Just a Kiss: The Bradfords, Book 5 (28 page)

Kevin opened his eyes and looked at Sam. “And the arrest shouldn’t make me
more
concerned?”

He lifted a shoulder. “You don’t know anything about it.”

That wasn’t true. “She was arrested as an accessory to a felony.”

Mac frowned at him. “Well, that’s…something.”

“Yeah, but…”

“What. Did. She.
Do
?” Sam asked.

“She was
arrested.
And she’s helping me with Drew,” Kevin said.

“It’s not like she was arrested yesterday while Drew was driving the get-away car,” Dooley said.

“I know but—”

“I have an arrest record,” Mac said, stretching his arms out along the back of the couch. Mac was a big guy and sitting like that he seemed to be challenging Kevin to question his good influence.

“I have an arrest record too,” Dooley said. “So does Ben.”

“You’d let any of us hang out with Drew, wouldn’t you?” Sam asked.

He would. Of course he would. These men were some of the best people he knew. They would protect what was important to Kevin simply because it was important to Kevin.

So would Eve.

He wasn’t questioning her loyalty. He was mad…at himself. He hadn’t asked any questions. He’d assumed because he so wanted her to be the same girl he’d always loved, that there was nothing to talk about or be concerned with. And now Drew might be at risk.

“Yes.”

“So, the arrest doesn’t automatically mean that she’s bad for Drew,” Dooley said. “Why are your panties in such a wad?”

“I know about your arrest records.” Hell, he’d bailed two of them out himself.

“You’re mad she didn’t tell you?” Mac asked.

“Maybe a little.”

“That’s not why you’re mad,” Dooley said.

No, it wasn’t. Hell, he couldn’t even be
mad
at her right.

Kevin sighed. “Then why am I mad?”

“Because she’s not the sweet, innocent, perfect little preacher’s daughter she used to be.”

Yep, that was absolutely it. And he was way more stressed than he was mad.

The clock on the wall in the break room ticked thirty times. Finally Kevin said, “She’s changed.”

“People tend to do that over the course of fourteen years,” Mac said.

Kevin sighed. “I’m trying to bare my soul here.”

Mac grinned. “I don’t expect this will take long. Your soul’s been pretty clean for quite awhile.”

He loved these guys. He really did. He couldn’t remember why at the moment, but he was sure he did.

“What you’re saying is that now you know Eve isn’t perfect, she’s not as attractive to you,” Sam said with a nod. “She’s tainted.”

Kevin scowled at his friend. “She’s not tainted. Don’t be an idiot.”

“So, what’s the problem here?” Sam asked.

“She’s…changed.”

“So have you.”

“Yeah, for the better.”

Three wide-eyed stares met his.

“Wow,” Sam said.

“Really cold,” Mac said with some wonder.

Kevin puffed out a breath. “I know. I sound like a dick. But I’m…scared.” There’s he’d admitted it.

“Scared?” Dooley said. “Of little Eve?”

Yes, definitely. Of the changes in her. Of the idea that maybe he wasn’t the right guy for her now. Or she wasn’t the right girl for him. Of the idea that maybe nothing in life was absolute and steadfast.

Her
father had turned out not to be.
His
father had turned out not to be. His relationship with Eve, his football career, even his body—the thing that he’d always depended on to make him popular and noteworthy and to make his dad proud—had ended up being unstable.

If Eve Donnelly couldn’t be counted on, nothing could.

He shrugged. “She’s changed,” he said again, not able to explain it better than that.

“Lots of things have changed,” Dooley pointed out.

“Yes. Exactly.” Kevin leaned forward with his elbows on his knees and dropped his head, staring at the floor. “You guys have all changed. Your girls are awesome, but things are different. Things with my parents have changed. I have Drew. Eve is back in my life. I…I want something to be the way I’m used to, the way it’s always been. I’d hoped that might be
her.
”

“You’ve changed too, buddy,” Sam said, his voice gentler now. “You’ve changed more than any of us, probably.”

“I know. And that shook my life most of all,” he said. It was true. He’d changed. But it hadn’t been easy and there were lots of times that he found himself tempted to go back to how things used to be.

Having a beer with the guys was easier than always ordering soda and water. Letting a “fuck” or a “son of a bitch” fly was easier than tamping down the urge—as the last few days had proven. Doing whatever he wanted to do was far easier than examining his intentions and the consequences of every decision. Flirting—and more—with women was
far
easier than resisting the temptation.

“So you were hoping Eve would be predictable and steady?” Dooley said.

“Right.” And it was more than knowing what he could expect from and with her. It was also about her choices. She’d always known who she was, what she believed, what was important.

That stuff wasn’t supposed to change.

Now, he wondered—she was obviously more sexually experienced, she had gotten into some trouble with the cops—what else was different? What other choices had she made?

“I’m scared to find out what else might have changed.”

No one answered him for a moment—not even sarcastically.

“You know, Kev,” Dooley finally said, “it’s possible that you’re scaring her too.”

He looked at his friend with surprise. “What do you mean?”

“You’re really different too and maybe she’s worried, especially with her changes, that it’s too much.”

Kevin felt his stomach churn with trepidation. “You think?”

Dooley wasn’t looking at him as he lifted his shoulder. “It’s been an adjustment for us. Even if the changes are good, it takes getting used to. Does she really know all the ways you’re different?”

The trepidation turned to anxiety. Eve knew he was a Christian now but had she seen any of that in action? In Grover they were in kind of a bubble. That wasn’t his real life, his real routine. “It’s been an adjustment for you?” he asked, looking at each of the guys.

He knew it had been. Of course. But had it been
bad
? He still saw them, still hung out. He just didn’t win any drinking contests or yell obscenities during football games on TV. At least, not as much as he used to.

“It’s been…different,” Dooley was the one to admit.

“How?”

“We watch what we say around you more,” Dooley said. “We don’t tell you all the stories we used to tell you.”

“You don’t?” He stared at Dooley, then looked at Sam and Mac. “Seriously?” He’d heard plenty of stories. If they’d been holding back, he could only imagine what they
hadn’t
shared.

Mac shrugged. “It’s been for your own good.”

Shit, they’d been protecting
him
. “You can tell me anything,” he said. “I won’t think less of you.”

“And what about Eve?” Sam asked. “Can she tell you anything?”

Kevin opened his mouth to reply but then realized he couldn’t answer that quickly. He accepted his friends. He loved them. But, they hadn’t changed on him. Mac, Dooley and Sam were essentially the same guys they’d always been. They were more mellow, happier, less self-absorbed because of their wives and almost-wife. But it was more their lives that had changed versus the people they were. They had anniversaries and monogamy now, but they were still there for him, they still gave him opinions whether he wanted them or not and they still had his back whether it was on a call for work or when he was feeling his way through a new relationship.

Loving them, depending on them, trusting them wasn’t hard.

Could he love and trust Eve even if she
wasn’t
the same person deep down?

Was he capable of loving
anyone
through major changes in their lives?

He thought of his father and the disappointment of learning that his son’s football career had been so important to him, then the disappointment of finding out about his infidelity. His feelings for his dad were shaky at the moment for sure. And his mom—she’d made Kevin’s dad choose between her and his ten-year-old son. Could he forgive her for that? Get past it? Love her in the same way?

Kevin squeezed his eyes shut.

It was quite possible that all of this was very much
his
problem.

“I want her to be able to tell me anything,” he finally answered honestly.

“But you’re not sure,” Dooley said.

“I guess not.”

“Then you need to find out. Find out what changes there are and see how you feel about them.”

“And keep in mind, you said we’re all different. And I have to say that I think in every case we’re better,” Sam said.

Mac nodded. “Absolutely.”

Dooley propped his feet up on the table. “Yep, change can be good.”

But it was
change
. “I guess.”

“For instance,” Sam said, “sounds like you would have never taken the old Eve to Tease. What about the new Eve?”

“She’s probably already been there,” he muttered.

Sam laughed. “See, change isn’t all bad.”

“How about elevator sex?” Dooley asked. “Never with the old Eve, right?”

Definitely not. But the new Eve… Kevin’s thoughts went immediately to how she’d touched herself on the couch. Elevators might be a possibility.

“What about being yourself?” Mac asked.

Kevin was surprised to find the topic off of sex already. “What do you mean?”

“Sounds like the old Eve was damned near perfect. And sweet. It’s hard to be yourself with someone who’s perfect.” He glanced at Sam. “I should know. When you have a girl up on a pedestal, it’s hard to realize she’s real. And it’s hard to be real yourself.”

Kevin thought about that. He’d always been trying to be
good
with Eve. He’d worked on being who he wanted to be instead of who he really was.

Damn, Mac had something there. “So…” he prompted, hoping for more insight.

“So, now that she’s not quite perfect, it’ll be easier to be your not-quite-perfect self. It’ll be more real. And trust me, real is better. Finding someone you can be yourself with is the best thing there is.”

Kevin thought about that. He wanted to get home and be real with Eve right then and there.

“Okay, since Mac is showing off with all his knowledge and deep thoughts,” Dooley said. “
I’ll
tell you something too.”

Kevin could use all the help he could get. “Okay.”

“You need to go home tonight. You need to talk to Eve. Then you need to make love to her until neither of you can move.”

The heat hit him hard. He wanted her in his arms, moving with him, making those sounds…

“Be sure you do the talking first,” Dooley said, clearly reading Kevin’s thoughts.

“That would be great. But I’m working.”

“Hey, guys, what’s up?” Conner Dixon walked in as if it had been scripted.

“About time,” Mac muttered at him.

“I came right over.” Conner looked at Mac with a frown.

Conner clearly wanted Mac’s approval, but Kevin—and everyone else—knew that the kid was going to have to work his ass off to get it. Eventually Mac would let up and mentor the younger guy who so obviously admired him, but he wouldn’t make it easy. Conner should have never told Sara she smelled like cotton candy…and that he really liked cotton candy.

“Good thing you’re here, Dixon,” Sam said, getting to his feet. “Kevin here is heading home.”

“I am?”

“You are,” Dooley said.

Someone had texted Conner to come in for him. So Kevin could go home and talk to Eve.

He wasn’t going to argue with the three best friends a guy could have. “Okay, I’ll see you guys in a couple of days,” he said, heading for his locker.

“And remember…make-up and
then
make-up sex,” Sam called.

“Or make-up sex, make-up and then make-up sex again,” Mac called. “That’s how Sara, Sam’s
little sister
, and I do it.”

“You’re an ass,” Sam said to him.

“An ass your sister is crazy about,” Mac reminded him. “Not that her ass doesn’t make me a little crazy too.”

“She could have done so much better,” Sam muttered.

Mac’s laughter was the last thing Kevin heard as the door shut behind him.

And these were the men giving him advice on women?

But he was grinning as he changed out of his uniform in record time and jogged to the parking lot.

Chapter Ten

Eve eyed the couch. Part of her wanted to sleep there. To make a point. If Kevin was going to be judgmental and unaccepting, then she wasn’t so sure she wanted to be in his bed.