Maggie for Hire (10 page)

Killian relaxed, “Good.”

I started laughing, “Don’t you love it when it’s ‘just vampires’?”

Killian gave a rueful chuckle, “Yes.”

Suddenly I heard a voice calling loudly, “Maggie!  Maggie MacKay!  We bring a message for you.”

I took a second to think it through, but decided it was probably worth it for me to find out what they were doing here.  I jerked my head towards the backdoor.

Killian raised his crossbow, “After you, milady.”

I opened my door, but left my screen door closed.  Technically, the threshold of my home should have held at the porch steps, but flying projectiles don’t have the restrictions of thresholds and I wasn’t going to expose myself any more than I had to.

“What do you want, vampire?”

“Come out and talk?”

“Don’t insult me.”

“Or you could let us come in to you.”

“Or I could shut the door and spend the rest of the night reading a good book.  I’m standing here listening, which is more than your undead ass deserves.”

“We bring a message of peace.”

“Right.”

“We could go get some associates of ours that are not bound by the sanctity of your home.”

“Would you quit the pissing competition and tell me what it is you need to tell me?  I’ve got a bathtub that needs scrubbing.”

“You were looking for answers at the Wagon and Cock this evening...”

My ears pricked up, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“The man you spoke with is already dead for the information he shared.”

Crap.  I never meant to get anyone killed.  I didn’t want to get anyone killed by a vampire.  I rubbed my neckguard.  I knew what that fate felt like. 

“If I was talking to someone, and I’m not saying I was, what concern of it is yours?”

I heard the vampires hissing at each other there in the darkness before coming to silent agreement, “The night has ears...”

I was going to have to go out.  I owed the dead Lars that much.  I turned to Killian and he could evidently see the decision on my face.  One didn’t get very far in the tracking business if one wasn’t willing to take chances.  You also didn’t get very far if you were a blithering fool.  I went over to my coat closet and pulled out some Kevlar.

Killian straightened my vest in a very proprietary way and laid his hands on my neckguard, “If the vampires attempt an attack, I shall, as you would say, ‘drop them’ before they can get past this, my partner.”

I gave him a grim nod and then stepped out of the house.  Killian’s crossbow was trained on the leader.  I walked to the corner of the porch.

“What?” I asked.

The leader walked forward, “We are... grateful... for your willingness to meet with us.”

“I wouldn’t call this willingness.”

“We need you to create a portal for us.”

I laughed, “Oh, you vampires are rich...”

“Yes, we are.”

And that was when he dropped a sack of money that was filled with probably ten years worth of my salaries in one burlap wrapped sum.

I looked at him in disbelief, “You’ve got some talking to do.”

“We need you to build a portal.”

“Yah, that’s why god invented the legal channels.  It’ll save you a whole bunch of dough.”

“The ‘legal’ channels are being monitored by our master.  It is how we have known when you left the Other Side and when you returned.  We know things about your uncle.”

“What do you know about my uncle?” I asked sharply.

“He has promised a harvest of humans from Earth.”

My uncle was sounding like a better and better guy every time I learned something new about him.  I could see why my dad decided to strand him on Earth.

“Listen, if you’re bent out of shape because my uncle broke some promise about an all-you-can-eat human buffet and think I’m going to build you some interdimensional drive-thru window, you’re barking up the wrong crazy tree, Mr. Crazy.”

The vampire hissed in frustration, “You do not understand.  He is working with the new master.  We...” the vampire motioned to his associates, “do not subscribe to Vaclav’s views and wish to disrupt the flow.”

“And which views exactly is it that you don’t subscribe to?”

“The humans are not being captured to feed our clan.  They are being turned to grow our numbers.  Vaclav seeks to collapse the boundary between worlds.  To do so puts us all at risk.  It is not sustainable.  We have information that if delivered tonight could put an end to this plan.”

“So you magically show up on my doorstep, just a bunch of secret spy vampires, and want me to open up a portal so that you can head over to Earth and put an end to your master’s greedy ways?  I haven’t heard a story that lame since I quit babysitting teenagers.”

“You are our only hope.”

“Go home.  I don’t work with vampires.”

And with that, I turned and walked to the house.

“We will be dead by tomorrow,” said the leader vampire.

“And why should I care?”

“Our master believes your uncle is his partner and weakens the barrier for a common cause.  But your uncle is plotting his own war.  Both sides will destroy each other if the barrier comes down.  Pier 67 holds the answers.  You must go there tomorrow.”

“Why?” I asked, barely looking over my shoulder.

“A jade artifact will be brought in to help transport our kind between the two worlds.  It is in the shape of a Chinese lion.  You must protect it from your uncle and our master.”

I gave a shrug, “I’ll check it out.”

“Maggie MacKay, do not be a fool.  We come here knowing the risk, knowing to do so would seal our doom.  Listen to what we are saying to you.”

I spun, “No, you listen to me, vamp.  I’ve fallen for your people’s goodwill more than once.  This isn’t the first time I have been approached on a matter of direst consequence.  I listened to your lies once and it almost got me killed.  I will look into your ridiculous jade lion and if I find there is some merit to what you say, I will handle it.  But don’t you dare come marching into my backyard, telling me you need a portal and then try to play the guilt card on me.  I’m not playing.  I know your kind.”

I walked back into the house and slammed the door behind me, stopping to lean against the kitchen island and catch my breath.

Killian’s gentle hand was at my waist.  I probably should have shaken him off, but sometimes even someone like me just needs to know someone cares.

He pulled me close to him and I leaned against is broad chest.  He rested his cheek upon the top of my head.

“Why does it always have to be vampires?” I muttered into his shirt.

“There, there.  We bagged a ghoul.  It is not always vampires.”

Thank god for elves.

Chapter 22

I woke to the sun shining.  I could smell cinnamon and coffee coming from the kitchen and stumbled my way down the stairs.

Killian came over and planted a kiss on my forehead before handing me a mug of deep black coffee, “So, today we check out Pier 67?

“Yah.  That and I need to do some research on a jade lion.”

I opened up the cupboard to pull out some plates and then noticed that Killian had already set the table.  Someone’s mama raised him right.  It had been a long time since anyone had cooked me breakfast with no bikini strings attached.

I took a seat and helped myself to some sort of gooey coffee cake roll thing with icing and butter.  Man, he was a good cook.

“Do you believe that the vampires were telling the truth?” he asked.

I tried to focus on the question and not the fact his cooking was better than the majority of the intimate relationships I had been in.

I swallowed and washed down that little bit of heaven with some coffee, “Listen, vampires look out for themselves.  I haven’t met one who breaks with that tradition.  If those guys were being honest that bringing down that barrier is going to cause personal problems, sure, they could’ve been telling the truth.  But I would place my money on ‘hungry’.”  I pointed at the food, “If I was starving and I knew all I had to do was drop some cash on the doorstep of some dumb broad who could work portals...”

I stopped eating, the food suddenly tasting like putty, “How did they know I could work portals?”  I threw down my fork, “My uncle has a fat mouth.”

Killian sat down and placed his napkin on his lap like a grown-up.  “Your uncle is looking for you, and it makes sense he would warn them you have that ability.”

I turned to Killian and gave him a grim smile, “Here’s the plan.  We go to the docks while it’s daylight and check things out.  And then we jump worlds.  In case it’s true that the official portals are being watched, I’ll take us through a portal the officials don’t know about.  And then we find my uncle.  And then we end him.”

Killian took the coffee out of my hand, “I shall collect my things.”

Chapter 23

The docks were as I always remembered them.  The wood was silvery gray and the piers were covered in Other Side barnacles, which had a nasty habit of not being the nice, passive little creatures you find over on Earth.

Killian stuck close by my side, close enough that occasionally we would bump into one another.  I didn’t complain.

We got to Pier 67.  The warehouse’s windows were all blacked out and a heavy chain locked the door closed.  I didn’t see anyone, so I pulled a crowbar out of the back of my trunk and made my way to one of the windows.

“Do you think it is wise?”

“Nope,” I replied as I jimmied up the window.  If there was an alarm, we had minutes before security arrived.  If there had been magical protection, we’d already be dead.

But when I popped open the window, I didn’t see or hear anything.

“Give me a lift up, will you?”

Killian stuck his head between my legs and picked me up like we were at a concert on the 4
^th
of July instead of breaking into a warehouse.

“You could have just given me a lift with your hands,” I muttered.

“Your shoes have stepped in every manner of Other Side muck,” he replied.  “Plus, this is more fun.”

I kicked him lightly in the ribs.  Fun.  Totally my thoughts on the day.

“Do you see anything?” he asked.

The inside of the warehouse was filled with crates, floor to ceiling.  There was some sort of writing on each of them.  Looked Chinese, but my eastern character identification skills were not particularly honed.

I pulled myself up, Sweating to the Oldies eat your heart out, and dropped inside.

“Want to find something to pull me over?” Killian called.

I couldn’t believe this elf.  Not knowing what was in here and shouting like that.  Yes, we were probably okay if jimmying open the window and crawling inside hadn’t set off any alarms, but just because something appeared to be too easy didn’t mean it actually was.  Sometimes people made it easy by booby-trapping a place.  And, yes, sometimes they were just idiots.

“Stand watch!” I hissed.

I heard a loud rumble ricochet through the warehouse.  I pressed myself flat against the wall.  The coast clear, I somersaulted across the concrete and hid behind a stack of crates.

The sound came again.

And then I realized what it was.

Snoring.

Someone was frickin’ sleeping on the job.  I crept towards the center of the warehouse and the glow of an industrial scoop light. Slumped in some old, battered chairs by a wooden desk were three beef-headed trolls, the club-first-ask-questions-later type.  They were out so cold they were drooling on their shirts.

By their snoozing bodies were six empty pizza boxes.  I lifted one of the lids.  Someone had spiked it with toadstools, a fact three hungry trolls would have overlooked.  That’s the problem with interspecies security.  Yah, they could crush a car with their fist but they are dumb as a box of rocks.

But speaking of dumb, I would be an idiot if I ignored the fact someone had drugged a gaggle of trolls.  Said people probably had an interest in what was going on at Pier 67, and, most likely, would be along shortly to take advantage of said window of opportunity.  You know.  If they weren’t already here.

I started riffling through the papers on the desk.  Packing receipts, invoices, bladdity blah.  And then I came across one that gave me a little shiver down my spine.  “Stacked cold storage units” and the name of the funeral home I had set on fire.  Good times.

I looked over at the massive canyon of crates surrounding me.  None of them appeared to be big enough to hold units like we saw in the morgue.  I muttered a silent prayer that the powers of dark hadn’t invented a shrink ray and squished a bunch of mini-vampires into the boxes.

I just about came out of my skin as a hand rested on my shoulder.

“Maggie?”

“WHAT THE FUCK KILLIAN!  YOU DO NOT SNEAK UP ON ME EVER AGAIN!” I whisper-shouted at him.  I swear to god, I may have had a heart attack.  “How the hell did you get in here?”

“The back door was open.”

Great, I went breaking and entering when I could have just wandered in the back door.  It answered my question about whether the visitors were already here or on their way.  Looks like we just missed them.

“Listen,” I said, “you go search around the warehouse and see if you spot trouble.  I’m going to keep looking through files.  Hoot like an owl if we’re about to die.”

The trolls appeared to still be sawing logs like W.C. Fields after too many cups of eggnog.  Still, I carefully tiptoed as I continued my paper search.

“What do we have here?” I mused as I looked at an invoice.  “Lion.  Jade.  Arrival time 10:45AM.”

That was about a half hour before we showed up.  It had been signed for, too.

I looked over at the trolls.

“Who knocked you out...” I wondered out loud.

I heard the owl hoot and took off at a sprint.

Turned out to be a false alarm.

“I told you to hoot like an owl if you were in trouble.”

Killian grimaced, “This, my dear Maggie, is most definitely trouble.”

He pointed to a circle of intricate designs laid out in the ground like the one in the church.

“An illegal portal,” I said as I crouched down.  I scuffed my foot across the brimstone dust, breaking the circle and rendering it useless.