More (25 page)

“Hush. You’ll love it.”

The group watched in silence as the wide-eyed Sabrina Fairchild developed feelings for David and Linus, two brothers. David was charming and exciting, while Linus was more serious and level-headed. As she grew and matured, Sabrina found a lasting love in Linus, although it was David she had loved for most of her life. When the movie was over, Kate found herself deep in thought. Rick and Amy left to relieve Amy’s parents from babysitting duty, and Darren and Brooke soon followed.

“Did you enjoy the movie, dear?” asked Meredith, picking up a few pieces of stray popcorn and throwing them into the empty bowl.

“It was beautiful. I loved it,” replied Kate.

“Then why do you look so sad?”

Kate offered a half-hearted smile. “Ben reminds me a lot of David from the movie. Spontaneous, passionate, a risk taker. And those can be good qualities in a person. But it was those things that made it impossible for David to settle down with Sabrina, even though he was absolutely obsessed with her once she came back from Paris. I think that’s what is happening with Ben. I think we met and it was all like a fairy tale, and now it’s time to snap out of it and really figure out how he feels. And I don’t know for sure, because I haven’t talked to Ben, but my intuition is telling me that he’s having a hard time making that decision. I think there’s a part of him that is afraid to give up his freedom. Everything just happened so quickly, and I’m afraid that all this time apart has given him a reason to find a way out.”

“I don’t pity you young people. Men were so much different back in my day. I’ve seen you go through so much – first with Ian, and now all these doubts about Ben. I just want you to find someone who will know immediately how amazing you are and be willing to grab on tight to you and never let you go.”

“That’s what I want, too. That’s what I’m looking for. I’m just starting to fear that it’s not out there.”

“It’s out there, dear,” said Meredith. “And you’ll find it. I have faith in that.”

~~~~~

The week went on and still, no word from Ben. Kate tried several text messages and phone calls, but nothing seemed to work. With every day that passed, she began to imagine more and more things that could be wrong. He didn’t want to do the long distance thing anymore. He had decided she wasn’t pretty enough. He had made his decision and he didn’t love her. Possible explanations raced through her mind day and night.

When it had been nine days since Kate had talked to Ben, she had no doubt that something was wrong. What had happened to the Ben that talked to her every day? Even if he was busy, was he really too busy to find the time to send her a quick text message or make a phone call? Upset and unwilling to let it go, she decided to write Ben an email.

Ben,

I’m sorry that it had to end like this. I feel like I’ve done everything in my power to be honest and good to you, but for some reason you’re choosing to not speak to me. I cannot even begin to fathom what led you to this decision. I don’t know if I did something to upset you, or if you decided that you’d rather avoid me than have a difficult conversation with me – whatever it is, just know that you’ve underestimated me. I am a loyal and faithful friend, even through difficult times and uncomfortable conversations. But Ben, I can only be that person if you’re willing to be honest with me and treat me with respect. I’m sorry, but I simply can’t go from the few weeks that we had to being completely ignored with no explanation whatsoever. I think I deserve more than that from you.

Remember how I told you that I thought you were a truly good person? I’m typically not wrong about people. I know you’re a good person. But I think you need to know that you’ve hurt me deeply.

I hope that God richly blesses your life and that you are happy and fulfilled. I mean that in all sincerity.

Kate

When she finished the email she slammed her laptop cover closed and headed off to work in a huff. She knew her email may have been slightly irrational, but she didn’t know what else to do. It was like he had fallen off the face of the planet. When she got to work she told Meredith what she had done.

“You know, hon, I think that was very brave of you. You deserve to be with a man who is so excited to be with you and can’t wait to talk to you. The very fact that he would let you go through that whole ordeal with your mom alone is inexcusable.”

“Well…I…I didn’t actually tell him about my mom. I didn’t want to tell him over voicemail.”

“Kate! I’m sure he would want to know what’s going on.”

“You’re right, I’m sure he would. But I wanted him to call me back because he wanted to, not because he felt obligated to.”

At that moment, Kate felt her phone buzz in her pocket. “It’s Ben!” she said as she looked at the screen. “I’m not answering it. I want to hear what he has to say before I talk to him.”

The next two minutes seemed to drag on forever. Finally, when the voicemail notification popped up on her phone, Kate held her phone to her ear and listened to what Ben had to say.
Kate, I just got your email, and I am so so so sorry. I’ve been really busy at work; I had a big assignment that was due and I have been working on it night and day, please don’t think that I have been intentionally ignoring you because I haven’t. I should have called you. I’m so sorry. Please call me as soon as you get this message. I’m going to try calling you back in an hour if I don’t hear from you, because I really want to talk to you and I don’t want you to be mad at me. I don’t know what else to say.

She listened to the message twice and was so engrossed in every word that she didn’t even notice Meredith pretending to straighten up behind the counter as she tried to read Kate’s expression. When she hung up the phone, Meredith leaned over the counter and impatiently said, “Well?”

“He…he said it wasn’t intentional. He said he’s been busy with work. I mean, he sounded sincere enough. But I just can’t understand how he could go this long without talking to me and think it’s okay. I don’t know…I’m still not convinced.”

“Sounds like you need to have an actual conversation with him. Be honest, Kate. That’s the best advice I can give you. Don’t apologize for what you are feeling, because your feelings are valid no matter what they are. Tell him how he’s making you feel and don’t be afraid to ask him the tough questions.”

Knowing Meredith’s advice was indeed wise, Kate nodded her head in agreement. She absent-mindedly worked through some invoices in her office for the next hour. She hoped he would keep his word of calling her back, and she definitely wasn’t going to make this easy on him by calling him. She was deep in thought when her phone buzzed loudly on her desk.

Kate let the phone ring as she took several deep breaths. After giving Ben a cool hello, he started into the same apologies that were left on her voicemail.

“I hear what you’re saying, Ben. You were busy. I understand that. But what I don’t understand is how we can go from weeks of talking almost every single day to literally no contact all of a sudden like that. Didn’t you wonder what I would be thinking?”

“I’m sorry! I’m just not very good at communicating.”

“Are you kidding me? Even if you are bad at communicating, which I don’t believe you are, how was I supposed to know that? You’ve been nothing but a
wonderful
communicator since we first met. Can’t you understand that?”

“You’re right, I should have called. I’m so sorry. I’ll do my best to be better about it in the future. Please forgive me. Please.”

“I don’t know. It’s going to take me awhile. I want to believe you and trust you, but you need to know that it hurt me very much to think that you would be able to just stop talking to me like that without any warning.”

“Kate. Listen to me,” said Ben softly. Even though she was angry and hurt, Ben just had a way of charming her. “You have every right to be upset. But you know me. You know I would never intentionally hurt you. I’ll earn your trust back. I will. I’m still planning on coming to town this weekend if you’ll let me. I think we really need to see each other.”

“Yes,” she said with a sigh. “I think you should still come. Maybe once we spend some time together I can get past this. I don’t want to fight with you, Ben, but I don’t want to get hurt, either.”

“I know. I won’t ever hurt you again. That’s a promise.”

Kate hung up the phone feeling hopeful but still troubled.
I hope this weekend will help us sort out this whole mess
, she thought.
I’m not willing to give up this easily. I still think he’s the one.

“Daddy! Daddy! Lookit me!”

This was a big weekend for Kate. After practicing for months, her dad finally thought it was time to take the training wheels off of her bike. As she flew past him on two wheels as they rode to the coast, like they did on so many weekends, Peter Henry thought to himself how lucky he was to have such an adventurous and fun-loving daughter. He had been completely devoted to his daughter since the day she was born and couldn’t believe that his baby was almost six.

“Wow, Katie, you’re doing such a great job! Keep going! Last one to the coast has to buy the ice cream!” It was amazing how her father had never beat her to the coast, not even once, when paying for ice cream was on the line. This race was no exception.

“Ha! I beat you again! You have to buy the ice cream, Daddy,” said a pig-tailed Kate, who was jumping up and down to celebrate her victory.

“Again? But I always buy the ice cream!”

“Daddy,” she said, looking very serious all of a sudden. “I don’t have a job. I can’t buy the ice cream.”

“You do have a job, sweetheart. Your job is to be an adorable little girl and grow up to be an wonderful woman.”

Kate smiled and sat down in the same spot where she and her father sat after every bike ride. Their destination was always the edge of a cliff overlooking the ocean. Peter sat down cross-legged next to his daughter, taking in the incredible view. She always looked forward to these times alone with her dad.

“How is school these days?”

“I like school. I like my teacher, and I like spelling, and I like recess with my friends.”

“Do you have a best friend at school?” Kate seemed to have a new best friend every week, usually a boy, so Peter had to try and stay up to date of his daughter, the social butterfly.

“Yes I do. His name is Patrick. We like to play on the swings.”

“Is Patrick a nice boy?”

“Yes. Well, he’s sad a lot. Sometimes he cries.”

“Why is he sad?”

“His mommy and daddy don’t love each other anymore. His daddy moved to a new house.” With those big green innocent eyes, she looked up at her father. “Daddy, I don’t want you to ever live anywhere else. Why did Patrick’s daddy move? I thought that mommys and daddys were supposed to love each other forever.”

Peter’s heart ached from the ugly truths about life that his daughter was learning. He wished he could shield her from the world and from the knowledge that life can be full of disappointment, but he knew he couldn’t do that forever. She was growing up. “Sweetheart, listen to me.” He pulled Kate into his lap and wrapped his arms around her. “You’re right. Mommys and daddys are supposed to love each other forever. I’m sure both of Patrick’s parents still love him very much, but sometimes grown-ups make bad choices and stop loving each other.”

Kate craned her neck back to look at her father. With big tears in her eyes threatening to roll down her cheeks and a quivering bottom lip, she said, “Are you and mommy going to stop loving each other?”

Peter squeezed his daughter tight. “No, Katie. No, we will never stop loving each other. That’s a promise. That is something you will never ever have to worry about.”

Kate wiggled around to face her father and threw her little arms around his neck. “I love you, Daddy.”