Heavy Metal (A Badboy Rockstar Romance) (21 page)

As it turned out, Brandon hadn’t gotten us a room at the hotel we had previously stayed at. 

He had gotten us an entire suite instead.  It was beautiful, decorated in shades of muted beige and off white.  There were fresh flowers everywhere and we had a brilliant view of the stars from our private balcony.

I couldn’t believe it was all for me.

Of course, Mittens managed to knock over a vase of roses pretty much straight away.  Cat curiosity at its finest!  Amidst chuckles, Brandon cleaned up the mess while I “kitty proofed” the smaller of the two sitting areas.  It basically meant removing anything that could be destroyed by an inquisitive and occasionally clumsy feline. 

I also set out some water and made a makeshift litter box – which I desperately hoped the cat would actually use!  Once I was satisfied the room was fit for a king, I decided it was time to introduce King Mittens to his new, temporary palace.

When I went back into the main sitting room, Brandon was cradling Mittens in his arms while the whiskered little critter purred like crazy.  It was a far cry from the way Mittens had interacted with Carl.  And there was something really sexy about watching the tough, bad boy rocker – the same guy who had
burned a building down for me
– be sweet with a cat.

Watching my boyfriend cuddle my cat was the most adorable, heartwarming thing ever.  For a moment I just stood there silently with a smile on my face, not wanting to interrupt.  When Brandon looked over and saw me there, he smiled too. 

“Is the room ready for the cat?” he asked as Mittens head butted his chin.

“It’s as ready as it will ever be,” I replied. 

“I ordered some room service for all three of us while you were in there,” Brandon informed me.  “I hope you don’t mind but I figured after the day you’ve had maybe staying in is exactly what you need.  I’ll take you out tomorrow night, anywhere you like.”

“That sounds perfect,” I said, glad that Brandon had realized I really didn’t feel like being wined and dined at a fancy restaurant tonight.  Then I raised an eyebrow.  “You seriously ordered room service for a cat?” I demanded, unable to believe it.

“Sure did.  He has to eat,” Brandon pointed out sensibly.

Mittens had turned up at my mother’s house as a stray, underweight and clearly starved for social interaction.  I had taken good care of him, nursing him back to health until he bulked up and giving him plenty of cuddles.  But never in my wildest dreams had I imagined ordering the former stray room service at a swanky hotel!

Then again, a lot of unexpected things had happened to me.  Most shocking of all was that I was dating a rich and famous musician who treated me like a million bucks.  He accepted and loved me for exactly who I was, and slowly but surely I was learning to accept and love myself. 

Brandon had changed my whole life, and I was a better woman because of him.

Together, we took the cat into the sitting room.  When Brandon set him down, Mittens gave the room a once over and then curled up on the couch for a nap.  Apparently we weren’t the only ones who were worn out from the day’s excitement!  Satisfied that the cat would be fine, we shut the door and went back into the larger, more elegant sitting room.

We sat down on a loveseat in front of the fire.  Over to our left, we could see the sky full of stars.  It was beautiful.  Brandon pulled my feet up onto his lap, his hand casually draped over my ankle.  “So,” he said with a smile, “I’m wondering how you feel about Maine?”

“Maine?” I asked, confused.  “I’ve never been there.  Why?”

“Well I bought some land there, in a really rural area,” Brandon explained.  “I was thinking of having a little cottage built there, if you think that’s a good idea.  I think Mittens might like it there.  I haven’t made any final decisions yet – I want your input on those – but one thing I do know is that the place will have pink shutters on the windows.”

My eyes widened.  Brandon had not only remembered my silly little dream about living in a cottage with pink shutters – he was also going to make it a reality!  He was truly incredible, and my eyes brimmed with tears.

“Hey.  What’s the matter?” he asked.

“Nothing,” I told him, smiling through my tears.  “Nothing is the matter.  It’s just...I never imagined I could ever have the things I wanted.  I thought my dreams were just that – dreams.  I didn’t expect them to come true.”

“Well I’m going to make it my mission to make all your dreams come true,” Brandon told me.  “Nothing would make me happier.”

“So what happens now?” I asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you have to go back on tour right away?” I asked, desperately hoping that wasn’t the case. 

I still needed to sort out the issue of my missing passport, so if he was headed back out of the country, chances were I would be forced to stay behind.  But more than that, what I craved was normalcy.  I wanted to build a life with the man I knew and loved, not the famous musician girls screamed for.

“The guys and I agreed we’ve been going pretty hard for a really long time,” Brandon told me.  “That’s probably why a couple of them started getting sick toward the end there.  It’s too much.  Our record company doesn’t give a shit – for them, it’s all about profit.  But as a band, we’ve collectively decided to insist on some downtime.”

“So you’re done for a while?” I asked eagerly.

“Almost,” he replied.  “I’ve committed to do a couple of late night talk shows in New York City next week.  It’s easier to just get them over with than cancel and piss off a bunch of people with the power to hurt my career.  So I’m going to go.  Maybe you can come with me?  It will be a quick trip, and after that, it’s just going to be you and me.  I will be all yours and I can’t wait!”

“I’m glad,” I told him.  “I’m really glad.”

“Me too,” he assured me.  “I can’t even tell you how relieved I am to have a break from life on the road – not to mention getting to spend quality time with you!  I have a feeling I might have to compete with Mittens for your attention.  He’s cute and fluffy, so I know I don’t actually have a hope in hell of winning.  But I think I’m okay with that.”

I giggled.  “You have my full attention at the moment.”

“Good.”  Brandon raised his arms above his head in a big stretch and let out a yawn.

“I think I’m ready for bed too,” I told him.

“I packed a bag for you while you were at the diner,” Brandon replied.  “Hopefully I did okay!”

*****

As it turned out, Brandon had done just fine.  All his time spent on the road meant he was pretty adept at packing overnight bags.  He’d remembered all the important stuff:  toothpaste, a hairbrush, deodorant, clean clothes, a nightgown and underwear.  But after I’d put on my nightgown, I decided to skip the underwear.

It was time.

It was time to let go of my past, and time to stop hearing Carl’s voice in my head telling me how disgusting I was.  Brandon loved my body and he loved me.  Though I’d had trouble believing it at first, the lust in his eyes every time he looked at me couldn’t be denied.  He wanted me exactly as I was meant to be.

I had come to accept I would never be skinny.  Sure, I had experienced life as a thin woman for a brief period of time, but it hadn’t been the cake walk I had been expecting.  Not only had I felt weak and dizzy from mistreating and starving my body, but I had also felt a lot more insecure than I had expected. 

Losing weight hadn’t caused my life to suddenly turn into a pile of glitter and rainbows.  No, the only thing that had made me feel good on the inside was learning to love myself.  And now that I finally realized the girl who stared back at me when I looked in the mirror mattered, I found myself coming to like her. 

Sure, she didn’t have washboard abs – but the dimpled skin around her belly was soft and welcoming.  She didn’t have a thigh gap, but she had strong, shapely legs.  She was beautiful in her own unique way, and her curves actually were pretty damn sexy.  She had big, gorgeous breasts and full hips that swayed enticingly when she walked.  Why had I never noticed any of that before?

Most importantly, the woman in the mirror deserved to be treated with respect and kindness.  I only wished I had recognized that years earlier.

But there was no time to dwell on regrets.

All I wanted to focus on now was my future – and the man I intended to spend it with.

It felt so natural. 

As we prepared to go to bed, I felt completely safe and secure, filled with happiness and hope.  We turned down the bed and both of us climbed in, Brandon’s hand inadvertently brushing against mine in the process.  Fireworks went off inside me.  I didn’t just want this...I needed it.  I craved it down to my very core.

Brandon didn’t push me for sex, but I saw the longing in his eyes once we began to kiss.  It heated up quickly, relatively chaste pecks turning into a hormonally charged make out session.  Our hands groped at each other’s bodies.  I didn’t care about anything except how amazing it felt and how badly I wanted to show Brandon I loved him.

It was one thing to say it, but quite another to let actions do the talking.

When I pulled off my nightgown and Brandon saw I was completely naked beneath it, his eyes lit up.  My intentions were clear, and he looked beyond thrilled that we were finally going to go all the way.  His reaction was something that definitely couldn’t be faked – especially when I saw a telltale bulge jutting out of his pajama pants! 

Knowing that I was turning Brandon on gave me the confidence to leave the lights on.  I hadn’t planned on doing that, but it felt right.  It seemed far more personal that way, being able to gaze into each other’s eyes as we made love. 

So, feeling sexy as hell, I helped rid Brandon of his clothes, pausing only to admire how freaking hot his naked body was – wow!

Then, burning up with desire, I pulled him close.  He kissed me fervently before getting on top of me, his hardness pressing into the soft, supple flesh of my thigh.  A tiny moan escaped my mouth as his fingers explored my body gently.  He paid close attention and quickly managed to figure out exactly what I wanted. 

Somehow his highly skilled fingers managed to find all the right spots that drove me wild.  Before long I was barely able to contain my moans, which had grown significantly louder and more needful.

Carl was the only other man I had been with, and he had never shown much interest in my pleasure.  Sex had been all about him getting off.  As I had lain there, often hating myself and feeling ashamed of my body, he had used me for his own benefit.  There had been no romance.  In fact, there had been almost no regard for me whatsoever.

And once he had finished – which thankfully was usually after only a minute or two – he had rolled over and gone to sleep.  There had rarely been any cuddles or any acknowledgment of my existence at all.  It had left me feeling dirty, worthless and so incredibly lonely. 

I hadn’t known any better.  I had thought that maybe that was how sex was.

But thankfully Brandon proved that theory wrong.

He was everything Carl hadn’t been:  attentive, generous and sweet.  He took his time with me, teasing my trembling body until I was so hot I feared I might spontaneously combust.  He seemed to delight in playing with me, turning me on and making me beg for release before backing off and then doing it all over again. 

By the time Brandon entered me, I was a writhing, begging, moaning mess.  And then he teased me some more.  It was the most exquisite torture imaginable, making my toes curl and my hips pump up and down as though they had a mind of their own.  I was no longer in control of my own body anymore, and I love surrendering to Brandon.  It was completely thrilling and unlike anything I had ever experienced before.

When I was finally allowed the release I so badly needed, it was pure magic.  All that build up had driven my sensitivity to new heights, and once I got what I wanted it was so intense that I screamed.  I saw white as my entire body convulsed, shaking with ecstasy. 

Apparently my reaction was too much for Brandon to withstand.  While I was still in the throes of the most wonderful climax I had ever experienced, he finished inside me.  Then we stayed there together, face to face, chest to chest, our hearts pounding wildly in unison as sweat poured off our exhausted, satisfied bodies.

“You are incredible,” he murmured a bit later once we had both had a chance to recover.  “I mean, I figured it would be good, but...wow!” 

Blushing, I smiled happily at the compliment.  I even believed it.  I felt incredible – energetic, strong, sexy and more than capable of pleasing my man.  The little voice in my head that normally spewed insults at me had finally shut up.  I knew now that not only was I worthy of love, pleasure and happiness but I also
deserved
it.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked, propping his head up on his hand so he could look down at me, an expression of utter devotion on his handsome face. 

“I’m just excited to start my life with you,” I told him, practically giddy at the thought of it. 

“Not as excited as I am,” he assured me, his eyes alive with eager anticipation.  “I have to admit, I’m even kind of looking forward to getting those chickens you wanted.  But I mean, I still might run away from them screaming like a little girl if they come after me.  I’m very manly like that.”

“Extremely manly,” I agreed, barely managing to maintain a straight face.  “Don’t worry about the chickens.  I won’t let them hurt you.”

“My hero,” he laughed, pulling me close and wrapping his arms around me.  It felt so good to be held that I snuggled up to him, my head resting against his shoulder and my lower legs tucked in between his.  I could have happily stayed right there in that moment – and that bed – forever. 

Then he commented, “I’m not really sleepy anymore.  I’m full of energy now.  Funny how that works, huh?   Are you sleepy?”

“Not really,” I realized. 

I was so deliriously happy that sleep was actually the furthest thing from my mind.  Even if I were to shut my eyes and try, I doubted I would be able to settle down enough to drift off.  Actually, had it been up to me I probably would have stayed awake forever so I wouldn’t miss a single moment with Brandon, even if it was simply listening to him breathe.

There was a twinkle in his eye when he spoke next.  “Care to go again?” he asked deviously.

“You can’t be serious!”

“Oh, but I am,” he assured me.  “You have that effect on me...”  He pulled the sheet back from his body.  “See?” he said, gesturing to the irrefutable evidence that had been revealed to support his claim.  “Ready for round two if you are!”

Instantly, a hot flush spread over me.  “Oh God...yes please!”

So this was my life.  I had the perfect guy, a future full of possibilities and a newfound sense of confidence that would see me through anything.  Though our plans for the future were very specific in some regards, they were still rather vague in others – and that was okay. 

Maybe I would go to college – if Brandon decided to keep touring I could always take online courses so I could be with him, I reasoned.  Or maybe I would start my own business.  I quite liked the idea of opening a little shop so I could have a space all of my own.  No matter what I decided to do, I knew Brandon would support my choices.  And I would support his.

Brandon and I didn’t need to figure out every last detail to live our lives and be happy together.  There would be plenty of time to dream and talk and plan later.  Or maybe we wouldn’t even plan a single thing. 

I, for one, was content to take whatever life handed to us one day at a time.  I had never felt so carefree in my life, and it was such a huge relief to finally let go of all the anxiety and negativity I had carried around with me for years.

All that mattered was I had finally figured out where I fit into the world and who I belonged with.  Because in the end, that’s really all life is about, isn’t it?

Overjoyed, I put all thoughts of the beautiful future out of my mind for the time being.  Why live in the future – or the past, for that matter – when the present was right there in front of me, amazing and accessible and perfect? 

Smiling from ear to ear, I wrapped my arms around Brandon’s neck and kissed him passionately, promising myself right then and there to never let him go.