I Am Yours (Heartbeat #3) (2 page)

Chapter Three
Katie

I wish that could have been my first kiss. There’s no denying the intensity Adam’s lips conveyed. He wants me, like the go-all-the-way, get-in-my-pants kind of wants me. And what kills me is that I’m not even afraid of him, and that’s what scares me the most, because I should be.

He’s the one I dream about every night, the face I’ve seen for months every time I close my eyes.

Kelly insisted that I get close to Brian’s little brother this weekend. She encouraged me to go out of my way to be nice to him. But since I’m incapable of flirting—I’m a complete disaster at it—she kept harping on how important it was to follow his lead. If he seemed into me, she told me to go for it. Forget the fact that he was bringing a date.

But I had no idea I would meet my dream guy in the flesh and that he would equate me with a dead chick. Not to mention, his girlfriend is currently screaming her head off, but I can’t say that I blame her. He’s an unbelievable kisser. I wouldn’t want to lose him to another girl either.

Adam stands up, leaving my side as he continues to argue with her. It’s getting pretty heated and I try to look away. It sure sounds like more than a lovers’ quarrel, at least on her end. She’s really tearing him a new one.

It’s not like negativity is a new thing for me. Living with my dad, I’m surrounded by it on a daily basis. He’s a pro when it comes to dishing out verbal abuse. That’s why I hate any form of confrontation. I’d rather walk away than deal with whatever’s brewing between these two. I have no intention of sticking myself where I don’t belong. I can take a hint.

Carefully, I tiptoe off the porch and keep walking. I don’t even look back. Sometimes I feel like I’m a magnet for tension. It follows me wherever I go. My hope was to spend a few days in the Outer Banks as a nice break from all of the passive aggression I have to deal with at home. But I guess that’s not going to happen.

I wander down a tree-lined street until I get closer to the harbor area of Manteo. There’s a bookshop on the left where I spent much of the morning flipping through paperbacks of several of the area’s ghost stories. The afterlife is sort of an obsession of mine. I was so engrossed in the pages that I nearly leapt out of my skin when the store’s cat brushed against my legs. The creepy tales certainly got my heart beating faster. They don’t call it the ’Graveyard of the Atlantic’ for nothing.

With regret, I peer longingly at the store’s window display but maintain a steady pace. The tall masts of an Elizabethan ship loom in the distance. It’s a re-creation but it’s still impressive to look at. I mosey by the restaurants and gift shops before pausing on the bridge that overlooks the marina. The water is calm and peaceful as numerous boats bob up and down. I close my eyes and all I hear is the lapping of the waves and the clunky footfalls of people walking across the boardwalk.

I gasp when I feel someone’s arms slide around my waist. My eyes fly open and my muscles tense. I’m literally trapped against the railing. I can’t move. I’m just about to call for help when my captor nestles his cheek next to mine.

“You didn’t think I’d let you go that easily, did you?” It’s Adam. His warm breath tickles my ear but I can’t bring myself to look at him.

“I thought you needed some space. I didn’t want to eavesdrop on your conversation.” It’s best if I keep things light. His girlfriend just caught him cheating on her. Things like that don’t usually happen to me—being the other woman is definitely a first.

“Katie…” And the way he utters my name makes me want to curl right into him. “There’s nothing going on between Jada and me. She’s my friend, my co-worker. But whatever relationship we have at this point is strictly platonic.”

“Jada doesn’t seem to think so…and your mom did call her your girlfriend.” I don’t mean to catch him in a lie but it’s true. I may be inexperienced when it comes to guys but I’m not stupid.

“It’s complicated.” His shoulders droop as his chin touches my shoulder. “All I can tell you is that I didn’t want to attend my brother’s wedding alone. I was totally up front with Jada about the role she’d be playing in order to fool my family. I guess she took it a little too much to heart.”

“So she’s had a crush on you for a while then?” I’m not used to having a guy hold me like this as I sense him shift his weight from side to side. He’s nervous. Good. I’m not buying his story that he feels nothing for Jada.

“Practically since the day we met.” He sounds so cocky about it, like why wouldn’t she fall for him? “But I made it clear I wasn’t interested.”

“Really?” I like being in his arms but I don’t know how much more of his bullshit I can take.

“There’s only one girl for me…and that’s you.” He turns me around and places his forehead against mine. I want to question his preposterous claim, but I’m rendered speechless. Because in the depths of my soul, it feels like he’s done this before, even though he hasn’t.

“Adam, I…” He glides his fingers over my lips before I can finish.

“Shhh, I get it. It’s a lot. I know.” He continues to lightly caress my face. “I shouldn’t have kissed you back there. It was too much, too soon. But I couldn’t resist. I promise I’ll try harder. I won’t touch you unless you want me to. Just don’t send me away. Please give me a chance to show you how much you mean to me.”

“But, Adam, I don’t understand. I have no problem recalling every day I spent from last winter until now. There aren’t any gaps in my memory. It’s not like I could forget about you or anything.” My brow creases as I press my hands against his chest. “You’re not someone I’d easily forget.” I can’t bring myself to tell him about my dreams. It’s all too bizarre. I just need time to figure things out for myself before I even contemplate discussing what I’ve experienced with him.

“Katie, I’ve been having dreams…nightmares…about you for months. Ever since you died. I can’t explain it. And then to find you here, it doesn’t make sense.” He guides his hands on top of mine, lacing our fingers together. “But I’m determined to get to the bottom of it. All I need to hear is that you might be attracted to me in some way, no matter how small.”

I swallow hard. “I am.” Wait…he’s been having dreams, too? But why is he calling them nightmares?

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “There’s something drawing me to you. I can’t deny it even if I wanted to. I don’t know how or why, but it’s there.”

I look down as I whisper, “Yeah, I feel it too.” Now would be the perfect time to tell him about my dreams. So why am I unable to do so?

“Can I kiss you again?” He’s the picture of hope as he lightly strokes my chin.

“Yes.” I sigh as he bends down, capturing my lips with his.

I try to enjoy the moment, but I can’t quiet my guilty conscience. I know he’s going to hate me when he finds out that I’ve been lying to him.

Chapter Four
Jada

“I’m sorry the room’s so small, but it’s the best I could do on such short notice.” I stare up at Adam’s brother, Brian, as he stands awkwardly in the doorway of yet another motel room, this one bedecked in a tacky, faux Tudor style.

“Don’t worry. It’ll do for one night.” I stub my toe while nudging my suitcase against the wall, but I don’t even feel it. I’m so frazzled.

“You’re seriously going to hop on a bus and head back to Pennsylvania tomorrow? Jada, aren’t you exhausted?” I thought Brian would be a real douchebag, but so far he’s been super nice. Rescuing me from that damn timeshare was more than enough to change my opinion of him. Thankfully, he was bored with the endless wedding preparations and came back before the others. He found me bawling on the hood of Adam’s Neon. Once he heard my story, he wasted no time in getting me out of there.

“So what if I am? I’m sure as hell not going to hang around here.” Brian doesn’t even bristle at the sharpness of my tone. Kelly has him whipped. He’s used to having a domineering woman order him around.

“I can’t make heads or tails of this whole thing. First, my brother goes into a tailspin over some dead girl. Then I try to help him pick up the pieces and he basically screws me out of everything I ever cared about.” He kicks the doorframe with his shoe. “So let’s just say I sympathize with your plight.”

“Adam really has a way of destroying the people he supposedly cares about, doesn’t he?” I try to chuckle but it comes out more like a sob. “Brian, you have a big day tomorrow. You don’t have to stay here and commiserate with me. I’ll be all right.”

“Please. I was supposed to go out with Adam and my dad for their lame-ass attempt at a bachelor party. Trust me, it’s the last thing I want to do.” He shoves his hands in his pockets as he sizes me up. “How about you and I go drown our sorrows instead?”

“You want me to help you forget about the noose that’s going around your neck tomorrow…is that it?” I roll my eyes at him as he nods, a grin hovering on his lips.

“Yeah, pretty much. Besides, why don’t you stay here a few days and relax? You don’t have to come to the wedding or see Adam or anything. Just take some time to get your head on straight before you have to face the real world again.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal when it totally is.

“Just so we’re on the same page, you do realize I know the baby is Adam’s, right?” I don’t hesitate. I go in for the kill.

“Supposedly.” Instead, I’m the one thrown off balance by his response.

“Dude, Adam told me there’s no way it’s yours.” I march across the room, forcing Brian to look me in the eye.

“I didn’t say I thought it was mine, did I?” He glares down at me, the pain evident in his voice.

“Well, whose baby is it?” Despite how Adam treated me today, I’m glad he might have a way out of this mess.

“I have a hunch, but that’s all it is. I’m not ready to act on it yet. I’ll know when the time is right.” Brian’s gaze never wavers from my face. I’m too caught up in what he’s telling me to hide what I’m feeling.

“But you’re still going to marry Kelly?” I knit my brows together, totally confused.

“I love her.” He says those three little words like it’s an irrefutable fact.

“You O’Malley boys. Once you get your heart set on a woman, forget about it.” I shake my head in disbelief. “You’re too good for her, Brian. I hope you realize that.”

“You don’t know Kelly like I do, all right?” He pulls out his phone to check the time. “So are we doing this or not?”

“Yeah, I guess. Can you chill in the lobby until I freshen up a bit?” There’s no way I’m letting Brian out of my sight if he thinks his soon-to-be wife is framing Adam.

“Don’t be long because I could sure use a drink.” Judging by the secrets he’s keeping, I can see why.

“Ten minutes tops, okay?” I’ll be cutting it close but I can’t have Brian growing impatient either.

He grunts, letting the door close behind him. As soon as he’s gone, I breathe a sigh of relief. It’s time to put my plan into action. Grabbing my phone, I yelp when it comes into contact with my face. Leave it to me to aggravate my burn. It’s healing slowly but it’s still tender. The discomfort reminds me of all the damage Adam has inflicted on my life since February, and I can’t help but groan inwardly.

It’s getting late but I know he’ll pick up. He’s a workaholic. Besides, he didn’t think he could get rid of me that easily, did he?

After the fourth ring, I finally hear his voice. “Hello?”

“Mr. Talbot, it’s Jada. Sorry to bother you, but I need your help.”

Chapter Five
Adam

“It’s too bad Katie isn’t feeling well.” Kelly’s voice scatters my thoughts. I’m ankle deep in the surf, oblivious to the beauty of the sunset that surrounds me. “It’s so romantic out here, don’t you think?” I don’t respond, so Kelly wades into the water until her pregnant belly nudges against my side. “I could imagine a few things the two of us could be doing right now.” She runs her fingers up my arm as a wave breaks upon our legs.

“You shouldn’t be doing this. What if Brian sees you out here with me?” The last rays of the sun reflect the auburn highlights in her hair. Subconsciously, I resume my old habit of transforming the woman next to me, imagining Katie in her place.

“He’s not even here. He took off with Jada and never came back.” She tosses her head and strands of her hair tickle my arm. “Apparently, he’d rather spend his last night as a bachelor with her instead of you.”

“Jada can do whatever she likes. She’s a big girl.” I knew Jada needed to blow off some steam, but I thought she went off on her own somewhere. I never imagined that she’d be out partying with my brother.

“So she’s not really your girlfriend, is she?” The beginnings of a smile tug at the corners of Kelly’s mouth. “C’mon, Adam. You can tell me.”

“You shouldn’t be out here.” Another crest creates a rush of foam between us and she stumbles. Instinctively, I place my arm around her waist to steady her. “You should go inside.”

“But the saltwater feels so good on my swollen feet. Don’t deny me this one small comfort. It’s not easy being a pregnant bride-to-be.” She looks at me from beneath her eyelashes, a hint of mischief in her gaze as she pokes me in the ribs. “No thanks to you.”

“Funny, I thought you came out here to talk about Katie, not flirt with me.” I offer my hand to guide her back to shore, but she declines, hiking her skirt above her knees. If Kelly thinks she’s going to seduce me, it’s not going to work. Not this time.

“By all means, let’s talk about my sweet little cousin.” Kelly trudges out of the surf and onto the beach, waiting for me to follow her. Once on dry land, she affixes me with a knowing smile. “You seemed quite captivated by her this morning. I’ve never seen you look at a girl like that. What was it, Adam? Love at first sight?”

“Something you obviously know nothing about,” I retort, unable to hide that she’s struck a chord.

“I know more than you think.” She winks at me and I turn away, digging my toes into the sand. “But it was more than that. You looked like you saw a ghost or something.”

“She reminded me of someone. That’s all.” I’m certainly not going to divulge anything in front of Kelly. I’d rather talk to Katie about it the next time we’re alone.

“Not that tragic accident victim, I hope.” My eyes collide with hers and she smirks. “They bear a striking resemblance to each other, don’t you think? I remember being at your place back in February, and I couldn’t help but notice the sketch you drew next to your bed with the obituary pinned to the corner. When I saw your rendering of her face, it immediately reminded me of my cousin. I can see how you could get caught up in something like that.”

“You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, so I’d stop right there if I were you.” But instead of being taken aback by my menacing tone, Kelly appears triumphant, patting me on the shoulder as if to soothe me.

“When you’re under a lot of stress, the mind plays tricks on you. It allows you to see what you want to see. You know I have a Ph.D. in Psychology. Give me some credit. Whether you want to admit it or not, I’m somewhat of an expert in these matters, and you’re certainly an interesting case.” I recoil from her touch, shoving my feet backward through the sand. I’m not some science experiment, damn it. I’m a human being.

“So now you’re saying I’m crazy?” I’m almost blinded by my anger. She’s really unbelievable.

“No, but I think you’re harboring some survivor’s guilt that was never properly dealt with. Have you talked to anyone since the accident?” Too bad I’m not in the mood for her professional critique.

“Even if I did, it’s none of your business, Kelly.” The wind picks up, whipping my shirt against my back, only adding to my annoyance.

“I’m just concerned about you, Adam. You’re acting funny.” How dare she judge me! Where does she get off?

“Oh, and getting drunk and jumping into my bed counts as responsible behavior?” I snap as she takes a step forward, but I hold my ground.

“We’re two consenting adults who were mutually attracted to each other.” She draws my hands onto her stomach. “We created something wonderful, Adam.” I tremble as my fingers come to rest on her chiffon-covered baby bump. “I don’t feel guilty that it happened, and neither should you.”

“Regardless of the people we hurt by our actions?” I start to draw my hands away but she grabs my wrists, securing them against her. “Especially what we did to Brian?”

“Think of it more as a beneficial exchange. Without this baby being yours, Brian would never have asked me to marry him, and through our wedding, my cousin entered your life.” The hair on the back of my arms stands on end at how neatly everything seems to be falling into place, like fate was instrumental in designing some master plan.

“More like reentered my life,” I grumble as I feel the baby kick for the first time. “Did you feel that?”

“Of course I did, silly. I’ve been his punching bag for quite a while now.” I can’t take my hands off of her now even if I wanted to.

“Did you say his? Is it a boy, Kelly?” I’m growing more attached by the minute, and in this case, that’s not a good thing.

“Yes, Adam. You’re going to have a son.” She beams up at me and I can’t resist smiling back—until reality closes in on me.

“You mean Brian’s going to have a son.” Her frown appears almost immediately as she strokes my knuckles. “I’ll only ever be an uncle to him. That’s the deal, right?”

“I’m afraid it is. Brian won’t have it any other way.” Her words are tight, like she doesn’t necessarily agree with his decision. “Our baby can never know you’re his real father.”

“This is going to be harder to walk away from than I thought. At first, I was glad that Brian was going to pick up the slack, but now that I’m here, now that I’ve felt him…I wish things could be different. Maybe I wouldn’t have given up so quickly if I had known.” A lump forms in my throat as regret runs through me. What if I’m making the biggest mistake of my life?

“Adam, you can’t even take care of yourself. How could you possibly cope with raising a baby?” Kelly’s being brutally honest, and I probably need to hear it, but it hurts. It really does.

“But I’m doing a lot better now.” I try to plead my case, but she’s not buying it.

“You think my cousin is some dead girl.” She shakes her head. She doesn’t believe in me. She never did. “And I don’t know what happened to Jada’s face or why your boss gave the two of you so much time off…”

“I have it all under control, all right?” She doesn’t know what’s been going on in my life. Only Jada knows all of the details. “Everything’s cool.”

“Then why don’t I believe you?” She steps back and my hands slip off her stomach, leaving me with nothing to hold on to. “I think it all worked out for the best.” She levels me with her eyes. “I have all the faith in the world that Brian’s going to be a terrific dad. He’s someone I can depend on. He doesn’t fall apart when things get tough.” She doesn’t have to add ’unlike his brother’ because I can clearly hear the refrain inside my head. She turns on her heel and starts walking up the dunes, the skirt of her maxi dress billowing behind her.

“Kelly, wait,” I call out above the crashing of the waves, but she doesn’t stop. Frustrated, I kick the sand, watching the relentless sea that invaded my nightmares strip me of whatever hope I had left. The sea that carried that helpless man away from me in California, the one that pulled Katie out of my dreams—I hate the sight of it.

Because if Kelly’s cousin isn’t Katie, where do I go from here?