Read Mother For His Children, A Online
Authors: Jan Drexler
Ruthy covered the envelope with her hand and set the chair rocking with one foot. Would she forgive Laurette if she asked?
How could she? Laurette had stolen Ruthy's only chance to be a wife and have a family. She would live as a
maidle
her entire life, like Aunt Ella,
Daed's
sister, moving from one family's house to another, only staying until she wasn't wanted or needed anymore, and then traveling on to the next house.
Just like she would stay at Levi Zook's house only as long as she was needed.
Leaning her head back against the edge of the chair, Ruthy closed her eyes, worn out by the morning's work. Life was easier at home, for sure, with only three people in the house, but as much as she missed her home, this house was so pleasant to work in. It would be a sad day when Levi married and didn't need her anymore.
Ruthy let her imagination see Levi Zook's new wife in the kitchen, sitting in her chair at table, talking with the children, laying her hand on Levi's shoulder as she placed his coffee cup on the table in front of him...imagining the feel of Levi's broad shoulders under his cotton shirts, his smile as he turned his warm brown eyes to catch hers, his soft
denki
meant for her ears alone...
Ruthy's eyes flew open. Where had that thought come from? What was she thinking of? The man practically ignored her, for heaven's sake. He never spoke directly to her unless she asked him a question, avoided looking in her direction whenever they were in the same room together and spent most of his time in the barn. In the evenings, if she joined the family in the front room, it was because one of the children insisted, not him. As far as she could tell, he didn't even like her, let alone have the kind of feelings that would cause him to look into her eyes.
Ruthy pushed the letter back into her waistband and rose from the chair, glancing out the window toward the barn as she did.
Ach,
why did her thoughts always stray to him? She was nothing more to him than...than a cow who provided the milk his family needed.
Pulling the mixing bowl from the cupboard, Ruthy scooped an egg-sized lump of lard and a cup of sugar into it. Making a batch of oatmeal cookies would get her mind off Laurette and the life she had left behind in Pennsylvania.
She paused before cracking an egg against the side of the bowl.
Ja,
and off that Levi Zook, too. She hit the egg against the rim of the bowl with one hand, cracking it open as her
mam
had taught her. Another egg followed the first, and then Ruthy started beating the lard and eggs together with a wooden spoon.
What would
Mam
think of Levi Zook? She would compare him to Elam, of course. Where Elam was a boy, Levi Zook was a bear. Where Elam's blue eyes grew soft and dreamy as he gazed at her, Levi's brown eyes were sharp, avoiding hers whenever he could. Where Elam teased girls until they cried, Levi gathered his little daughters onto his lap and tickled them with his beard. Where Elam had betrayed her...what would Levi have done?
Ruthy's spoon slowed in the bowl, the eggs, lard and sugar beaten into a creamy yellow mass.
A man like Levi Zook would never betray anyone.
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Chapter Ten
M
oolah's first bellow stopped Levi's feet on the stairs. After a day full of unending work, he was ready to fall into his bed, but the day wasn't over yet. He had just tucked the little boys into their bed and given each of his girls a kiss. It was time for his last check on the barn, but Moolah's second mournful cry warned him this could be a long night.
The cow had been safe in the calving pen and seemed calm as he and the boys did the evening chores. Her labor hadn't started yet, but that had been almost four hours ago.
“Dat,”
said Elias from the top of the stairs, “do you want me to go out to check on Moolah?”
“
Ne,
son, you go on to bed. I'll go see if she needs anything.”
Levi heard another bellow as he went through the kitchen to the back door. She sounded alarmed at something. He shoved his arms into his coat and grabbed his hat. The path to the barn led through snow at least two feet deep, but it was well-packed. The stars shining on the white world gave him all the light he needed as he hurried through the frigid night to the warm cowshed.
Lighting the lantern kept on a nail by the door, he walked past the sleepy cows to the calving stall. Moolah was standing in the far corner with her head down and back hunched. He turned the lantern toward her head and she stared at him with white-ringed eyes.
“Moolah, good girl,” he murmured to her, opening the gate to the stall and walking toward her. She shied from his approach, moving to the next corner with a halting step. “
Ach,
Moolah, what trouble have you gotten yourself into?”
She let him approach and he ran his hand along her side, feeling the muscles of her abdomen tighten as a contraction gripped the Holstein. Moolah humped her back and kicked, bellowing again in her pain. Something was wrong. Very wrong.
He ran his hands over her distended stomach, trying to feel the calf through the unyielding wall of flesh. Every other time Moolah had calved, the little one had been born easily and quickly and Moolah hadn't seemed to notice the discomfort.
She moved to the other corner of the pen again, her steps halting. She nearly lay down on the straw bed, but then struggled back to her feet.
Levi knew what had to be done. He had seen his father reach inside the cow's birth canal to assess the problem in a difficult calving, but he had never done it himself. His hands, so strong when handling his team of six Percherons, were too large to attempt what Moolah needed without causing more pain than what she was going through now.
Scratching at his beard, he watched as Moolah suffered through another futile contraction. He had to rely on Elias, he had no choice. The boy's hands were small enough, but could he talk his son through the job when neither of them really knew what they were doing? He had to take the risk. Without this calf, without Moolah, his family would suffer.
“She's having trouble,
ne?
”
The woman's voice startled Levi. Ruth opened the gate and slid into the stall beside him.
“
Ja,
she's in trouble.”
Ruth looked at him, her blue eyes nearly black in the dim stall. “If the calf is turned wrong, they'll both die.”
“I know. I was just going to get Elias to help.”
“Has he ever done this before?”
“
Ne,
but I can't do it. I'm afraid I'd hurt her.”
Ruth looked at his beefy hand holding the lantern above his head. The light shone on her face, casting a golden light on her flushed cheeks. “I've helped my
daed
deliver calves many times. I can try.”
Moolah groaned as another contraction gripped her. The cow was weakening. If he didn't do something soon, he would lose both of them.
* * *
Levi's face was cast in shadow and unreadable. Would he let her help, or would he send her back into the house?
Another bellow from the laboring cow wrenched an exasperated nod from him. “All right. What do I need to do?”
Ruthy hung her shawl and sweater over the gate and pushed up her sleeves. Standing behind Moolah, she pulled the cow's tail to one side. As another contraction started, the small calf's nose appeared, only to retreat once the contraction subsided, sending a wave of dread through Ruthy. Was the poor thing still alive?
“It looks like the calf might have a turned leg. Maybe both.” She looked at Levi again. “We need to reach in and straighten the legs, and then the calf can slide out.”
Levi hung the lantern from a nail protruding from the beam above his head. His face was pale in the light. “I've seen it done, but...” He lifted his big hands, shrugging. “I'm not sure I can do it.”
“I can try, if you can hold her head still.”
Levi nodded and Ruthy eyed the cow again. Moolah was the biggest Holstein she had ever seen, much bigger than
Daed's
Guernseys. She found soap and water in the milking parlor while Levi lit and hung some more lanterns. The more she scrubbed her hands and arms, the more nervous she got. Why did she tell Levi Zook she could do this? If she were wrong, or if she weren't strong enough to help this poor cow, then the family would lose a valuable animal.
Moolah bellowed again and kicked the side of the calving pen.
“Is there anything else you need?” Levi Zook's strained voice told of his worry. Did he doubt her ability, too?
“I'll need a bucket of lard, and a length of stout chain, or rope, in case we have to pull the calf out.” Ruthy went through the procedure in her mind, remembering all the possible outcomes, as Levi disappeared through the door.
Moolah was still standing in the calving pen, but she didn't relax between contractions as a cow should. By the time Levi returned to the barn, Ruthy knew what course to take.
“First I need to find out exactly what's wrong.” Levi nodded, waiting for her instructions. “Hold her head still and talk to her. It will help if she can rest between contractions.”
Ruthy scooped up a handful of lard and greased her left arm up to the elbow and past it, waiting for the contraction to end. As Moolah's muscles loosened, she inserted her hand into the birth canal. She felt her way past the head and pushed past the neck to the calf's legs. Just as she thoughtâthey were both turned back along the calf's body instead of lined up along the nose as they should be. She pulled her aching arm out.
Daed
had always told her to check the cow with her left hand to save the strength in her right for the real work.
“I think everything will be fine, but we need to move quickly.” Ruthy started greasing her right arm with the lard. “I just need to bring the two front hooves forward, and it'll slide right out.”
Levi Zook nodded, his face green in the lamplight. What would she do if he fainted while she was working?
“I need you to hold her head. She won't like what I'm doing, and she may try to get away from me. You have to keep her still.”
Levi nodded again. “
Ja,
just be quick about it.”
Ruthy braced herself and forced her right hand past the calf. She found one hoof and, cupping it in her hand, brought it forward alongside the nose.
She found the second hoof just as another fruitless contraction started, gripping her arm in a vise. Ruthy closed her eyes and gritted her teeth, the only way she knew of to withstand the intense pressure.
“Are you all right?”
Opening her eyes, she saw Levi holding Moolah's halter with one hand and reaching toward her with the other.
“
Ja, ja, ja.
I'm fine.” She gasped as the calf struggled, nearly slipping the second foot out of her hand. “Just waiting for the contraction to end. Don't let go of her head.”
As the contraction subsided, Ruthy brought the second hoof forward and lined it up with the first. When the next contraction came, the calf's nose, cradled between the two soft hooves, followed her hand through the birth canal. Moolah gave a straining push and the little heifer dropped to the soft, straw-covered floor.
Ruthy backed up until she was leaning against the side of the pen, and Levi joined her, letting a tired Moolah tend to her new calf.
“That was
wonderful-gut,
Ruth. You did just the right thing.”
Ruthy nodded. Levi Zook's praise brought heat to her cheeks. Her arms were trembling from the exertion of manipulating the calf.
“I must wash up....” Ruthy reached for her sweater and cape, but both hands were covered in grease and slime.
Levi plucked one of the lanterns from the beam above them and led the way to the basin in the milking parlor. Warmth from the cow shed kept the water from freezing, but it was still cold. By the time Ruthy had washed her hands and arms again, her teeth were chattering. Her dress was filthy, but cleaning it would have to wait.
The entire time she scrubbed in the freezing water, Levi stood silently, holding the lantern. He watched her, she saw as she glanced at him once, like Moolah had watched her calf as it struggled to stand. What was he thinking?
“Are you going to stay with the new calf for a while?” Ruthy dried her hands on a piece of sacking she found near the basin while Levi threw the wash water outside.
“
Ja
. I want to make sure she's eating well.” Levi didn't look at her, but led her back to the warmth of the cowshed and the calving pen. “You could stay....” He bit off his words, as if he hadn't meant to say them.
“I really should get back to the house.” She put her arms into the sleeves of the sweater Levi Zook held for her. “Morning will come awfully early tomorrow.”
“It's already tomorrow.” Levi's voice was soft as he settled her shawl over her shoulders. “It's past midnight.”
Ruthy shivered one last time as Levi turned her to face him and drew the shawl closed in front. He stood, unmoving, for a long minute, his eyes dark. Ruthy thought he was leaning toward her. If he kissed her, what would she do? At that thought she turned toward Moolah and her calf, breaking the moment.
“She's a fine heifer calf, Levi Zook.” Ruthy struggled to keep her voice light, normal.
Levi leaned on the gate of the calving pen next to her, closing the gap she had tried to put between them. “God was good to us, tonight.” His voice was rough and he cleared his throat. “Without your help, we could have lost both the heifer and our best milker.”
“We make a good team when it comes to delivering calves, Levi Zook.” She smiled at him.
Levi laid his hand on her arm and leaned closer, his own smile warm. “
Ja,
we do. A good team.”
The calf stood once, and then fell into the straw. Ruthy watched Moolah give the calf an encouraging lick, then the calf stood again and started searching for the teat that would give her the sustenance she needed. A calf needed its mother from the very first minutes of life.
“God makes families, even for animals, doesn't He?”
Ruthy wasn't aware she had spoken aloud until Levi Zook grunted his agreement.
“He does. It's part of His care for us.”
Ruthy glanced at his profile in the lantern light, suddenly sorry she had mentioned it. With Levi Zook still grieving for his wife, her comment would be a sad reminder, but he only grasped her hand more firmly and pulled it so her arm rested entwined with his as they watched the calf until it finished eating and dropped into the soft straw bed, sound asleep.
Levi blew out the lanterns and they left the cows in the quiet barn.
* * *
In the dark kitchen, Ruth gave him a whispered “Good night” and slipped through the
Dawdi Haus
door. Levi padded across the kitchen toward his own room and bed, too aware of the short night ahead. Morning wasn't far off.
He dropped his trousers and shirt on the floor and crawled into his cold bed, shivering as he waited for warmth to gather under the quilts. When Salome was still alive, they would keep each other warm on nights like this, but
ach,
would she ever complain when he climbed into bed after being up late like he was tonight. He chuckled at the memory.
Ruth was right. God was so good to put people in families, but would he ever know the joy of a wife again?
As his mind drifted toward sleep, the night's events replayed in his mind. What would he have done without Ruth Mummert there? She was...like his right hand. The memory of her presence warmed him even now. He drifted to sleep with the feel of her arm entwining in his.
* * *
In spite of the short night, the morning's work had to be started on time. As Ruthy entered the kitchen, Levi was already kneeling in front of the stove, coaxing the fire to wakefulness.
“If you're running late, I can start the stove.”
“Ne, denki.”
He paused to blow on the embers and added a handful of tinder. “I'm almost done here. If I leave the fire for you to start, that will just delay my coffee.”
As Ruthy reached past him to take down the coffeepot, he stood, bumping into her. If he hadn't grabbed her arms to steady her, she would have fallen back, but instead found herself held close to his broad chest. She laid her hands against his shirt front to keep from falling against him.
“Are you all right?” he asked. His voice was low, with the same intimate tones he had used in the barn last night. Ruthy's stomach fluttered.
“
Ja,
I'm fine. We shouldn't try to stand in the same placeâthere isn't room enough for both of us.”
“I don't mind.”
Ruthy looked into his face.
Ne,
she hadn't been dreaming last night. Levi's eyes were warm as he held her close. She didn't move until she heard young men's feet on the stairway and she pulled back.
“Breakfast will be ready by the time you get back from choring.”
“You won't forget the coffee this time?”