Hearsay (20 page)

Never in a million years could Derrick have imagined he would find himself on the receiving end of such voracious energy. Roman was a gentleman in every sense of the word, and Derrick always thought Roman would be a mostly passive and tender lover. He knew assumptions were never good, but, up to the previous day, he'd been the pursuer to Roman's deflector, ready, willing, and able to seduce their way to the nearest bedroom. Roman, on the other hand, had slammed said door in Derrick's face on more than one occasion. Derrick's belief that he'd probably have to tie Roman to the bed in order to have sex with him had been more than justified.

But he'd been wrong.

Thank God.

Roman was more than willing, himself. He was commanding, and, to Derrick's total delight, a little rough around the edges when it came to business of the flesh. He could tell that, when the time finally came, Roman would be the one calling the shots. The mere thought had Derrick almost coming on the spot.

He wanted Roman so much he was willing to give the man whatever he wanted. Derrick liked trying different things, and he could definitely assume a dominant role with another man. But that wasn't his natural inclination. Whenever he fantasized about Roman, he always pictured himself on his back, getting rammed by Roman's cock. Luckily for Derrick, his man hadn't been shy about letting him know in subtle, but far from uncertain ways, that he was a top.

Yum.

Derrick roamed Roman's back with his hands. He wanted to touch as much as he could. To memorize every line and muscle. To crawl inside his skin. To confirm they really were doing this. That he and Roman were together in the flesh. That this wasn't yet another fantasy of his.

The loud burst of applause that rudely broke the spell took care of that.

Roman's entire body stiffened, and Derrick took a couple of steps back before Roman's firm hold on his waist brought him to a halt.

He searched Roman's eyes for any signs of regret. Roman gave him a slow smile, as if he knew and understood what Derrick was doing and why. Around them music started playing again, and, for the second time in less than five minutes, Derrick closed the distance between them.

Roman's cheek felt deliciously scratchy when he pressed his face to Derrick's. His warm breath fanned Derrick's ear. They were touching from pelvis to chest, and they were both semi-hard, but there were no hungry kisses this time around.

Derrick closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment, letting the beauty of their easy embrace and camaraderie take his worries away.
 

This was perfect.

Being in this club, free to touch Roman as much as he wanted, was everything.

"Is this a date?" he whispered after a while. "It feels like a date."

Roman took a shuddering breath before he said, "The first of many if things go well."

Derrick smiled lazily and brushed Roman's earlobe with his lips. "I love seeing you like this."

"Like what?" Roman asked in a tender tone.

"Like you're happy to be with me."

"I am," Roman confirmed. "You have no idea how much."

"Yet only yesterday you were ready to send me away," Derrick teased. "What changed your mind?"

"You called me Mr. Bradford."

"Huh?"

Roman hugged him harder and nuzzled the side of his face before clarifying. "Having you call me by my last name felt like you were shutting me out. I realized it'd kill me to go back to only being your boss."

Derrick opened his eyes slowly and turned to look at Roman. "That's all you've been for the past year," he murmured, feeling slightly confused.

"You know that's not true. Even when I was avoiding you, I knew I was the man you wanted as well as being your boss," Roman explained. "Then we kissed, and I turned you down, and you had this look on your face…" Roman blinked rapidly and cleared his throat. "When you walked into my office, I was still the man you wanted, but when you left I knew I was about to become the man you were ready to leave behind. It was more than I could handle, and I…" He licked his lips and swallowed hard. "I had to stop you. I couldn't let you go without finding out if there's a way we can be together despite what you told me a long time ago."

And there it was again.

A reference to what had kept him away.

"I'm glad you came to your senses," Derrick said with a happy smile, set on enjoying their evening together.

"Were you walking away for good?" Roman asked, following his lead.

"Not at all," Derrick snorted. "I'm not that strong." He winked at Roman and kissed him on the nose. "But I'm grateful you thought so."

Roman chuckled at the same time trepidation clouded his eyes.

Before he could get all gloomy and morose again, Derrick asked, "So how about dinner tomorrow at my place tomorrow?"

"I'd love to, but I have a previous engagement. I'm afraid I have to decline."

Decline? He doesn't want a rain check?
Derrick mentally panicked.
That's not good!

"Would extending this recess from real life we agreed on earlier today make me a coward?" Roman asked, and all of a sudden Derrick could breathe again.

"I can see you're stressed out," Derrick said tenderly. "Need a break?"

Roman nodded emphatically. "Just for the weekend, then we'll talk."

"I can do that," he said with a smile. "What's this previous engagement, though?"

"It's a benefit dinner," Roman explained. "Do you happen to own a tux?"

"I do!"

"You hesitated for two seconds." Roman laughed. "Liar liar…"
 

"I do have a credit card from Barneys New York," Derrick informed, "and I don't need much tailoring either, so I
will
have a tux."
 

Roman buried his face in Derrick's hair and pulled him closer still. "I'll pick you up at seven o'clock."

Chapter Thirteen

"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves."

Viktor E. Frankl

"Or, at the very least, the way we deal with things," Roman concluded as he walked to the coffee maker to refill his favorite mug, one of those white mass-produced things that said "Think You Can Get Me Off?" in black, bold letters.

It'd probably been bought at the small souvenir shop near the office, where they sold all kinds of merchandise with different lawyer puns written on it. Derrick had given it to him on their fifth lunch unofficial date with a provoking glint in his eyes and a flirty "Thought of you when I saw it."

Roman loved it.

He sipped his black coffee and went back to the kitchen island where he had set up his laptop.

After reading today's inspirational quote two more times, he closed his mom's email and reached for the phone. He got the voicemail five times, but, on the sixth attempt, Josephine finally answered.

"I have so many things to do I might lose my mind just from thinking about my list. Why, oh why do I get myself into this? I'm bowing out. I can't juggle a husband, four kids, a career and fundraisers at the same time. I'm only one person," his sister whined. "What can I do for you, baby brother? Before you answer, please keep in mind there's absolutely nothing I
will
do for you today. I don't have the time or the head for it, and I probably won't have the energy for the next three months. I was just being polite when I asked."

"Good morning to you too, Jo."

"Oh, my God," she gasped. "Is that a smile I hear in your voice?"

"Maybe," Roman said, painfully aware humor had been absent from his life for far too long. Bitter and grumpy wasn't who he was, but he sometimes had a hard time remembering that. "You're my absolute favorite sister. Did I ever tell you that?"

"You say the same thing to Dana whenever you want something from her." Jo half-snorted, half-laughed her answer. "I'd tell you that trick hasn't worked since you turned seventeen, but you sound so happy, I'll refrain from bursting your bubble and breaking your heart."

Roman grinned.

Contrary to Jo's claim, both his older and younger sisters would do anything for him, same as he'd do anything for them. They weren't kids anymore, but their bond and support of one another remained as strong as ever. They were a close-knit family, and Roman felt fortunate for that.

Predictably, Jo asked, "So what do you want?"

"An additional chair at our table tonight," Roman said in a more serious tone. "Something came up. I'm bringing someone with me."

"No way in hell!" There was a thud and a curse before Jo added, "There's a no last-minute-seating-arrangement-changes rule."

Roman laughed. "You're making that up."

"I am not," she assured him. "The committee takes seating arrangements very seriously. Some of the donors can't stand each other. Keeping the movers and shakers apart is like playing a complicated game of chess. Once the chart is finalized, nothing can be changed."

"I'll be paying ten grand for that extra chair and plate," Roman reminded her. "I'm sure that will motivate the committee."

"I could probably order a few more beds for the new Pediatric wing with that money…"

"Exactly, and you're part of the organizing committee, so make it happen."

"You're smiling again, I can tell. Why are you so happy? I mean, I'm thrilled you're in such a good mood, but you haven't been in a good mood in years."

"Well, today I happen to feel light-hearted and happy," he admitted. "I know it's a rare occasion, but roll with it."

"You're freaking me out."

Roman wasn't surprised by his sister's confession. She was a no-nonsense kind of person who always spoke her mind.

"I'm not losing my marbles, if that's what you're afraid of," Roman told her softly. "I'm fine."

Actually, he was better than he'd been in a long time, but he didn't elaborate.

"Okay… I just…"

There was no need to finish her sentence. Roman knew exactly what she'd meant to say.

He had almost lost his mind the day he got confirmation of James's ultimate betrayal. At first he'd been stunned. A few seconds later, or maybe hours, he'd started cracking up. He'd laughed and laughed, as if everything was a bad cosmic joke. Then he'd fallen apart in his big sister's arms.

Jo had gotten him through that first night. She'd come to see him every day after that, checking on him constantly until he managed to put himself together and leave his room. Nowadays he could say he had reclaimed his life and was able to function in a somewhat normal way, but, no matter how often he told Jo things were looking up, she never stopped worrying about his mental health. She said he needed to see a therapist. Roman disagreed. It was the only point of contention between them.

"So…" He cleared his throat. "I'll give you a check tonight for the additional chair, plus something extra for your trouble. Or I can have it delivered to you, if you prefer. I don't know if you need the donation before the event."

"Who's your plus one?" Jo asked sharply. "Lord, Roman… Are you bringing Derrick? Did you get your head out of your ass? Will I finally get to meet him? You know I've been dying to take a look at the man you like so much."

That was true.

He'd confided in her when he started eyeing Derrick, even though he'd still been involved with James and had no right to be interested in another man. He'd told her the only man he wanted was Derrick when she asked if he was dating after breaking up with James. She was also the first one to hear his decision of staying away from Derrick when Roman's world crumbled under his feet. She knew about Roman's attraction before Alan and Sergio figured it out.

"What makes you think it's Derrick?" he teased.

"Are you kidding me?" Jo shrieked, sounding more like her teenage self than the forty-five year-old, highly respected oncologist she was. "You bought a plate but agreed to attend the gala under duress, yet you're willing to drop another ten grand for lettuce and feta cheese just so you can bring a plus one. That's a heck of an expensive date. I can't think of anyone you'd do that for other than Derrick."

Roman smiled. He was starting to freak out himself.

"You know me too well," he said.
 

Jo shrieked again.

Before she started planning the wedding, Roman informed, "He doesn't know yet, so don't go thinking there's been a turn of events.

Then again, that wasn't entirely true.

He now knew how Derrick tasted and how he felt pressed against Roman's body. He knew Derrick was a terrible dancer and didn't really like to drink. They'd finally gone on a real date, talked about personal things, and danced the night away. They'd kissed each other silly in Roman's car when he drove Derrick back to his own place.

Regardless of the outcome of their conversation, Roman would never be the same.

'He'll be your date tonight," Jo pointed out. "That's a turn of events in and of itself."

"Will you stop reading my mind?" Roman took a deep breath. "Just act normal when you meet him, please."

"I promise I'll leave the confetti and party hats at home," she goofed. "No idea what the rest of the family will do, though. They might throw an actual party when they see you walk into the banquet hall with a new man after all this time."

"Hopefully they won't ask too many questions," Roman said.
 

"Mom will, and you know this," Jo said with a laugh. "I can't wait to meet this guy, Roman. I really can't! And now I need to go. Duty calls. Love you, baby bro."

"Love you, too."

Roman ended the call and considered calling Derrick just to say hello, then thought it was probably too soon. A quick glance at the clock told him it was only eleven, meaning they'd only parted ways seven hours ago. He'd be better off waiting until mid-afternoon, at which time he'd be able to use Derrick's planned shopping trip to Barneys as an excuse to call. Roman could ask how it went, then confirm they were still on for seven o'clock. He'd get to talk to Derrick without coming across as being needy, impatient, or both.

Roman's phone rang in his hand.

Jo would probably say he needed to be put on meds for split-personality disorder if she saw the grin on his face.