
not going to
like this am I?” She remarked intuitively.

     I nodded gravely.

     I asked if she needed to stop at the cafeteria for
food, but she said that John had bought pizza and had shared it with the staff.
So ten minutes later I found a spot that wasn’t too far away from her dorm and
we head up quietly to her room. She kept giving me pinched looks like she had a
good idea what awaited her behind those closed doors. I was never in doubt of
her intelligence.

     Handing her back the key card she’d lent me Carrie
swiped the card to her door and with one last narrowed eyed look in my
direction she opened it and then went entirely still.

     I watched her anxiously unsure at how mad she would be,
I only knew there was no way I was getting around the mad. If she made me I’d
take everything back…well, some of it back…but there would be a fight involved.

     She continued to stand there quietly taking everything
in. I’d bought a new mattress for her like I’d planned; plus, two sets of
sheets, two pillows, and a big plush ocean blue quilt. However, that wasn’t
all; I’d also gotten her some throw rugs for the wood floor, a big bean bag
chair, a lamp for her desk, posters of sea life for her walls to brighten up
the room, a shelving unit that reached from the floor to the ceiling and
contained a multitude of baskets…some of which held a variety of other little
things I’d bought for her, and the piece de resistance…a laptop.

     That was going to set her off for sure.

     I had hopes that it might be the one item she focused
on making everything else look insignificant. If I had to take the laptop back
so she’d keep everything else I’d be okay with that. She didn’t know about the
cell phone I’d added to my plan for her. It really hadn’t been all that
expensive to include, just thirty bucks a month.

     Her continued silence was making me edgy. “I went to
the store to get you a blanket and a pillow because I didn’t see one with your
stuff we brought up, and everything else kind of found its way into the cart
before I even knew it. I know I got a little carried away, but it was like
letting a kid loose in a candy store. I couldn’t help myself. I kept all the
receipts so if you want me to take it all back I will. But I hope you won’t
make me, because I had a really fun time getting everything for you.” I stopped
my jabbering before I told her that I bought the blanket because it reminded me
of her eyes. Seth had already given me shit about it.

     “Carrie, come on, say something. This quiet before the
storm is killing me.” Fuck, I almost whined there.

     She finally turned allowing me to see her face, and her
eyes…brilliant with unshed tears. Double damn, I’d made her cry. I opened my
mouth to tell her I’d take it all back―she could spend most of her time
at my house anyway―when she reached out and gripped my arms.

     “I should be furious with you, I am furious with you.”
She said huskily.

     She was furious? She didn’t look furious; she looked
sad...and happy. This had to be a girl thing.  

     “But this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for
me and I don’t want to spoil your efforts with a…reaming.” She chuckled wetly
at that word.

     I breathed out an exaggerated sigh of relief that
wasn’t completely faked. “I can’t believe you’re letting me live.” 

     “It’s not all sunshine and roses just yet.” She said.
Her eyes were still a sad and happy combo, but now they also held
determination. “The laptop has to go. I can’t afford it, but I can make
payments on everything else.”

     I groaned at her words and shuffled her inside the room
since we were hanging out in the door frame. She walked over to the bed and
caressed the quilt, and then her eyes lifted to the poster on the wall
picturing a school of colorful fish. The look on her face caused my heart to
twist; wonder and pleasure mixed together. When I’d been buying everything for
Carrie Dr. Mathews words had been rolling around in my head about how Carrie’s
mother had only provided a bed a dresser for her when she’d left the
institution.

     I wasn’t going to allow her live deprived any
longer…material or emotional wise.

     “How about we negotiate. I’ll concede on the laptop but
you only pay half of what I paid. I don’t feel right having you pay for things
I forcibly bought you. Minus the laptop it really wasn’t all that much anyway.”
I had a card up my sleeve if she was going to be obstinate.

     She laughed and took off her coat hanging it on the
back of the desk chair. “Not much for you maybe. You have to realize that a
hundred dollars is probably a drop in the bucket for you, but its three-fourths
of the bucket to me.”

     I took off my jacket and set it over hers. I noticed
her gaze traveling over my chest and lower before she turned jerkily away. I
smiled at her obvious awareness of me, but it also set off responses of my own;
namely my chronic swelling.

     “With that logic it makes perfect sense to cut the
price in half. I won’t miss the half you don’t pay me and you won’t feel put
upon to pay what you can’t afford. They cancel each other out.”   

     She lifted one of the pillows off the bed and hugged it
to her body before turning back to me; a brow lifted in skepticism...the brow
with the mole. It set my body humming.

     “There’s some screwy reasoning, and it has the smell of
manipulation.” She sniffed the air and I couldn’t hold back my smile at her
gesture. She grinned mischievously. “Dark musky cologne, cocky attitude…” She
sniffed again. “…and unfaltering confidence. That’s definitely the smell of ‘Manipulation
by Nic.’”