If Ever I Fall (16 page)

“Why isn’t Sean here?” Out of curiosity I decide to ask. Sean has been a real good friend to me.

“He didn’t want me to say anything, but his girlfriend had a miscarriage. They are taking it pretty hard.”  My heart hurts for them. That has to be horrible.

“Oh my god! That is so sad. I can’t even imagine.” I don’t know what I would do if anything like that ever happened to me.

“I know. It’s rough on them both but I think he is taking it harder. He’s been talking about having kids a lot lately and this happens.” Gavin is breathless as he drags the tree the rest of the way.

“I don’t know what to do in this situation. Should we text him or something?” It was an honest question but as soon as Gavin sets the tree against the porch his eyes narrow in on me. Was that not the right question? Shit, what did I do?

I watch him lick his lips before he opens his mouth to talk and I’m a little scared that I said something wrong.

“I will never get tired of hearing that.” Crossing his arms over his chest, I look at him confused.

“What are you talking about it?” Maybe all the cold numbed his mind. Crazy man.

“The word we coming out of your mouth. I love you Laney. Everything that happens from now on I want to be about us. No more Laney or Gavin, I want it all to be us.” How does he have such a way with words? How can he make my insides melt into little puddles with the way he speaks?

I step forward before he grabs me and hugs me against him.

“There were a lot of times that I didn’t think I would ever find love again until I met you. Even then I didn’t know if love was real anymore. You breathe life into me Laney.” He has to stop or I’m going to lose it.

Tears trickle from my eyes before his lips find mine. So gentle and slow.

“Gavin why is she crying? Boy I tell you if you hurt her feelings, I have a stick right there!” Edith comes outside and looks between us as she points to the stick on the porch.

I laugh so hard and I can’t stop. I wrap my arms around Gavin’s waist and snuggle my face into his chest. This is my new favorite place to be.

                                
 
Gavin

Christmas Eve at grandmas has to be the best time of year. She cooks up a storm and we all tell stories around the fire.

I miss grandpa being here since he always told the best ones but grandma makes up for that too.

The tree looks amazing in the corner all decorated and lite up the way it is. I must say I did a good job picking that one.

When the kids are all in bed, grandma has a tradition for us older ones. She hand makes ornaments for each one of us to add to the tree. It’s her tradition to do it on Christmas Eve.

“Ok, come on. Let’s hang the ornaments.” She smiles as she pulls out a big box and walks towards the tree.

One by one she hands them to each of us as we take them and pick a place to hang them.

Laney stands off to the side watching in awe as we each take our turn. Silently my heart swells in my chest when I watch grandma walk towards her with a small box in her hand.

I called ahead of time and asked her to make a special one for Laney.

“Gavin’s a good boy. He has the heart of gold and he’s a true lover. It’s rare to find someone like him and when you do you have to hold on tightly.” I can hear her words since I’m not that far away and I love her to death for it.

“You touched his heart and soul young lady and that is a magnificent thing. This is your ornament that he asked me to make for you and I can only hope that you are here for years to come to hang it on that family tree.” Laney’s eyes pool with tears as she turns to look at me. My smile could light the room right now as I watch her.

She beams with love and thankfulness before she rushes towards me. Throwing her arms around my neck I catch her and hold her close.

“I want to be your family Laney. We all do.”  Her tears wet my shirt as my grandma steps up to us putting her hand on Laney’s shoulder.

I set her down before wiping her eyes with my thumbs.

“Take your place sweetheart. You will never be able to leave this spot.” Grandma’s hand comes up to rest on my chest right above my heart and I swear I want to cry with her.

She passes Laney her ornament and we all watch as she walks to the tree and hangs it next to mine. Everyone in the living room cheers and hollers but I don’t hear them.

All I see is Laney. Everything else fades away and I’m lost in the flawlessness that is her beauty. Inside and out she is the perfect person for me.

Laney comes to stand by my side as we all look at the tree lit up in the corner. It amazes me that there are so many of us here together. She may not have had a family growing up but she sure as hell has one now.

“I want you to take me to bed.” Her eyes are soft as she kisses me slowly. I would take this girl anywhere she wanted, bed being the first.

“Gladly.” Kissing her cheek, I tell everyone goodnight and we head upstairs. Laney heads straight into the bathroom while I drop on the edge of the bed and smile.

Everything in my life may not be perfect but the one thing that is is my family. No matter what we are always there for each other and it makes me proud of each one of them.

The bathroom door opens and when I look up my heart dances. Laney is standing in the doorway in one of my t-shirts. No pajama bottoms like she usually has.

Scars and deformations mar her legs but that doesn’t make her one ounce less perfect to me. Is this what she has been worried about this whole time?

“As hot as you look in my shirt, I want you naked.” Heat floods my body as my eyes travel over her. She looks damn hot in my shirt but my dick is screaming for the rest of the view.

“It doesn’t bother you?” I see the question in her eyes and there I have my answer. This is what she’s been hiding from me. All this time she’s been afraid that I wouldn’t want her because of her legs.

Shaking my head, I don’t move from my spot on the bed. I’m afraid if I do I will fuck her against that wall she’s standing by.

“Are you crazy? I fell in love with you Laney. I fell in love with your heart, mind and soul. Everything else is just a bonus. Why would that bother me anyway? It’s a part of you and when I said I wanted you that meant every part.” She eyes me wearily. She’s still unsure of what I mean. I can see it in her eyes.

“Is that from the fire?” Her head nods slightly but her eyes never leave mine.

“Take that shirt off.” A new fire catches in her eyes. Her chest heaves as her nerves mess with her head. She needs to see just how exquisite she truly is.

I stand up pulling my shirt over my head and tossing it to the floor while Laney eyes my body.

“Take it off. I want it back.” I wink at her lightening the mood a little. I know she’s tense and this is new to her and I want her comfortable.

She slowly reaches for the hem and pulls it painstakingly slow up her body. My dick jerks in my jeans and my mouth waters. The scars go all the way up her legs nearing her hips. I finally understand why she’s been so closed off with me.

When the shirt is completely off she holds it in front of her before I take a step towards her, snatching it away. Her nervousness is visible now.

I walk over to the large mirror that hangs on the wall across the room and stop.

“Come here.” Slowly she takes a step towards me unsure of herself and me in this moment.

“Come here.” I tell her again, this time she does.

Standing in front of me fully naked, I pull her against my body, kissing the tip of her nose before spinning her around. I pull her body flush against mine, her back to my front.

“Look at you. Not your reflection but the real you. That one that I love, the one that has a heart that no one else has. Look at the girl that fought for her life and won. The one that wears her scars like a badge of honor. Someone tried to take something as precious as life away from you and you didn’t let them. That is the only thing I see when I look at you. Those scars on your legs are a piece of you.”

                                  
 
Laney

I stand here with Gavin’s arms wrapped around me, a new peace flowing through my body. This whole time I was afraid that he would look at me like the rest of the guys I dated did, broken and ugly.

I should have known it from the start that Gavin was different than they were, he always has been.

Letting him see the ugly parts of me his touch and love is slowly fixing them. He can’t fix the visible mess but the internal storm that has brewed for so long is slowly fading away as his hands roam over my stomach.

“You always amaze me Gavin. The things I thought I had to hide from you, to keep you away are things that draw you in closer. I never knew that was possible.”

Spinning me in his arms, he holds my chin in his hand.

“You don’t have to hide anything from me. I want every part of you Laney. Even the bad stuff. Your past is now a part of me and as much as you let me, I will take away what I can.” His lips press into mine before his hands roam down my back.

Tingles spread throughout my body as he makes me come alive. All this time I have been breathing but not living but in this moment, Gavin is changing that.

“I won’t do anything but kiss you until you’re ready.” He walks us back to the bed where I climb on and he sits taking his shoes off.

“What if I’m ready now?” Fire shoots through me as he looks over his shoulder at me. He’s trying to see if I really am. I think it’s adorable but at the same time I can see the lust that he’s been holding back for so long.

Gavin has been patient with me and I know he’s wanted this for so long but my heart couldn’t handle another break.  He is slowly mending it but if he rejected me like so many others, I don’t think I could ever be whole again.

Fire flickers in his eyes as he yanks his jeans off and climbs on the bed.

“You have no idea how long I’ve waited for you to say that. Blue balls are a motherfucker.” I giggle as he lays me back on the bed loving that I have the playful Gavin along with the sweet one.

He positions himself between my legs as my body screams for more of his touch.

“After this I will fuck you on every surface of every place we go.” I smile up at him before he slides so gently inside of me, filling me full of him.

I gasp at the pleasure and size of him. He feels like a perfect fit.

“I don’t think your grandma would like that very much.” I have to tease him a little. Gavin’s face lights up before he kisses me slowly.

“I don’t care what anyone says. I love you.”  Before I can speak the words back, he’s deeper inside of me.

The roll of his hips just pulls him in deeper. I never thought having him inside of me would be so fulfilling but it is.

His lips travel my neck setting my body on fire with need.

“Please Gavin.” I lift my hips to get him to stop this torturously slow pace before he sucks my flesh into his mouth.

“Ohh!” He’s killing me softly with all of this.

“You want me to fuck you hard? Or love you slow?” His words ring in my head as I grip his back, digging my nails in.

“Hard. Please, I need to feel you.” Whining seems like a good thing until he grabs my leg throwing it over his shoulder.

I watch as he runs his hand up and down the scarred mess before he turns his head and kisses my leg. Shivers shake me to the core.

“Hold on baby.” His eyes twinkle in the light right before he slams into me roughly.

                              
 
Gavin

God damn she has been holding out on me. I can’t believe it has taken this long to get inside of her. I didn’t want to come out last night and this morning was no different. Hell, I could live happily in bed with that girl.

“What are you doing?” Laney’s eyes fly to my hand that’s stroking my dick as I watch her get dressed. I can’t help it, I’m a man!