Never Enough: The Vipers MC (18 page)

“Oh, God.” Her eyes filled with tears. “You have to find her.”

“I know that,” I said, holding back my temper. Like I needed her to tell me my business. My fists clenched by my sides. “We’re going out now. I have to leave Tony here—he won’t go to the hospital until we find her. And I’m gonna call one of the other guys over from the club to have him stay with you. Don’t worry about anything, okay?” I took her number and put it in my phone. “I’ll call you as soon as I know anything’s up. Don’t worry, they won’t come back here. They have what they want.”

Cindy shuddered a little when she heard that. I ran a hand over David’s head. “I’m gonna get your mama back for you. Okay? Don’t worry about anything.”

He nodded, eyes wide. I hoped I wasn’t lying to him.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Jess

Joe Green was Nikolai Ivanov. I tried to put the two names together. I remembered Grayson talking about him sometimes, back in the day. He wasn’t supposed to tell me his business, really, but there were times when shit hit the fan and he needed to confide in me. That’s what I was there for, or so I told him. So I told myself.

Nikolai. He was a bad, bad man. Not like I needed the reminder, since he shoved me in a trunk and drove off with me. I had no idea where we were going. I wasn’t even sure how long I’d been in there. At first, I’d tried to count off the seconds as a way to keep track of time and keep the panic from rising in my chest. If I could focus on counting, I would be all right. That hadn’t worked, and soon I’d lost track of the numbers. I couldn’t help but worry about my baby. What did he think when he came out to the living room and found Tony the way they’d left him? What did he think when he found I wasn’t there?

I can’t think about that. I’ll go crazy. It wasn’t productive. It wouldn’t get me out of there.

What would? I wasn’t strong enough. I could never overpower them if Tony couldn’t. And Grayson had no idea where I was.

Grayson. My heart ached. I had tried so hard to spare him the madness, but he was at the heart of it. It had taken seven years, but I’d managed to ruin his life despite my attempts to keep him safe.

What did he think? I didn’t have to ponder that question for long. He would be out for blood. I hoped he would get it, one day. I didn’t think I would see that day, though. Nikolai would kill me.

I wasn’t ready. There was too much to do. I was too young. It wasn’t fair. All that and more went through my head. One thought stood out above the rest: I loved Grayson, and I had already lost so many years with him. I had to make up for that. It wasn’t fair that he would come back into my life for such a short time, just for me to leave him.

Would he ever know why I left? I didn’t think so, since Tony was probably dead. I remembered all the good times with him, especially when we were kids. He always defended me, protected me, treated me like a little sister. And I couldn’t do anything to help him. If it hadn’t been for me, he would have been okay. They attacked him because he tried to help me. And I couldn’t do anything for him.

A cry escaped my throat, and I gave way to it. If they didn’t like me crying in the trunk, so be it. I didn’t know who drove or who sat in the car. They would have to deal with hearing me cry. It was payment for putting me in the trunk.

I cried for Tony, remembering the time he threatened to beat up my father for me when he gave me a hard time about coming home too late. I had been hanging around with Grayson and Tony, of course—a fact which only made my father angrier, as he didn’t like me spending time with “wild” boys. I was just as wild as they were, but he didn’t want to hear about that. He thought they were a bad influence, when really, I gravitated toward them because I was wild and needed somebody to be wild with.

I might not have been wild on the outside, the way some girls were. I was never promiscuous, never did drugs or drank. I rarely even broke curfew. But I had a wild heart. I wanted to do all those things—if anything, it was Tony who kept me on the straight and narrow. He took better care of me than my father, and was probably better than any brother I could have had. The first time I tried a cigarette, he railed against smoking for hours. Of course, he was already a smoker. “I don’t wanna see you hooked on these things!” he’d yelled, throwing the pack into the river that ran not far from our neighborhood. We used to hang out along the old, unused docks. I was sure they could hear him on the other side of the river, he’d yelled so loud.

Another time, a rival club member had decided to go after me. Instead of Grayson fighting the guy, Tony had stepped up to protect his “Lil Sis,” as he used to call me sometimes. He’d protected my honor, he said, so nobody would think I was just some skank, up for grabs to whoever paid attention to me. It was a lesson nobody in our neighborhood soon forgot, as Tony made sure everybody knew I was spoken for. There was a time of two when I’d wondered if Tony might have a crush on me, but it became clear that he really just wanted to protect me like a brother. I would never forget that.

And I would never forgive myself. How could I allow him to suffer for me like that? I used to wonder sometimes if he would ever do something crazy like get himself killed over a fight for me, but that was years earlier. I didn’t expect it to happen when we were adults.

I pounded on the inside of the trunk’s hood, rage pulsing through me. I was angry by then, so angry. Furious. How dare somebody come into my life and try to take what was mine, the people I cared most about? I hoped they pulled over to tell me to shut up. I just hoped they did.

Not they. He. Nikolai. I tried to remember what Grayson had said about him. He never went into specifics—he tried to keep me as far away from the grisly parts of his life as possible, and I understood that. I preferred it that way. It was easier to watch him walk out the door without knowing exactly who he faced when he went out there. I’d already worried enough back then.

I should have known it was he who called me all those years ago. Nikolai was the only name that kept coming up again and again when Grayson talked about the people he worried most about. Not that he was afraid of Nikolai—just of what he could do.

But Joe Green? How could I have guessed that? What were the odds of a friend of Cindy’s knowing him, and of Cindy recommending him? It was like some massive karmic joke. I must have really pissed off somebody many centuries earlier if I deserved such a hilarious twist of fate. He must have known me, must have seen me on his security camera and put it all together right away. No wonder he’d been so eager to give me the money. Maybe he’d hoped I would lead him to Grayson all over again, though it wasn’t as if he couldn’t have found him if he’d tried. The Vipers weren’t exactly unknown in town. Why had he waited all that time? What did it have to do with me?

I banged on the hood, on and on, until my arms ached. Then I kicked. I was fully aware that I might get myself tied up for all my efforts—he was good enough to leave my hands and feet free. He could just as easily change his mind. It was a risk I was willing to take.

Within what couldn’t have been more than a mile, I sensed the car pulling off to the side of the road. I realized I didn’t want it to. What would he do to me? I heard two motorcycles pulling up behind the car. The pigs who had killed Tony. I wished I could give them a taste of their own medicine. I felt around the trunk, hoping against hope for a crowbar, a wrench, anything I could use as a weapon. They’d cleaned the trunk out before dumping me inside—it might have been a rental, for all I knew.

The hood popped open, and I blinked against the bright sunlight. We were on a fairly deserted road—I already knew that, thanks to the lack of traffic around us, and the way we didn’t stop and start. No lights, no traffic.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” That voice. It made my skin crawl. “I know you think you’re being a clever girl, but the joke’s on you. There’s nobody out here to hear you. There’s nobody to see you. I wouldn’t even have taken the chance of pulling over if I had thought anyone would see me do it. You think this is my first rodeo?” He sneered.

Only slightly less repulsive than his voice were his eyes. They were cold, empty, dark voids, just as they’d looked when he put me in the trunk. I almost hated holding eye contact with him, but I wouldn’t have broken it for anything. I wanted him to know I wasn’t afraid.

It was cold outside. I scrambled. “It’s freezing in this trunk,” I said. I wasn’t wearing a coat or even a heavy sweater, only a t-shirt and jeans. I’d taken off my cardigan while talking with Tony. “Can I have a blanket or something?”

“I don’t have a blanket.”

“Your coat, then? I know you have to have heat in the car. Please. My fingers are starting to go numb.”

“Blow on them.” He reached up, about to close the trunk.

“Please!” I nearly shrieked it. “I’ll go crazy in here. I won’t stop banging. I’ll get somebody’s attention. I will. Please, give me something. Anything. Or let me sit in the back.”

He laughed his high, almost wheezing laugh. “You can’t be serious,” he snarled.

“I am. I won’t cause trouble, I swear. I just need to be somewhere with heat. I’m so cold. Please. I’ll behave. I mean, what could I do? Your guys are behind us. They’ll be able to watch me.”

Nikolai appeared to think this over, his eyes narrowing. He reminded me a snake about to strike. I half expected fangs to show over his bottom lip.

After glancing at his men, who shrugged, he turned back to me. “I guess we can manage that,” he said. “But you have to promise to be a good little girl. Will you?”

I could have thrown up at the words he used. “Yes. I promise. Just sitting up and feeling the heat on my hands will be enough.”

“I’ll heat your hands.” One of his two pals. Both of them laughed nastily, and my skin crawled again. They disgusted me beyond words, beyond anything I’d ever felt
. I dare you to put my hands anywhere near anything belonging to you
, I thought.
Wait and see how long you would still have whatever it is
.

“Enough.” Nikolai’s voice was like a whip, sharp enough to stop his men in mid-laugh. He turned to me with an apologetic smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Forgive them. They’re ignorant men. Not like me.” He held out his hands, and I had no choice but to take them as he lifted me from the trunk. I tried not to shrink back at the touch of his skin against mine.

He led me to the car, opening the back passenger door. “Back here. Don’t even think about sitting up front with me. That’s all I would need—you grabbing the steering wheel.” I hadn’t expected to sit up front, so it was no great loss for me. I knew he wasn’t stupid. He wouldn’t make it that easy.

I sat in the back, already grateful for the warmth of the car’s interior. Nikolai slid behind the wheel. “Buckle up for safety,” he said, smiling tightly. “I don’t want anything happening to you back there.” The click of the car’s locks told me I wasn’t going anywhere. He controlled the locks from the driver’s side door. I obliged, fastening my belt before he pulled off the shoulder.

“Where are we?” I asked.

“None of your business.” He glanced at me in the mirror. Our eyes met. I held his gaze out of defiance until he had to look back at the road.

“Considering the way you kidnapped me, I think it’s my business. I don’t see the harm. It isn’t as though I have the chance to contact anyone.”

He looked at me again, this time as though he were considering my statement. I wasn’t lying—I’d left my phone at the apartment, sitting on a table. I didn’t have it in my pocket, the way I normally would. Short of sending up a smoke signal, I was screwed.

“We’re on the back roads of New Jersey,” he said. “I wanted to avoid the parkway, of course. I don’t trust you.”

“You don’t trust me? What would I do? You have me outnumbered, for God’s sake. Don’t act like I’m the bad guy here.” I couldn’t help raising my voice out of sheer indignation.

“Easy! Temper, temper. I can see why you two fought so often.” How did he know so much about Grayson and me? I assume we were who he talked about. What was it? Where did the obsession come from?

“And then what? After we reach wherever it is you’re taking me, then what do you plan on doing?”

“That’s for me to know and you to find out,” he said, his voice almost a singsong rhythm.

I smirked. “Isn’t that a little juvenile, even for you?”

“Watch your mouth,” he snarled. He could turn on a dime, which told me his nicer moods weren’t authentic. “You’d do well to remember who’s in charge here. I don’t need your shitty attitude.”

“Wow. Sorry.”

“No, you’re not.”

“You’re right. I’m not.” I folded my arms. “Why should I be sorry? Why shouldn’t I give you my so-called shitty attitude? Look what you’re doing to me. Look what you’ve done already. You probably killed one of my oldest and dearest friends back there. And for what? Some money I owed you? He had nothing to do with it.”