In the Shadow of the Shield (Secret Lives Series Book 2) (8 page)

“Won’t that be trespassing?”

Carter didn’t answer. He really didn’t need to.

“Is it safe?”

“The place was decontaminated after Donnie…”

“Right.” She turned away and studied a shadow on the wall.

“I’ll make sure you’re okay.”

“I know you will. I actually feel very safe with you. I am trying to decide if I can handle it emotionally.”

Diana fell silent for a moment, and Carter didn’t say anything to break the silence. Could she actually visit the place that had essentially killed Donnie? Would she be able to keep it together, knowing that someone may have intentionally harmed the man she’d loved more than half her life? She took a deep breath and turned back to look at Carter. Donnie deserved justice. If someone was responsible for his death, then she owed it to him to find out who and why. Carter could help her with that.

“Okay. Let’s do it.”

He rose from the sofa, grabbing her hand on his way up and pulling her to her feet with him. “Excellent. Pick you up at eight?”

“In the morning?” Diana hadn’t been out of bed before ten since Donnie’s death. There never seemed a reason good enough to get up. Carter chuckled and gave her a quick hug.

“Yes. In the morning.”

She laughed too, realizing how ridiculous she sounded. “All right, I’ll be ready and waiting.”

“I’m going to head out now. I need to hit the hay. It’s been a long couple of days.” He started walking toward the front door. Diana hurried past him to shut off the alarm and open the door. As he stepped onto the porch, Carter paused, turned, and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead.

“I am so glad that you are okay, Diana. I couldn’t imagine losing you, when I’ve only just found you.”

He disappeared into the night before she could respond. His words echoed in her mind as Diana closed the door and set the alarm. Jackson wouldn’t be home for at least another hour. As she headed back to the living room to log into her laptop, she could still feel Carter’s lips against her skin.

She had really liked the feeling.

Chapter Eight

Diana: Hey girls, how is everyone tonight?

Cyndi: Di! I didn’t think you were going to make it tonight.

Angela: Hey, Diana. How are you feeling? I heard what happened.

Diana: I’m okay. Face is all banged up. I won’t be winning any beauty contests for a while.

Jessy: Oh, Diana! I am sure you are still absolutely stunning.

Diana: Aww, thanks for the vote of confidence, Jessy, but trust me, it’s pretty bad. Carter doesn’t seem to mind though.

Cyndi: Carter? You better spill right now, girl!

Angela: Do you mean Carter Ryan?

Diana: Umm, yeah. Do you know him?

Angela: Oh yes. Jake has brought him by the house a couple of times. He is hot!

Cyndi: Oh, I know who he is! Ang is absolutely right!

Jessy: How come I don’t know him?

Angela: I don’t know. Jake and Sam work with all the same guys.

Jessy: Hmmm…I need to look into this.

Cyndi: What I want to know is how Diana knows him…

Diana: Donnie was his field training officer.

Angela: Yeah, like a dozen years ago. How do you know him now?

Diana: Oh, that.

Cyndi: Yes! That.

Diana: We met at—when I went to visit Donnie the other day. We had coffee. He is pretty hot. *blushes*

Jessy: And?

Diana: You already know the rest. I got in a car wreck and spent the night in the hospital.

Angela: That’s it? That’s the big story? Disappointed.

Diana: LOL! That’s not the whole story.

Angela: Oh! Do tell!

Diana: He came by tonight to check on me.

Cyndi: How sweet of him. Jackson let him in the house?

Diana: Jackson was at school watching a basketball game.

Jessy: Is Jackson still having issues with Donnie’s death?

Diana: No. Maybe. I don’t think he wants to see me with another man though, no matter how innocent it is.

Cyndi: Is it innocent?

Diana: Cyndi! Of course it is! I am like eight years older than he is.

Cyndi: So…that means you can’t have any interest in him?

Diana: Well, isn’t it sort of weird?

Angela: Weird how?

Diana: Because I am older.

Jessy: Ridiculous! This is the twenty-first century. It’s a sexual revolution and all that.

Cyndi: Eight years isn’t that big of a deal, Di.

Diana: Really?

Cyndi: Really.

Angela: I think you should go for it. It’s been a year, Donnie wouldn’t want you to be alone forever.

Diana: I’ve actually tried to convince myself of that, but it sort of feels like I am being unfaithful if
I
am with any man other than the one I vowed to love forever.

Jessy: The vows say until death do you part. You are young and sexy, do you really want to waste the best years of your life sleeping alone?

Diana: Jessy! You are the last one I expected that out of. LOL

Jessy: What? It’s not like I’m not human simply because I’m modest.

Cyndi: Jessy is right, Di. Even if nothing happens with the handsome Carter Ryan, don’t be alone the rest of your life out of guilt.

Diana: Guilt? Who said anything about guilt?

Cyndi: I’m sorry. I just meant—

Diana: I know. Don’t worry about it. I am struggling—I haven’t been attracted to anyone but Donnie since I was a teenager. It’s unnerving.

Angela: I think it’s wonderful. You deserve happiness, Di. We all want it for you.

Diana: Thanks, Ang. I have a lot to work through, but I appreciate the support.

Jessy: We are all here for you. I am so glad you are okay. I heard your car was a mess.

Diana: Yeah. I’m going to have to go shopping for a new one.

Cyndi: Let me know if you need someone to go with you.

Diana: I will, Cyn. Thank you. How’s Jason doing these days?

Cyndi: Still trying to get over the fact that I know how to work a pole and that he, in his words, ‘almost lost you forever.’

Diana: I’m sorry.

Cyndi: Don’t be. The only thing I regret is that I miss the job a lot. Johnny and Roxy were very colorful characters. They made things interesting.

Angela: To say the least. LOL

Diana: Well, those colorful characters almost sold you into slavery.

Cyndi: I know. And I am so thankful that didn’t happen, but before that I really enjoyed my job.

Diana: I am sure I can get you in at my job. Rick is always looking for new talent.

Cyndi: LOL! Thank you, but I am definitely better at dancing than talking dirty!

Diana: It’s a lot easier than you would think. Let me know if you ever change your mind.

Cyndi: You know I will!

Jessy: Well, ladies, I am going to go ahead and call it a night. You all sleep well.

Angela: Yeah, I’m out of here too. Sleep tight, and don’t let the bedbugs bite!

Cyndi: Night, ladies! I’m hanging it up too, Di. I am so glad you are getting your life back a little. This last year has had me very worried. When you stopped joining our little chats, I thought you were gone for good.

Diana: I hate the fact that I was so lost for so long. I really missed you.

Cyndi: Just promise me that the next time something happens, you won’t cut me out of your life like that. I’m here for you. We all are.

Diana: I know. I’m sorry. This has been the most incredibly difficult year.

Cyndi: *Hugs* I love you.

Diana: Thanks, Cyn. Love you too. I’m going to head to bed now.

Cyndi: Me too. Talk soon.

Diana: Definitely.

She shut down her computer and put herself to bed. In a few hours Carter would be back, and they would check out the house. Maybe she would finally get some answers about her husband’s death—and a little peace.

***

Seven a.m. rolled around much too quickly. The alarm sounded, and Diana groaned. She hadn’t gotten nearly enough sleep, and every muscle in her body ached, especially her neck and shoulders. She had neglected to take her pain meds before going to bed, and her body was letting her know.

A hot shower later, she stood in the bathroom studying the angry bruises that seemed to get uglier with each passing moment.

“You look like you’ve been hit by a truck. Oh wait, you were,” Diana said, addressing her reflection.

“Bye, Mom! I’m heading out!” Jackson called from outside her bedroom door.

“Have a good day!” she called back.

The slamming door was the only reply she got. At least Jackson would be gone when Carter got there. She wasn’t ready to explain anything to her son yet—just in case nothing came of what they were doing.

When the doorbell rang a half hour later, she was dressed in jeans, a t-shirt, and a fleece pullover. Her shoulder-length hair had dried wild and curly, serving as a bit of a distraction from the hot mess that was her face. Grabbing her purse and slipping into her jacket, Diana opened the door and greeted Carter with a big smile. He was rubbing his hands and stomping his feet. She had to give him credit, he tried hard to hide his wince when he saw her bruises.

“This has got to be a record-setting cold.”

“Yeah. Sometimes I forget where we live. We shouldn’t be this cold—ever.”

With his hand at the small of her back, Carter guided her down the steps and into the passenger side of his pickup truck. She tried to ignore the tingling his touch incited. The vehicle was running, and the heat in the cab hit her full blast as he pulled the door open.

Scrambling inside and situating herself, she was clicking her seatbelt closed when Carter climbed into the driver’s seat. Out of nowhere, a wave of panic washed over her. She hadn’t considered the fact that she was now terrified to get into a vehicle.

Look, Di, you need to get it together here. You have to get into a car again sooner or later. Might as well be today.

Her hands shook, so she crossed her arms to try and hide it. Carter was quick, though, and he shot her a sideways glance. “Are you okay?”

“Yes. I’m fine. Just cold.”

Her lie seemed sound to her, since it was polar cold outside. Apparently the man was not only hot, but perceptive as well.

“I’m very cautious when I drive, but with you in the car, I promise to be extra careful.”

She looked at him and nodded. “I trust you, but if it’s all the same, I’m going to close my eyes for a bit.”

Picking up her hand, he gave it a little squeeze. “You do what you have to do.”

“Thank you,” she replied, closing her eyes. Carter backed the truck out of the driveway and eased it down her street. By the time they reached the corner and turned onto Virginia Beach Boulevard, her eyes were open. She still gripped the door handle, and her eyes darted all over the place looking for potential accidents, but she slowly relaxed enough to at least stop shaking like a leaf on a tree in a hurricane.

“See, this isn’t so bad, now is it?” He reached over and took her hand again. Somewhere inside her a little voice told her to take her hand back, but she told that voice to shut up.

“I’ll survive. I had no idea how scary it would be getting back in a car. I wonder how I’ll manage driving again.”

Carter pulled the truck onto the interstate. “You’ll be fine. I’m completely sure of that.”

“Maybe.” Diana watched out the window as they passed other vehicles. “How fast are you going?”

“The speed limit is sixty-five, so I’m going sixty-five. I promise.” She glanced over at the speedometer and saw that he told the truth. Donnie never went the posted speed limit. He used to joke that the signs were just guidelines. It made her absolutely crazy, especially when Jackson was a baby. “I’m a professional driver,” he used to tell her, and then he would laugh.

“Sorry. I don’t mean to be such a baby.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about. You’ve had a rough couple of days with the accident, and now we are going to the place that caused your husband’s death. That’s a lot to put on one person.”

“I’m not usually so difficult about everything.”

Carter laughed. “You’re not being difficult.”

“I am. And it pisses me off. I pride myself on being the strong cop’s wife who can handle anything that comes her way, and the first sign of adversity has me whining like a two-year-old. Of course, I’m not a cop’s wife anymore. I suppose when Donnie died, I lost my membership.”

“Nope. I heard that once a cop’s wife, always a cop’s wife. Well, except my ex. She’s a crazy bitch, so she lost that title the day she left. She didn’t deserve it anyway.”

“I hate that your marriage went south so quickly. You deserve a good wife.”

“I’m not sorry.” He glanced at her and smiled. She knew exactly what he was hinting at, and, quite frankly, she had to agree. She returned a shy smile, hoping he didn’t notice the flush building in her cheeks.