Maggie for Hire (3 page)

“I have to go see my mother, all right?”

Yah, that made the blood drain from his face.

“You may let me off at the mouth to the Woods,” he said.

Smart man.  I wished I could go with him.

I pulled over in front of the arched gate, its carved wooden flourishes marking the entrance to the elves’ domain.  I waved to the horse and cart behind me to go around.  The horse gave me a disgusted glare as he passed, his owner gave me a sympathetic nod.

“Okay, Killian.  Here you go.”

“I shall await your return.”

God, the guy just doesn’t get a hint.

“Listen, Killian, you’re really nice, but you’re walking that fine line between clingy and stalker-esque.  I promise I will make good on that favor owed, but you gotta give me a little space.”

“I am here to help.”

Without thinking, I accidentally looked deep into those baby blues of his and man, I was going to have to turn on the defroster to unfog the windows.  I couldn’t seem to get my mouth and my brain to synchronize.

I closed my eyes, “Turn off the glamour, punk.  I fight the bad guys, right?  I can’t be getting all mushy if there is ass kicking to do.”

“I apologize.  I forget my effect on human women.”

Right.  How convenient.

But the pheromone ocean subsided and my pulse slowed down to a normal enough rate to hear him when he said, “Maggie, after you speak with your mother, please do not go after this foe alone.”

That made me look at him a second time, “Wait.  What does this have to do with my mom?”

“My Queen has directed that I say no more.”

I suddenly felt like I was about to learn that I had walked into a great big game show of The Multiverse’s Next Top Stooge, “Riiiight.”

Killian exited my car and leaned against the doorframe for a moment to let me know, “I shall wait for you here.”

I put the car into gear and drove off wondering, as I stared at him in my rear view mirror, what he wasn’t telling me.

Chapter 8

The neon palmist sign hummed in the red curtained window, foxglove and wolfsbane growing in the postage stamp sized yard.  I opened up the picket gate and walked down the cobblestones to the front door.

“Hey, Maggie!  Long time, no see!”

I waved at my mom’s neighbor, Jack.  He owned the business next door.  He was a fix-it man, a jack-of-all-trades.  Get it?  Ba-d-um-dum-ching.  Oh, the Other Siders and their highbrow humor.

This was an older part of town, filled with curiosity shops and bakeries.  Mom owned a psychic eye tearoom/den and ran it out of the front of her house.  Psychic shops were about as glamorous in the Other Side as Radio Shacks are on Earth, but Mom had a dedicated clientele and had proven time and again that she had the gift.

Which is why I didn’t visit very much.

“MAGGIE!!!  Who is the tall blonde man?”

Christ.  Already...

Mom stepped through the beaded curtain separating the living room from the kitchen.  She wore a purple muumuu, her curly red hair fro’ed out in a triangle around her head.

“Hey Mom...”

She gathered me up in her arms and gave me a sound kiss on the cheek, “You need to visit more often.  I know you won’t be back for a couple weeks, but still, you should stop by.”

“I’ll try.  Things have been very busy lately...”

“Sit down!  Sit down!  I have your favorite tea brewing!”

I sat on the poufy couch, sinking in between the tasseled pillows and feeling like I was twelve years old again.

“You’re lucky that vampire didn’t get you last night!” she called from the other room.

“I was wearing protection!”

She hustled back in with two steaming cups on saucers, “Well, you woke me in the middle of the night.  I thought I was going to have a heart attack.  A mother shouldn’t have to feel that much fear coming from her daughter.  Can’t you find a nice daytime job? Perhaps something in cosmetics?”

This was not going well.  I went to sip the tea, but she stopped me, “Don’t scald your tongue.”

I stopped and blew upon the surface dutifully.

“Now, tell me about this tall blonde man in your life.”  She practically bounced as she asked.

“He’s an elf...”

“Ooo.  Do tell!  I’ve always loved the elves.”

“I know, Mom,” I said, trying hard not to die.

“So, he is an elf...”

“Yes, he’s an elf named Killian...”

“And he mysteriously came into your life...”

I set down my teacup, “Do you want me to tell you or do you want to save me some time?”

She gave me a wink and pushed my teacup towards my mouth like a toddler who can’t figure out his sippy cup, “Drink up, dear, drink up!”

“Mom, he said that there is a break in the border between the Other Side and Earth.  He said I’m the only one who can stop this.  He said you’d know why.”

Well, that shut her up.

I’ve never seen my mom scared.

I mean, she pulled the injured bird act whenever she needed to manipulate a situation in her favor, but my mom is a force of nature.  So, I was a little thrown when her teacup started rattling in her hand.  She sank into her chair and put her drink on the table beside her, “I did not see this coming.”

That was a first.

“See what, Mom?”

She jumped up and began pacing the room, wringing her hands, “I thought we had left this all behind us.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Of course you wouldn’t know...”

“Mom?”

“I should have told you sooner...”

“MOM?”

“How was I to know that he would find us here...”

“MOTHER WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?”

“Your uncle, dear.”

The words knocked me flat on my ass.  I had no uncle.

“What?’

Mom came over and patted me on the knee, “Your uncle.  We thought this chapter of our life was over, so that’s why your father and I never spoke with you about it.”

“We have an uncle?” 

It was a foreign word on my tongue.  Uncle.  Family.  Beyond my parents and my sister.  I had an extended family.  I mean, sure it was too late for him to take me to the zoo and buy me a camel ride, but still.  I had an uncle.

“He wasn’t a very nice man,” she said.

Strike that, I had an evil uncle.

“Whose brother?” I asked.

“Your father’s, dear.”

And then Mom let out a deep sigh and her face became very serious.  She tucked a loose strand of my dark hair behind my ear, “Did you ever wonder why we moved to the Other Side?”

I had.  I had wondered every day since I was ten years old and had come home to find all of our belongings in a moving truck.  I had wondered as we had made that drive up Mulholland and driven off the cliff.  I had wondered as we dropped into the Other Side with its steam powered machines and nightmarish creatures.  I had wondered every day as I tucked garlic cloves in my pockets and strapped a crossbow across my back.  The Other Side is no place for a human child to grow up.

“You said it was because I was beginning to show that we were not like other families.”

“That was a half truth, Maggie.  I’m afraid it was more because your uncle was beginning to realize that we were not like other families.”

“I don’t understand.”

“When I met your father, I was reading cards on a folding table down in Santa Monica.  He saw me and I saw him and we knew that we were meant for one another.  But he was an Other Sider and I was a human – a gifted human, but a human, nonetheless.  Your father’s brother felt like this was... inappropriate... for your dad to mix with someone like me.  Your uncle, his name is Ulrich...”

“Wait, I have an Uncle Ulrich?”

“It does have a rather nice ring, doesn’t it?”

“No, I was about to say...” I don’t know.  Creepy.  Unnerving.  The perfect name for a criminal overlord?  “Never mind...”

“Well, dear, he decided to take it upon himself to discourage our marriage.  We hid there on Earth for as long as we could, but when your gifts started coming to light, we couldn’t hide amongst normal mortals any longer.  The good news was that your uncle didn’t have the powers your father did to travel back and forth over the border.  Ulrich made it to Earth, but he couldn’t make it back to the Other Side.  So we came here and we made sure he stayed there.”

The lights sorta started coming on in my head.

My official condition was classified as “World Walker” in the Other Side Journal of Medical Magic.  It is a pretty elite club.  My dad was amazing.  He could go back and forth between dimensions like most folks walk between rooms.  I’m good but no one, living or dead or undead, has ever held a candle to my dad’s skills.  

Over the years, the world walkers have created the permanent portals that made it possible for day-trippers to go take a look around Earth and get back.  The official portals are carefully monitored and tracked.  But there is a booming business of folks who try to predict where the veil is going to be randomly thin and queue up those who might welcome an under-the-radar opportunity to pop on through.

The problem with those naturally occurring portals is that while you can get over to Earth fairly easily, returning to the Other Side is a bitch.  You have to reopen the portal, but there is very little magic on Earth.  You have to be pretty frickin’ powerful to bend the physical laws enough to let you through.

That, too, was why my dad was so special.  And why his disappearance had come as such a shock.  He was helping me with a run.  I came home okay.  He didn’t.  I went back and looked for him.  His signature said he stepped through the door, he just never reemerged.  It happens.  When someone is too weak, the portal will collapse, killing them instantly, or at least we all hope that they are killed instantly.  I just didn’t think that day would be the last time I’d hear him laugh or call me Maggie-girl.

“So, Uncle Ulrich is trying to come home...” I said.

“I would assume so.”

“By destroying the border and bringing down all of civilization with it?”

Mom sighed, “Like I said, he wasn’t a very nice man.  Not like your father.”

Now it was my turn to pace.  I picked up my now lukewarm tea and chugged it.  I flipped it upside-down on the cup, “Read them.”

Mom held up her hands, “Now dear, you know I can’t do that when you are so angry...”

“READ THEM.”

Mom took the saucer out of my hand and lifted the cup.  She stared at the leaves and sighed, “It’s him.

And he’s tearing down the boundary.  And you need to leave for Los Angeles tonight.  Well, that’s good to know I won’t see you for a couple weeks because you’re out of town, not that you hate me.”

“I don’t hate you, Mother.”

“A child will never fully understand a mother’s love.”

I could feel a headache coming on, “Just keep reading.”

“Well, that’s just about it.”

“No, is there anything about what I should do when I get there?  How I find him?  How I can cause him to stop?”

“No.  But it does say you should bring that gorgeous elf you’ve been traveling with.”

“Is that really true or do you just want me to have a guy around?”

“Dating never hurt anyone, dear...”

“Mom...” I warned.

“Honey, I’m not getting any younger and I would like to be able to enjoy my time with my grandchildren.”

“Mom.  I’m here asking you about keeping our two worlds from colliding and keeping the physical space of the universe intact and you’re concerned about my love life?”

“I just think you might be missing out on some of life’s greatest pleasures.”

“I’m fine.  Just... read.  Read the tea leaves.”

She put down the saucer, “They don’t say anything else.”

“Now, don’t pout.”

“I’m not pouting.”

“Mom, the information you have might be vital.  Tell me what to do?”

She got up and wandered back to the kitchen.  I could hear her washing the dish in the sink.  “You never listen to me anyways,” she called.

“I’m listening!”

She stood in the doorway, “They don’t say anything else that I can tell you.  Just go to Los Angeles.  Bring Killian.  And don’t die.”

“Two out of three?” I offered, thinking it would be so much easier to leave Killian in the forest.

“All of them, honey.”

“Will I be successful?”

“Would I be standing here fighting with you if I thought you were even capable of failing?”  She came over and wrapped me up in her arms, “Your father would be proud.”

Mom was soft.  I leaned up against her.  All I could think was that I still missed Dad so much it hurt.

She kissed me on my temple, “Me, too, dear.”

Chapter 9

I blasted the A/C the moment I started the car.  Double rising suns make for some gnarly car bake.  I cranked up my radio and tried to drown out the voices in my head with some old skool Guns ‘n Roses.  But “Sweet Child of Mine” just made me think about my dad, which made me think about my mom, which brought me back to the fact I had an evil uncle who was tearing down the boundary between two planes of existence and the entire fate of several worlds was somehow now my responsibility.

Crap.

My cell phone chirped and I picked it up.  No, Verizon doesn’t cover the Other Side with its 4G network.  We have our own version of contract mobile hell to deal with.

“Maggie speaking,” I barked into the receiver.

“Maggie, we have another skip.  Ghoul seems to have decided to go day tripping.  You in?” asked Lacy.

“I’ll swing by to pick up the paperwork now.”

Nothing got my spirits soaring like work and nothing sent them stratospherically like something to distract me from a bigger problem.

I pulled into the courthouse, a gothic nightmare of grey stones and cold iron.  Guess they wanted all the bureaucrats to feel at home.  The guards on the turrets lowered their crossbows as they saw who it was.  I gave them a little wave as I drove across the drawbridge.

I parked right next to the Bureau of Records and jumped out of my car.

The office was cramped.  Filing cabinets and a large desk took up most of the space.  What was left over was taken up by the ogre processing paperwork.