Missing Without A Trace (26 page)

Then, while you are waiting for them to arrive, visualize yourself in the place that made you feel the safest in your whole life. Perhaps it was snuggled under the covers in your childhood bed with your stuffed animals around you, or lying under a tree in a secret spot in your backyard looking up at the soft, floating clouds. Invite comforting people or pets into your reverie, as well.

Don’t wait for your life to pass before you. Concentrate on all the wonderful experiences you have had and recreate them as though you are watching a movie. Remind yourself of all your accomplishments, your travels, your mischief, lovemaking and laughter.

Connect yourself to your loved ones. Tell yourself that you have to hold on for them because of how much they would yearn for you and you for them if you were gone for good. Remind yourself how important you are to the world. You are here for a reason. Have you finished giving all of your gifts to the world? Surely, you have more to give.

Pray. Tragic circumstances can move even the most confirmed atheists to prayer. Connect with your God or Higher Power. Watch for your “eagle” or other sign that the universe has sent to keep you company and reassure you that all will be well.

Hopefully, you will never need to use this advice. But, meanwhile,
it behooves each of us to work towards bringing the policies of our local 911 department, Sheriff’s department and police department into the twenty-first century. With ever-advancing technology, there are now ways to locate the “missing” much more quickly, while protecting them from people they may have wanted to escape.

Tanya’s long road to recovery still stretches out in front of her. Our sessions of guided imagery were only her first step. She needs years—if not a lifetime—of medical treatment and psychotherapy. But, each time her story touches a reader’s heart, she will feel a gentle nudge towards her destiny of being healed and whole.

¹
Lewis Kamb, “Without a Trace,”
Seattle Post-Intelligencer
, February 17, 2003.

²
“Remembering Someone Who is Missing,” Let’s Bring Them Home The National Center for Missing Adults,
http://www.theyaremissed
. org/ncma/content.php?webid=remembering, accessed on December 20, 2010.

¹
Friedrich Nietzsche,
Twilight of the Idols
, 1888, “Maxims and Arrows.”

²
Eleanor Roosevelt,
You Learn By Living
, 1960, pp. 29-30.

³
Khalil Gibran, The Prophet, “On Pain,” 1923.

⁴
Oprah Winfrey, Commencement Address, Wellesley College, May 30, 1997.

⁵
Winston Churchill, “Night Bombing of London: ‘Every Man to His Post’” in
Complete Speeches
, vol. 6, 6277.

⁶
Winston Churchill, unsourced.

⁷
Dr. Seuss,
I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew
, Collins, 1967.

⁸
Ralph Waldo Emerson, unsourced.

⁹
J.K. Rowling, “A Sluggish Memory,”
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
, 2006.

¹⁰
Bill Cosby, unsourced.

An eighteen-year veteran 911 dispatcher in Green Bay, Wisconsin, Tracy C. Ertl is the publisher of TitleTown Publishing LLC, a vibrant, national house specializing in survival and true crime stories. She is a nationally renowned instructor in active shooter incidents for APCO International, and she writes “Riding the Alligator: Dispatches from the Frontlines of Law Enforcement (and Life),” a dispatch related blog for
Psychology Today
.

Photo by Chuck Leininger
.

Carole Lieberman, M.D. is a Beverly Hills forensic psychiatrist and expert witness who testifies in high-profile trials. She is also a bestselling author and speaker. Her books include
Bad Boys: Why We Love Them, How to Live with Them, and When to Leave Them; Coping with Terrorism: Dreams Interrupted;
and most recently
Bad Girls: Why Men Love Them & How Good Girls Can Learn Their Secrets
.

You will recognize Dr. Carole, a three-time Emmy award-winner, from her countless appearances on TV, including: Oprah, Larry King, O’Reilly, The Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, Fox News, BBC and many others.

She also hosts “Dr. Carole’s Couch,” a popular radio talk show, and is quoted in magazines and newspapers around the world.

One of society’s most highly respected psychiatrists, Dr. Lieberman is well known for her insight into the social issues of our time, from dating to dealing with the threat of terrorism.

She is a Diplomate of the American Board of Psychiatry and Neurology, and a well-regarded member of the Clinical Faculty at U.C.L.A.’s Neuropsychiatric Institute.

Photo by Werner Amann
.

The actual MISSING poster (shown here on a local news station) displayed during the eight day Tanya Rider was trapped in her automobile.

The interior of Tanya’s vehicle, where she remained trapped for eight days,

Above (two photos) and upper right: washington State Police exemine the crash scene off Maple Valley Road.

Police and crew work to remove Tanya Rider’s Honda Element from the crash site.