Lorie's Heart (20 page)

“Be right there,” Lorie called.

“You go on ahead,” Betty said to Stan. “I'll wait on them.”

“I hope you're not hoping for leprechaun pudding today,” he grumbled. Apparently his good mood over painting could only last so long.

Betty shook her head. “I'm not worried about that. Not as long as I get to eat with my granddaughter.”

 

 

“How does a person go about finding someone?” Lorie cut her gaze to Zach as he drove the little orange car toward his sister's house.

“Internet, I guess.”

“Like on the computer?”

“Exactly like the computer.”

“Can you help me?”

He pulled the car into his sister's drive and turned to face her. “Who do you want to find?”

“My mother's family. I figure if I'm going to be here, then I should at least try to find them.” She chewed on her lip as the doubts surfaced. “Do you think that's a bad idea?”

“Only if you don't want to find them.”

“Will you be serious?”

“Sorry.” He shot her a sheepish grin. “If you want to find them, then I think you should.”

“I don't know.” Lorie laid her head back on the seat rest and closed her eyes. “I don't know what to do.”

“Are you staying?” he asked. “Here, I mean. In Tulsa. Away from the Amish.”

She rolled her head toward him and opened her eyes. “I don't know.”

The clear blue of his eyes grew cloudy. “That's something you'll have to decide.”

“It's complicated, huh?”

“Very.”

“What do I do?” Why were there so many decisions to be made? She wasn't sure how long she could stay in Tulsa, with Zach. She didn't want to leave him, but could she adjust like Luke had to
Englisch
living? Did she want to? She missed her family. But she couldn't go home without the answers she needed. The only way to get those answers would be to talk to her mother's family. And there was only one way to do that. “Will you help me find them?”

“Of course.”

She smiled in what she hoped was confidence. But she prayed that she was making the right decision.

 

 

It took everything Zach had not to try to persuade Lorie to stay. It was selfish and unfair, but he wanted to all the same. If he was being honest with himself—not at all like he had been with Ashtyn—he was falling in love with Lorie. There. He'd admitted it. And that was the first step to recovery. But did that only count against addiction? What did one do to get over an impossible love?

He sat down at his sister's kitchen table and booted up his laptop.

“Are you certain this will work?” Lorie asked.

“I am. Are you certain you want to do this?”

She sighed. “Just because I look them up doesn't mean I have to go visit them.”

“That's right.”

“Then let's do it.”

It wasn't hard to find the affluent Prescotts of Dallas, Texas.

“That's my family?” Lorie asked, her eyes wide as she stared at the pictures of the mansion on the computer screen.

Zach couldn't imagine how she was feeling. She came from a humble background. The images before her were anything but.

“How does one family get so much?” she whispered.

He scrolled down, though her eyes remained transfixed on the screen. “It says here they dabbled in ranching and then found oil on their property. Looks like they sold everything off and now they dabble in anything that will make them more money.” He couldn't imagine the sweet woman at his side coming from such a materialistic family.

No. He needed to be fair. Just because the Internet claimed they were only concerned with the bottom line didn't mean it was true. Everyone deserved a chance to counter what was written about them.

“Well, there they are.”

She nodded. “Okay.”

“I doubt they're going anywhere. You have all the time in the world to decide if you want to visit them or not.”

“I wish that were true.”

He turned away from the screen and took her hands into his own. “Lorie, I've been debating on whether or not I should say this. So I'm just going to put it out there. You can stay here. Not at Ashtyn's maybe, but here in Tulsa. We can find you a place to live, a job. If you want to, that is.”

She stared down at their hands. “I don't know what I want.” She shook her head. “That's not true. I want to visit with the seniors every day and have you teach me to drive. I like wearing jeans and leaving my hair down. But if I stay, then I can't return to Wells Landing.”

“Is that one of those rules?”

“That's one of my
mamm'
s rules. She doesn't want me to come back and influence the other children into following my steps.”

“So if you stay here, this is all you have?” He stood, suddenly full of too much energy.

“Basically. Yes.”

“And if you return, you have to give up everything that you've been doing here.”

She nodded.

“And painting?”

“Painting is definitely not approved. What should I do?”

He reached out again and pulled her to her feet. “I don't have any advice to give you, Lorie.” The sadness on her face was almost more than he could bear. Why did she have to choose? Why did it have to be one or the other? He trailed his fingers down her cheek, loving the feel of her skin under his.

“I know,” she whispered. Her eyes fluttered closed, and he knew she was feeling it, the same as he was. That pulling attraction. But was it the lure of the forbidden or truly something special happening between them?

He should stop the madness before it went too far. He'd told his sister that he couldn't fall in love with Lorie because he hadn't even kissed her. So he shouldn't kiss her now. That was just heading into dangerous territory. Yet he was powerless to stop himself. Or maybe he simply didn't want to.

He pulled her closer, lowered his head, and touched his lips to hers.

She was everything he had dreamed about and more. Full of innocence and wonder, adventure and sweetness. And he wanted the kiss to never end. Did that mean he was in love?

Love was such a strong word. It was a kiss. That was all. Any red-blooded American man would do the same. Kiss her and see what she tasted like, what she felt like in his arms. Test her warmth in his embrace. But that didn't mean love. It was attraction, chemistry, a little too much life-stress. Stress, yeah, that was it.

She sighed as his mouth moved over hers. A sweet innocent sigh that made him think of things not so innocent. He had to put a stop to this and quickly. She wasn't like the other girls he'd dated. She wasn't versed in the ways of the world. He would punch anyone who took advantage of her. He had to stop before he needed to take a swing at himself.

He released her and set her back, a little away from him. “I'm not going to apologize. I've wanted to do that since the very first time I saw you.”

She pressed the back of one hand to her lips. Her eyes were dark and unreadable. She looked as shocked as he felt. Maybe that was a good thing. He hoped it was.

“I don't want you to apologize.”

He nearly slumped in relief. To say he was sorry would take away all the spectacular delight in what just happened.

“Whew, what a day! I'm thinking pizza for supper.” Ashtyn came through the back door, stopping just inside at the sight of them standing there. She set her purse on the cabinet and looked at each of them in turn.

There was no hiding what had happened between them. The look on Lorie's face was enough to tell the truth. And he had the feeling that his expression was just as dumbfounded.

Something else had happened, something more than a kiss. Something deep and mysterious, as old as time itself. Was that love?

“Are you staying for supper, Zach?”

“Huh?” He turned his attention back to his sister only realizing then that he had been staring at Lorie once again. “Supper, yeah, sure.”

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Ashtyn asked. “Alone.” She wrapped her hand around his arm and pulled him from the room. For the first time since they were kids, he let his big sister push him around. She shoved him into the tiny hall bathroom and shut the door behind them. She leaned back against the door and crossed her arms. “Explanation, please.”

“Explain what?” He was stalling; it was apparent to both of them. But he needed a little more time to figure out what he was feeling before he started telling his sister about it.

“What I just walked in on in my own house.”

“Certainly not what you're thinking you interrupted. It was just a kiss.”
Liar.

“So there is something going on between the two of you.”

Zach shook his head and breathed a heavy sigh. Finally he got enough air into his lungs that his brain was functioning properly once again. “A kiss,” he said again. “I kissed her. That's all.”

But his sister was nothing if not shrewd. “That must have been some kiss. You look like you've been hit by a train.”

He stepped in front of the mirror to look at himself. He did look a bit ragged. But finding out that he might possibly be in love with an Amish girl whose family was one of the wealthiest in east Texas and then kissing that girl until the breath caught in his lungs . . . well, that tended to show on a guy's face.

“Whatever,” he said.

“Don't whatever me. I haven't been married twice without seeing that look before. Just be careful,” she said. “This situation . . . well, it looks like it would be too easy to hurt or get hurt. And I don't want that for either one of you.”

He nodded. “I will.” But he feared it was already too late.

He had fallen in love with an Amish girl.

Lorie managed to keep herself together all through dinner and the marathon of sitcoms that Zach and Ashtyn insisted on watching. In truth, she enjoyed the zany antics of the two girls and one guy who shared an apartment. She didn't get all of the jokes, but she had fun watching the two of them laugh together.

But when Zach finally said good night and let himself out, Lorie said she was going to bed too. In the privacy of the little dinosaur room, she relived every moment of Zach's kiss.

To say she had been caught off guard could not express how she really felt. And the fact that she had never been kissed before . . .

She collapsed into the bed and stared up at the ceiling. It was just dark enough that the glow-in-the-dark stars there were starting to show. She tried to concentrate on them, but all she could think about was Zach.

What was she doing? He was
Englisch.
A kiss from him was not as special as from an Amish boy. Oh, it felt special. It made her stomach flutter and her knees shake. She wanted it to never end.

But she had to keep things in perspective. Zach was handsome and worldly. He probably went along kissing girls willy-nilly. She wasn't fooling herself. She couldn't compare to the
Englisch
girls with all their sophistication and knowledge about such things. She had to protect her heart before she lost it completely.

She rolled to one side, thinking about how he cradled her against him. Longing and guilt swamped her at the same time. Was this where she belonged? Was she destined to go home to Wells Landing? Could she live without the closeness of her siblings? Could she survive in the
Englisch
world? Could she walk away from Zach and his brilliant smile?

The stars grew clearer as she shifted once again, her focus changing from Zach to the ceiling above her. Something tangible, solid. Daniel would love to have something like the stars on his ceiling. If
Mamm
would allow it. Lorie didn't know how Maddie would react to such a decoration, but if she had to guess she'd say that her stepmother would allow it for Daniel.

Tears stung her eyes. Daniel would be in bed now, sleeping and waiting for the new day to start. She wondered what Maddie told him about where she was and why she hadn't come home. Daniel was simple in his mind. He would believe anything
Mamm
told him. Lorie only hoped that Maddie's anger and disappointment hadn't gotten the better of her and poisoned whatever she said to the young boy. Lorie couldn't bear to go back and have Daniel hate her.

But was she going back? Once again her thoughts had gone in a complete circle. No closer to an answer than she was before, Lorie thought to pray. She wanted to, but she had left her
kapp
in the car. She gathered the small blanket from the bottom of the bed and draped it over her head. It wasn't quite the same, but she hoped God would understand. She closed her eyes and started to pray.

“Have you decided what you want to do about your family?” Zach asked.

They were sitting at lunch the next day, eating with the seniors as had become their custom. Lorie had helped them finish their paintings. They had left them in the rec room to dry. As they headed off to the cafeteria, one of the other workers had asked her about the painting. Lorie was thrilled to be consulted about the artwork and gladly told the employee what they had done.

Now all of table eight was gathered around, but there was no leprechaun pudding in sight.

“My mom's family?” she asked, not quite understanding. Maybe because she'd had such a tough night trying to figure out where to go from here.

“Yeah.”

Lorie shrugged. “I came this far. It seems useless if I don't continue on. Don't you think?”

“I say that's completely up to you.”

Lorie had spent what seemed like hours with the blanket on her head praying for wisdom and more. She needed guidance. She trusted God. She knew He wouldn't lead her astray. But she wanted answers now. The one time she needed her father the most, he wasn't there.

“Again, up to you.” Zach studied her face and suddenly Lorie was reliving that kiss all over again. Heat rose into her cheeks. Was he thinking the same thing? “This sacrifice has been yours. You make of it what you will. No one here will judge you.”

She looked around at the seniors all sitting at the lunch table. They had come to mean so much to her. No. They wouldn't judge her. But the good Amish people of Wells Landing would weigh in on the merits of chasing down her mother's wealthy family.

“I want to go see them, but I don't know how I will get there.”

“I'll take you. We can go down and get a hotel. Then drive back the next day.”

“In the orange car?”

He shook his head. “We'll borrow my mom's car. It's more reliable.”

“That's asking a lot.”

Zach's eyes turned suddenly serious. “I promised I would help you find your mother's family, and I will. Even if it means driving to Dallas.”

Betty leaned close to Lorie and whispered, “That sounds like love to me.”

But Lorie wasn't sure if she was clearheaded or being typical Betty.

“Hush,” Stan said. “If a man wants to take her to Dallas, then he should. And women shouldn't be reading too much into it. That's the problem with girls today.”

“Like you know what girls are like today. How long has it been since you had a date?” Linda said.

“It's been since you had one.”

Betty blushed.

“What are you arguing about?” Fern asked.

“Women,” Eugene joined in. “We're
discussing
women.”

“Now why does that sound derogatory?” Linda asked. “Oh, because you said it.”

Zach caught Lorie's attention and smiled.

She returned it, then ducked her head, the kiss coming back once again.

“Well, I think a man should be able to take a woman to Dallas for an overnight trip without everyone making too big a deal of it,” Stan said.

“Here, here,” Eugene added.

“After all, it's the twenty-first century. Why can't two people go out of town together without everyone thinking that there's more going on?”

“Are you saying that a guy could take a girl out of town and not expect anything more from her?” Linda asked, eyes wide.

Stan nudged Zach in the ribs. “What is it with women these days? Do all the girls think boys only want . . .” He raised his eyebrows suggestively.

Zach shrugged, but his cheeks seemed a tad bit pinker.

“Lorie?”

She jerked to attention as Fern spoke her name. “Huh?”

“What do you think boys have on their minds these days?”

“I couldn't begin to guess.” Her own cheeks filled with heat.

“So you're saying that Zach should be able to take Lorie to Dallas to find her mother's family, and she won't have to worry about him thinking too much about the trip,” Linda asked.

“That's exactly what I'm saying,” Stan said with a nod.

“Lorie, dear,” Betty started. “I think you should go.”

A chorus of “me toos” went up around their table.

“It's all settled then,” Eugene said. “Zach and Lorie are going to Dallas.”

The seniors from table eight smiled in approval.

Lorie looked to Zach. He was smiling to himself and shaking his head. That's when she knew: they had been set up, though neither of them had seen it coming.

 

 

Spending four hours in the car with Zach should have made her at least a little uncomfortable, but Lorie was relaxed and happy as they drove along. Well, she was nervous and anxious about seeing her mother's family. Zach had worked whatever magic he had over the Internet and found a phone number. The Prescotts had been surprised to hear from her, but welcomed her visit with more enthusiasm than she had ever expected.

Despite all her crazy feelings, she was happy, content even, to be by Zach's side riding along.

Dallas traffic was unlike anything Lorie had ever seen. It looked as if billions of people were driving their cars as fast as they could, trying to get someplace before it was too late. She wanted to close her eyes, but it made her dizzy so she opened them again.

“All the road construction has put us behind. I think we should call the hotel and tell them we'll be late checking in. Then we can grab something to eat and get ready to meet your family tomorrow. Sound good?”

“Good enough for me.”

He gave her instructions on how to look up the number for the hotel on his cell phone and had her dial. She hung up the phone looking at it with awe. “I have got to get me one of these.”

Zach chuckled. “We'll do that next.”

 

 

Lorie hardly slept a wink that night. Aside from knowing that Zach was sleeping so close, on the other side of the wall of their adjoining rooms, she tossed and turned worrying over what was to come. Yes, her mother's family had agreed to have her come and visit, but it didn't mean anything beyond that. What if they didn't like her? Or thought she was weird because she had been raised differently? This was the grandmother who threatened to take her from her father. Had she made a mistake in coming here?

“Wow, you look . . . tired,” Zach said over breakfast the next morning.

She shot him a look and reached for the coffee.

They ate in silence, then checked out of the hotel.

Zach was quiet as he drove the busy Dallas streets. He'd even turned off the radio. It was as if he knew she needed silence to prepare herself for what was to come.

Soon they were pulling through a neighborhood with houses bigger than she had ever seen.

“One family lives there?” she asked, pointing to a large brick structure with three stories and a porch that looked bigger than their barn.

Zach nodded. “Awesome, huh?”

She turned toward him. “It's . . . excessive. Wasteful.”

He cleared his throat. “I guess I never thought about it that way. Most people dream of living in a house like these.”

“What about you?” She hadn't meant for her question to sound so stern or judgmental, but there it was. “I'm sorry. It's just . . . is that why you want to have a better job than the one you have at the living center? A house like that?”

“Well,” he started, then stuttered a bit as he continued, “it doesn't have to be that big. But I want my own house and—”

“What good is a house that big? Especially if there are only a couple of people living in it.”

“I guess I never thought about it. What's that house number up there?”

“Four sixty-eight,” she replied, though she suspected he had purposely changed the subject. She would allow him this. She hadn't meant to criticize him and his goals for his life. They were his own. And if he wanted to work at a job he might not like in order to get an overlarge house, who was she to say otherwise?

“Then it should be that one up there.” He pointed up the street.

She might be mistaken, but the sandstone and brick structure looked to be the largest house on the street. Was her mother's family really that wealthy?

The house looked even bigger in person than it did in the pictures Zach had shown her on his computer.

Zach drove his mother's car toward the closed gate and pressed a button of some sort.

“Yes?” a cultured voice drawled.

“My name is Zach Calhoun. I'm here with Lorie Kauffman. Uh, Mathis.”

“Come right in.” A buzz sounded and the gate slid open without a sound.

“Are you ready for this?” he asked.

“No.” Her voice trembled.

“We can still turn around and leave if you want to.”

Lorie swallowed hard.

“Sir?” The same voice that greeted them from the box on the side of the gate spoke again. “It's safe to drive in now.”

Still Zach waited for her response.

“We're already here. Might as well,” she finally said.

“Let's do this.” He nodded, then put the car in gear.

Minutes later he pulled the car onto a circular drive, which curved around a fountain that rivaled the ones she had seen at the park in Tulsa.

He had barely shut off the engine when the front door opened and a woman in a plain gray dress stood in the doorway waiting for them.

“Right this way,” she said, leading them down a marble-floored hallway.

She opened a door halfway down and stepped aside so they could enter. “Mrs. Prescott, Lorie Mathis and Zach . . .”