Missing Hart (30 page)

I needed to be civil, if for no other reason than the fact that she had helped my sister through her darkest hour. No matter how hurt I was by her lies and manipulations where I was concerned I would always been in her debt for taking care of Leah and making sure that she had gone to the hospital. If it weren’t for Dominique my sister would likely have hidden what had happened to her, and that fucking monster that hurt her would still be on the streets hurting other women.

Forcing a half smile I tilted my head to acknowledge her. “Dominique.”

She looked stunned that I was being civil, and that made me feel like shit. I noted that she was nervous, wringing her hands and fidgeting while she watched me. I was starting to wonder if she was going to say anything at all when she took a step closer to me, bringing us practically chest to chest.

Fuck it all, it hurt to be that close. I could smell the light fragrance that was unique to her, saw the rise and fall of her chest, heard the sound of her delicate breathing. Apparently, she was trying to torture me.

Looking up into my eyes she half-whispered, “Before you go in there I want you to know that we just found out that Mike Hart wasn’t my father.”

It felt like I was on candid camera. What the hell was she telling me that for? I stared at her for a minute while I waited for her to say something else but no words were forthcoming. Time stood still as we looked into each other’s eyes, and the wishful part of my brain imagined that she looked as if she still cared just as much as she once had.

The seconds ticked by in silence before I finally replied, “Okayyyyy.”

I drew it out so that she would pick up on my confusion and tell me why that was important, but instead she took a step back.

Shaking her head as if to clear it she touched my arm with her hand and said, “They’re good people. Don’t let your opinion of me taint the way you see them.”

Something tickled at my mind as her hand came up but it wasn’t anything I could focus on. After saying that to me she turned and all but ran away, but I stayed stock still for another moment, feeling the aftereffects of the shocking warmth from her hand on my arm. Of course I had known before that simple touch that her affect on me hadn’t lessened at all, but I hadn’t expected for it to be more potent than ever. Two emotions battled for dominance in my brain-joy at seeing her and blind rage at her for letting me fall in love with her. It was never going to get any easier.

Annoyed with myself for being such an idiot I forced myself to buck up before heading into her brother’s office suite. I was surprised to find three women sitting there staring at me, one of them being her identical twin. All three of them were so pretty that I wondered if Hart International had some kind of backdoor “Only Models Need Apply” policy that I’d never heard about. They all seemed nervous and they looked at me oddly, almost like they were cataloging my face.

One of them stepped forward and said, “You’re Dillon.”

I nodded and gave my most affable smile. “I am.”

“Let me tell my husband that you’ve arrived.”

Ah. Of course one of those lucky bastards had snapped her up. Judging by the fact that it was Dante Hart’s office I had to assume that she was his wife.

A few moments later she sent me back to the office, and I sensed an odd tension as I entered. There were three men in the room, but one of them was closer to me than the rest so my eyes settled on him first. I had the most extraordinary feeling of déjà vu when I saw him that it threw me off completely. I knew that I hadn’t seen him before but his eyes looked so familiar that I would swear that I had known him forever.

He introduced himself as Dante Hart before turning to introduce the other two men in the room as his brother Damien Hart and their honorary brother Spencer Cross. Briefly I wondered if Spencer had wound up with Delilah the way that Minnie had always thought that he would, but then I forced myself to push memories of Dominique aside.

The energy in the room was really strange. All three of them were seriously keyed up, and I had the distinct impression that everyone knew something that I didn’t.

After we were seated on the couch, Dante jumped right in and shared with me why the meeting location had been changed and why I was meeting with all three of them instead of just Spencer.

Of all the things, the scenarios that I had in my mind about what it might be like to find out who my birth family was, this wasn’t it. I was knocked for six but now I understood why Dominique had stopped to tell me that she had found out that her father wasn’t Mike Hart. I probably would have hit the floor when Dante made his little announcement because I would have thought that Dominique was my sister. I could only thank God that wasn’t the case. Life without her was hell enough that I knew that I couldn’t handle any additional drama.

By the time I left the office my mind was absolutely blown. Those three strangers were my brothers, were Leah’s brothers as well, and I needed to decide how to proceed. Like everything else in my life, it tied back to Dominique. If I allowed a relationship with the Hart family to happen, I would have no choice but to see her often. The idea of seeing her was pathetically exciting, but the knowledge that I’d be seeing her and her girlfriend was nauseating. I knew my limits, and I fully realized that I couldn’t watch someone else touching her without going crazy with jealousy. I knew that my relationship, or lack thereof, with her shouldn’t factor into my decision to go forward with the family…. But the truth was that it was going to be one of the biggest considerations for me.

When I stepped back into the hallway she was leaning against the outer wall waiting for me. She searched my face, looking to see if I was okay I think, and once she saw whatever she was looking for she spoke.

“You doing okay?”

I raised my hands in the universal gesture for ‘I have no fucking idea.’

After about thirty seconds I said, “I need to think about Leah.”

She nodded her agreement to that. “I knew that you would say that, and that’s why I told you that they’re good men. You and Leah already mean something to them, and they want to bring you into the family. You can trust them.”

Could I? Only she really knew. Finding out that my biological father was the evil piece of shit that had molested the love of my life was freaking me out. Dante, Damien and Spencer had all made it a point to tell me that they had no love for any of their parents, but still… how could I be sure of that without asking Minnie? I couldn’t expose my sister to anyone with less than pure motives. She pretended to be strong, but she was still fragile from what had been done to her.

My response came out before I could think it through. “I need to talk to you. Can you come over right now?”

I was kicking my own ass for asking her to come over and it didn’t escape my notice that she looked completely stunned.

“Um… yeah… I mean of course, if that’s what you want. I can be there after I check in with my family. It will probably take about an hour to get out of here, if that’s okay. Let me put your address into my phone.”

Looking at her I shrugged like what I was about to tell her was no big deal.

“I still live in the same house.”

She looked stunned, but I pretended not to notice because I didn’t want to draw any attention to the fact that I hadn’t moved. I knew it must have seemed nuts that I hadn’t-it was a rental after all, and I made a ridiculous amount of money these days. I could have moved on and bought something much bigger by now, but I couldn’t emotionally part with the home that we had decorated together.

Where I had wanted to run from the memories of Marissa in my last house, I couldn’t let go of the memories of Minnie in this one. It hadn’t changed at all, was all but a shrine to her, right down to the pear candles that I still burned. What that said about me, I wasn’t sure. Having her back in that space was very likely going to be painful for me, but I needed to talk to her more than I needed to push her away.

She nodded at me before quietly saying, “I’ll be there.” With that she turned to leave, and I watched her every step of the way before she entered the door to her brothers office and I couldn’t see her anymore.

I was completely out of it by the time I got back to Dante’s office. I told them that I’d introduced myself to Dillon in the hall, but Dante noticed that something was wrong and called me on it. I managed to shut him down, but Damien gave me a look that said he was putting things together and he had a lot more questions. Since I had already made the decision to tell him, for once his interest didn’t make me anxious. Either that or I was so keyed up about going to Dillon’s house that nothing else could rile me up.

I was a nervous wreck the entire drive to the house that I’d once dreamed would become my home. I’d given him every part of my body, heart and soul in that house. The last moment that I had been a whole person had been in that house. Our baby had been created in that house. That more than anything made it hard for me to go back, but my knee-jerk response was always going to be to be there for Dillon, and that made my fears superfluous.

Pulling into the driveway I marveled out how little had changed. I was parked in the spot that I used to consider mine, and I could remember every second of the last time I had been here.

His truck was brand new and top of the line, but other than that everything was the same outside. I wondered if that would be the case inside, but I assumed not. Taking a deep breath for courage I headed to his front door.

He opened it before I could knock, and after stepping back he gestured for me to come in. I had been mistaken in my assumption that the interior would have changed. Walking into the house was like going back in time. Everything looked exactly the same. The knick knacks we had picked out, the scent of the pear candles I had turned him onto, the colors on the wall, the rug we had bought at the Rose Bowl flea market-it was all there.

“Thanks for coming,” he said as he gestured to the couch. “I have a shitload of questions about your family that need to be answered before I tell Leah.”

I sat on one side and he sat on the other, and it hurt my heart to be that close to him. My body craved his touch and my hands ached to soothe the tension from his face. My beautiful man needed to be reassured that everything was going to be okay and I was anxious to ease his mind.

“Ask me anything. You’re important to them now and I want you to choose to let them in. I know that you and Leah both will grow to love them. Now that Dante knows that his nightmares were based on reality, he really needs to connect with you. I want that for my brother, and I want it for you too.”

Running his hands through his hair he leaned back and sighed. “I remember him too. I want to try, but I can’t just throw my sister into a situation that I’m not sure is good for her.”

“My family is amazing and they would never do anything to hurt either one of you. Leah would only benefit from gaining the three of them as brothers. If you believe nothing else I say, believe me when I tell you that I love her and I would never suggest doing anything that would hurt her.”

He was silent for a minute before saying, “I believe you, but you being involved brings a whole other set of problems. Judging by the fact that they didn’t draw and quarter me today I can only assume that your family doesn’t know about what happened between us.”

My heart immediately started beating faster as he navigated the conversation to an area I was afraid of.

“No,” I said. “There was no reason to tell them so I never did. As of today Damien definitely suspects something, but that’s all. I wouldn’t tell them anything that would make you look bad.”

It was like I had thrown a switch in his mind and I watched as he went tense all over.

“So I’m still your dirty little secret. Of course you wouldn’t want your brothers to know that I’m the scum sucking gardener pig that fucked their sister when she was in high school.”

He was never going to stop making me pay for that stupid fucking mistake, and something in my brain snapped like a twig as all the rage that I’d bottled up for four years boiled over. In less than a second I was on my feet and I had slapped him across the face.

“Fuck you! Fuck you, fuck you, FUCK YOU! You have no idea what you’re talking about you stupid son-of-a-bitch. You broke my fucking heart into a million pieces and ruined my life in the process, and yet still you have the balls to treat me like some kind of goddamn leper. I made a bad decision and I’m sorry! I apologized a million times and you never listened to a damn thing I said. At least I was in the relationship for real, unlike you. I made a mistake but you… YOU were the fucking liar. YOU were the one that made promises that you didn’t keep. YOU dropped me like I was contagious and moved on to sticking your dick in everything that had a hole and a heartbeat you asshole! I’ve paid for my mistake a thousand times over and I don’t fucking need you getting your kicks by rubbing my face in it one more time. I live in fucking hell because of you and you never even cared to see if I was all right. I wish I’d never laid eyes on you!”

Turning on my heel I ran for the door, desperate to be away from him. I swung it open at the same moment he reached a hand out and slammed it. Turning on my heel I glared up at him. “What the hell are you doing? You can’t let go of the past and I’m done being your fucking punching bag. What do you want?”

Pushing me roughly against the door he wrapped his fingers in my hair and pulled me against him.

“You! Goddammit, I fucking want you.”

We met each other halfway, mouths smashing against each other in a kiss so intense that it was painful. My body went up in flames, the blood in my veins flowing hot for him. Our hands collided as we started ripping at each other’s clothes. He bunched my skirt up to my waist and tore my panties off as I struggled to get his jeans open. Finally I succeeded, reaching in and pulling his massively swollen erection out of his jeans and positioning it right at my center, marveling out how wet I was as I drenched his swollen head with my arousal.