My Life As a Medium (23 page)

I cannot possibly list all the strange phenomena that I experienced during that year, but the next story will prove that the sound did not come from this dimension.

I was giving healing to one of my patients, and her friend was sitting in the garden, just outside the healing room. It was a lovely day, and I decided to leave the french windows open so that we could enjoy the cool breeze.

I switched on the tape recorder. All was peaceful. Suddenly, there was an incredibly loud noise outside. Looking out of the window, I saw a police helicopter circling the area at roof-top height. The friend who was in the garden ran into the healing room, frightened to death. The helicopter continued to circle for a long time; we couldn’t talk – our words were drowned out by the noise.

Later, when I had finished healing, I rewound the recorder and played it back. The sound of the woodpecker had completely drowned out the noise of the helicopter. I will let you draw your own conclusions.

A slightly different type of phenomenon happened
the day I took a new tape from its plastic wrapper and put it in the recorder ready for my next healing appointment. When I played it back I found myself listening to a conversation that I had had with a journalist three months previously. The only recorder in the room at the time had belonged to the interviewer.

Having decided to buy a computer, I spent quite a lot of time tearing my hair out, and sometimes losing a whole day’s work because I hadn’t the ability to find what I needed in the maze of ‘Help’ menus. They didn’t help me at all. Eventually, I managed to understand the basics, which made the task of writing a whole lot easier. But the spirits were at it again, and information that I had forgotten appeared on the screen, along with other personal messages about my life. It seemed that there was nothing they could not infiltrate.

I worked feverishly that year, determined to finish the book before I met my Maker, because it was quite apparent to myself and everyone close to me that I was very ill indeed.

When I had written the last words, and the manuscript had been posted to my agent and publisher, I allowed myself the luxury of thinking about myself, determined to face the future with positivity, no matter what the outcome.

The delivery of the book also coincided with the end of my second marriage.

I was admitted to hospital in January 1992. The tests that were carried out showed that, without open heart surgery to replace my calcified aortic valve, I would die. I was told to go home and think about it before making a decision. There really wasn’t much to think about! My quality of life was so bad, I felt I had nothing to lose. The plus side was that my heart was healthy enough to have the operation.

Not only did I have to come to terms with my possible demise, but circumstances were such that I was going to lose my home at the same time.

Throughout my life I have always tried to make a negative situation work for me, and I decided that this would be a good time to try out all the exercises and advice I had given to my patients in the past. It is always easy to hand out advice when you yourself are healthy, but I began to wonder if it would work for me when I was so desperately ill.

In the past I had helped patients who were about to have operations by teaching them how to communicate with their own bodies, to cut out most of
the shock factor. I decided to work with my own mind and body in this way. First of all, I interrogated doctor and surgeon friends, and forced them to tell me the truth about the open heart procedure. When I had the whole picture, I mentally carried out the process, step by step, every night. I was determined that there was no way my body was going to have a nasty surprise. As time passed I was given, mediumistically, extra bits of information about the operation.

I also energized my body through exercises and meditation so that it would have the best possible chance of recovery. It may sound gruesome, but the method gave me such peace of mind that I found I could not wait to get to bed every night. At the same time, I was not only facing the reality of the situation, but also realizing the benefits of my own exercises, which enabled me to leave my body to fend for itself whilst I floated off into another dimension.

In the past many of my patients had told me how grateful they had been for the tuition and the exercises; now I was experiencing it myself, under the most dire circumstances, and was delighted to find that it worked! I was also aware that my mother was with me at all times, and felt the enormous comfort of my spirit team. The energy that surrounded me was fantastic.

I was also pleased that I had found the strength to get rid of all the negativity that had surrounded me for so long. Through my own studies, I have seen the effect it has on the immune system, causing the most
serious disease in the mind and body; no matter how much healing is given, this continues until the root of the problem is removed.

My family and friends set up a healing circle, and Michael Bentine called to say that he had also formed a circle for me, so I felt very secure when I entered the hospital for the operation.

I arrived in the late afternoon, and was to be operated upon early the following morning. I had an extraordinary feeling of peace, so the healing certainly seemed to be working, and I had great faith in the surgeons – both in this world and on my spirit team. What more could I want?

There were one or two things that had happened during my own mental operations that I wanted to verify. One of the nurses told me that she would be a spectator at my operation, so I told her what I had seen clairvoyantly, and asked if she would let me know whether I had been correct. It was important to me, as my study of the mind is an ongoing factor.

I have often been asked if I was afraid, and I can honestly say that I wasn’t. I was not being courageous, it was simply that through my career as a medium and healer I had lost the fear of death. I had also seen so much suffering in others, and had experienced it myself, that I knew I did not want to have a poor quality of life, if I could be bouncing around happily somewhere else.

There was one episode that amused me. My family had gone, and I was waiting outside the X-ray
department for some final checks. There were several men and women waiting with me, but trying to converse with them was impossible because they were all Greek. One man in particular was in a terrible state, and I found myself holding his hands and comforting him. He could speak only a few words of English, and I thought how awful it must be to have to undergo this type of surgery in a country other than your own. Later, I mused that he would probably get through it and I would die.

I woke up in intensive care, lined up with several other people, and I saw that we each had our own nurse sitting at the bottom of the bed. My first words were, ‘Am I going to live?’ So that worry had definitely been in my subconscious somewhere! My nurse smiled at me, and told me that I was doing better than everyone else. I’m sure all the patients were told the same thing, but it was nice to hear. I don’t know what nationality she was, but she was warm and caring, and looked to me like an angel. I have always been sorry that I was not able to thank her for what she did for me. Those nurses are so dedicated, and I wonder if they are ever aware of the deep gratitude the patients feel at their first sight of them. Even though I was in a drugged state, I could see the man I had comforted. We had both survived.

Within a few days I was walking up and down the corridor of the hospital, and meeting other patients doing the same thing. My Greek friend seemed to be doing well, and he smiled every time we passed one another. It was not long before I found out that heart
operations are quite commonplace these days. There is a certain comfort in numbers, and the fact that there were so many patients recovering at the same time as myself removed the feeling of isolation.

The young nurse who had been a spectator at my operation was able to confirm my clairvoyance.

I had been in the hospital for three days when, one morning, I woke to find the whole room filled with a deep blue haze – so deep that I could not see the door. The energy it gave out was amazing, and I felt so uplifted that I experienced the familiar feeling of levitation, even though my body was lying on the bed. The healing circles were obviously working hard for me, and I send my deepest thanks to all who played a part in my healing. Nine days after the operation I was ready to leave.

I was told that I must exercise as much as possible every day. It just so happened that my return home was also the beginning of a heat-wave – in May! But I did my best; at first walking round and round the garden like a demented fox, and then two weeks later venturing out over the fields at the back of the house. It was very hard work, but I was determined to follow all the instructions I had been given, as I had to prepare myself for the launch of
Mind Waves
the following January.

In between the exercise routines, I found that I could release myself from the pain by way of meditation, and could link in with my healing network to give masses of absent healing. Judging by the positive response we were receiving through the mail, it
worked. It is amazing how much pain one can bypass with this system.

However, strange things were happening to me. Black mists were obliterating my sight, sometimes lasting for fifteen minutes. It was quite frightening. Also, instead of the pain decreasing, it was getting worse. None of this made any sense. It was also very depressing. Even worse, my local GP at that time did not want to know, and made it quite evident when he called, by giving me a lecture on time wasting! So I tried to carry on, hoping that my condition would eventually improve. It didn’t. Gradually, my arms and neck became immobile, and I was in such agony that I was beginning to look like a walking corpse. Michael Bentine visited me at that time, and did not think I would survive. Neither did I!

In the midst of all this I had to leave my home and find somewhere where I could take all the animals. Moving home at the best of times is dreadful, so you can imagine the trauma, especially as I could do nothing to help myself. I was also extremely miserable, as it was the first time in my life that I had rented someone else’s home. It just did not feel right. I began to wonder what I had done to deserve this. And another thing. Where the hell was God!

I had spent the last two years making my healing room into a very lovely blue haven for all of my patients, and when I turned my back on it for the last time it felt just like leaving my home in Sutton all over again. I felt, yet again, that I had left a part of me behind.

Although my new home was set in lovely surroundings, the house itself was cold and uninviting. It was a typical rented house, and had not been used as a real home for years. I suppose I could have overcome this but I was racked with pain, and felt as though I had boiling oil in my chest and back. Lying in bed was a nightmare, as I could not shift from one position to another without further agony.

After five months, it became obvious to everyone concerned that something was terribly wrong. Apart from the pain, the black shadows that passed over my eyes were becoming more frequent, and lasting longer.

I visited my heart surgeon. He took one look at me and told me to book into the hospital the next day. I was so relieved.

When my second operation was over, my surgeon visited me and told me that he had had to remove every piece of the wire that had been used to join the sternum, as it had all corroded. I was told that it was very unusual for this to happen, as titanium, which is practically corrosion-resistant, is used frequently in surgery for this reason. I later spoke to one or two scientist friends, who told me that the only thing that could do this to titanium was electricity, and that my healing power had obviously caused the damage. This all made sense to me. The electricity had caused a circuit, creating heat, which had eventually corroded the titanium and that was why it felt like boiling oil. I’m sure that I’m not the only person this has happened to, but it is certainly very rare. The transformation
was immediate, and for the first time in five months my body was free of pain and I felt that I had a future.

Six weeks later I was on television promoting my book, and continued with the publicity tour.
Mind Waves
was a bestseller. All three books were bestsellers, in both hardback and paperback, and I know that I could never have achieved this without spiritual help and guidance.

There are many reasons why I have told you this part of my very private experience. One is that my readers all over the world have become part of my family, and love to hear the latest news. Also, at a time when they wanted to see more of me, they were seeing less; although I very rarely cancelled appointments, I had cut them down. I did not want to go public with my story at the time, as it would have taken away the peace and quiet that my family and I so desperately needed. As a result explanations were perhaps unsatisfactory, and left some people feeling they had been let down. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Janet and I worked all through that very difficult time, and the end results proved that we were on the right lines.

The second reason is far more important. I have received so many letters from people telling me that either they, or a member of their family, had decided against open heart surgery because they were too scared to face the operation. Even though I urged them to go through with it, there were some I could not reach, and they died. To this day, I cannot help
thinking of the terrible waste of life. My own story was so unusual that it can be dismissed. The fact is that in two days you are up and about, and looking forward to a healthy future. The pain factor gradually decreases, and in three months you will know that it has all been worth it. There is also a great bonus. You come face to face with yourself, and realize that never again will you ever take your life for granted. Neither will you allow anyone to take you for granted.

If you have been told that you have to have heart surgery to save your life, take the gift with both hands, and thank God that it is available.