Mother For His Children, A (9 page)

* * *

Ruthy made an extra-large breakfast the next morning. It may be many days before Jack was able to find a full meal again.

“There's one piece of schnitz pie left,” Martha said as she took the platter of ham to the table. “Do you think Jack would like to have it?”

“Let's wrap it up and send it with him for his lunch,” Ruthy said. “We can make ham sandwiches with some of these biscuits, too.”

“Can I do that?” Nancy dropped the flatware she was holding on the table with a clatter and rushed up to Ruthy. “Can I fix his lunch?”

“After you finish setting the table.” Ruthy sliced extra ham while Martha and Waneta put the rest of the breakfast on the table.

When the men came in from the barn, breakfast was ready. After the silent prayer, Jack gazed at the food on the table and turned to Ruthy.

“Thank you, ma'am, for this fine spread.”

“We didn't want you to start out on your travels with an empty stomach.”

“Well, there's no danger of that around here.” Jack took the bowl of fried potatoes from Levi and piled them on his plate.

“Where will you head from here?” Levi asked, filling his own plate.

“I'll head out to the state highway and try to get a ride from someone going south. I've had enough of this cold weather.” Jack grinned. “Somewhere around Nashville or New Orleans, I'll head west.”

“What kind of work do you think you'll find in California?” Elias emptied the dish of potatoes and Ruthy rose to take up more from the stove.

“They grow produce out there year-round.” Jack took a bite of his ham. “They always need workers to pick something or weed something or plant something.”

“I read in my schoolbook that they grow oranges there.” David stirred maple syrup into his oatmeal.

“Yep, you're right, young man. There are groves of orange trees, and oil wells.”

“And the ocean?” David looked up from his oatmeal.

Jack's smile grew soft. “Yeah. The ocean. That's one thing I've missed about New York. Going to the seaside in the summer.”

Ruthy exchanged glances with Levi. How had their talk last night turned out? She had hoped Jack would decide to go back home instead of to California.

When the meal was finished, Jack stood next to the door as they said goodbye, looking ill-at-ease.

“You don't have to go,” Levi said. “Like I told you last night, you can stay here and work. I can't pay you, but you'll have a place to live and food to eat.”

Jack glanced at the table and rubbed his belly. “It's a tempting offer, but no.” He flashed a grin at Ruthy, a different man than had taken shelter in their barn three days ago. “I'm a traveling man, and it's time to be on my way.”

With that he gave a little wave, and walked out the door, slinging a bundle with some extra clothes and Nancy's lunch over his shoulder.

“Will he ever find a home,
Dat?
” Jesse slipped his hand into Levi Zook's.

Levi shook his head, his wet eyes matching Ruthy's own. “I don't know, son. All we can do is pray for him. The rest is in the Lord's hands.”

Ruthy watched Jack, a lone dark figure against the white snow, as he walked down the lane to the road. Would he remember the story of the Prodigal Son? Would he ever come running to his Father's welcoming arms? All he had to do was to repent and ask for forgiveness, and the Lord would welcome him.

The icy shield of her heart cracked as she realized the direction of her thoughts. The Lord expected her to forgive as He did.... He wanted her to forgive Elam and Laurette.
Ne, Lord, ask me anything but that....

 

Chapter Nine

R
uthy hurried to get the ham-and-potato casserole in the oven in time for dinner.
Ach,
what a busy morning Mondays brought! But the morning's work was nearly done, with Waneta hanging the last of the washing while Ruthy fixed dinner.

As she slid the four loaves of bread into the second oven, Ruthy decided it was time for a short break with a cup of cocoa. By the time it was ready, Waneta would be back inside and ready for a rest, too.

Stirring the milk, sugar and cocoa on the stovetop, Ruthy counted the days she had been in Indiana. She had arrived on Tuesday, the twelfth of January and today was Monday, February eighth. Nearly four weeks. In that time they had weathered three snowstorms, the last one coming just two days after Jack Davenport had walked out of their lives. They had been snowed in for three days. Today was the first time Levi had let the children go to school since last Tuesday, and he had taken them himself in the sleigh, not trusting the
Englisch
school-bus driver.

So, four full weeks here, and the household routine was beginning to live up to her
mam's
standards. Levi appreciated her work, for sure. He often thanked her after the evening meal, or when one of the boys commented on a replaced button or mended trousers, but other than that he didn't speak to her at all. Was he sorry he had hired her and brought her here?
Ne,
it didn't appear so. But did her presence here remind him of the wife he had lost?

Ruthy moved the hot cocoa off the heat as she heard Waneta coming into the back porch. Now she was a different girl! Saturday afternoon Reuben Stoltzfus had come calling, even though many roads were still blocked with snow and no one else was visiting. He had spent the afternoon with them, and then driven Waneta to the young folks' gathering at the Beacheys that evening. Waneta's lighthearted humming had filled the house for two days.

“Everything is hung up.” Waneta came into the kitchen with a smile as she saw Ruthy pouring the hot cocoa into waiting mugs. “The clothes will freeze in a hurry out there today.”

“
Ja,
and dinner is in the oven. I thought we'd take a bit of a sit-down before getting the rest of the meal together.”

“That sounds
wonderful-gut.
” Waneta took her cup to the table, and Ruthy joined her on the bench facing the windows.

Snow covered the barnyard, but bright sunshine made the farm look like a wonderland.

“Such a beautiful day, with that blue sky,
ne?
” Ruthy took a sip of her cocoa.

“Ja.”
Waneta turned her cup in her hands. “Ruthy, do you mind if I ask a question?”

“Of course not.”

“Did you ever have a boy who...well, who wanted to spend time with you?”

Elam. Ruthy's heart clenched. Would she ever be able to think of him without remembering his betrayal?

“I did. Once.” More than once. Elam had courted her for eight years.

“Did you feel like you could fly?” Waneta's voice was wistful as she gazed out the window, her chin on her hand.

“
Ach, ja.
Like I could fly over the clouds!” Ruthy laughed as she said it. She could remember those feelings, if she put the last year out of her mind. “And just why do you ask?”

Waneta's face reddened. “No reason, just...”

“Just that you enjoyed a certain young man's visit Saturday?”

“It was
wonderful-gut,
wasn't it? Did you see how he played with the little boys so sweetly, and talked to
Dat
about farming....” Waneta sighed. “Do you think
Dat
likes him?”

“
Ja,
for sure he does.”

“He didn't look too happy when Reuben was here.”

“Well, think about how he's feeling. Say he has a sweet heifer calf he's raised—bottle-feeding it, giving it the softest hay for its bed, protecting it from all kinds of weather. How would he feel if another farmer came by and asked him to sell that heifer calf? What would he do?”

“I'm no heifer calf, Ruthy,” Waneta said, but she smiled. “He'd want to know if the farmer would give the calf a good home. If he'd feed her well and keep her safe.”

“
Ja,
for sure he would. Would he do any less for his daughter?”

“
Ne,
he wouldn't.”

“Your
dat
loves you, and he won't feel right about any young man who comes to visit his daughters. It's Reuben's job to change his mind. If Reuben is the wise young man I think he is, we'll be seeing a lot more of him in the next few months.”

“Is that what your young man did with your
dat?
”

“
Ach, ja.
Elam was at our house so often
Mam
set a place at table for him just like he was one of the family.” He
was
part of the family....

“What happened?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why didn't you marry him?”

Ruthy felt her mouth quivering even though she tried to keep a smile on her face. “He decided he'd rather marry someone else.” She stood quickly and took their empty mugs to the sink. “That's the way it happens sometimes.”

“Perhaps you'll meet someone else. Someone here in Indiana.” Waneta followed her to the sink to wash the dishes from their cocoa.

“I don't think so.” Ruthy steadied her voice. “Sometimes God calls a woman to help others rather than have their own homes. That's why God brought me here, don't you think? This is the work He has for me.”

Waneta dried the cups in silence while Ruthy scrubbed the pan she had heated the cocoa in.

“How do you know?” Waneta dried the pan while Ruthy took the perfectly brown loaves out of the oven. “Perhaps He brought you here to meet the husband He has for you.”

Stomping boots in the porch told Ruthy the boys and Levi were coming in for their dinner. She hurried to open the quarts of beans to heat up, but her mind was still on Waneta's comment. Ellie and Annie had mentioned the same thing—that perhaps God had brought her here to find the husband He had for her.

She glanced up just as Levi Zook came in the door, laughing at something Elias had said, his face ruddy from the cold February air. When he saw her watching him, his laughter changed to a smile. A warm smile of greeting, just for her.

* * *

Levi sorted through the letters he had picked up at the post office in Emma when he took the children to school, letting Ruthy and Waneta set the table around him.

Ruthy moved back and forth as if he didn't exist, but he was aware of each movement she made. As the weeks passed, he appreciated her more than he thought possible. She cooked well, managed the housework without any complaint, worked well with the girls and treated the children like they were her own. But he wouldn't let his thoughts go any further.

He opened the bill from the feed store, but the paper could have been a blank sheet. His attention was captured by the efficient woman who leaned around him to place a casserole on the table. She had made herself a
kapp
that fit in with the ones the women in Eden Township wore, and had changed the tucks and folds of her dress also. He hadn't expected her to live according to the
Ordnung
here.

Was she happy? He didn't dare watch her closely enough to find out, but it seemed so.

“Ruthy,” Sam said, sliding along the bench to make room for her, “sit by me.”

“
Ja,
Sam.” She smiled at him and let her hand rest on his head as she passed. “As soon as the food is all taken up, I'll sit next to you like I always do at dinner.”

Levi stared at the bill, watching the numbers on the paper double and move sideways until the whole thing was a blur. Sam had liked Ruthy from the beginning, but he had caught the look in the boy's eyes as Ruth had caressed him. The five-year-old loved her.

And why not? Why shouldn't he love the woman who cooked for him and cared for him, and took the time to look at his drawings and listen to his constant stories?

He shoved the bill back into the envelope and leafed through the other envelopes.

“Ruth, there's a letter here for you.”

“For me? I've been waiting for a letter from
Mam.
” Ruth dried her hands on her apron then reached to take it from him. When she glanced at the address her smile faded and she tucked it into her waistband.

“Is it from your
mam?
” Waneta asked as she set a plate of bread on the table.

“
Ne.
I'll read it later. It's time for dinner now.”

Levi tried to keep his mind on his prayer, but the look on Ruth's face as she tucked that letter away wouldn't leave his mind. Instead of thanking God for his food, he found himself praying for Ruth. Whatever was in the letter, she wasn't looking forward to reading it.

“Moolah is nearly ready to calve,
Dat,
” said Elias when the prayer ended. “She's been pretty restless all morning.”

“You put her in the calving stall?”

“Not yet, but I will after dinner.”

“I want to watch when she has her baby,” Sam said, his mouth full of bread. “Can I,
Dat?
”

“It won't be this afternoon, son. You can watch when it happens, unless it's in the middle of the night.”

Ruth put a spoonful of green beans on Sam's plate and took some for herself. “Will she be all right?”

“Moolah?
Ach, ja.
She's had several calves already, and never has trouble with the birth.” Levi took a piece of bread from the plate as it was passed and reached for the rhubarb preserves. “Did you want to watch, too?”

Ruth reddened as he waited for her answer. She hadn't been to the barn since her first day when she had confronted him about the children. The weather had kept all the girls inside the last couple of weeks.

“I helped my
dat
with the calving at home, and I thought I could help with Moolah if you needed me.”

Levi thought of the long hours spent in the barn waiting for a calf to come. Salome would never come to the barn to watch a calving, and that had been fine. Women belonged in the house with the children, not sitting with him in the barn during the long hours of the night. He shifted in his chair as he had a sudden vision of sitting alone with this woman, talking together the way he and his sisters used to when they lived at home. What a good companion she would make.... But
ne,
she was his housekeeper, nothing more.

“I don't think I'll need the help.” He didn't look at her at he spoke, but he could tell his words had hurt her.

She turned from him to Sam. “What did you do to help your
daed
this morning?”

As Sam launched into a long tale of the chores he had helped with, Levi remembered it had been Ruth's idea for Sam to start learning to chore in the first place.
Ach,
and she had been right. He took another bite of casserole as he turned this thought over in his mind. She had an instinct for what the children needed. Even with the older boys. She treated them as men, not just boys who needed the same care their little brothers did.

Levi let his gaze rest on her as she listened to Sam talk. She nodded as he explained how to feed the cows, her face interested, although this must be old news to her. She smiled often, he realized. Some might say her mouth was too wide, but he thought it added to her beauty.

This was ridiculous. He didn't need to be staring at his housekeeper and thinking about her looks. He turned to his meal, concentrating on each bite. If he let Ruth take a place in his thoughts, then who knows where they would lead? John Stoltzfus hadn't said it outright, but it was plain that a young woman living here could appear wrong. There was nothing to worry about—they were conducting themselves properly—but if he let his thoughts stray, the wrong actions could follow right on their heels.

* * *

Ruthy didn't have a chance to look at her letter until after the dinner dishes were washed and Waneta went out to check the drying laundry. She sat in the small wooden rocking chair in the kitchen, left there from the days when Levi's wife had been ill and needed to sit often during the day.

She put her feet up on the footstool and pulled the envelope from her waistband. She had recognized the handwriting immediately. How many letters had she and Laurette exchanged over the years?

The familiar rounded script brought tears to Ruthy's eyes. She missed her
mam
and
daed,
but Laurette had been her dearest friend. She hadn't spoken or written to Laurette since that day in September when Elam told her they were getting married. Her beau and her best friend.

What did Laurette have to say now? What could she say? She and Elam were wed and expecting their first child. The man who should have been Ruthy's husband, the child that should have been hers.

Ruthy pulled a hairpin from her
kapp
and inserted it in the envelope flap, but hesitated. What did Laurette have to say that she couldn't have said last fall? Or worse yet, what if the letter were only full of news of Laurette and Elam's life together, sharing every detail of her life just as all her letters had through the years?

Ruthy smoothed the envelope on her lap. Ever since Laurette's
mam
had died when they were both eight, Laurette had been more of a sister to her than a friend. Living just down the road, it was easy for her to drop by their house whenever she grew tired of her
daed's
company.

Laurette had known how much Ruthy loved Elam, but had still accepted his invitation to ride with him the night Ruthy had missed the Singing because of a cold.

After that, Laurette had told her about her new beau, her first ever, but had never told Ruthy the boy's name. Meanwhile, days went by with Elam making excuses not to see her—and all the time he and Laurette...