Heart's Desire (7 page)

N
ATHAN WAITED FOR
Jessie in the kitchen, while her sister and Bailey entertained him, reminiscing about the months he'd spend on the ranch. It felt like a lifetime ago, and he barely recognized the naïve kid he'd been in their descriptions of his antics. But when they started telling stories about Jessie as a teen, he couldn't help but be enthralled. He'd known she was a hellcat, but hearing about the time Jessie carved Julia's name into the hood of her ex-boyfriend's car when he cheated on Julia had him doubled over with laughter.

“No one messes with her family.” Julia wiped away a tear, laughing at the memory.

He might laugh at the picture Julia's story created, but he couldn't stop the niggling of fear that crept down his spine when he realized her family would return the same sort of reckless loyalty for her. He was in for a world of hurt when they found out what he'd done.

“Is she still the family superhero?”

Julia cocked her head, her blond hair draping over her shoulder as she thought about the moniker. “I think so. She's been the righter of wrongs in our family as long as I can remember. Even if it was at the risk of her own hide. And, usually,” she added, “it is.”

“Yeah, she doesn't think much about her own safety, does she?” Nathan shook his head; the image of Jessie in the pasture with the stallion earlier made him anxious all over again.

“She comes by it honestly,” Bailey said. “That's the Hart way: act first and worry about the consequences later. I think we get it from our dads.”

“She's going to get herself killed one of these days,” he muttered, leaning back in the chair and watching the two women prepare their own meal for the evening.

Julia paused and looked at him curiously. He'd better be careful to watch what he said around her. She was far too observant. “But, it was pretty amazing to watch. It was like she could read that animal's mind.”

He'd never seen anything like what Jessie did. Seeing her with the two mares, abused and beaten, broke his heart. He'd never seen anything so brutal up close, and it made him wonder what sort of a person would do such a thing. But watching the stallion refuse to give up, then be calmed by Jessie's patience and gentle determination, made him wonder if Jessie wasn't doing exactly what she was meant to.

She shouldn't be taking people for trail rides and campouts. He'd seen the look in her eyes while she worked with each of the horses. It was pure joy, in spite of the danger. There had to be some way for her to market the ranch as a rescue facility instead of a dude ranch. He wanted to help Jessie keep that light in her eyes.

Jessie entered the kitchen, and Nathan's gaze immediately gravitated to her before he closed his eyes while taking a deep breath. He shook his head. He should have known better.

He'd assumed dinner out meant dressing up, so he'd showered and put his own clothes on again. While still casual in slacks and a polo shirt, his clothing was far dressier than her jeans and T-shirt combination. Although, he had to admit the rhinestones on the back pockets of her jeans accentuated the ample curve of her rear as she turned and reached for her truck keys.

“Ready to go, Wall Street?”

“You know I hate that nickname, right?” He slid the chair back under the table amid the laughter of all three women.

“Really?” Jessie spun the keys around a finger and arched a brow before reaching for her purse and sticking out her lower lip. “That's funny. I don't remember asking.”

Nathan caught the slight smile tugging at the corner of her lips. She was beautiful when she smiled, and he wondered why she didn't do it more often.

Because it would contradict her hard-ass facade.

He arched a brow and returned the smile with one of his own. “Okay, Badass, let's go eat.”

Bailey guffawed and Julia hid her laugh behind her hand. Jessie bit the corner of her mouth in an attempt to hide her smile.

She still intrigued him, as much as she ever had. No matter how many women he'd met growing up in the political limelight or at college, he'd never met a woman quite like her. How could she be so patient and tender with the animals and yet so tough on the people around her? He'd seen glimpses of the woman beneath the armor, but only enough to make him want to see more.

J
ESSIE DIALED THE
volume up on the local country radio station as she drove into town. She wanted to avoid talking with Nathan as much possible. The more time she spent near him, the less she seemed to be able to control the heat that warmed her, forcing her to remember their history. And not the part where he left.

She kept finding herself drifting back to that last night and the way his hands had moved expertly over her body, guiding her into the passionate oblivion of desire. She swallowed as her breath caught in her chest, and she glanced sideways to find him watching her. Nathan made her uncomfortable, like she was dazed and off balance, and she couldn't have that. She'd spent too many years trying to piece her heart back together.

Jessie wasn't the type of woman who fell in love easily. It wasn't that she wasn't attracted to other men, but none had measured up to who she'd thought Nathan was that summer. Handsome and charming, he'd seemed devoted to her brother, even going so far as to evade her fumbling attempts to flirt at first. But after their first kiss at the river, they'd both known there was something special between them. At least, she'd thought they'd both known. He'd just asked for a little time to break the news to her brother himself. It turned out that she'd been the only one naïve enough to believe in fairy tales.

Jessie bit her lip nervously. She wasn't comfortable with this arrangement. She didn't understand why they couldn't just have this discussion at home, where the entire family could have talked to him about the ranch. She wanted the prying eyes, if for no other reason than to keep her on the defensive attack. Being alone with Nathan was a recipe for disaster. But she couldn't admit that to her family.

She was used to feeling completely in control, and since Nathan's arrival, that control had disappeared like early morning mist in the summer sun. He'd reawakened feelings she'd though were long gone, leaving her grasping for a handhold on her scattered emotions. Her body was not cooperating with her brain tonight.

She pulled into the parking lot of the lone pizza place in town and turned off the truck. Trying to look as nonchalant as possible, even though her heart felt like it was going to pound right out of her chest, she let her hands hang over the top of the steering wheel and eyed him suspiciously. She'd never been one to beat around the bush and didn't see the point in starting now.

“Why are we here? What are you hoping to achieve?”

He chuckled quietly, the deep, rich sound like honeyed whiskey, sending heat swirling into her belly. “What's the matter, Jess? Do I make you nervous?”

That wasn't an answer. She narrowed her eyes at him, irritated that he could read her so easily. Nathan just gave her a playboy smile.

“My friends and family call me Jess.
You
don't qualify as either any more. It's Jessie.”

Jessie grabbed her purse and got out of the truck, slamming the door shut behind her. He jumped from his seat to follow her, his long strides easily making up the distance. She walked into the pizza parlor and made her way to the front counter.

“Give me a pitcher of beer and a large combination, extra thick crust.”

“Can you make half of that without onions?” Nathan asked the girl taking the order.

Jessie was surprised at how quickly he'd caught up to her. “
Extra
onions on the rest,” she added, secretly hoping they would fall onto his side and choke him.

The clerk, a confused high school girl, looked dumbly from one to the other. “Um, okay. That'll be thirty-six dollars and fifty-five cents.” She handed Jessie a tented number as Nathan pulled out his credit card and passed it to the girl.

“Why don't you go find a seat?” he suggested, looking back at the busy dining room.

Jessie ignored his advice. She wasn't going to take orders from him. Clamping her jaw together, she crossed her arms across her chest and leaned her hip against the counter, waiting for him to sign the credit card slip.

“I would've paid for dinner, you know.”

He looked down at her oddly, as if he didn't understand her annoyance. “I know. Tonight is my treat.”

With a huff, she spun on her heel, hating that he seemed to bring out this juvenile, irrationally defiant side of her personality. She clenched her hands into fists, her nails digging into her palms as she made her way through the throng of families, past the jukebox and old video game machines, into a side room that was nearly empty. Finding an unoccupied pub table, she slid onto a tall stool, watching as Nathan finished paying and headed her direction.

Nathan slid onto the chair across from her and folded his hands on the Formica tabletop, staring at her silently. She waited for him to say something, anything. He just sat there, still as a statue, watching her carefully. She shifted in the chair. She didn't like being scrutinized like a specimen on display.

“What?”

“You're a tough nut to crack, Jessie Hart.” He smiled, and this one went all the way to his eyes. They glimmered with humor, deep green with golden flecks. “One minute, you're gentle and coaxing with the horses, and the next you're ready to do battle with me. No matter how hard I try to figure you out, you keep surprising me.” He ran his fingers over the top of the table. “I get the feeling there aren't many people who know the real you.”

Jessie leaned back in her chair and quirked a resentful brow at him. “You should know better than anyone.”

His smile fell, and she silently congratulated herself for a target hit. “Do you really want to do this now?”

She shrugged and forced herself to appear as unperturbed as possible. “Well, if I wait, you might disappear again.”

Nathan sighed. “I apologized for that, Jessie. I was a kid.”

Bitter laughter burst past her lips. “You were twenty-two, the same age Bailey is now. She would never use someone the way you did.”

He clenched his jaw tightly, and she saw the muscle in his temple jump. “I didn't use you.” At her dubious look, he hurried on. “I can see how it looked that way, but that was never my intention.”

Jessie shook her head at him and folded her hands over the tabletop. “Maybe you could explain to me how sleeping with me, then leaving with some bullshit promise to call, wasn't using me. Because in my book that makes you a—”

His usual stoic mask slipped. “I planned to call.”

It wasn't the explanation she'd waited years to hear. He hadn't even tried to feed her some lame excuse. Apparently, she wasn't even worth that. “For what, another romp in the hay?”

“Why didn't you ever tell anyone about us?”

She laughed quietly. “Did you really want me to? Do you have any clue what my father and brother would have done if they'd found out the man I lo—” She paused realizing how much she'd almost admitted to him. She would never tell him that he'd been her first—first lover, and first broken heart. “They'd have killed you.”

“I'm just surprised.” His voice was somber but repentant. “Most women would have jumped at the chance to get revenge for what I did. I guess I was expecting . . . ” Nathan paused searching for the safest thing to say and shrugged. “Something different.”

His voice and his eyes promised sincerity, but she felt torn. She wanted to believe him but he'd lied to her with a straight face before, and her faith had proved painfully misplaced. “Yeah? Well, it would have had to mean something.” She rolled her eyes and looked around the room, unable to meet his gaze, knowing that he'd be able to read the lie in her eyes.

She felt his gaze caressing her. “Then why the hostility?”

She glared at him. “Gee, Nathan, I wonder. My parents died six months ago, leaving me a ranch to run by myself. My brother and
younger
sister have both had to loan me money, and I still can't make ends meet. Now, I've got the one man in the world I least wanted to ever see again snooping into my finances.”

“Wow,” he said, tilting his head to the side. “Least wanted, huh?”

“Well, after your half-hearted apology? Can we just get this finished so I can head home?”

“That's right, you're all business, aren't you, Jessie? Fine, then. Tell me about the history of the ranch.”

She dragged her thoughts back to the present. “I'm not sure what I can tell you that Justin couldn't have.”

“Humor me.”

“The ranch has been in my family for years, long before my father was born, but my parents decided to turn what used to be a cattle ranch into a dude ranch. They were good at it, and it became a retreat for people who wanted to experience a bit of the “Old West” in their backyard. You've seen most of the renovations they made other than the addition to The Ridge.”

“Just enough amenities to make it comfortable but still feel like you're roughing it,” he agreed.

“We aren't one of those ‘glamping' places, if that's what you're getting at.”

His lips curved into a lopsided grin and her heart fluttered. Warmth flooded her belly and sank lower. She dug her nails into her palms again.
Get a grip, Jess.

“I wasn't trying to insinuate that.”

She lifted one shoulder absently in a
whatever
gesture, refusing to meet his gaze, but relaxing her hands enough to run her fingernail along the edge of the table.

“Have you always wanted to work with abused horses or was that something you started doing afterward?” He leaned back in his chair, hooking his elbow over the high back of the stool.