Holding On (12 page)

It’s
finally
the
first
day
of
school.
This
sucks.
I
arrived
early,
and the
parking
lot
was
still
pretty
empty.
I
trudged
up
the
stairs
to
the building marked Administration and opened the heavy double doors. I
walked
into
the
first
office
to
find
an
elderly
lady
sitting
behind
the counter,
with
her
head
buried
in
a
pile
of
paperwork.
I
cleared
my
throat to let her know I was there, and without looking up, she told me she’d be right with
me.

I
took
a
seat
in
one
of
the
plastic
chairs
by
the
wall
and
waited.
After
about
five
minutes,
I
saw
another
elderly
lady
walk
in,
and
she smiled at me. I took that as an invitation to
speak.

“Hi!
My
name
is
Rebecca
Blake,
and
I
need
to
get
my
schedule.
My
mom
registered
me
last
week
sometime
and
was
told
that
I
could
stop
in this morning and someone would have it for
me.”

“Sure,
sweetheart,
give
me
just
a
minute,”
she
said
with
a
big, sincere smile on her
face.

I walked up to the counter and waited. The first lady still had
her head in a pile of papers and never once glanced at me. I wondered for a moment if she’d fallen asleep since her head was resting on her
hand until
she
glanced
up
at
me.
She
didn’t
smile;
she
just
pretended
like
I was not there and went back to whatever she was doing
before.

“Okay,”
the second lady said, bringing me back from my
thoughts. “I
don’t
have
anyone
here
this
early
to
show
you
around,
but
if
you
want
to wait, I have an office aide during first period and she can help
you.”

“No,
thank
you.
I
should
be
able
to
manage.
I
have
enough
time to
at
least
find
my
locker
and
my
first
few
classes
before
first
period starts,” I
said.

“Well,
that sounds like a good plan. It looks like your first class
is in
the
farthest
building,
second
floor.
If
you
want
to
find
the
rest
of
your classes
first,
that
should
help
you
make
it
there
on
time.
Good
luck, Rebecca,
and
welcome
to
Tucson.”
Her
smile
was
still
sincere,
and
I wondered
how
the
two
old
ladies
got
along,
being
that
their
personalities were completely opposite from one
another.

I smiled and exited the office. Once outside, I decided to take
her advice. I should be able to find my first four classes before the bell
for first
period
rings.
At
lunch,
I’d
find
my
last
three
classes,
and
that
way
I would be able to avoid sitting alone. I’d never eaten lunch alone, and
I couldn’t imagine how awkward that would
be.

As
large
as
the
campus
was,
I
felt
pretty
confident
in
finding
my way
around.
I
remembered
the
building
letters
from
my
self-guided
tour, and I found my locker with ease. Once I got it open, I started to
unload all my crap into it. I put everything in there but my class schedule
and a notebook. I slid my new phone in the front pocket of my jeans
after turning it on
Vibrate
and head off to find my
classes.

The
first
few
classes
were
easy
to
find,
and
once
I
heard
the
first bell,
I
sprinted
to
my
first-period
class.
I
walked
into
the
room
and
up
to the
teacher.
I
could
feel
everyone’s
eyes
on
me,
wondering
who
I
was.
It was something I’d gotten used to since
it’s
been happening for the
past twenty minutes. As large as the school was, with as many students as
it could
have,
you
would
think
that
one
new
person
would
be
hard
to
miss. I
was
sure
that
I
would
be
able
to
stay
in
the
shadows
for
a
few
weeks.
I wanted to blend in, not stand
out.

I
was
given
a
textbook
for
physics
and
was
told
to
grab
an
available seat.
I
chose
to
sit
at
the
front
of
the
room,
hopefully
away
from
anyone who
wanted
to
strike
up
a
conversation.
I
was
not
feeling
especially friendly.
I
was
nervous,
and
more
than
anything,
I
felt
completely
alone.

As
I
took
my
seat, the
last
bell
rings,
and
a
few
stragglers
slid
into
class.  I could feel my cell phone vibrate in my pocket,   and I resisted
the urge
to
take
it
out
and
check
my
messages.
I
hadn’t
spoken
to
any
of
my friends since Thursday. I sent a mass email about my phone
“breaking” and then a mass text with my new number when I replaced my
phone Saturday
morning. I
was
surprised
that
I
didn’t
receive
any
calls
last night, or even a text, from any of my friends.

I
know
that
all
my
friends
went
back
to
class
today
without
me,
and the
thought
alone
broke
my
heart
a
little.
I
wondered
what
they
were
doing right
now.
With
the time change, they were probably at lunch.
I wondered who was texting me. As the last thought crossed my mind,
I was pulled from my own little world into the land of the unknown
and the start of my physics
class.

During lunch, I made it a point to find my last three classes. I
took my time wandering around the campus. I found the library and spent
a few
minutes
checking
it
out.
By
the
time
I
had
accomplished
everything I needed to, I only had about five minutes before the end of lunch, so
I decided to head to my fifth period
class.

I
was
the
first
to
arrive,
and
thankfully,
the
teacher
was
already there.
I
was
given
a
history
book
and
found
my
seat,
opening
it
up
to avoid
eye
contact
with
anyone.
Blend
in!
Blend
in!
It
worked
for
the
first few minutes until I felt someone tap me on the shoulder from behind.
I turned to find an average-looking, tall and incredibly-built-looking
guy in the seat behind me. He asked to borrow a pencil, and I handed
him the
one
I
had
in
my
hand
before
turning
back
around
without
saying
anything at all.
Awkward!