Just a Kiss: The Bradfords, Book 5 (33 page)

Kevin settled down next to her again and kissed the top of her head. “I’m sure you’re right.”

When he went looking for her after lunch, he wasn’t surprised to find her in the common room holding a Bible in the air and calling across the room to Anthony, “Shoes! I knew it!”

Chapter Eleven

“I screwed up.”

Pastor Bryan looked up from his desk. “Happens to the best of us.”

As usual, Eve dropped into the chair across from him. She was supposed to be going to the restaurant for pork chops and potatoes for her and Kevin’s dinner, but she’d decided she needed this pit stop on the way.

“He’s the real deal, Reverend,” she said, crossing her legs. “He walks the walk. Not just talking. In fact, he doesn’t do that much talking about it. But he shows everyone. You know that verse about living a life that makes people wonder about your joy? He does that. People want to talk to him about all of this.” She waved her hand to encompass Bryan’s office and all that surrounded it. “And he’s able to get his message across that way. He lives it. He shows them how they should act instead of telling them, preaching and everything. No offense.”

“None taken.” Bryan put his pen down and leaned forward. “I assume we’re talking about Kevin?”

Eve covered her face with her hands. “Yes,” she groaned.

“And this is a problem because…?” Bryan prompted.

She dropped her hands and met Bryan’s gaze. “I have to tell him I haven’t been going to church.”

“You mean be totally honest with him? Gee, I think that’s a great idea. I can’t believe I didn’t think of it before.”

“Har, har.” Eve pushed herself up from the chair and paced to his bookcase. “I didn’t know if he really meant it. I know he said he was going to church and that it was important to him. But I didn’t know if he was doing it…” She sighed. “Church means different things to different people. He used to go, you know. In high school. But it was to get me to date him. So I wasn’t
sure
that he was there for all the right reasons.”

“And now?”

“He means it,” she said softly.

“So you’re going to tell him what’s been going on with you?”

She nodded. She wanted to tell Kevin everything. “Do you know that he hasn’t even asked about the arrest?”

“What arrest?”

“My arrest.”

“You were arrested?”

He said it innocently, but Eve rolled her eyes. “I know Monica told you about it. She asked if she could and I said yes. I thought it would help you understand me better.” If nothing else it gave him another good reason to pray for her.

He visibly relaxed. “And Kevin knows about it?”

She smiled in spite of feeling like her heart was going to pound out of her chest every time she thought about telling Kevin the details. She was sure the story would lead into a full confession of her other sins and mistakes.

“Yeah, I spilled it in a moment of frustration. And then he didn’t ask for details. He didn’t need to know more, he said. He said it wouldn’t change his feelings.”

Bryan looked up at her, his eyebrows up. “He isn’t even
curious
?”

“He’s not pushing.”

Bryan must have read the worry on her face because he said, “You were found not guilty, Eve. And it was embezzlement, not murder or something.”

“Thou shalt not steal,” she reminded him. “It’s still one of the top ten.”

“But you didn’t do it,” Bryan replied.

No, she hadn’t. She’d associated with—
lived
with—someone who did, but she hadn’t been a part of it.

“How do I tell him about everything? Especially the church stuff?”

“You already know this,” Bryan said. “Tell him the truth. Tell him that you’ve had a lot of questions and confusion about what you believe…”

She frowned. “I haven’t had any questions or confusion. I know exactly what I’ve been feeling and why.”

Bryan took a deep breath and tried again. “Sorry, okay. I understand that your dad disappointed you, let you down.”

“And I have some issues with imperfect human beings coming to church, listening to other imperfect human beings tell them how to live, then feeling like they’ve done something good because they sat in a pew for an hour.”

Bryan winced. “I know.”

“So is that what I should tell Kevin?”

“If that’s how you really feel, yes.” Bryan gave her a serious look. “But you have to be prepared for the idea that he might not like what you’re saying. He might not understand it. For some people, church is an anchor, a place where they go to feel reenergized, where they reconnect with God and their faith.”

She shifted on her seat, feeling restless, her heart pounding again. That was exactly what church was for Kevin. It was where he’d found the foundation he’d needed. “But if he loves me, he’ll try to understand, right?”

Bryan didn’t reply right away. “Faith questions can be complicated,” he finally said. “And remember, you’re going to be surprising him with this. Don’t…expect miracles.”

She stared at him. “No miracles? Isn’t it in the minister’s handbook to believe in miracles?”

He gave her a little smile. “I look upward for those mostly.”

She frowned. She’d really like to think a miracle was possible here. “Aren’t you supposed to be uplifting and optimistic?”

“I’m supposed to be honest.”

She slumped into the chair. This could still go badly. She got that. But she’d been hoping for a pep talk. Or something.

“But,” he said, “I can honestly say that true love can do amazing things. I know that finding that person who loves you no matter what is a gift. I know that love can transcend all of our mistakes and shortcomings.”

They sat looking at each other for a moment, both feeling…
something.
Finally she let out the breath she’d been holding. “See, I was right there with you. Then you use words like ‘transcend’ and you start sounding all preacherly and you lose me.”

She stood and grabbed her purse trying to make light when in reality he’d given her exactly what she needed—hope.

Bryan nodded with a knowing smile. “Note to self—use smaller words with Eve.”

She grinned, then started for the door. “Wish me luck.”

“I’ll do you one better,” he said, “I’ll pray for you.”

She turned back, prepared to flippantly tell him not to forget world peace while he was at it. But something stopped her. Instead she took in the cozy office, the cross on the wall, the rows and rows of books written by people trying to help other people. Finally she looked at Bryan. He was smiling at her, sincerity, acceptance and friendship apparent in his eyes.

“Thanks.”

She hoped he knew that one word covered the prayer—and everything else.

“Hey, helping you out is a sure way to get my halo shining nice and bright,” he said with a grin.

She grinned back. Yeah, he knew.

“Kevin?” Eve called, letting herself in the front door. She’d talked to Lacey and Libby and they’d said it was no problem for Drew to stay a little longer.

She didn’t know how long soul-baring generally took, but she guessed more than the twenty minutes they had left before the girls were originally supposed to bring Drew home.

“Kevin?”

He came out of the kitchen, his cell phone pressed to his ear. “No, I understand,” he said. He held up a finger, asking her to wait.

She propped her shoulder against the doorway to watch him. His faded blue jeans had obviously been worn enough that they were soft and fit his ass perfectly. He wore a simple black T-shirt but it hugged his chest and shoulders outlining his shape and strength, making her shiver remembering how easily he could lift and move her and how big he was—all over. Then he raked his fingers through his hair and the shirt pulled up from the waistband of his jeans, revealing a strip of skin dusted with dark hair and she wanted to push it up further and further, licking every inch of the skin she exposed as she went.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

She straightened as he disconnected. She couldn’t lick anything right now. They needed to talk. And it sounded like he might be leaving.

“I have to go back to Omaha,” he said, crossing the foyer.

“Oh.” No talking or licking. “I was hoping… Do you have to leave right away? We need to talk.”

“I know.”

He shoved his fingers through his hair again, but instead of focusing on his abs—though it was difficult—she noticed the strain on his face.

Maybe this wasn’t the time to add more strain. Then again, maybe telling him everything would give him some relief. Her arrest wasn’t great, but, as Bryan said, she hadn’t murdered anyone. She’d
wanted
to after it all went down, but she hadn’t. She took a deep breath. “I want to tell you about the arrest.” And some other, even bigger, things.

His gaze flew to her face, his eyes widened and his hand dropped from his head. “I… I want to…” He looked down at the phone in his hand. “Damn. I have to go. Ryan’s in trouble.”

“Ryan?” Eve said. “The kid from the Center?”

“Yeah.” Kevin looked downright pissed off. “He got into a fight on his way home. The cops took him in. They’ll let him go, but only if I’m the one to come get him.”

Eve frowned. “The kid you talked to about
not
fighting a few hours ago?”

He sighed. “That’s the one.”

“You’re going to help him?” she asked, her frown deepening. “After he did exactly what you told him not to do?”

“Yeah.” Kevin lifted a shoulder.

What had the kid been thinking? This amazing man was giving him time and attention, genuinely cared about him and had been praising him. How had Ryan turned around and forgotten all of that within the hour? “Aren’t you mad?” she asked.

It was clear he was. “Of course.”

“Aren’t you disappointed?”

“Yes.”

“But you’re going anyway?”

Kevin was watching her closely. “Yes. I’m going anyway. I told him that if he ever needed anything he only had to call.”

He meant it. She could see it in his eyes. He was angry, but he was going to be there for Ryan anyway. “Wow.” He really did walk the walk.

And she suddenly smiled brightly. So brightly that Kevin blinked in surprise.

“My stuff can wait. I’ll tell you all about it when you get back.” She felt almost giddy. Kevin knew what it meant to care unconditionally. He knew how to forgive. She could tell him anything and he’d still love her. “You should go get Ryan.”

“You okay?” he asked, reaching for her.

She went to him, wrapping her arms around him and holding tight. “Absolutely. We’ll talk when you get back.”

He hugged her for a long moment, then let her go. He searched her face for a moment. “I meant it when I said I don’t need to know.”

“I need to tell you.” She meant what she said too. She wanted him to know everything. The arrest was actually small potatoes. But she had to trust that his feelings for her were bigger than everything else.

He leaned in, cupped her cheek and kissed her sweetly. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

As the door closed behind him, Eve took a deep breath. She couldn’t deny she was a little nervous and didn’t mind the reprieve. She’d once trusted that her father’s feelings for her were bigger than everything else too. But comparing Reverend Donnelly and Kevin Campbell now, she could see that her father had always been more comfortable with a pulpit between him and the people he talked to. Of course, people sought out his council outside of Sunday service, but he’d given them Bible verses and clichéd statements about reflecting and praying and turning it all over to God.

Not that those were the wrong things to say. But he’d never really given any honest, heartfelt words that were all his. Not even to his daughter.

She felt guilty thinking those thoughts of her father and wondered if she was coloring the past this way because of her hurt. Possibly. But she really would like to remember some sincere comforting words from Reverend Donnelly. Maybe they’d happened behind closed doors. She was going to try to focus on that.

Then there was Kevin. He gave people
Calvin and Hobbes
, if that’s what they needed. He answered his phone at two a.m. He was steady and there when someone needed him and lived a life that demonstrated things that were very hard to even put into words.

She felt tears sting, but her smile grew. He was definitely the real deal.

Feeling lighter than she had in a long time, Eve took the bag of food from Sherry’s and stored it in the fridge for tomorrow. Then she swung through the drive-through on the highway and headed to Lacey and Libby’s with burgers and fries.

“Eve!”

As Libby led her into the kitchen, she was surprised to find Drew making a bee-line for her with a huge grin.

“Hi, D,” she greeted. She was equally surprised to find that she’d missed him. “How was your day?”

“Good. Except for the cleaning part.”

She handed him the food bags and followed him to the table. “But you survived,” she pointed out with a smile, “and the place looks great.” It did. The kitchen was spotless and smelled great.