Holding On (56 page)

Once we made it back to the bed, I told him that his parents
were
on
their
way.
I
also
told
him
that
Ethan
was
in
the
waiting
room.
I expected
his
face
to
show
some
sort
of
discomfort,
but
it
didn’t.
His smile widened, and he wrapped his hands around
mine.

“I’m
so
happy
for
you.
I
knew
that
I
was
leaving
you
in
good hands.” Brad
said.

His words brought tears to my eyes again, and I was surprised
that I still had any left after how many I had shed the last few
days.

“I
am
in
good
hands,”
I
replied
firmly.
I
was
smiling
now
too
as the
tears
made
their
way
to
my
chin,
and
one
dropped
on
our
hands that
were
still
locked
together,
holding
on
as
if
we
feared
something
would
tear
us
apart
again.
“We’re
going
to
head
to
my
dad’s
so
that
I
can change and
shower,
but then we’ll be
back.”

“You
sound
like
you
need
a
nap
too.
Why
don’t
you
rest
and
eat something—I
know
you
haven’t—then
come
back
if
you
want.
I’m probably
not
going
to
be
released
for
at
least
another
couple
of
days depending on how I feel. The doctor wants to observe
me.”

“I can go without a nap. Do you want me to bring you
something
to
eat?”

He
stared
at
me
with
his
“I
know
you
better
than
that”
look
and waited
for
me
to
tell
him
the
truth.
I
was
not
going
to
back
down
this time.

“The nurses told me that you’ve been here almost as long as I
have and
that
you
refused
to
leave
my
side.
I
want
you
to
get
something
to
eat and don’t come back until you do.” His voice was stern, but you
could hear the concern as well. He sounded like his father had on the
phone when
we
were
talking
about
keeping
the
details
of
the
accident
from him. “If you think you can stay awake, fine, but I still think you
should take a nap
too.”

“Fine.”
I
was
grumbling,
but
I
was
smiling
at
the
same
time.
He
was still trying to take care of me when he was the one who needed
it right
now.

“Go.
My
parents
will
be
here
soon,
and
you
need
to
get
out
of
here. I’ll still be here when you get back.
Promise.”

We
said
our
good-byes.
I
tried
not
to
get
emotional
but
failed miserably. I was sobbing like a baby by the time I reached Ethan in
the waiting
room.
He
stood
and
brought
me
to
his
chest
in
a
big
hug.
We
must have stood there for a few minutes because when I heard
Mike’s
voice
behind
me,
I
realized
that
I
was
being
held
up
by
Ethan.
Had
I fallen asleep in his
arms?

I introduced Ethan to
Brad’s
parents, and we excused ourselves
to leave. Before we could go,
Brad’s
mom pulled me aside into a
tight hug. I thought she was never going to let go until I heard her
mumble her thanks in my ear and pulled back with tears in her eyes. I
watched
them walk toward
Brad’s
room hand in hand and realized what a
sense
of
relief
they
must
feel
right
now.
What
I
was
feeling
was
nothing compared to what they must be feeling, knowing that they had not
lost their child after
all.

I helped Ethan navigate to my
dad’s
house. Giving him
directions was
about
the
only
thing
keeping
me
awake
at
that
point.
We
passed the
road
to
Brad’s,
and
I
shed
a
tear.
We
passed
the
high
school,
and
I shed another. When we drove right past my
dad’s
house, I regained
my composure and turned us
around.

One
hot
shower
later
and
I
was
ready
for
a
nap.
When
I
walked
downstairs, I found my dad and Ethan in the kitchen cooking
me breakfast, even though it was well past lunch time. They forced me
to eat everything on my plate, and then Ethan carried me up to my
room, dropped me on my bed, and tucked me in. He promised to wake me
up in a few hours so that we could go back up to the hospital. I closed
my eyes and was asleep before I heard the door
close.

I awoke with a start.
Visions
of
Brad’s
totaled car running
through my mind. The television had shown the aftermath of the accident. I couldn’t seem to get rid of that visual. I was extremely grateful that
he was
alive
and
healing,
but
I
was
still
scared
that
I
was
going
to
lose
him. I
heard
the
door
open,
and
Ethan
walked
in.
It
was
dark
outside,
and I had slept longer than I had intended to. He had promised to wake
me up. Why hadn’t
he?

“Are
you
okay?”
Ethan
asked.
His
voice
was
barely
above
a
whisper as he sat down on the bed next to me.

“Yeah.
Fine.
Let
me
change,
and
we
can
go
back
up
to
the
hospital,” I said. I was talking faster than normal and I could still feel the
rapids beat of my
heart.

“Becca,
it’s
two in the morning. Why don’t you go back to sleep, and we’ll head up there first thing
tomorrow?”

“What?” I was wide awake now and screaming. “Why did you let me sleep that long?
You
promised to wake me
up!”

“I tried, gorgeous.” He was still whispering and being that it
was
2:00 a.m. I realized why
now.
“I had to check for a pulse to make
sure
you were still alive.
You
wouldn’t wake up, so we decided to let
you sleep and face the consequences later.” He was giving me the look
that says he was facing those consequences right
now.

I pulled back the covers and scooted
over.
The look he was giving me said that he was uncomfortable with this, but he crawled in
anyway.
I
cuddled
up
to
his
chest
and
felt
his
hand
rubbing
up
and
down
my back, staying as far away from the bottom hem of my shirt as
possible. One touch of bare skin and we were both
goners.

I
woke
up
in
Ethan’s
arms,
and
a
small
smile
crept
across
my face.
He
was
already
awake
and
was
staring
deep
into
my
eyes.
I
felt completely
refreshed,
and
I
was
ready
to
go
back
to
the
hospital
until Ethan leaned down and kissed me. Now all I wanted to do was rip
his clothes off and stay in bed all
day.

Before
things
could
even
begin
to
progress,
I
heard
my
dad
clear
his throat
and
looked
up
to
see
him
standing
in
the
doorway,
watching
us.
I could feel the heat creeping up my cheeks and had to look
away.
Ethan quickly kissed my forehead and pulled the covers back to show my
dad that we were both fully
dressed.

After another amazing shower and a quick breakfast, Ethan and
I headed
back
up
to
the
hospital.
I
had
spoken
with
my
mom
that
morning to
let
her
know
he
was
awake.
She
was
thrilled
but
wanted
to
know when she should book my ticket home. I hadn’t even thought about it. I knew that I had missed my first few days of college classes and that I missed practice. I would start school on
Tuesday,
so I needed to
head back before then. What about Ethan? He was missing class right
now.

After
hanging
up
with
my
mom,
deciding
that
I
would
catch
a
flight home
on
Sunday,
I
turned
to
Ethan
and
asked
him
about
school.
The
last thing I wanted to do was put his scholarship in
jeopardy.

“I talked to all my professors Monday and explained the
situation. I
talked
to
yours
too
and
our
coaches.
We
are
excused
for
this
week. Everyone
expects
us
to
be
back
on
Tuesday.
My
flight
leaves
Sunday morning.
Your
mom
will
probably
try
to
get
you
on
my
flight.
She knows which one it
is.”

I
was
taking
in
everything
he
was
saying.
He
took
care
of
it.
Without being
asked,
he
took
care
of
everything
for
me.
Then
he
flew
out
here
to be with me. I didn’t even know that I needed him until he was here,
but he knew that I would need
him.

“Thank
you”
just
didn’t
seem
like
enough.
“I
love
you
so
much.
You
know that,
right?”

“Of course. I love you too,
gorgeous.”

We
drove the rest of the way to the hospital in silence, aside
from me
giving
him
directions
when
he
needed
them.
Walking
out
of
the elevator,
I
could
see
that
some
of
our
friends
had
gathered
in
the
waiting room to see Brad. I was not planning on waiting,
though.

I gave them a smile and a wave and headed straight down the
hall, past the nurses’ station, and into his room. Emma and Ella were
inside when we got there, and both their mouths dropped open when they
saw
Ethan
standing
beside
me.
I
had
talked
about
him
to
Ella,
but
I
had
never really
explained
how
incredibly
sexy
he
was.
Gorgeous,
yes,
but
I
never really mentioned his sex appeal. That was something I wanted to
keep to
myself.

He
was
eye
candy,
and
he
knew
it.
The
looks
he
got
on
a
regular basis never seemed to shock him. I wasn’t usually a possessive
person, but
when
I
felt
the
need
to
remind
people
he
was
with
someone,
I
would
always
find
a
way
to
touch
him.
I
didn’t
feel
that
need
now
as
two
of
my best friends ogled him for a brief moment before collecting
themselves. I
gave
Brad
a
big
hug
and
then
introduced
Ethan
to
Emma
and
Ella.

They
managed
to
shake
his
hand
and
say
hello
without
drooling
on
him. I knew they were embarrassed when they wouldn’t look at me and
said
good-bye before quickly exiting the room, leaving just me, Ethan,
and Brad in awkward
silence.

Ethan
said
hello
and
pulled
Brad
into
a
man
hug,
breaking
the lingering
silence
between
the
three
of
us.
I
sat
down
on
the
bed
next to him, and Ethan pulled a chair up beside me, resting his hand on
my thigh. Who was being possessive
now?

“I
missed
you
last
night.”
He
turned
his
attention
from
me
to
Ethan and asked, “Couldn’t wake her up, could
you?”

They
both
laughed,
and
I
smacked
them
each
in
the
chest,
Brad lighter
than
Ethan.
“She
was
dead
to
the
world.
I
even
checked
for
a pulse.” As soon as he stopped speaking, he knew the words he
had chosen were wrong.
“Sorry,
man, I didn’t mean it like that. I
just—”

“Its
fine,”
Brad
interrupted.
“She
has
always
slept
like
the
dead when
she’s
overdoing it. I know you didn’t mean anything by
it.”