Mother For His Children, A (13 page)

Ruthy's heart wrenched as Elias looked from face to face around the table. So much a man, and yet a boy. Why did he resent her so much?

“Elias, you may not speak in such a way about Ruth.”

Elias stood again, his face twisted in an effort to make his point. “She doesn't belong here,
Dat.
Mam
is your wife, not her.”

With that, Elias pushed past Levi to the door, banging it behind him as he went out into the night. Nathan stood to follow, but Levi stopped him with a motion.

“Let him be, son. Give him some time, and then I'll talk to him.”

Nathan sank back onto the bench, but turned to watch Elias's flight to the barn through the window. The other children sat in silence.

Levi looked at Ruthy down the length of the table, his eyes reflecting the helplessness she felt. What if Elias never accepted her?

“We'll let Elias sort out his feelings. I'm sure he'll calm down.”

“
Ja,
you're right.” But Ruthy knew how strongly a sixteen-year-old could hold on to his resentment. Elias may never forgive her for intruding in their family.

Levi put a smile on his face and reached over to pat Waneta's shoulder. “How about the rest of you? What do you think about Ruth living here with us always?”

“I think it's
wonderful-gut.
” Waneta took her
daed's
hand and gave Ruthy a smile that eased the sting of Elias's rejection.

“Me, too,
Dat,
” said Martha, her eyes glowing. “It will be
wonderful-gut
to add to the family. It's been so long since a baby came to live with us.”

Ruthy felt her face grow hot and she took a drink to cover her reaction to Martha's words. Of course the children would expect a baby. How could she tell them not to?

“Martha, don't you think we've had enough babies in this family?” James's voice was filled with disgust as he regarded his sister across the table.

Ruthy smiled. Eleven-year-old boys wouldn't look forward to a new baby the way their sisters would.

“We don't need to worry about babies right now.” Levi stopped any arguments before they started. “The wedding won't be for several weeks. Bishop suggested we have the ceremony on the last Tuesday of the month, so we have plenty of time to adjust to the idea.”

Waneta turned to Ruthy. “Will your
mam
and
dat
be able to come?”

Ruthy smiled at the thought of seeing them again. “I hope so. I'll be writing to them tonight to tell them about it.”

Jesse stuck his fork into his cherry pie. “You can marry Ruthy,
Dat,
as long as she makes pie for us.”

Even Nathan laughed at this.

“Wedding or not, it's time to get dishes done and homework started.” Ruthy stood and started gathering the plates from her end of the table.

“Ruthy.” Sam grasped her sleeve and tugged her down to his level. “When can I call you
Mam?
”

Sam had whispered his question, but the others had heard him and waited for her answer. Ruthy looked at Levi, but his eyes were on the spoon he had stuck in his coffee cup. Waneta's eyes were wet, and she dabbed at them with her handkerchief.

Ruthy held the little boy close and looked in his face. “As soon as Bishop says we're married, then you can call me
Mam.
”

She was rewarded with a pair of arms thrown around her neck and a sticky kiss on her cheek. Her eyes stung as she held him tighter. She may never have a
boppli
of her own, but God had given her these children to love.
Ach,
what a blessing!

* * *

As Ruth settled the children at the cleared table to do their homework, Levi followed Elias out to the barn. He was a good boy, growing into a fine young man. Some fathers had trouble with rebellious young people, but Elias had never gone against anything Levi had said or wanted—until now.

Levi found his son in the box stall with Champ, the new driving horse. The three-year-old was spirited, but was making progress in his training. Elias had done much of the work with him under Levi's direction, and the horse responded well to the boy.

Not the boy—the man. Elias was young, but a man in most ways. He would soon be taking baptism classes and courting some young woman. Did he have his eye on a particular one yet? But before any of that happened, Levi had to get to the root of this outburst against Ruth.

Elias glanced at him as he leaned on the side of the stall, but kept on with his grooming.

“How is Champ doing with his kicking?”

“He still hates to have his feet handled.” Elias picked up the horse's front hoof, patted the bottom and then set it back on the floor of the stall. “But I do this a couple times a day, and he seems to be getting used to it.”

The horse turned his ears back when Elias moved to a rear foot, but didn't kick.

“Where did you learn that?”

Elias straightened and ran his hand along Champ's back. “I don't know. I just thought of it, I guess.”

“You have a way with horses, son. It's a gift.”

Elias moved to Champ's head and straightened the forelock as the horse nudged his pocket. “
Ja,
Champ, there's a carrot in there.” He pulled a chunk of carrot out of his coat pocket and gave it to the horse.

If only he could be as understanding with Ruth.

“Champ has come a long way since we first bought him last fall.” Levi moved into the stall on Champ's other side.

“
Ja,
he has.” Elias patted the horse's cheek. “He was a pistol at first, wasn't he,
Dat?
”

“A big surprise after Maddie.”

Elias turned to Levi. “Maddie just wore out. She was a good horse.”

“
Ja,
she was.”

“You can't expect Champ to take her place so easily.” Elias moved quickly to defend his horse. “He's young and green, but he's learning quickly. By spring he'll be as good a driving horse as Maddie, for sure.”

“But he'll never be another Maddie.”

Elias snorted. “I wouldn't expect him to. No two horses are alike.”

“No two wives are alike, either, Elias.”

Elias froze and Levi waited, letting his words sink in. Elias picked up the curry comb with a jerky movement and started in on his grooming. “She'll never be my
mam.
”

Levi sighed and kicked at the straw littering the floor. “
Ne,
son, she'll never be your
mam.
You don't need a
mam
so much anymore, almost grown as you are. But the little ones need her.”

Elias leaned his arms on the horse's back and stared at Levi. “What about you? Do you need another wife?”

Levi's memory filled with the feel of Ruth in his arms. Not just another wife. He needed her.

“I do, Elias. God didn't make man to live alone. He made us to be yoked with a companion, a wife.”

“You have me,
Dat,
and Waneta and the others. Why do you need her, too?”

Levi gestured to the other stalls surrounding them. “We have Badger and Drift, Pokey and the others. Why did we need to buy Champ?”

“That's different. Badger and Drift and the others are draft horses, and Pokey's just a children's pony. None of them could be a driving horse like Champ.”

“It isn't that much different. The horses all have their roles to fill. Waneta has been trying to fill your
mam's
role for too long, but we all need someone older, more suited for the task. God has sent us Ruth.”

Elias leaned his forehead against the horse's back. “I think I see what you mean.”

“Elias, have you forgotten Maddie, even though she's gone and we have Champ instead?”

“I'll never forget Maddie.”

“You'll never forget your
mam,
son, whether I marry Ruth or not, and neither will I.”

Elias raised his head, his eyes wet, but the face looking at Levi was a man's face. “I'm sorry,
Dat
. I'll tell Ruth I'm sorry, too. If you think she'll make a good wife for you, and a good
mam
for the little ones, that's good enough for me.”

“
Denki,
son.” Levi's voice came out rough and he cleared his throat. “Someday you'll understand better, I hope.”

“I think I already understand why you want a new wife.”

“You do?”

Elias grinned at him and went back to currying Champ. “Because I know how much I like Ruby Zigler.”

Levi grinned back. Elias only had the slightest idea of the joys marriage could bring.

* * *

Ruthy set the sponge for tomorrow's bread as the scholars worked at the table, the only sound coming from the turning of a page or the scratch of a pencil on paper.

She would have never thought a house could be this peaceful with so many children. Salome must have been a
wonderful-gut
wife and mother.

And Levi was a
wonderful-gut
father.

As she went through the evening routine of
redding
up the kitchen for morning, Ruthy felt a new sense of ownership. This was to be her stove, her mixing bowls, her wooden spoons.

Ne,
she would get new ones and keep these back to send on with the girls as they married and set up housekeeping. Each should have something of their
mam's
to take with them, just as she had the few kitchen things her
mam
saved for her.

Her busy hands slowed as she wiped the counter for the final time. Who would she pass those things on to when the time came? Without a true marriage to Levi, she would never have her own daughters.

She rinsed the rags a final time, and with her work done, she sat in the small rocking chair and picked up her knitting. Before long, Levi would return to the house, the scholars would be done with their studies and it would be time for evening prayers. She would need to continue to step carefully around Elias's feelings, but the other children were anxious to welcome her into the family. Other than that one cloud, she could look forward to years of joy in this home.

Ruthy concentrated on the pattern of stitches to turn the heel of the stocking.
Ne,
there was more than one cloud on the horizon. With only friendship between them, would Levi grow tired of her? Once the children grew up, would her companionship be enough to make their marriage last? Or would they end up as two strangers sharing a house?

The stocking's heel turned under her needles, smooth and perfect. That's how things turned out when you followed a pattern. Whoever wrote the pattern had a plan in mind, and if you followed the pattern, the end result was perfect, every time.

God's plan for marriage was perfect, wasn't it? Ruthy pushed away the fly buzzing in her thoughts. There were plenty of examples of marriages in the Bible where the two people didn't even know each other, and they had good marriages, didn't they?

She and Levi were friends, they liked each other, they knew they worked well together...wasn't that enough?

It had to be enough.

 

Chapter Thirteen

“I
t looks like we're going to have good weather the next few days.” Levi's words carried over the clatter of breakfast dishes being cleared and feet pounding on the stairs as the children hurried to finish getting ready for school.

“Ja?”
Ruthy stacked bowls and gathered spoons into an empty serving dish. He stood at the window next to the kitchen table, adjusting his suspenders as he peered at the lightening sky. She paused to watch him, taking just a little longer than necessary. His brown hair held tints of red in the morning light, and she had never noticed what a well-shaped nose he had....

He turned around so suddenly he almost caught her staring. “I think we need to visit Eliza today. It's a good day for the drive, and we can stop at the store in Middlebury to pick up the replacement parts for the cream separator and other things you've been needing.”

“I'll make sure the children are ready.” Ruthy started stacking plates. Levi was right, they would have to tell Eliza about the wedding sooner or later, and the sooner the better, before she heard the news from someone else.

“The children can stay here.” Levi stacked the plates on his side of the table and passed them across to her. “The scholars will be at school, and Waneta and Elias can look out for the farm and Sam. You tell Waneta and I'll hitch up Champ. We'll leave right after the school bus comes.”

Ruthy took the plates to the sink where Waneta was getting the dishpan ready. “I'll go braid the girls, and then I'll be down to help with the dishes as quick as I can. Your
dat
wants to visit Aunt Eliza today.” She laughed at the stricken look on Waneta's face. “Just the two of us—you, Elias and Sam can stay here.”

“Ach
,
es gut....”
Waneta went back to drawing water from the reservoir. “Not that I wouldn't be happy to visit Aunt Eliza...”

Ruthy gave her a quick hug. “
Ja,
I know. It might become an uncomfortable visit once your
dat
tells her about the wedding. You'll be all right on your own here? You don't need me to stay behind and let your
dat
go by himself?”

Waneta laughed. “You're not trying to get out of going, are you? We'll be fine here for a day.”

By the time the dishes were finished and Ruthy had put on her thick stockings and warmest flannel petticoat, Levi was waiting for her with the buggy. As she climbed in he made sure the warming pan was next to her feet and laid a clean horse blanket over her lap.

“It isn't as cold today as it's been, but it will take us a couple hours to drive to Eliza's.”

“This is fine.
Denki.
”

Levi drove down the long farm lane and turned north on the county road.

“We won't be able to court the way young folks do, but we should try to get to know one another better before the wedding.”

Ruthy glanced at him. He looked as nervous as a young man driving a girl home from his first Singing.

“You're right. This is a good time to learn to know each other better. You can start. Tell me about your family. Is Eliza your oldest sister?”

Levi talked about his six sisters and how he had been a surprise addition to the family when his mother was in her forties. “
Dat
had given up on ever having a boy, and then I came along. Eliza was already married, and
Dat
had considered giving the farm to Eugene, her husband, but he didn't want to.”

“Why not?”

“The folks over in Middlebury have always been a bit freer with their
Ordnung
than we are here in Eden Township. Eugene had some pretty liberal ideas about things like using tractors for farming instead of horses, but then changed his mind. He knew if he went too far afield,
Dat
would never give him the farm. But then he died young, leaving Eliza a widow. By that time, I had come along and the problem was solved.”

“How much older is Eliza than you?”

“She was twenty-five when I was born, and Eugene died just a couple years later. They never had children.”

“And she never remarried?”

Levi gave a short laugh. “
Ne,
not Eliza. She's always been a bit too independent.”

“And your other sisters?”

“They're all married and have families. Three of them live in the Shipshewana district, one moved to Iowa with her husband about twenty years ago, and you've met my youngest sister. She's Nellie Graber, Mose Graber's wife.”

“
Ja,
I remember meeting her.”

Levi had turned west while they talked, and now pulled Champ to a stop at the state highway while a truck lumbered by.

“I'm afraid Eliza gave you a pretty hard time the last time you saw her.”

Ruthy shook her head. “
Ne,
not too bad.”

“You stood up to her. She likes that.”

The truck passed and Levi hurried Champ across the road. Ruthy snuggled closer into her shawl, wishing Champ would go a little slower. Levi and Waneta were both right. She wasn't looking forward to seeing Eliza again, but when she married Levi, they would be sisters-in-law. They didn't have to be friends, but they needed to come to some kind of understanding.

“What do you think she'll say when you tell her about the wedding?”

Levi reached over and covered her mittened hands with his big leather glove. “I don't know. I hope she'll be happy for us, but she can be awfully stubborn at times.”

Ruthy turned her head so she could see his face past the sides of her black bonnet. “She does love you. She only wants what is best for you.”

Levi pulled his hand back to turn Champ north at the corner. “
Ja,
I know. But usually her idea of what's best is the only thing that matters to her.”

* * *

When Ruth fell silent, Levi glanced her way. She was watching the side of the road and chewing her lower lip. Suddenly she shivered. Did he really have to drag her all the way to Middlebury to put her through another visit with Eliza? It looked like she was dreading this errand as much as Waneta usually did. But if Eliza heard about the wedding from someone other than him, she'd never forgive him.

“Are you cold? I should have brought another blanket.”

“Just a little,” she said, her breath puffing out in a cloud.

“Move over a little closer to me.” Levi shifted the reins to his left hand so he could help adjust the horse blanket as she scooted close enough to touch him, but not quite.

“You need to sit closer if you want to get any warmer.”

She moved a little, just enough that the edge of her shawl brushed his sleeve.

After a few more miles, Levi turned west again and could see Eliza's house in front of them. He nodded toward it. “That's Eliza's place, there.”

“It looks like a cozy little house.”

“
Ja.
She sold most of her farm soon after her husband died, but kept the house and a few outbuildings. She was the school teacher until the state changed the laws a few years ago. Once they put stiffer requirements in place, she had to quit. She finished eighth grade, but now they require teachers to have more education.”

“She lives here all alone?”

Levi nodded. “I think she likes it that way, or else she would have married again.”

As they drove in the lane, Eliza came out of the chicken coop, juggling a basket of eggs and her cane in one hand while she latched the chicken house door.

Levi pulled up to the hitching rail at the end of the back walk and got down from the buggy, reaching up to give Ruth a hand. “I'll blanket Champ and then I'll be right in.”

Ruth gave him a shaky smile, but turned to greet Eliza as she picked her way across the snowy yard.

“
Hallo,
Eliza. How are you today?” She went forward to take the basket of eggs from Levi's sister.

“Well enough.” Eliza greeted Ruth with a nod, then turned suspicious eyes on Levi. “
Hallo,
Levi. What brings you here today?”

“It's such a nice day, and Ruth wanted to get out a little bit.” Levi hoped Ruth would forgive him for stretching the truth. “We thought we'd come over and visit with you for a little while before we go on into Middlebury.”

“Middlebury? Isn't that a bit out of your way?”

“A bit, but Varns and Hoover is the only store around that carries the parts for my cream separator.”

She held his eye, waiting for him to waver the way he did when he was a child. But he didn't need to let her bullying bother him anymore. Levi winked at her and she backed down, turning to Ruth.

“Well, come in and have some coffee, unless you want dinner...”

“
Ach, ne,
don't go to any trouble. A cup of coffee will be fine.” Ruth took Eliza's arm and walked toward the door of the house with her. “We won't be staying that long. We need to run our errands and return before the scholars get home from school.”

Levi slipped a blanket on Champ and fastened the straps. But by the time he had followed the women into the house, Eliza had already said something to put a troubled frown on Ruth's face.

“Ruth tells me the children are doing just fine.” Eliza set a cup of coffee on the table.

Levi sat in the chair and glanced at Ruth. She stared at her own cup. “
Ja,
for sure everyone is doing well.”

Eliza sat in the chair on the opposite side of the table with an exaggerated sigh and took a sip of her coffee.

Levi cleared his throat. “I have some news for you, Eliza.”

“Ruth has already told me you aren't here to make arrangements for Nancy and Nellie to come live with me.”

“
Ne,
we aren't.” Levi hesitated. Eliza was headstrong and blind to the facts. If she still held out hope of the girls coming to live with her, how would she react to his news? “Ruth and I are getting married, so there will be no need for you to take them in.”

Eliza turned her cup in its saucer. “I see.”

“We hoped you would be happy at the news.” He glanced at Ruth. She turned her own cup, staring at the brown liquid.

“Isn't this quite sudden? After all, you've only known each other for a couple months.”

Levi fought to control his temper. His sister had always been able to prick at his conscience when he felt guilty.
Ja,
he and Ruth had come to this decision quickly, but hadn't Eliza been the one to force it?

“It is only because—”

“It's because of the children,” Ruth interrupted. “It wasn't right for them to continue on with me as only a housekeeper when they need a mother so badly....”

Eliza stood, knocking her chair back. “And I'm just an old woman no one needs,
ja?
”

Levi held out his hand to calm her. “Now, Eliza, no one has said that.”

“No one needed to say that, Levi. I'm not wanted. You can marry this stranger if you want, but I'm not going to be around to pick up the pieces when your home falls apart.” She turned and limped into the front room.

“
Ach,
Levi Zook, what have I done?” Ruth's hand was over her mouth and her eyes were wet with tears.

Levi took her other hand in his. “It's nothing you've done. It's me, and Eliza's own blind stubbornness. She'll get over it.”

* * *

Ruthy stood, looking for her shawl and bonnet. They needed to leave. Eliza would never forgive her, they could never see her again. How could this happen, that in trying to keep Levi's family together, she would cause a rift between him and his sister?

“Ruth, sit down.” Levi tugged at the hand he still held. “We must stay and talk this through with Eliza. It won't take long for her to come to her senses.” He drained his coffee cup.

Taking her chair again, Ruthy glanced into the front room. Eliza was pacing between the two windows facing the road, never looking their way. If Levi said they needed to stay, they would, but she would much rather leave and forget she had ever met this irascible old woman.

When she turned back to Levi, he was smiling at her. He still hadn't released her hand.

“I have a feeling you've never met someone quite like my sister.”

“
Ne,
I haven't.”

“She blows up quickly, but she gets over it just as quickly. I learned long ago to be patient when dealing with her. She can be maddening, but eventually she'll realize she has hit a brick wall and won't get her own way this time.” Levi squeezed her hand. “You know, sometimes you remind me of her.”

“Me?” How could he say such a thing?

“
Ja.
You're both stubborn women who are bent on doing things your own way.”

Ruthy felt her face grow hot as she turned away from him. He was right.

He tugged at her hand until she looked at him again.

“I don't mind at all. I love my sister, as irritating as she is sometimes. I think that may be why I like you so much.”

The thump of Eliza's cane on the wooden floor signaled her return to the kitchen.

“Levi, you take yourself out to the barn or somewhere. I want to talk to Ruth alone.”

Levi gave Ruthy's hand another squeeze and then left. As he pulled the door closed behind him, the sound was like a shot in the still house.

“Eliza, I...”

Eliza raised her hand to stop Ruthy's words.

“Let me say something, and then you can talk.” Eliza sat heavily in her chair. “My brother is a very deliberate man, so the suddenness of this marriage took me by surprise. He isn't one to make a decision like this lightly.” Eliza held Ruthy's gaze with her own. “I know he's doing it only so I won't continue to ask for him to send Nancy and Nellie here. He wants to keep you living on the farm with him, and the only decent way to do it is to marry you. Am I right?”