Authors: Merrillee Whren
Elise hugged Lukas, then stepped back. “Was it bad?”
Lukas nodded as he pulled Juliane close and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Taking her hand, he led them toward the chairs lining the wall. His coal-black hair contrasted with Juliane's light brown hair. “I don't know how he survived that crash. His car was practically wrapped around the tree. The whole passenger side was crushed in, and he was trapped in this little space on the driver's side.”
Elise's stomach churned as she listened. Sitting next to Juliane, Elise forced herself to ask the dreaded question that kept resurfacing in her mind. “Is he going to be all right?”
“I wish I could say for certain.” Lukas squeezed Juliane's hand.
With a hint of envy, Elise watched Juliane and Lukas. Elise wished she had someone to hold her hand and comfort her. Still, Elise was happy that her sister had found someone
to love who treated her with kindness and respect. She had thought she'd found someone like that in Seth, but she'd been wrong. After the way he'd abandoned his child, she'd found herself second-guessing everything, wondering if anything he'd promised her, even his love, was real and lasting.
Answers hadn't come, no matter how many nights she lay awake wondering. Seth, who had left the ship shortly after their fight for a family emergency that she now knew was about his father, hadn't been there to offer any explanations or assurances, leaving her prey to the worst of her doubts and insecurities. By the time she left the cruise ship herself, she'd been convinced that Seth had never really loved her and had tried to close her heart off to him in turn. As she sat in the waiting room, desperate for news, she started to wonder if her feelings hadn't changed as much as she'd thought.
Elise leaned forward to look at Lukas, who sat on the other side of Juliane. “Mom said they expected Seth to be in surgery for several hours. How long has it been?”
Lukas glanced at his watch. “A couple of hours at least.”
A helpless feeling washed over Elise. “Is that good or bad?”
“You're asking me stuff I can't begin to answer.”
Elise gave Lukas a halfhearted smile. “I'm sorry. I wish someone could tell us what's going on.”
“We'll probably have to wait until they're done with the surgery to know how he is.” Juliane patted Elise's arm.
Elise released a heavy sigh. “I know, but I hate this waiting.”
“You want to go to the cafeteria and get something to eat?” Lukas asked.
Elise shook her head. “If we leave, we might miss the doctor.”
Lukas stood. “Do you want me to go and bring something back for you?”
“Thanks. That would be great, sweetheart.” Juliane smiled up at him.
After Lukas took their orders and left, Elise paced back and forth. She stopped and glanced out the window at the rain-soaked landscape. Her mom had said something about Seth's car skidding on the rain-slick road. Elise shuddered at the thought.
Even the colorful parade of daffodils and crocuses that filled the flowerbeds near the hospital entrance couldn't brighten Elise's thoughts. The gray April day captured her mood.
While Elise paced in front of the window, Juliane walked over and gently took hold of her arm to pull her to a stop. “You know pacing and worrying aren't going to change anything.”
Elise stopped and looked at her sister. “I have to walk off my nerves.”
“For someone who said she never wanted to see Seth again, you seem awfully worried about him.”
“I'm not sure what I'm feeling.” Elise sank onto a nearby chair. “I loved him, so I don't want anything awful to happen to him, especially since he has that sweet little girl. She obviously adores him.”
“And what about you?”
Elise didn't want to examine her feelings or answer her sister's question. Did love for Seth still occupy her heart? She pushed that thought away. “Didn't we have this conversation once before?”
“Yeah, but I still have questions.”
“And I don't have any answers.”
“Humor me.”
Elise looked down the hallway. Where was Lukas? His return would rescue her from Juliane's curiosity. “There's not much humor in this story.”
“Just answer this. Did you ever learn the truth about Olivia's mother?”
“Not the entire story.” Elise stared out the window again. “I told you before that he said that the woman just wanted money, that Olivia wasn't his, even though I could clearly see that she looked just like him, even then. But his behavior killed a little part of my heart and my feelings for him.”
“So you dumped him right then?”
“Yes. I still had thirty days left on my contract with the cruise line, or I would have left that day. It about killed me to think about being on the same ship with Seth for another month. As the cruise director, his presence would have been hard to avoid. But he left just a few days later when he got word about his father. All the same, I barely got through the month.”
“That's why you looked so awful when you returned home.”
“Oh, thanks.”
“You know what I mean. You were so thin.”
“Well, I'm back to my normal weight now, and life here is good. I don't want Seth Finley's presence in town to change that. But what kind of person would I be if I ignored Seth while he was in dire straits? My actions wouldn't be any better than his, when he ignored Olivia's mother. Even if it's hard for me, I've got to do what I know to be the right thing.”
Juliane leaned over and put an arm around Elise's shoulders. “Remember, I'm here for you anytime you need someone to talk to.”
“I know. That's been one of the great things about coming back home.”
“I agree. You managed to help me keep my head when I was dealing with Lukas. Maybe I can do the same for you while you're working through this.” Juliane glanced down the hallway. “Here comes Lukas with the food.”
“Good. My stomach's beginning to rumble.” But even as she made the statement, Elise wondered whether she would be able to eat.
After Lukas passed out the food, they ate in silence, and Elise replayed her conversation with Juliane. Elise was glad they'd talked, but she wasn't sure even Juliane's counsel would get her through her confusion over Seth. And when was someone going to tell them what was happening with him?
T
ime dragged. Elise paced. Her mind buzzed. When she thought she couldn't stand another minute of the waiting, she saw her father and Seth's mother, Maggie Finley, hurrying down the hallway. She looked the same as the last time Elise had seen her about two years ago.
Maggie's trim figure and dark brown hair belied her age, but her ashen and haggard expression spelled out her worry. Elise wondered what she could possibly say to Seth's mother. Did she know how their relationship had ended? No matter. This wasn't the time to think about herself.
Ray hugged his daughters, then glanced around the waiting area. “Still no word?”
Lukas stepped forward. “We haven't heard a thing and have to assume Seth is still in surgery.”
Maggie sank onto a nearby chair. “Can't we ask someone?”
“Let me check.” Ray strode back down the hallway.
Maggie turned her attention to Elise. “Hello, Elise.”
“Hi, Mrs. Finley.” Taking a seat in a nearby chair, Elise tried to pull up a smile. “I can't believe this has happened to Seth. We've been praying for him.”
“Thank you. I appreciate it.” Maggie shook her head. “I can't believe this has happened, either.”
Before Elise could respond, Ray returned with Barbara, who carried Olivia. Nathan, Pastor Tom and Pastor Rob, the senior minister, accompanied them.
“Olivia.” Maggie jumped up and raced to greet her granddaughter. She reached out for the child and hugged her as the little girl went eagerly into Maggie's arms. “Grandma's so glad to see you.”
“Gramma.” Olivia put her arms around Maggie's neck.
The scene touched Elise's heart. She tried to put herself in Maggie's place. She had to be anxious about her son's condition but thankful that her grandchild hadn't been in harm's way. Elise recalled how Seth mentioned that his mother wasn't thrilled with his move. How would she view this latest development? What would happen now?
While Elise pondered the future, her dad took charge and introduced Maggie to everyone. After he made the last introduction, Pastor Rob led the group in a prayer for Seth. When the prayer was over, the group fell silent except for Olivia. She began crying for Seth.
Maggie took a seat again and tried to comfort the child. “Olivia, honey, you can't see your daddy right now because the doctors are fixing his boo-boos.”
“He has boo-boo?
Nodding, Maggie held Olivia close. “We have to wait till he's better to see him.”
The scene tore Elise up inside. Remembering Seth's interaction with his daughter during dinner the previous evening, Elise prayed Seth would be all right for the sake of his little girl. She needed her daddy. Even as Elise thought about Seth's recovery, she couldn't help wondering about Olivia's mother. What had happened to her?
While Elise tried to make sense of why Seth now had the
child he'd rejected, she remained quiet as everyone talked around her. She had a difficult time focusing on any of the conversations. Her thoughts centered on Seth, in spite of herself.
Barbara's brow knit in a frown as she talked to Maggie. “Where are you planning to stay?”
“I suppose in the hotel where Seth was staying.” Maggie shrugged.
Barbara laid a hand on one of Maggie's arms. “We can't have you staying out there. Now that Elise and Juliane are gone from home, Ray and I are rattling around in our big old house. We have plenty of room, and it'll be so much better for you to stay with us, especially since you have Olivia with you.”
“Oh, we couldn't impose on you. You barely know us.”
“No problem. We'll get to know you.” Barbara reached for her purse and pulled out a pen and paper. “I'll give you our phone number.”
“Butâ”
“I won't take no for an answer.”
“If you insist.”
Ray walked over. “I can take you to the hotel so you can get Olivia's and Seth's things.”
“You folks are being too kind.” Maggie smiled even while unshed tears sparkled in her eyes.
Elise took in the scene with a pinprick of dread. She was proud of her parents' generosity but worried that her mother's hospitality would mean more association with Seth. As she tried to squash the self-absorbed thought, she caught movement out of the corner of her eye. Looking in that direction, she spied Bill Daubenmire, an orthopedic surgeon, who was a member of their church.
Still dressed in his scrubs, the tall, dark-haired doctor approached them. Her heart racing, she gripped the arms of
her chair in order to keep from rocketing out of it and demanding answers from him. She tried to read his expression, but it told her nothing.
“Dr. Daubenmire.” Ray motioned toward Maggie. “This is Seth Finley's mother, Maggie.”
Still holding Olivia, Maggie shook the doctor's hand. “Doctor, what can you tell me about Seth?”
The doctor's expression brightened, and a slight smile curved his mouth. “Mrs. Finley, Seth's in recovery, and his prognosis is guardedly optimistic.”
Maggie patted Olivia's back. “When can I see him?”
“Soon. I'll have one of the nurses let you know when he's out of recovery.” Dr. Daubenmire motioned down the hallway. “He'll be in ICU for at least forty-eight hours, then, hopefully, we can move him to a regular room.”
“Do you know how long he'll be in the hospital?” Maggie asked.
“Since he's a relatively young man, I expect him to recover fairly fast, but I don't want to make any predictions at this point.” Dr. Daubenmire looked over the group, then back at Maggie. “If you'd like, I can tell you exactly what we did today during surgery.”
Maggie nodded. “Please. I would appreciate that.”
“Okay.” Dr. Daubenmire nodded. “We can talk while we head toward the ICU.”
“I'll take Olivia for you.” Barbara held out her arms for the little girl.
“Thank you.” Maggie hugged Olivia. “Grandma's going to leave you with Miss Barbara for a few minutes, okay?”
“'Kay.” Olivia bobbed her little head.
“I'll be back very soon.” Maggie placed Olivia in Barbara's open arms, then waved as she left with Dr. Daubenmire.
Elise marveled at the way her mother had been able to befriend Olivia in such a short time. Elise could see her mother
growing attached to the child already. That attachment didn't have to involve Elise, but she feared it would.
Elise looked down and saw the white-knuckled grip she still had on the arm of the chair. Releasing a slow breath, she loosened her hold and eased back in the chair. Seth was going to be okay.
While the conflicting emotions battled in Elise's heart and mind, she tried to put the whole thing into perspective. Only a day ago she'd raged against the idea of seeing Seth. She'd wanted nothing to do with him. Now she wanted nothing more than to see him. How was that possible?
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Machines, tubes and wires surrounded Seth as he lay on the hospital bed, thankful to be alive. He could move his fingers and his toes. He wasn't sure about the rest of his body parts, but the fingers and toes gave him hope for the rest.
The nurses told him he was doing fine, but the pain medication was making him a little groggy. He had a vague memory of the doctor telling him about the surgery to mend his broken leg and other injuries. Events surrounding the accident flitted in and out of his mind. He couldn't seem to focus on any of them. He mostly remembered Ray Keller encouraging him and praying while the rescue team worked to extract him from the wreckage. He closed his eyes and thanked God for sparing his life for Olivia's sake. He wanted to live for that little girl. “Seth.”
At the sound of the soft female voice, Seth opened his eyes. His mother stood beside his bed. “Hi, Mom.”
Tears shimmering in her eyes, she stared at him. “How are you?”
“Alive.”
“Thank the Lord for that.” She reached for his hand and
squeezed it. “I can't believe this happened to you. I caught a plane as soon as I got the call.”
“Where's Olivia?”
“She's out in the waiting area with the Kellers.”
“Why didn't you bring her to see me?”
Maggie waved a hand toward the bed. “I didn't want her to see you like this.”
“Do I look that bad?”
“What do you think?”
“I don't have any idea how I look.” Seth slowly shook his head.
“Well, you look like you've been in a terrible accident. Besides, I don't think Olivia would understand all the tubes and wires.” Maggie patted his arm. “I wouldn't want to scare her.”
Closing his eyes, Seth nodded his head. “I suppose you're right.”
“I'm hoping she can see you when you are transferred to a regular room.”
Seth opened his eyes. “Did the doctor say when that would be?”
“He hoped forty-eight hours. Didn't he tell you?”
“Maybe. I've been very groggy. It hurts to think.”
“Don't think.” Maggie patted his arm again. “Would you like to see Elise?”
“She's here?”
Maggie nodded. “She's out in the waiting room with her family.”
Seth let that information drift through his fuzzy brain. Despite Elise's less than enthusiastic reception at her parents' house, she was here. Could that possibly mean she cared for him, at least a little? “Does she want to see me?”
“She's here, isn't she? If she didn't want to see you, I doubt she'd be here.”
Seth tried to smile. “I don't want to scare her.”
“I think she's old enough to handle seeing your injuries.” Maggie returned his smile. “It's good to see you still have your sense of humor.”
“Don't make her come to see me if she doesn't want to.”
“I don't think you have to worry about that.”
“Are you sure?” Seth wanted to believe his mother, but he kept remembering Elise's reaction at dinner the previous evening.
“You know I wasn't for this move, but after seeing the caring way people have reacted to your accident, I realize I was wrong.” Maggie gave Seth's hand another squeeze. “The doctor said we had to limit our visitation time, so I'll go get Elise.”
Seth watched his mother leave, then closed his eyes.
When he blinked his eyes open a little while later, Seth wondered whether he was dreaming or whether the woman staring out the window as she sat on the nearby chair was just a painkiller-induced mirage.
He squeezed his eyes shut, then opened them. She was still there. “Elise?”
She turned and looked at him. “Seth, you're awake.”
“Yeah.” He tried to smile, but even that simple motion brought discomfort. “How long have you been here?”
She stood but didn't come closer to the bed. Her shoulders rigid, she appeared ill at ease. “A few minutes. Your mom said I could see you.”
“I must've drifted off. It's hard to keep my eyes open.” He wondered how bad he looked. Was that why she appeared so uncomfortable, or did being with him make her uncomfortable?
“I didn't want to disturb you.” Elise took a step closer to the bed.
Seth closed his eyes for a moment and pushed away his
earlier negative thoughts. He let Elise's presence fill him with hope. God did answer prayers, but Seth knew he still needed to practice caution. Elise had always been a compassionate person. That was part of what had drawn him to her. And it was part of why he'd lost her. She couldn't tolerate the way he'd treated Olivia's mother. True, he'd felt justified at the time. He'd been surprised when Sophie had first contacted him, telling him that their last time together before their breakup had resulted in pregnancy, but he'd been willing to take responsibility. Clearly there was no room in his life for a baby just then, but he could help financially and figure out a way to be a part of his child's life.
He'd been thrown when Sophie had insisted that money was all he'd need to provide. But then he'd learned that she'd found a new boyfriend and had told
him
that he was the baby's father. Furious at the way she'd tried to use him, Seth had cut off all communication with Sophie, until that day in Key West. It wasn't until he became a Christian that Seth realized how badly he'd behaved then, and how he'd let his anger push him to act so disdainfully in dismissing Sophie and Olivia. Now he had to pray that Elise would believe he'd changed.
“Thanks for coming.”
“I can't stay long.” She took another step closer. “You were in surgery a long time. Nearly four hours. Dad told us how they had to cut you out of the car.” Elise swallowed hard.
Seth wished he knew what she was thinking, but maybe he didn't want to know. “Your dad helped me hang on. I don't remember much except your dad praying.”
“I'm so sorry you had this accident, but I'm glad he could help.” Elise crossed her arms over her midsection, appearing ill at ease again.
“Did you see Olivia?”
Elise nodded. “She's with your mom now, but she was asking for you.”
“I wish I could see her, but it probably wouldn't be a very good idea right now.” Seth's heart swelled with love for his little girl. He wondered whether Elise could ever share that feeling.
“I think you're right. You're kind of banged up.”
Seth smiled wryly. “Thanks.”
Elise hunched her shoulders. “I didn't mean to insult you.”
Seth couldn't help laughing even though it hurt. “No insult taken.”
“Guess I'd better leave, so you can get some rest.” She turned to go.
Seth tried to sit up, but he barely had the strength. He didn't want her to go. If only she would stay. If only she could care for him again. “Elise⦔
Stopping, she turned back. “I hope you recover soon. I'll be praying for you.”
He watched her walk away without a backward glance.