Lost Angel (37 page)

‘If you’re talking about Angel, I haven’t seen her,’ Ryan told him truthfully.

‘Don’t fucking lie to me!’ Johnny seized him by the throat and pushed him out onto the landing, forcing him back against the banister rail. ‘You’ve got two seconds to tell me where she is, or I’m going to shoot you,’ he growled as he rammed the muzzle of a gun into his stomach.

‘On my life,’ Ryan gasped, his eyes widening with fear. ‘I swear she ain’t here, Mr C . . .’

The noise had woken Zeta and she opened her bedroom door. ‘Oh, sweet Jesus!’ she shrieked when she saw what was happening. ‘
GARY . . . ! GARRRYYYY!
’

‘Mum, just go back to bed,’ Ryan told her, trying to keep his voice even. ‘I can handle this.’

His dad had woken up by now and he lumbered out onto the landing, rubbing sleep from his eyes. ‘What’s going on?’

‘Get the fuck back in there before I shoot the lot of you,’ Johnny warned through gritted teeth without looking around.

‘Just go,’ Ryan told his parents urgently. ‘Everything’s all right . . . there’s been a misunderstanding, that’s all. But I’ll sort it.’

Gary didn’t need telling twice. He was a fist merchant, not a bullet dodger, so he grabbed Zeta and hauled her, still screaming, back into their bedroom. He slammed the door shut behind them.

‘Where is she?’ Johnny asked again.

‘She’s not here,’ Ryan repeated truthfully. ‘I haven’t seen her since you told me to stay away from her that night.’

‘You’re lying.’ Johnny jabbed him with the gun.

Ryan winced as pain flared in his still-bruised ribs. He gritted his teeth. ‘I’m not, I swear. You can shoot me if you want, but please don’t hurt my mam or the kids. And don’t do it here,’ he begged. ‘If you’re gonna do it, take me somewhere where they don’t have to watch me die.
Please
.’

Johnny heard the sincerity in Ryan’s voice and knew instinctively that he was telling the truth. If he was brave enough to offer up his life to protect his family, he was brave enough to front up to Johnny about Angel. But he was still saying that she wasn’t here.

‘If she comes, you’d better ring me,’ Johnny said. He stuck the gun back into his waistband and headed for the stairs.

Unaware that Angel
had
been round tonight and that his mum had seen her off, Ryan followed Johnny outside.

‘I know you hate me,’ he said, ‘and I don’t blame you, ’cos I was bang out of order for going round to your place like that. But I love her, Mr Conroy, and if she’s missing I want to help find her.’

Johnny could tell that he meant what he’d said, and he had to admire his guts for coming after him after having had a gun pulled on him. But if he hadn’t crossed the line and put his filthy hands on Angel in the first place, none of this would be happening. Johnny wasn’t about to let him think that it was all forgiven and forgotten.

Lisa came around the corner just as Johnny unlocked his car. ‘Any luck?’ she asked as she ran up to them.

Johnny shook his head.

‘How long’s she been gone now?’

‘An hour, maybe more,’ Johnny told her, ashamed that he couldn’t be more accurate. But Ruth had only realised an hour ago that Angel had gone and she’d delayed telling him because she’d been scared that he would blame her.

‘Well, I’ve rung everyone in the family, but no one’s seen her,’ said Lisa.

‘I know – Ruth’s already tried.’

‘What about
your
family?’ Ryan ventured. ‘I know she doesn’t really know anyone from your side,’ he went on, feeling disloyal, because this was stuff that Angel had trusted him to keep to himself. ‘But it might be worth a try.’

Lisa looked at Johnny and shrugged. ‘She has asked me about your mum a few times in the past. I’ve never met her, so I couldn’t tell her anything. But she’s definitely curious.’

Johnny pursed his lips and thought about it, but quickly ruled it out. ‘Nah. She wouldn’t know where to find her. Ring me if she turns up.’ He climbed into the car and pulled away from the kerb with a squeal of tyre rubber.

Ryan ran his hands through his hair as he watched Johnny go, and Lisa saw the worry in his eyes.

‘Don’t worry, he’ll find her,’ she said quietly. ‘She won’t have gone far.’

‘Why did she run away, though?’ Ryan wanted to know. ‘That’s what’s worrying me. I haven’t seen or heard from her in weeks, and Johnny was really mad when he caught us that night. You don’t think he’s done something to her, do you?’

‘Johnny’s
never
laid a finger on that girl in anger,’ Lisa told him emphatically. ‘She’ll just be scared ’cos . . .’ She caught herself and trailed off without finishing the sentence.

‘Scared ’cos what?’ Ryan demanded, sensing that she’d been about to say something significant. Irritated when she shook her head, he said, ‘Come on, Lisa, she’s fifteen, and she’s out there on her own in the dark. If you know what’s going on, just tell me.’

‘I can’t,’ she replied guiltily. ‘It’s not my place.’

‘Neither’s screwing her dad, but that didn’t stop you.’

Lisa’s mouth dropped open. ‘How dare you!’

‘Don’t do this,’ Ryan groaned. ‘I saw you, okay? But I didn’t tell Angel, so I don’t think it’s got anything to do with her running away.’

‘No, it has not,’ Lisa said indignantly, determined to front it out. ‘And what do you mean, you saw us?’

‘That night when Johnny caught me and Angel,’ Ryan told her, sighing. ‘I was walking home from work and I saw him pull up outside yours.’

‘That’s nothing,’ Lisa said dismissively. ‘He pops round all the time to check I’m okay. We’re family – it’s perfectly normal.’

‘And is sticking your tongue down your relatives’ throats normal?’ Ryan gave her a knowing look.

Lisa blushed and folded her arms. ‘I hope you haven’t told anyone what you
think
you saw, ’cos Johnny won’t be too pleased if it gets back to him.’

Ryan was fed up with playing games. ‘Look, I’m not even arsed what you and Johnny get up to,’ he told her bluntly. ‘I just want to know why Angel’s run away. I’m worried about her.’

Lisa narrowed her eyes and stared at him for several long moments. Johnny had only just told her about the baby but he obviously didn’t want Ryan to know or he’d have told him when he was here just now. But that was half the trouble with this family: they were too fond of keeping secrets. They were all so busy trying to hide what they were feeling and thinking that they were strangling themselves and each other. Ryan was better off out of it, in her opinion. But he had the right to make that decision for himself. Whereas Johnny and Ruth – and especially Rita – did
not
have the right to decide if his child lived or died.

‘Angel’s pregnant,’ Lisa told Ryan. ‘But you didn’t hear that from me.’

Ryan gaped at her. ‘You’re kidding me!’

She shook her head and gazed back sadly at him. ‘And I’ve only just found out myself, so don’t think I’ve been keeping it from you.’

‘I can’t believe it,’ he croaked. ‘Why didn’t she tell me?’

‘She didn’t know till this afternoon,’ Lisa said. ‘When Johnny came to mine, looking for her, he said her mum had made her do a pregnancy test and when it came back positive she made an appointment to get it aborted.’

‘Angel wants to abort my baby?’ Ryan looked hurt and confused all at once. ‘Without even telling me?’

‘No,
she
wants to keep it,’ said Lisa. ‘But
they
won’t let her. That’s why she’s run away. I’m so sorry.’

‘It’s not your fault,’ Ryan said quietly. ‘Thanks for telling me. I know it can’t have been easy.’

‘You won’t tell Johnny, will you?’ Lisa’s eyes were filled with worry. ‘He really is trying to do his best by Angel and none of this is to spite you – you do know that, don’t you? It’s just hard for him to accept that his child’s growing up. Must be hard for any parent,’ she added wistfully.

‘I wouldn’t know,’ Ryan said bitterly. ‘Seeing as they didn’t even want me to find out about it. Christ, why didn’t she come to me? We could have talked to them. Together.’

‘It probably wouldn’t have got you anywhere,’ Lisa told him sadly. ‘They’re not exactly big on letting people interfere in family business.’

‘This is my family as well,’ Ryan reminded her. ‘
My
baby.’

‘I’m sorry,’ Lisa said again. ‘If there was anything I could do . . .’

‘It’s not your fault.’ Ryan exhaled wearily. ‘And, don’t worry, I won’t tell Johnny you told me. I just hope he finds her, ’cos now there’s not just her to worry about.’

Lisa gave him a regretful smile and apologised yet again. Then, biting her lip, she said goodbye and went home. She felt terrible, and wondered if she’d done the wrong thing by telling him. He wasn’t going to have any say in what happened, so maybe he’d have been better off not knowing.

Ryan’s head felt like it was imploding as he walked miserably back into his house. He couldn’t believe that the Hyneses were just going to kill his baby without even telling him about it. That was so wrong. But there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. Johnny had already proved that he was capable of doing just about anything to keep Ryan and Angel apart.

His dad was waiting behind the front door. The punch caught Ryan completely off guard and knocked him flat on his back.

‘Pleased with yourself, you little bastard?’ Gary loomed over him with his teeth bared and his fists clenched. ‘Bringing twats like that round to my door and scaring the fucking life out of your mother?’

‘It was a misunderstanding,’ Ryan told him again, holding a hand to his bleeding mouth as he gazed up at his father.

‘
Misunderstanding?
’ Gary roared as he kicked him in the ribs. ‘I’ll give you fucking misunderstanding!’

Johnny drove around the area for a good thirty minutes without seeing a soul. The streets were deserted, and his heart was growing heavier by the minute. There was just no place he could think of where Angel might have gone, other than to Lisa’s or Ryan’s. She was really upset – but was she upset enough to do something stupid? That was what was worrying him now. They had backed her into a corner when she’d been at her most vulnerable, and it had pushed her over the edge. And he was as much to blame for that as Ruth was. She might have made the decision to arrange the abortion, but he’d gone along with it without giving a second thought to what Angel might have wanted. They were treating her like a child who had no right to make her own decisions. But, like Lisa had said, Angel was a young woman now. She would be sixteen in a matter of weeks, and that wasn’t so much younger than Ruth had been when she and Johnny had got married. And Ryan seemed genuinely to care about her, whereas Johnny hadn’t given a toss about Ruth.

Deep in thought, he didn’t realise he was heading towards his mum’s estate until he pulled up outside the flats. He switched the engine off and peered up to the third floor. It was a long shot – a
really
long shot – but he was here now.

Cathy had made up the spare bed and given Angel an old nightie to wear. Then, after making sure that the girl was settled, she’d gone to bed.

Angel had been on the verge of falling asleep when the door creaked open. Her heart gave a painful lurch when she squinted at the silhouette outlined in the dim light and realised that it was Les. His leering smiles in the kitchen had unnerved her, and when her grandmother had left them alone while she made the bed he’d put his hand on her leg and stroked it up and down. She’d wanted to run out of there but she’d been too scared. Then her grandmother had come back and brought her to this room, so she’d thought she would be okay.

‘You awake?’ Les whispered as he crept towards the bed.

Angel held her breath. She could smell alcohol and the rancid scent of sweat. He sat down heavily, and her body bounced as his weight bore down on the mattress.

‘I’ve never seen anyone as pretty as you,’ Les crooned, reaching out and stroking her shoulder as she lay hunched under the quilt. ‘You remind me of a girl I used to know. She was my girlfriend. Her name was Jillian. She said I was the best boyfriend she ever had ’cos I treated her real good . . . Do you want me to treat
you
good, an’ all?’

His breath was coming in short, wheezy little bursts as his stroking continued.

Angel bit her lip to keep from crying out. She just wanted him to think that she was asleep and go away.

‘I can show you a good time,’ Les whispered as his fingers found the edge of the quilt and peeled it down slowly. ‘You and me could have some real good fun. And I’ve got lots of money, so if you play nice I’ll buy you anything you want.’

The doorbell rang. Les jumped, and Angel heard him breathe in sharply.

The bell rang again, and then the caller started hammering with the knocker. The noise woke Cathy and she wandered out into the dark hall.

‘Les . . . ?’ she hissed. ‘Les, where are you?’

Les got up and tiptoed to the door. ‘I’m in the bathroom,’ he called through the crack, trying to throw his voice to make it sound as if he was on the other side of the corridor. ‘See who it is and go back to bed.’

Cathy put the chain across and opened the door a crack. Her jaw dropped when she saw Johnny standing there.

‘All right, Mum?’ he said quietly, his stomach churning at the sight of her. It had been a long, long time. ‘Sorry to disturb you, but I don’t suppose my daughter’s been here, has she? Her name’s Angel.’

‘I know,’ Cathy murmured, her eyes glittering with tears as she gazed at him. Her lovely boy had become a really handsome man.

‘Is she here?’ Johnny asked, surprised, because he hadn’t actually expected her to be. He’d half expected to find that his
mother
wasn’t even here, that she had moved out years ago, or died, or something. But she
was
here, and so was Angel. ‘I need to see her.’

‘She’s asleep,’ Cathy told him. ‘Why don’t you come back in the morning? It’ll give her time to think, and then we can all sit down and talk.’

‘What are you talking about?’ Johnny frowned. ‘This has got nothing to do with you. You don’t even know her.’

‘She’s scared, son. She came and found me, so I’ve got a duty to look after her.’