Luck of the Draw (Xanth) (37 page)

“He has my vote,” Arsenal said.

“I prefer the flower girl,” Anna said.

“We’ll vote when we’ve seen them all,” Bryce said.

“It won’t be a unified decision,” Anna said.

“Who cares?” Pose demanded. “We’re just marking time anyway.”

That might be the case. But Bryce was increasingly bothered by it. The prior challenges had been difficult, their prizes significant. Why should this be different? An insignificant challenge, with no prize for the Suitors. Could there be a purpose to this seemingly innocent activity? Surely there was more here than merely marking time.

The next contestant had the ability to become an inanimate object, then return to his own form. That was a good one, because normally transforming to, say, a block of wood would leave the person unable to speak or do anything, and he would be stuck. But again, that was all; there was no imaginative use of it, such as becoming a dress for a pretty girl to wear, and thus getting to appreciate her curves from up close.

Then came Mariah, with the talent of turning into a fox. She had devised elastic clothing that could handle either form.

How could this matter of judging a talent contest contribute to an edge for impressing the princess?

Maybe that was the key. Harmony was surely watching, and perhaps judging the judges by their decisions. Could she be looking for a mind rather than a physical gift? Would that put Bryce back in the running despite having no magic Object to offer? If so, he would have to try for it, because he was sure he did not want to suffer the wrath of a Demon for not campaigning hard enough.

Now a woman was demonstrating her talent of befriending birds. She could summon a sparrow to her hand, or get a roc to carry her. It was a good talent, but her use of it was no more than might be expected.

Judge not, lest ye be judged, Bryce thought. But he had to judge, and would be judged. At least he could advise the other Suitors, so they all had the same chance.

Now a man was showing how he could turn anything invisible, or visible. He demonstrated by making a woman’s clothing become invisible, so that she stood there in bra and panties. Then he made those invisible too. Fortunately she had a good figure. More fortunately, she was his wife, helping him make the demonstration. Another good talent, insufficiently exploited.

So Bryce had a hint about the importance of the presentation tomorrow. If only he had an Object to present!

Now a man demonstrated his talent of noticeability, making himself almost unnoticeable.

“Didn’t we see that before?” Lucky asked.

“That was anonymity,” Anna replied. “Similar, but not identical.”

A woman described and demonstrated her talent of Perspective. She walked away from her boyfriend until he looked to her to be only a few inches tall. Then she squinted, reached out, and picked him up as if he were a doll. He rose into the air. To others he did not look small, but what counted was how he looked to
her.
It was another potentially potent talent. She could probably move anything merely by standing far enough away from it to make it look small enough.

It occurred to Bryce that it would be best if she never realized the full potential of her talent. She could do a lot of damage if she wasn’t very careful.

At last the parade of talents was done. Bryce had made notes all along, not trusting his memory, and found that the magic pen worked perfectly well to write with.

“Now the judges will consult,” Trent said. “We will break for half an hour for refreshments, then return for the verdict.”

Mindy had set up a refreshment stand loaded with good things. Now she came to serve the Suitors, bringing little cups of tsoda pop from Lake Tsoda Popka, and biscuits.

They formed their chairs into a circle for discussion. “If I may,” Bryce said. “I think I have an important insight.”

“You have had them before,” Piper said. “I’m interested.”

“It is this,” Bryce said. “We have faced a serious challenge each day, and I’m not sure today is an exception. There may be something we have to learn or achieve today that will help us in our presentations tomorrow. So that it’s not the perhaps foolish whim of a teen girl that decides the issue. I suspect the point is not the talent contestants, but
us.
We may be judged as we judge others. We may need to fathom the real challenge, just as we have had to do throughout. The difference is that this one is not presented as such; we have to figure it out for ourselves.”

“Makes sense to me,” Piper said.

“And me,” Anna agreed.

“Well I don’t see it,” Arsenal said. “So they gave us a day off while they set up, put us to some useful incidental work. We don’t need to delve for nonexistent meanings.” Pose and Lucky nodded agreement.

Bryce shrugged. “I have said my piece. Let’s get on with the judging.”

It soon turned out the leading candidates were Wayne who could conjure weapons, and Flora who changed flowers. “Conjuring weapons is a man’s talent,” Arsenal said.

“And adapting flowers is a woman’s talent,” Anna said.

“He makes nice use of unlikely weapons, broadening his talent,” Pose said. “He could wipe her out.”

“She is really clever with the passion flower,” Piper said. “She could seduce him.”

“Power is what ultimately counts,” Lucky said.

“Subtlety can subvert power,” Bryce said.

They were unable to come to an agreement. The vote was tied with three for Wayne, three for Flora.

Trent came by. “What is your decision?”

“Tie vote,” Bryce said. “Wayne Weapons, Flora Flowers. That’s the best we can do.”

Trent nodded. “I will take it from here.”

Which way would he decide, to break the tie? He was a warrior, but also a man with considerable life experience.

The people returned to their seats, and Trent addressed them. “We have a tie vote between Wayne who summons weapons, and Flora who changes flowers. I am electing not to break that tie. The prize will be split between the two of you.”

“But those vials can’t readily be divided. What do you expect us to do, fight each other for it?” Wayne demanded.

Flora shook her head. “We can each take one vial, and maybe share the third.”

“I’ll take the healing elixir, for when I get wounded.”

“I’ll take the youth elixir, for when I get old.”

“That leaves the love potion,” Wayne said.

“Maybe we could share that,” Flora suggested.

Wayne considered. “You did not try to use a passion flower on me.”

“You did not threaten me with a weapon.”

“You know, you’re good-looking.”

“You’re handsome.”

The two gazed at each other. A small heart formed between them.

“I don’t think we need to open the love vial,” Wayne said.

“We can share it without opening it,” Flora agreed.

They came together. They kissed. A larger heart formed over their heads. Then they walked away together, sharing the complete prize.

The audience burst into applause. Then the assembly adjourned. It had been a successful event.

It seemed that Magician Trent had known what he was doing. Bryce marveled at how straightforward love could be, in this magic realm. Assuming that love match had not been set up as entertainment.

That evening Anna washed and changed without waiting for Bryce to turn his back. “It’s our last night,” she said. “Tomorrow if I don’t win for my brother, I’ll go with Piper. If he wins he’ll go with the princess. If anyone else wins, he and I will be together. You’re a good friend; I feel at ease with you.”

“Thank you,” Bryce said. “I feel the same.” But he averted his eyes at key moments, so as not to freak out.

“She wants to choose you,” she continued. “I know it. But you don’t have a gift, thanks to my interference.”

“She’ll be better off with one of the others.”

“I don’t think so.”

He shrugged. “What will be, will be.”

“You made good sense today. Something may be up. We don’t know what will happen tomorrow.”

“We don’t know,” he agreed. “But you should make sure to make the best presentation you can.”

“I will, thank you. What will you do, after?”

“I expect to return to Caprice Castle and help them collect puns. It’s useful work.”

“We’ll be there too. Piper has long experience, and I will be with him, so I’ll learn.”

“He’s a good man, regardless of his form.”

Bryce lay on his bed and pulled the cover up. Then Anna blew out the candle and came to join him. “Indulge me,” she whispered.

“Anna, what are you up to?”

“There is something I must do. That I must say, but can’t. As before.”

“You know I won’t touch you, any more than I would touch Mindy. Apart from everything else, you’re way too young.”

“I’m twenty-four. There are worse barriers than youth. Trust me.”

“I don’t understand.”

She’s serious,
the Queen Bee thought. Bryce was startled; he had forgotten about the Bee she had won. Could that telepathy help?

I can’t do this for you,
the Bee thought.
She’s beeing watched by her sponsor Demon. Not with full attention, not with even a fraction of one percent attention, but if she says something that relates to a key concept, she’ll bee in trouble.

Bryce realized that it was like a computer set to spot a particular word or situation. As long as it did not occur, the machine, or in this case Demon, would not be alerted.

“Play the game,” Anna whispered urgently. “The one we did before. While pretending to be using me, so that no one will catch on.”

“Using you!”

Kiss her. Feel her. Make it look good.

Oh. There was something serious on her mind that she couldn’t tell. She had been trying in her fashion to let him know, but he had stupidly been missing it. He had to make whatever was watching her think she was merely diverting herself with a spot tryst, not spilling secrets.

He braced himself, then kissed her and put a hand on her bottom over her nightie. Both were dangerously conducive. “Tell me how you feel about me,” he said.

“I hate you.”

That verified the reverse game. She was not his girlfriend, but she certainly didn’t hate him. Now how should he zero in on her concern, with her unable to advise him?

“I’m not sure exactly how to proceed,” he confessed, stroking that too-evocative bottom. What an anomaly!

Ask her about her brother.

Oho! He was not the one being watched, so he could speak freely though she couldn’t. It was another anomaly. “Why hasn’t your brother shown up yet? You’ve won the Queen Bee. You’ve done your part.”

“He can appear any time he chooses.”

That had to be a lie, but in what way? Why
couldn’t
the man appear to present the gift to the princess? “Is he incapacitated?”

This time she struggled for an answer. “No. Yes. Not exactly.”

Bryce’s head was feeling strained. “Is he imprisoned?”

“No. Not exactly.”

Get more basic.

Bryce got a notion. “Does he even exist?”

“Yes, at the moment.”

That was a lie? “Does he just pop in and out of existence?”

“No,” she said firmly.

Which meant yes. “Is he like a demon?”

“Yes.”

So that wasn’t it. “Does he change into something else?”

“No. Yes. Not exactly.”

So he did change, but maybe not completely. But why should that prevent him from showing up for this most important occasion?

Then Bryce got an idea that momentarily lighted the room. “He changed into you!”

“No,” she said gladly.

“One Demon selected him, but the others needed someone to distract me from winning an Object, so they turned him into you,” Bryce said. “You
have
no brother, exactly, because you
are
your brother.”

She kissed him hard. “No!”

“And you won’t get to change back unless you win the contest. There’s your incentive to perform.”

“No!”

“But now there’s a complication: you fell in love with Piper.”

“No!”

“So maybe you no longer want to change back. You prefer being a woman. So long as you can be with Piper.”

“No.”

“But you can’t tell Piper, because of that geis on you, that ban.”

“No.” Now he felt her tears against his face.

“And you want me to tell him, since you can’t.”

“No.” The tears increased.

Bryce considered. “Anna, I’m not going to do that. Here’s why: either you will win the princess, and convert, in which case Piper will know, albeit too late. Or you will not win, and I presume be locked into your female form for the rest of your life. So there’s no need to tell him. But if you feel you have to, you should be able to do it yourself, at a time of your choosing. You don’t need me for this.”

Idiot! She needs to know whether Piper will still want her when he learns. She’d rather die than have him bee repulsed by her.
The Queen Bee was thinking in bee dialect, of course, and couldn’t spell it “be” even in thought.

“But for what it’s worth,” Bryce continued, “Piper is a literal monster who has finally found a woman who loves him for himself. Surely he will be similarly tolerant of your situation.”

“Would
you
be?” She was able to ask a straight question.

That made him pause. He wasn’t sure. “Let me test my feelings,” he said. “To see whether I am or am not repulsed, now that I know the truth. I don’t want to seem to be making a move on you, but I think my body will not lie.”

“Never,” she said, taking his hand and threading it into her nightie so he could feel her bare torso.

He felt it, in its assorted curves and contours. He kissed her, and she met him more than halfway. She was completely female, physically. He had to react.

Then she threaded her hand into his pajamas and confirmed his arousal. He was not repulsed. Bemused by the anomaly, but turned on. “Thank you!” she breathed. Now that it was a question of physicality, she was no longer barred from expressing her honest sentiment.

“Now get away from me before I lose control,” he said.