Letting Go (17 page)

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Authors: Erosa Knowles

Tags: #parenting lbgt teen, #inter racial romance, #politician romance, #bwwm fiction, #bwwm marriage, #politicians fiction

BOOK: Letting Go
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“No man, no, it didn’t happen like that.”

“What the fuck?” one of the guys at the party said, moving in front of Kip. “It shouldn’t have happened at all you sick son of a bitch.” He picked Kip up and threw him in the pool.

“You need to leave man,” someone said from behind him. “I’ve got to call an ambulance for the pervert and you don’t need to be here for that.”

“Let the bitch drown,” someone said.

“Not at my house,” the voice behind him snapped.

Grant stopped listening. He turned, the crowd parted and he walked through unbothered by the looks of pity on their faces. Now that the anger simmered, the scrapes and punches Kip had thrown throbbed. He got in his car and headed home.

As soon as he entered the house he called out for Blair and closed the kitchen door. He would apologize for not protecting him from Priscilla and Kip. He wiped his hand over his face and shook his head.

His ex-wife was a mistake from the beginning. He never should’ve listened to his father. But just as Blair wanted his acceptance, Grant had wanted to see the light of acceptance in his father’s eyes, and married his dad’s former mistress. He didn’t know at the time, and during football season, between practice and travel, he had missed the signs. He shook his head at his gullibility.

“BJ,” he called again, heading toward the family room where they’d been talking an hour ago. Although the TV blared, the room was empty. He headed toward Blair’s bedroom and opened the door. His son’s body lay crumpled on the floor. Grant’s empty pain pill bottle lay next to Blair’s hand.

In that instant, Grant’s world darkened. His heart slammed into his chest as he staggered at the sight. Preacher’s words thrummed through him… the first time…

He ran inside, grabbed his son and screamed. “No!”

Chapter 16

 

Numb, Grant sat in the waiting area wondering if his parents had felt this god-awful nothingness while they'd waited to hear from the doctors the night he’d almost died. His insides twisted and it hurt to breathe. Karma was indeed a bitch. The door opened, he looked up and hitched a breath in relief.

“Grant,” Kelly said, moving to his side and holding him close. He laid his head on her shoulder and exhaled. He didn’t know who else to call, she’d been his first thought. He saw the shocked expression on Robin’s face as he watched them and knew he owed him an apology. One of many, it seemed.

“How’s he doing?” she whispered as she stroked his hair. Robin watched from a distance but didn’t approach.

“I don’t know yet. They took him in the back and sent me in here.”

She nodded and lapsed into silence.

“You could’ve listened to him,” Robin said in a sullen manner. “He just wanted you to listen, why couldn’t you do that?”

“Robin,” Kelly said in a stern tone.

Grant sat straight. Robin’s anger radiated off him. But Grant didn’t have the energy for any more emotional gymnastics tonight. “You’re right, I should’ve listened. I was wrong about a lot of things. I’m sorry.”

Robin stared at him a moment longer, turned and walked to the other side of the room.

Kelly stared into his eyes and he knew things were good between them. He still needed to apologize, sort a few things out with his dad, but no matter what, this woman would be by his side.


It’s going to be okay. You’ll work through all of this.” She touched his bruised lip. “Busy night?”

He closed his eyes and rested his forehead on hers. “Yeah.” In short sentences he told her what happened. He sensed her outrage and a sense of calm flowed over him. He hadn’t over-reacted with Kip, she would’ve done the same.

“Is he going to press charges?”

He shrugged. It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered right now other than Blair recovering and her holding him tight.

“Your parents? Have you contacted them?”

“No. I don’t want them here. They’re poison. Well, not my mom, but I don’t want her here either.”

She nodded. “I’m going to get you something to drink and check on Robin. He and BJ talked earlier tonight. He’s blaming himself for some of this.”

“I don’t want anything to drink, go talk to Robin. I’m glad you’re here, it means a lot that you came.”

She smiled and touched his cheek with her fingertip. “I’m not leaving.”

“I know and that’s the best news I’ve heard all day. Sorry about the meeting earlier. I had a lot on my mind. This is …it’s a lot. But I’m clear on a few things, crystal. That’s half of the battle.”

She nodded and walked toward Robin. He watched as she put her hand on her son’s shoulder and they talked. He blinked fast when she pulled her son into her arms and held him as close as she’d held him a few moments ago. Robin’s loud sobs filled the room and tugged on his heart. How could he have thought this young man didn’t care for his son? Or that what the two shared wasn’t valid? He wiped the moisture from his eyes and turned to give them privacy. The door opened and a man, who looked too young to be a doctor, entered the room.

“Mr. Whittaker?”

Grant stood. “Yes? How is he?”

“He’s resting. He consumed a large dose of prescription drugs which caused him to pass out. You got him here before there was much damage. But he’ll remain for a day or two to be sure everything’s stable.” He cleared his throat. “I’ve admitted him pending a mental health evaluation.”

“What? Why?”

“Hospital policy for these type cases requires a seventy-two hours evaluation. During that time a psychiatrist will talk with Blair to determine if he’s a threat to himself or others.”

Grant shook his head. “No, no, you don’t understand. He was upset with me –”

“And he took a high dose of pain pills by accident?”

The censure in the doctor’s voice stumped him. Up until this point he hadn’t wanted to consider the possibility of his son attempting to take his life. He didn’t know what to say, what to do.

“I…I don’t.” He looked around for Kelly. She moved quickly to his side.

“Doctor, what Grant wants to know is when will he be able to speak with Blair? He needs to see him for himself.”

“I understand. They are moving him now to a room. One of the nurses will let you know when he’s settled.”

Grant grabbed her hand and squeezed his thanks. The doctor left the room and Grant returned to his seat, hoping Kelly would sit with him, hold him and tell him everything would be fine. He acknowledged his selfishness when he saw Robin sitting in the back with his head bowed, but it didn’t change what he wanted.

She sat next to him and he released a deep breath. “It won’t take long; you’ll be able to see him soon. Do you want me to contact Matt?”

He frowned. “Matt?”

“Yes, from last night group. He’s the leader and typically when something like this happens we all come together for support. He could come alone or invite some of the others, it’s your call.”

The idea of seeing Preacher or Matt sent chills down his back. “No. I’m not ready for that. Just you. I only want you.” He exhaled and prayed Blair would be fine, that his son would forgive him.

She squeezed his arm. “Okay. I just needed to ask.”

The next twenty minutes they sat in an uneasy silence with their thoughts. Kelly alternated sitting with him and then with Robin.

A nurse opened the door, gave them the room number and told them how to find Blair’s room. Grant turned and extended his hand to Kelly. She grabbed Robin’s hand and together they walked to Grant. He took her hand, squeezed his thanks and left the waiting room.

 

Chapter 17

 

Kelly walked hand-in-hand between Grant and Robin down the hall ignoring the looks and stares sent in their direction. Neither male would release her hand. Both were afraid of what they would see when they entered Blair’s room. Grant shook and it unnerved her to feel the tremors in his arm.

When Grant had called earlier, she'd dreaded waking Robin to tell him what happened. Despite the sorrow she felt for Grant, she’d breathed in relief it hadn’t been her son in the emergency room. Robin broke down and told her he and BJ had argued over college, broken promises and other things. Blair told him what was going on at home with Grant. Frustrated by Blair’s on and off signals, Robin had broken things off with Blair telling him to grow a pair. Now he blamed himself as much as Grant.

They stood in front of the closed door and she tried to disentangle her hand from Grant. He held tighter.

“Please.”

She heard his soft whisper and relented. “Open the door then. I want to see him.”

He nodded but didn’t move. She withheld a sigh and looked at Robin. He stared at her for a moment, and then opened the door and walked inside.

She and Grant followed and stood just inside the door. Had she not held Grant’s hand, she wouldn’t have known how the visual of Blair lying on the bed with tubes connected to his body affected him. He stood upright like a plank of wood. Fierce tremors ran through his body; she feared he’d collapse.

“Grant?” She rubbed his arm. He continued staring straight ahead at his son.

“Grant?” She called his name again, concerned as tears ran unchecked down his face. Would she need to call a nurse for him?

He gasped, took in a large gulp of air, and closed his eyes. “I did this,” he whispered. “He pretended everything was okay so I’d be okay.” He shook his head and opened his eyes. She flinched at his tortured gaze. “I keep messing up.”

She swallowed hard at his ragged statement. “But you can fix this. You can change directions, make corrections. It’s up to you, no one but you.”

He stared at her a few seconds longer and nodded. “You’ve always been good for me. I’m so glad you’re here. We’re going to talk once I get a few things sorted. I want you in my life, Doctor.”

She smiled and nodded. “Go see your son, I’ll be here.” He released her hand and walked toward the bed. She opened and closed her palm to get the circulation moving again before glancing at her watch. In three hours she had a staff meeting with her summer office staff. She needed to rearrange her schedule for the next few days. Robin would want to be here with Blair, if the teen allowed it. She wanted to be available for Grant to talk to her, or just have someone so he wouldn’t be alone.

What would Grant do about his campaign? Chances were pretty good the press would get a whiff of this, and if they didn’t, his challenger would make sure it was leaked somehow. She glanced at him. Had he really changed? Could he accept his son with the same love his son accepted him? She hoped so. Otherwise she couldn’t see a future with Grant and she wanted the man in her life.

Grant stared at the pale, drawn face of his son and exhaled. “I’m so sorry, Blair. So sorry,” he whispered.

Blair frowned and then opened his eyes slowly. “Dad?”

“Yeah, son?” His heartbeat leapt into second gear hearing Blair’s voice.

“What happened to your face?”

Grant had forgotten his fight with Kip, it was old news. “I kicked Kip’s ass.”

Blair’s eyes widened and then he smiled. “You did?”

“Hell yeah.” He glanced at Robin, unsure if Blair had shared that bit of history with him. “He looks much worse.”

“I’m sure he does.” Blair looked at Robin, smiled, and raised one finger. Robin hooked it with a finger of his own.

“What happened, Blair? You took my pain pills, why?” Grant asked, refusing to avoid the issue.

Blair licked his lips. Robin grabbed the cup on the small table and put a piece of ice against his lips. Blair sucked the ice into his mouth and looked up at Robin. “Thanks.”

Robin nodded and replaced the cup.

Blair’s brow furrowed. “The doctor asked me the same thing. I was scared you’d leave like mom had. It hurt. I don’t think I ever felt that kind of pain.”

Grant winced. Now he wished he’d stopped and explained what ran through his mind at the time. It would have taken a second and all of this could’ve been avoided.

“I didn’t mean to take so many pills. I took a couple, but they didn’t work fast enough, so I took a few more. Honest, I wasn’t trying to kill myself, I… I just wanted the pain to stop. I wouldn’t do that, try to kill myself.”

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