Love, But Never (14 page)

              “Good news!” Sally said, returning to the desk.  Marissa got up and walked to meet her. “Kevin said you can have a room for the next two weeks, free of charge.”

              “REALLY?!” Marissa gushed.  “Thank you!  You have no idea what this means!  If he needs me to work extra hours while I’m here, I’m totally game.”

              “I’ll let him know, but that won’t be necessary.  He says you won’t get maid service, so you need to let him know when you need new sheets and such,” Sally explained, inputting the information into the computer and making Marissa a key.  “I’m glad you are getting out of there.”

              “Me, too,” Marissa smiled.

              “For good, right?  No going back?”

              “No going back,” she repeated, firmly.

              “Don’t let them bully you in to returning.  You are stronger than they give you credit for,” Sally smiled, handing Marissa her key.  “Room 212.”

              “Thank you!  Seriously.”  Marissa choked back the tears threatening to fall as she grabbed the key and left the lobby.  Before she could get to her room, her cell phone started to ring.  She was trying to balance everything in her hand as she answered her phone without checking the caller ID.

              “What the hell do you think you are doing?”

              “I moved out, dad,” she said.

              “YOU MOVED OUT?!” her father bellowed, furiously.  “I was just calling to reprimand you on the way you treated your mother and Jared this morning.  You need to get your ass home right now before I drag you home.”

              “No.  I’m not going anywhere,” Marissa responded, her voice shaky.  “I was going to move out in two weeks anyway, I’m just gone sooner.”

              “Are you at Susan’s or Tony’s?” he asked, still livid at the revelation.  “I’m on my way to get you.  I already told you that you aren’t allowed to move out.”

              “I’m at neither place.  Don’t try to find me, because I’m not coming home.  I’m done,” Marissa screeched, trying hard not to cry.  “I’m nearly twenty, dad.  You can’t make me do anything anymore.  The truck is in my name now; you can’t take it from me.”

              “You ungrateful little bitch.  How dare you talk to me like that?  I am your father and you will respect me,” his voice turning cold and even, but Marissa could tell he was about to snap.

              “I love you, dad.  I do!  I’m grateful for everything you have given me.  I just really need to be on my own for awhile.  It’s time,” Marissa decided to switch gears.

              “Fine…if that’s the way you want to be.  But don’t come to me when you can’t pay your rent or your tuition.  You are cut off until you decide to move home!”  Marissa heard the line go dead as she rolled her eyes at the notion that her parents had ever paid for her tuition or contributed to her education in any way since high school graduation.  She sat down on her bed for the next two weeks and took a deep breath.  Suddenly, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders and she knew she’d made the right decision to leave early.

**

AAndrews:
We have a show next week, Wednesday, you should come.

MMasterson:
Maybe, I’ll have to check my money situation.

AAndrews:
I can put you on the list- free?

MMasterson:
That might help, but it’s a gas thing, too.  I moved out of my parents’

AAndrews:
Yeah, you said you were going to…

MMasterson:
  I left early.  I’m staying at the hotel for another week before I move into my new place.

AAndrews:
I’m sorry you had to leave early.

MMasterson:
Me, too.  I’m just glad my boss let me stay here for free- otherwise, I’d have been stuck.

AAndrews:
  Why didn’t you stay at Tony’s?

             
‘Crap…I don’t want to have to explain this again…’

MMasterson:
  We aren’t really together anymore.

AAndrews:
  What does that mean?

              Marissa took a deep breath before slowly typing her response.

MMasterson:
We broke up.

AAndrews:
  WOW!  I’m so sorry!

MMasterson:
Thanks.

AAndrews:
You guys were together for a long time.

MMasterson:
Nearly a year.

AAndrews:
  Are you okay?

MMasterson:
  I will be, it’s hard to be a girlfriend for so long, and then suddenly be nothing, you know?

MMasterson:
Plus, he was always there for me when I needed him.

AAndrews:
I get that.  I’m here for you, too- you know, if you need me.

AAndrews:
Don’t forget that you have friends.

              Marissa smiled that he actually seemed to care.

MMasterson:
Thank you, you have no idea what that means to me.

AAndrews:
  If you need to talk, you have my cell number, right?

MMasterson: 
No, just your IM and email… 

AAndrews:
I’ll email you the number so you don’t lose it.  Please, call me anytime.

MMasterson:
  I don’t know

AAndrews:
  Let me be there for you, as a friend.

AAndrews:
Please

MMasterson:
  Okay, I’ll call you.

AAndrews:
Good.

“So what have you been up to the last week?” Aaron chuckled.  “Why has it taken you so long to call?”

“Ugh, just adjusting to the fact that one hundred percent of my meals have to be cooked in a microwave.  It’s not any different than before, but it gets annoying after awhile.  The mini fridge has an even mini-er freezer, so I’m running to the store all the time,” she complained.  “Either that, or I’ve got to get take out.”

“If you’d called earlier this week, I could’ve brought you some of the pasta we had left over.  It was incredible- alfredo.  It’s all gone now, though,” he enticed. 

“Sounds amazing.  I’m jealous.”

“Jealous? Of a pasta dish?  Oh honey, we’ve gotta get you some real food!  Want to come over for dinner tomorrow night?” he asked.

“I’m moving a few things over to Susan’s tomorrow and finishing the rest of my packing.  Then I’m working until eleven, but I would if I could,” she grinned that he’d even thought of feeding her something real so she could avoid pizza delivery, again.

“What are you up to tonight, then?” Aaron asked.  Marissa balanced her phone on her shoulder as she maneuvered the key card into the lock outside her room.

              “I’m still staying in the hotel tonight, plus I already had some minute rice and some leftover chicken from Chinese takeout,” Marissa answered, throwing the key card on the desk before sitting to remove her high-heeled Mary Janes.

              “Sounds gourmet,” Aaron said, flatly.  “Can just I come over and visit, then?” Aaron’s voice turned suggestive.

              “Um, I don’t know if that’s a good idea.  Tony is working tonight and if he sees you on one of the parking lot cameras…” she trailed off.  She’d, successfully, rebuffed Aaron’s advances at the Regret Lingers’ shows she’d been to over the time she was with Tony, but it has been more difficult than she was willing to admit.  The seeds of addiction he’d planted in her the previous year were starting to blossom deep inside her.

              “I thought you said you guys broke up?”

              “We…we are still seeing each other.  He says he still loves me, but he needs a break because we are getting too serious,” Marissa tried to explain the complex situation that she was in with her boyfriend.

              “So basically, he still wants to sleep with you, but he wants to see other girls, too?” Aaron summed up.

              “That’s what I’ve got from it.” She laughed, but knowing it was because they were broken and couldn’t stop fighting.  That she had been trying too hard to cling to a dying relationship.

              “Then you are free to spend time with me tonight.  Come on, Marissa!  It’s been almost a year and I don’t have a girlfriend this time.  Do you know how torturous it’s been to see you at my shows, knowing that I can’t touch you?” he pleaded.

              “Why me?” Marissa asked, “You had your pick of any girl at your show tonight, and I wasn’t there to torture you.”

              “Because, the prospect of having a chance with you again is too great. Please?” he begged.

              “Begging is
so
unbecoming of you,” Marissa chuckled.

              “It’s not my usual MO, but I can’t help it when it comes to you.  It’s like you wield some kind of power over me that I don’t understand,” he answered.

             
‘I don’t understand why he’s remotely interested in me when he can have anyone, but I know that I want him…’
Marissa’s thoughts trailed off when she heard him clear his throat to get her attention on the other end of the line.

              “Fine.  Call me when you get into the parking lot and I’ll tell you how to avoid the cameras,” she said, as if she was unsure, but she wasn’t.  Marissa still wanted him as much as she’d wanted him that night last year, maybe even more.

              “Great!” she could hear his grin through the phone. “I’m on my way.”

              “See you soon,” she said, pushing the end button on her cell and looking down at her uniform.
‘I have to change.’

              When she finished changing into her trademark blue boxers, she searched for a long sleeved t-shirt that would cover her arms, but came up empty.  She pulled her Mickey t-shirt on instead.  She hoped Aaron would be too intoxicated with her to notice the marks on her arm.  Her breasts strained against the tight fabric and she heard her cell phone ring behind her.  “Already?” she said to no one and checked the caller ID. She felt her throat tighten.
‘Nope. Tony. Shit.’

              “Hello?” she did her best to sound like he’d just woken her.

              “Ris? Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.  I was going to see if you wanted to come and hang out with me for a few?  The audit is underway, and all our check ins are here,” Tony explained.

              “Oh, I’d love to, but I’m really tired,” she lied, adding a yawn to sell it.

              “Okay, maybe I can come up after I get off work at seven?”

              “I’ve got to get to my parents’ early to start packing my truck or you know I’d say yes,” she said, sweetly, but knowing that wasn’t the reason.

              “Oh, okay, I’ll meet you at Susan’s to help you unload?” he offered.

              “Sounds great,” she yawned again, hoping he’d get the hint.  He did.

              “Good night then,” he sounded reluctant, just as Marissa’s call waiting beeped.

              “Alright, good night,” she said, brighter than before, and switched over to catch Aaron.

              “I’m here,” he said.

              “Okay, you need to take the drive around to the west side of the hotel and find a place to park.  Then, you need to keep your head down as you come to the door.  I will meet you to let you in.  You have to have a key to get into the building,” she rattled off the instructions as she grabbed her key and bolted out the door and down the stairs to meet him.

              When she got to the door to the building, her heart started to race when she saw him.  Marissa pushed the door open with her head down and pulled him inside.  Quickly, she yanked him up the stairs before Tony left the back office for any reason and rushed him into her room.  Once they were safely inside, she leaned back against the door and caught her breath.

              “Are you ashamed of me?” Aaron asked, looking wounded.

              “Of course not!  I just don’t want Tony to see you,” she smiled, slightly.

              “Why not?  You said you aren’t really together anymore…” he trailed off, “unless that’s not true, and you really can’t resist me, either.” His somber expression morphed into a wicked grin.

              “He’s just paranoid about you.  He knows you are the last person I slept with before he and I started dating and that I have a… weakness…for you,” she answered, looking at the floor.

              Aaron closed the distance between them, and put his finger under her chin to raise her gaze to his eyes.  Marissa tried to swallow the lump in her throat and wipe the shocked look from her face as she felt her back flush against the door.  “A weakness, eh? Is that how you put it?” He chuckled.  “I have the same affliction then.”

              His mouth came down on hers, and those feeling she’d felt nearly a year ago came crashing through her body again.  She felt a groan escape her lips and Aaron brought his body flush with hers, pining her hands above her head against the wall.  His lips traveled down to her neck, then nipped at her ear.

              “This is what I’ve been waiting for, way too long,” he whispered into her ear, and a jolt of electricity shot through her body, causing her to shiver against him with desire. “GOD! When you wore that red skirt to our last show, it took everything I had not to rip it off you right there in the alley when I saw you… and those fucking boots!  Were you trying to kill me?” he growled as his hands moved to explore her body and turn her toward her bed.

              “No,” she whispered against his lips, panting, as he pulled on the hem of her t-shirt, before ripping it over her head and moving his lips back to her neck.

              “Whoa!  Marissa!  What is this?!”  Aaron stopped kissing her bare shoulder and lifted her arm to eye level.  Marissa sighed and shut her eyes tight, trying to figure out what to say.  Aaron’s fingers lightly traced the perfect finger shaped bruises on her upper arm, which were now more yellow and brown than black and blue.  Slowly, his eyes never leaving Marissa’s, he softly kissed each of the bruises on her arm, something like compassion and anger flashing through his eyes.  Marissa held her breath and stared in wonder at the tender scene he was creating for her.