Lost Angel (41 page)

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Authors: Mandasue Heller

BOOK: Lost Angel
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‘You’re Angel’s dad, aren’t you?’

‘Yeah.’ He nodded. Then, straightening up when he realised who it was, he said, ‘Sorry, love, didn’t recognise you.’

‘Is – is it . . .’

She trailed off, but Johnny guessed that she was asking if she’d missed it. He nodded.

‘’Fraid so, love. You should have rung – we’d have held it up for five minutes if we’d known you were on your way.’

‘Oh, no,’ she said quietly, her face crumpling.

‘Hey, don’t get upset,’ Johnny said, trotting down the stairs. ‘You’re here now, so it’s not a total disaster. Ryan will be made up to see you.’

‘He won’t,’ she croaked, her eyes filled with pain as she looked up into his. ‘Not when he hears what I’ve got to tell him.’

‘Has something happened?’ Johnny asked, getting a horrible feeling that she was about to say that one of Ryan’s relatives had died. He just prayed it wasn’t the kid sister or baby brother, because that would destroy him.

‘I’m so sorry.’ Zeta’s tears had started to fall. ‘I couldn’t get hold of him, and it’s been really difficult to get out ’cos Gary’s been watching me like a hawk.’

‘What are you trying to say, love?’ Johnny frowned. ‘Only they’ll be out in a minute, and I don’t want anything to spoil their day. Tell me what’s up and I might be able to soften the blow.’

‘You won’t.’ Zeta shook her head. ‘No one can. It’s terrible, really terrible. And now it’s too late.’

‘What is?’

‘I can’t tell you. I shouldn’t even be here. Gary’s going to kill me if he finds out.’

‘Hey, you’re part of this family now,’ Johnny told her reassuringly. ‘And we look after our own, so don’t you worry about Gary. I’ll sort him out.’

‘You don’t understand,’ Zeta sobbed. ‘This is bad. Really, really bad.’

‘Come on, love, nothing’s so bad that it can’t be sorted.’ Johnny put his arm around her as she cried. ‘I can help. Just tell me what’s wrong.’

‘You’re his dad,’ Zeta mumbled.

Johnny jerked back, his face screwed up in disbelief. ‘Don’t be so ridiculous. Why would you say a thing like that?’

‘Because it’s true.’

Johnny felt the anger churn in his gut. The kids would come walking out at any minute, and their marriage would be damaged before it had even started if they were confronted by this crazy bitch spouting shit. He grabbed her arm and marched her away from the entrance.

‘Listen, love, I don’t know what kind of sick game you’re trying to play here, but it ain’t on. Your son and my daughter have just got married, and they’re about to have a baby. Have you any idea what it would do to them if they heard what you were saying?’

‘It’s true,’ Zeta insisted. ‘I wish it wasn’t, but it is, and there’s nothing I can do to change it. That boy’s my life. Don’t you think I know how much this will hurt him?’

‘So fuckin’ pack it in before he hears it,’ Johnny ordered. ‘I wouldn’t mind, but I’d never even seen you before I came round to yours a few weeks back.’

‘It was a long time ago,’ Zeta sobbed. ‘You’ve forgotten.’

‘I’m not being rude,’ Johnny said, ‘but I have
never
slept with a black woman in my life. If I had, believe me, I’d remember.’

‘I used to work at LA Ladeez,’ she told him.


And?
’ He shrugged. ‘I don’t even know what that is.’ Then, glancing nervously back at the door, he said, ‘Look, love, it’s your problem if you screwed around behind your old man’s back, but don’t try and drag me into your mess.’

‘Ryan is yours.’ Zeta was adamant.

Johnny’s patience snapped. ‘Just fuck off back to your crack pipe, or whatever you’ve been taking that’s got your head all twisted up,’ he snarled. ‘And keep your whacked-out fantasies to yourself.’

‘Johnny . . . ?’ Ruth called out just then. ‘Are you out here? Where are you? They’re about to come out.’

‘Coming,’ Johnny called back. Then, giving Zeta one last warning look, he shook his head and ran back up the steps.

Dave and Hannah followed the wedding party back to the house in their own car. There had been no chance to talk back at the registry office, but Dave had something on his mind.

‘I want a word with you,’ he said quietly, pulling Johnny out into the back garden.

‘What’s up?’ Johnny asked, taking out of his pocket the spliff he’d made earlier and walking around to the bushes to light up.

‘Who was that woman you was talking to?’ Dave demanded. ‘And don’t say you wasn’t, ’cos I saw you. And if it was one of your tarts, you’re bang out of order for fetching her near Angel’s wedding.’

A grin spread over Johnny’s face as his friend told him off. ‘Finished?’ he asked when he stopped. ‘First off, no, it was
not
one of my tarts – as you put it. And second, I’d never do anything to upset Angel, and you should know that.’

‘I do,’ Dave conceded, taking the spliff when Johnny offered it to him. ‘But you’ve got to think about how it would have looked to her if she’d walked out and seen you. Who was it, anyhow? And why was she crying? Is it someone you’ve dumped?’

‘Will you be told? She’s nothing to do with me,’ Johnny reiterated sounding amused. ‘If you must know, it was Ryan’s mam, and she’s mad as a fuckin’ hatter, so I was telling her to clear off.’

‘Why, what happened?’ Dave sucked deeply on the smoke and glanced back to make sure that Hannah wasn’t watching through the parlour window. She didn’t mind him having the occasional smoke, but she wouldn’t approve on a day like this.

Johnny rolled his eyes. ‘You’re not going to believe it, but she only tried to tell me I’m his dad. Now is that crazy, or is that crazy?’

‘You’re kidding?’ Dave snorted. ‘You’re not even black. Like,
hello
!’

‘Neither’s his dad,’ said Johnny. ‘But that’s not the point.’

‘So what did you say?’

‘I said, I don’t know what sick game you’re playing, but you’d best quit it before someone hears you and starts spreading it about. Can you imagine the shit
that
’d cause?’

‘Volcanic.’ Dave shook his head. ‘Is she a crackhead or something?’

‘That’s what I thought, so I told her to get back to her pipe and leave me out of her fantasies.’

‘Too right.’ Dave chuckled and passed the spliff back.

Johnny drew on it. ‘I told her, I said I’m not being rude, love, but I’ve never slept with a black woman in my life. But – see how fucked her head is? – she goes, I used to work at LA Ladeez. Like that was supposed to mean something.’

‘Eh?’ Dave narrowed his eyes. ‘Say again?’

‘LA Ladeez,’ Johnny repeated, frowning. ‘Do you know what it is?’

‘Oh, mate.’ Dave ran a hand over his suddenly sweaty face. ‘That’s the club where we took you on your stag night.’

‘And . . . ?’ Johnny’s mouth had gone dry.

‘And the lads put to, and we kind of paid for you to have some private entertainment,’ Dave admitted. ‘But you were totally kaylied, so there’s no way you could have got it up.’

Johnny gaped at him for several long moments. Then, grinning again, he threw a playful punch at his arm.

‘Nice one, mate, you had me going for a minute there.’

But Dave didn’t smile. He just held Johnny’s gaze with a guilty one of his own, and Johnny’s heart sank like a brick.

‘You’re not kidding, are you?’

Dave shook his head.

A terrible flashback leapt into Johnny’s mind, and he was back in the hotel bar with Frankie.

‘Forget about the slags . . . I’ve decided to let it slide this time . . .’

Then he was in bed with Ruth in the honeymoon suite, his eyes closed, a hazy vision of a woman . . . his cock in her mouth.

‘Who did you set me up with?’ he demanded. ‘What colour?’

‘There were two of ’em,’ Dave told him. He sounded sick. ‘One black, one white.’

Johnny turned and stared through the parlour window at Ryan, who was making his way around the room offering sandwiches to the guests. No way . . . there was no way the boy could be his son. No way on Earth. It just wasn’t possible.

‘You’d best talk to his mam again,’ Dave suggested quietly. ‘At least you’d know, one way or the other.’

‘Nah, it’s bollocks.’ Johnny shook his head. ‘Look at him. He looks nothing like me.’

‘But you can’t know that for sure,’ Dave said gravely.

‘I can’t.’ Johnny gritted his teeth. ‘What if it turns out he
is
mine? What am I supposed to tell Angel? That she’s just married her brother, and is about to have his baby? It’ll destroy her.’

What was left of the colour in his cheeks drained completely when another thought occurred to him.

‘What the fuck am I supposed to tell Ruth? She’s put up with a lot, but there’s no way she’d stand for this. And I’ll lose everything if she divorces me. I signed a contract – I’ll be out on my arse.’ He looked at Dave with dread in his eyes. ‘I’m finished.’

‘No point thinking that far ahead,’ Dave said calmly. ‘Let’s just take it one step at a time. Talk to Ryan’s mam, and we’ll take it from there. Yeah?’

‘Yeah.’ Johnny nodded and sighed heavily. One of the best days of his life had just become the absolute worst.

35

Angel and Ryan had insisted that they wanted to go to Blackpool for their honeymoon. Johnny had tried to persuade them to choose somewhere more exotic, somewhere at least
sunny
. But they just wanted to have fun, and there was nothing more attractive to a couple of kids than a massive funfair and an endless row of slot-machine arcades. And the beach was just across the road, so it was heaven on all counts.

They were so excited when they came downstairs with their suitcase after the somewhat subdued party that Johnny had to force himself to smile, even though his heart felt like it had a lead weight in it.

‘Ready?’ he asked, reaching for his car keys.

They nodded, their faces beaming as they clutched at each other’s hands.

‘Can you give me a lift?’ Lisa asked as they headed for the door.

‘Yeah, sure,’ Johnny murmured, waving her out.

‘You’ll come straight back, won’t you?’ Ruth asked as she came out onto the step to wave them off.

‘I just need to nip down to the yard and do a bit of paperwork,’ Johnny lied. ‘But I’ll try not to be too late.’

‘Can’t Dave do it?’ she asked, standing close and stroking his lapels. ‘I thought we could have an early night.’

‘I’ll try,’ he said unenthusiastically. Then, remembering that he was going to have his work cut out to keep her if Ryan’s mother turned out to be telling the truth, he kissed her and winked. ‘See you in a bit.’

Lisa stayed in the car when Johnny got out to walk Angel and Ryan into the train station. When he came back she had her arms folded, her legs crossed, and a furious scowl on her face.

‘What’s going on, Johnny?’

‘What do you mean?’ he asked as he set off.

‘You know what I mean, so don’t act stupid,’ she snapped. ‘All that kissy-kissy shit with Ruth. Angel’s gone now, there’s no reason to keep up the act.’

‘Not now,’ Johnny groaned. ‘I’ve got shit to deal with, and my head’s already mashed.’

‘What shit?’

‘Nothing that concerns you.’

‘Don’t you dare try and fob me off with that old line.’ Lisa bristled. ‘I’m not Ruth. You can’t just pat me on the head and tell me to keep my nose out of man stuff. I’ve wasted the past twenty years of my life waiting for you.’

‘Wasted?’ Johnny repeated, with a dry smile. ‘Like that, is it? Well, sorry for wasting your time, darlin’. Maybe you’d best stop holding out for something you’re never gonna get, then, eh?’

‘You bastard,’ Lisa hissed, tears flooding her eyes. ‘You’re not dropping me like that. I’m worth more than that, and you know it.’

Johnny sighed heavily. ‘Yeah, I know, and I didn’t mean to upset you. But you know the score. If I walk, I lose the lot.’

‘You’d still have me,’ Lisa reminded him.

‘And you’d get bored without the money,’ Johnny told her. ‘And don’t lie and say it doesn’t mean anything, ’cos we both know you’d hate it if I was skint. We’d be at each other’s throats in no time. Then
you
’d probably chuck
me
out, and that’d be it. I’d have lost everything. The business, Angel – and you.’

‘I’d never chuck you out,’ she insisted. ‘You still don’t get it, do you, Johnny? I
love
you.’

‘And I love you, too.’ He sighed. ‘But we’ve got to be realistic.’

‘That’s all I’ve ever been,’ Lisa replied resignedly. ‘Dreams are for kids like Angel,’ she added wistfully. She’d envied her cousin for getting married before her, and now even her cousin’s
kid
had beaten her up the aisle. A few more years and no man would look twice at her, never mind ask her to marry him.

‘I’m sorry,’ Johnny said. ‘This isn’t how I planned for things to turn out, but it is what it is. And it’s not
that
bad, is it?’ He reached over and gave her thigh a squeeze. ‘We’ve still got this.’

‘Yeah, but I’m still sharing this with Ruth,’ Lisa muttered.

‘I spend more time with you than I do with her,’ Johnny pointed out.

‘But you don’t sleep in my bed,’ Lisa said quietly, swiping a rogue tear off her cheek. ‘I never get to wake up next to you. I never got to have a kid with you, or call you my husband. And I never will, will I?’

She gazed at him, but Johnny kept his eyes firmly on the road. There was no point saying anything when she got like this. He just had to let her pour it all out, and then make it all better with a bit of loving.

Lisa exhaled loudly and stared out of the window as they drove on.

When they reached Hulme, Johnny turned off Chester Road a couple of streets back from hers.

‘What are you doing?’ Lisa asked as he drove slowly down the road towards Ryan’s parents’ house.

‘Just need to check something out,’ he murmured.

‘Like what? Ryan’s not even here. You’ve just seen them off on the train – remember?’

Johnny stared at the house as they passed, and Lisa frowned. ‘What’s wrong, Johnny? Have you got some kind of beef with them? Is that why they weren’t at the wedding?’

‘Jeezus, will you quit with the questions?’ he snapped, putting his foot down and screeching around the corner.

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