Irreversible Damage (Irreparable) (13 page)

“Brady, this is not his fault.”

My head snaps back toward Tori. I see by her expression that she means it. Why is she defending him?

“You won’t hurt him.”

I rein in my emotions, knowing it will upset her if I don’t. “Fine. I won’t, but I’m not leaving.”

Tori motions to the chair for Davey to have a seat. He does. Tori and I sit on the couch opposite him. His hands are folded in his lap as his foot taps nervously.

“Davey, I invited you here to apologize.”

What? Why the fuck is she apologizing to him? He looks just as surprised as I do.

“You don’t need to do that.” He looks between us. “I owe both of you an apology. I never should have come here that night.”

“You’re damn right!”

Tori squeezes my hand, shooting me an enraged look.

I ignore it. “Why did you, then?”

“I knew how Tori felt about me.” His eyes move from Tori to me. “I also knew I let you down. I felt bad. I thought I could explain what happened to Tori and she might understand me a little better. I never meant for anything bad to happen.”

I ball my fists. “But it did.”

“I know! And I hate myself for that!”

“Not as much as I hate you.” I stand and reach for him, grabbing a handful of his shirt.

“No! Brady, stop.”

Tori pulls my arm. I release Davey and sit back down next to her.

“I don’t blame you, Davey. I want you to know that.” She looks at me for a minute, like she wants me to know, too. Her eyes travel back to Davey. “We all made mistakes. I do understand what you’re going through, and I want to help you.”

My mouth is agape as I listen to her. Fuck helping him. He’s long past help.

“Why would you help me?”

“You helped Brady.” She smiles and grabs my hand. “You could have let him take the fall with you, but you didn’t. If it weren’t for you, Brady and I might have never found each other.”

“I said some horrible things.” I hear remorse in his voice.

“Yes, and so did I,” she admits. “I get why you felt the way you did.”

“I’m sorry.” He’s looking right at me. “I was jealous of what you had.”

Tori nods at him. “Gibson Capital has some resources that I think can help find your child.”

His surprised expression moves between the two of us. “You’d do that for me?”

I don’t say anything.

“I would, but you have to get some help first,” Tori tells him confidently.  “No father deserves to be separated from his child, but you need to be straight if you’re going to be in your child’s life.”

He looks like he might cry. “I’ll do anything.”

“Good.” She smiles kindly at him before turning to me. My heart soars with emotions. “I need to do this to heal.” I nod, reaching up to stroke her face with the back of my fingers. “Will you help him?”

I don’t know why I never thought of it before. The P.I.s at Gibson can find anyone. “Of course.”

I turn my head to look at Davey. He looks hopeful. “I’ll find your kid if you get help and a steady job. You have to work.”

He nods solemnly. “Thanks.”  He stands and looks down at Tori. “I don’t deserve your help.”

She stands and offers him a hug. “Yes, you do.”

He shakes my hand and leaves. I spin to face my beautiful girl. “You are one amazing woman.”

She shakes her head furiously. “No, I just feel awful for him. To go through what he did and then lose his child is so unfair.”

I don’t even know what to say to her. I’m filled with admiration for her and renewed hope for us.

Chapter 16

Tori

At four we leave for the airport to pick up my parents. We drive Liv’s car, as there’s not enough space in Brady’s truck or my Jeep. Brady’s been quiet since getting in the car. We both have, our thoughts adrift with what tomorrow will bring. I squeeze his knee reassuringly. He glances at me briefly with a small smile. Then his eyes return to the road as he takes my hand and holds it.

We pull up to arrivals and spot my parents on the curb. My mom searches my eyes through the window. Her face is solemn as her shoulders sag. Once the car stops, I jump out and engulf her in a hug. She cries against my shoulder.

“Please don’t cry, Mom,” I say, trying to soothe her as best I can while Brady shakes hands with my father before putting their things in the trunk of Liv’s car.

My mom finally leans back, wiping her tears with her palms.

“I’m fine,” I reassure her as I open the front door for her to slip in.

“I’m sorry,” she says with a tender smile as she drops into the front seat. I join my dad in the back. He reaches over and puts his arm around me. I rest my head on his shoulder as Brady drives away from the curb.

We ride in silence, crossing the border and arriving home just before nine. Tug’s Porsche is in the driveway, along with Harrison’s car. My mom and I go inside while my dad and Brady get the luggage.

When we open the door, Harrison, Liv, and Tug are watching TV in the front room. They hop up and hug my mother. She hugs them back. Tug takes her sweater when she removes it and drapes it over the couch. Brady and my father come through the door with my parents’ luggage. After shaking hands with my father, Tug and Harrison take my parents’ things up to the guest bedroom.

“I have some snacks out in the kitchen,” Liv offers.

“Oh, thank you, dear, I’m starving,” my mother responds. Liv grabs her hand, steering her to the kitchen. The rest of us follow.

Before we reach the kitchen, my dad stops, clasping a hand on both my and Brady’s arms. “How are you two really doing?”

I smile, wrapping him a hug. “We’re good, Daddy.”

Liv’s outdone herself with food. The table is covered in fruits, veggies, crackers, and cheese. We could feed an army. We sit around the table, snacking and talking as though it was any other time my parents have come for a visit. No one wants to poke the elephant. It’s perfect.

“The house looks lovely,” my mother chimes in, glancing around. The last time they were here, we hadn’t done much to the place yet.

“Thanks. Liv has a bit of a shopping problem.”

Harrison snorts. “Yeah, you should have seen how much crap she bought for the…”

He stops himself, and Liv gasps, “Harrison.”

“No, it’s fine.” I have to be able to talk about these things. Everyone has been on eggshells, and I hate it. “She went a little overboard on the nursery.”

“Oh.” The small frown casting over my mother’s trembling lips shatters me.

I pull myself together and straighten my spine before I cry. There will be enough tears shed tomorrow. “I loved it.”

“I’m sure it’s beautiful.” My mom smiles.

It was until I took the scissors to it. “So, Dad, how’s the job?” I glance at the faces around the table, noticing the relief in everyone’s expressions for the shift in conversation. My dad grumbles something none of us can hear.

“His boss is in an incompetent asshole.”

A rumble of laugher fills the room. My mother is not one to curse. “Mom.”

“She’s right.” My dad chuckles, leans over, and kisses my mom on the cheek. “Your mom gets the brunt of it.”

We spend the rest of the night discussing Brady’s music, the Center, and Tug’s work at Gibson Capital. I situate my parents in the room next to ours rather than the spare room downstairs. I like having them close. Before I leave, Mom reminds me to wake them up early.

When I enter our room, Brady’s on the bed. He’s lost in thought when his phone vibrates on the nightstand. He smiles at me as he picks up his phone. I notice his brow wrinkle as he looks at the screen. He returns the phone to the nightstand and taps the bed next to him. I sit down and lean into his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.

“Who was it?”

I feel him shrug beneath me. “No one important.”

I could argue, but I’m exhausted, and I need my sleep if I’m going to hold up tomorrow. “I love you.”

His fingers skim my arm. “I love you, too.”

Before long I’m fast asleep.

Morning makes its arrival all too quickly. I open my eyes to find I’m tucked neatly into Brady’s side, still wearing my clothes from last night. I turn to see Brady awake and watching me.  We smile sincerely at each other.

I fight against the ache in my stomach that threatens to bring tears. His expression tells me he feels it, too. Today is the day we say goodbye to our little girl.

“I love you.” He kisses my head. “I’ll be by your side all day.”

I nod against his chest, squeezing him hard. I get up from the bed and go to wake my parents. Their rooms are empty and the beds made. I’m guessing they’ve gone down for coffee. When I come back to our room, Brady’s in the shower. I want to slip in with him, but I can’t. I haven’t been naked in front of him since it happened. I run my hands over my scar. It’s numb, but I feel the staples prickle my fingers through my pants. They’re ugly, both in appearance and in what they represent. I have an appointment to remove them in a few days. I hope once they’re out, I’ll feel more secure.

I go down to the kitchen to find my parents at the table. My dad’s on his iPad, and Mom is filing her nails.

“Good morning.” I greet both of them with a kiss on the head before pouring a cup of coffee. “How’d you sleep?”

“Good,” my dad says at the same time my mother says,

“Awful. You’re dad’s snoring kept me awake.”

I smile. Some things never change. I don’t think my mom’s had a decent night sleep since before she was married.

Dad looks over the top of his iPad. “It’s these damn allergies.”

Mom rolls her eyes, and I laugh.

After I shower, I slip on a simple black dress and look myself over in the mirror. I don’t bother with makeup. It will only end up smeared all over my face.

“God, you’re beautiful.”

I smile at Brady through the mirror as he strolls up behind me. He slips an arm around my waist, flattening his palm on my stomach. I flinch. He removes his hand as I watch his face contort in the mirror.

“I’m sorry.”

I turn in his arms to face him. “It’s just a little tender,” I reassure him.

“Everyone’s ready.”

I let out a small sigh. “Okay. I just need to grab my purse.”

“Liv has it.”

I take a deep cleansing breath as Brady drops his lips to my forehead, kissing gently. I close my eyes, breathing him in. “I love you.”

He holds my hand as we make our way downstairs.

We pile into two cars. Brady, my parents, and I are in one, and Liv, Harrison, and Tug are in another. After crossing the border, we sit in traffic through downtown San Diego. We arrive in Pacific Beach ten minutes before services are supposed to start. We’re having Mona laid to rest at the same cemetery where my Brady’s real parents are buried and where my parents already own a plot. I want Mona with her family.

Tug meets with the representatives from the funeral home. He’s handled all the arrangements. I don’t know what I would’ve done if he wasn’t here.

Soon, a few more cars pull up. Jesse and Chad get out of the first car. I spot Jessica with Chad. She runs up and wraps me in a hug. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” she says in my ear before releasing the hug. It takes everything in me not to start bawling. “If you need anything at all, I’m here for you. Chad and I love you, girl.”

I melt. I love them, too. “Thank you.”

Chad hugs me next, offering the same condolences, and then Jesse. The three of them move on to Brady. I glance toward the cars and see Rodrigo. He’s dressed in a black suit, so different from his usual shorts and T-shirts.

I throw my arms around him first. It means so much to me that he’s here. “Thank you for coming,” I tell him, releasing our hug.

He holds my hands to his chest. “You and Brady are like family. I love you,
mija
.”

“I love you, too.”

When I look over toward the cars again, I freeze. My heartbeat accelerates to a point where it feels like it might leap from my chest. What the fuck is he doing here?

I hear Liv yell, “No! Brady, don’t!” She runs toward him, but her heel catches in the sod.

The next thing I see is Brady slamming Jake up against the door of his car. They’re both screaming, but I can’t make out what they’re saying. I run toward them. When I reach them, Tug is there, standing in between the two of them. They’re panting and out of breath, yet still sizing each other up.

“You have some nerve showing up here.” I glare at my unfaithful ex, angry and confused. How could he show up here, after everything he’s put me through? “How did you even know?”

“My sister heard from Jesse.” He frowns at my harsh words. “I came to pay my condolences.”

“Your condolences?” I spit, stepping up close to him.

Brady tries to sidestep Tug, the anger rolling off him in waves. I hold my hand up to stop him.

“We were together for three years, Victoria. We were close. I care about you.”

“Don’t fucking call me that!” My teeth clench tight. “How dare you say you care about me? For three damn years, you cared about me so much that you slept with any girl who stood still long enough.”

“I’ve apologized for that.”

“Son.” My dad’s firm voice breaks in. “I think you need to leave. We’re burying my granddaughter today, and your presence is not only unwanted, but extremely disrespectful.”

“Yes, sir.” Jake bows his head. He might be a womanizing pig, but he’s always been respectful to my parents.  “I’m sorry for the disturbance.” He glances between Brady and me. “I’m truly sorry for your loss.”

While I watch Jake drive away, I see a familiar Volkswagen Thing parking a few cars up. I run over to give, Ted – my ex-Rasta wannabe boss – a hug. I miss working with him at the coffee shop. As I hug him, I feel guilty for not visiting him more often. I suck back tears and thank him for coming.

“Hey, now, no tears.” He holds my cheek thoughtfully in his big hand. “You don’t want to see this old guy cry, do you?”

I smile up at the big lug.

The service lasts an hour. I hold it together for the most part, clutching Brady’s hand. It’s not until “I Hope You Dance” by Lee Ann Womak starts to play that I completely lose it. I sob uncontrollably throughout the entire song. Each verse is more torturous than the next. At one point I nearly ask them to turn it off, but Brady reaches around my neck and pulls me close, holding me firmly against his body as I wail my eyes out all over his suit jacket. I feel his chest heave against my cheek, and then I hear his tears. When I look up at him, he wipes them clean and sucks in a breath. He’s trying to be strong.