Good for Now (Book One of The Now Series) (10 page)

Chapter 23

Julie

I wake up to find Kevin’s side of the bed just like it was last night. It was not touched. He must have stayed up the night. He seemed stressed after last night’s dinner with my father.

Why was he so upset over my father not giving us a house anymore. I have to admit that I am glad that he didn’t. It was suppose to be a wedding gift and because the wedding was postponed, my father was not about to give a house to someone who was just his son-in-law.

After all I am still paying for most of the expenses here, because Kevin has been pouring whatever money he makes back in the law practice.

Ah, well. It is time I start calling people about the wedding plans. I feel sick about doing so, but it has to be done.

My phone buzzes, it’s a text from Kevin.

“Let’s elope.”

I feel like someone has pulled my chest back, I can barely breathe.

“I love you and I don’t think we should wait.”

My hands are shaking, I want to but it feels wrong. It feels rushed.

“Come Julie.”

I call Kevin.

“Hi, what’s up with the rush?”

“I was thinking that’s all. I don’t see why we should wait and we still can get married next year.”

“How is that possible?”

“Let’s elope and not tell anyone, and when we have the wedding you want, we can get married by a priest.”

“Come on Julie, I love you, and with the trial coming up. I’d like to say to Ms. Kemp that I am married, so she can stop giving me these looks.”

My heart sinks, feeling utterly jealous and ravenously mad.

“What? Is she hitting on you?”

“Not where I can prove it, but she looks at me longer that she should, and fuck I want the job because it will open doors for me, and us. Fuck, it will give you the fairytale wedding you want.”

“A fairytale wedding doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg, or for you to do something you don’t feel is right. Maybe you should not take the job.”

I take a deep breath, remembering what my father said last night. How I should be supportive to Kevin, unlike how my mother was to him.

“Are you serious? Not take the job. After I fucken gloated about it to your father. I swear he is up to something. Did you know about the house?”

“No, I had no idea, but really Kevin we are old enough to buy our own house. It was a nice gesture but I think that was over the top.”

I could feel the tension over the phone. I could only imagine what was going through Kevin’s mind. Knowing that Mrs. Kemp was indirectly making advances at him, made my blood boil, but Kevin knew the agreement. He said he was cured from having a wandering eye.

“I have to go Julie, Mrs. Kemp is on the other line.”

I hang up.

Chapter 24

Julie

A week later Kevin moves to Orlando, to be close to Mrs. Kemp he says, so he can spend his every second plotting how he is going to make what she did, murdering an innocent man, look like self-defense.

So he ever knew she was lying. I told him he was playing with fire, but he said that it didn’t matter, because it would all come down to his skills. It was whether he could create in the minds of the jury a speck of reasonable doubt.

Again, I told him it was best if he just walk away from representing Mrs. Kemp but he wouldn’t listen.

“Julie, you don’t want to marry someone who will always live under the shadow of your father. Do you?”

I wanted to say, “What are you talking about? And I never said or hinted to that thought of yours.”

“See I told you so, so let me do my thing and win this fucken case, so we can have what we want and buy our own house.”

“Kevin, take it easy.”

“I can’t, because if I lose this case I’ll be the fucken laugh of the town, and I might as well not come back home. Do you want that?”

“No, “ I say, feeling restless. Wanting nothing more than for him to come home.

In my misery, I keep up with the trial, to have a glance at him on the news, and in my time look into the evidence, hoping I can piece what is known to help Kevin so he can come home. I often text him possible angles he can take and smile when I see when he presents them in court. However, the prosecutor is no rookie and counters every possible doubt with a strong counterclaim.

The trial looks like a shoe in for the state, however, I have seen what once seemed like a long shot actually follow through. So I am hopeful that Kevin can find an angle I had not thought of.

A month later, the trial comes to an end and the jury has come to a verdict.

My eyes are glued to the television, staring at Kevin next to Mrs. Kemp. He is holding her hand, like she is his wife.

Relax, I tell myself. He is holding her hand to support her and for no other reason.

“Has the jury come to an verdict?” asks the judge.

“Yes,” a jurywoman says.

“Alright then,” the judges says as he receives the verdict in his hand.

“We the jury find the defendant guilty.”

At that point I shut the television off, not want to see or hear anything else.

I text Kevin, “You did your best, come home.”

I keep my phone glued to my hand, staring at the screen waiting for him to text back, but nothing.

A few hours later I text him, “When are you coming home.” Again, I stare at the screen and nothing. Later at dinner time, I call him, happy to hear the phone ring, believing he will answer the phone but he doesn’t. I am scared, what is happening? Did he do the unspeakable and somehow harmed himself? Did he get in an accident? I am sick with worry.

I go on the Internet, google his name, Kevin Ward, lawyer for Mrs. Kemp, and to my horror I see a picture of them at a BBQ, he is holding her hand again, this time I feel like my heart wanting to jump out of my chest.

If I didn’t know it, they do look like they are a couple. I caption under the picture reads, Kevin Ward and Mrs. Kemp at a woman abuse fundraiser for domestic violence awareness.

Maybe I am being unsupportive at this moment, I could see this as a tactic for her case.

I call Kevin again, “It would be nice if you could call me and let me know you are OK, or I will call the police and file a missing person’s report.”

I hate having to play hardball, but I do want to know if he is OK and I want to know when he will be coming home.

The phone rings, it’s Kevin.

“Hi,” is all I can manage to get out of my system. Feeling incredibly upset, yet happy to hear his voice.

“Hi,” he says in a soft voice, making it hard for me to hear him.

“When are you coming home?” I ask, stupid tears start streaming down my cheeks, burning my eyes.

“I am not sure,” he says.

“What?” I say, I feel like I just have been hit in the stomach, having a hard time breathing.

“I need time away, to think about everything,” he says.

“I am sorry about the case.”

“I don’t care about it, I just need time to think about things. I realize I am not what I want to be, and I just don’t know if I am good enough for you or anyone,” Kevin says.

Tears race down my cheeks, I can’t breathe, I feel sick to my stomach. What is he talking about?

“Come home,” I manage to say, falling back to the bed, turning to a fetal position.

“No, I need time away, it is the right thing to do.”

“No, coming home is the right thing to do,” I say.

“I got to go.”

“No, please come home.”

“I can’t.”

“What do I tell people?” I ask, not really caring to know his answer, only asking to have him think about his suggestions.

“Whatever you want,” Kevin says. “Bye, Julie.”

“Don’t do this,” I say, then he hangs up.

Weeks pass and I don’t hear from him and his mail has been forwarded to Mrs. Kemp's address. I even drove up to see him, but I was not able to get through the gates. Yet I knew he was there because his car was in the winding driveway. I drove away heartbroken. I had no idea what was happening there, but I knew Mrs. Kemp’s sentencing date was days away.

I even called him at work and Marjorie said she hadn’t heard from him and was afraid she would not have a job much longer. I had no idea what to say to her valid concern, other than to keep calling Kevin.

Maybe if I had eloped with him none of this would have happened. Remembering my father’s words that I should be supportive to Kevin.

Chapter 25

Julie

I isolated myself away from the world for three months. Hardly having any energy to do anything, other than sleep, even moving around in bed was a challenge.

My father was off, on an European vacation with Sam, I did manage to answer when he called, it took every ounce of energy to act like everything was alright. I didn’t want him asking questions about Kevin.

However, Amanda did not buy my act and said she would find Kevin and beat him down. Of course, I did not want that. The only way Amanda wouldn’t do this, was if I started to see her therapist Violet.

"So how was your first session with Violet?" Amanda asks.

"Awful, I couldn't stop crying, and I had a hard time not slurring my words like a drunk,” I say, feeling my temperature rise. “And if there was a panic button she would have certainly pushed it and a man would have busted through the doors with a horrid white stray jacket to contain me. I really felt psychotic,” I say, with a grin.

“Really a stray jacket? You are hilarious.”

“No seriously I felt like I could use one.”

“Come on, don’t be so hard on yourself, it was your first session. It gets better and you will get better, trust me, Violet is a saint.”

“I don’t know, I was pretty bad. I think I scared her.”

“Give me a break, you are hardly psychotic, confused is more like it. Who wouldn’t be? Kevin played with your mind," Amanda says.

"I thought she was going to say I was a lost case, after using an entire box of tissues, but she didn't. So I do give her credit, though she could cancel my next session if she wants."

"She is not like that, stop being extreme, Julie, you always think the worst."

I take a deep breath, “True, I do. I wonder why?”

“A good question, you and Violet could explore. I am telling you she will pull things out of you that will blow you away. Things that will get you thinking and feeling."

"She has already accomplished this, and I am acting on it," I say.

Amanda looks at me strangely, like she doesn't believe what she just heard.

"You heard right, I am acting on a few things, actually. Might as well get going with my life."

"Wow, you are right. I thought I was hearing what I wanted to hear. I’m impressed. So what are you acting on?"

"Well, after seeing her, and how I was keeping up with the Kemp trial with interest and desire."

"Yes, I am all ears," Amanda says.

"I decided that I want to get a real job as a lawyer, and move on with my life."

"Great, you’re a great lawyer."

"I also want to get my own place, I can't continue to live in the place where I am forever reminded of Kevin. I need a clean break."

"Jesus, everything you just said is music to my ears. Can you please pinch me? I want to make sure I am not in a dream."

I laugh, "How about a hug?"

"A hug, yes much better."

"Thank you Amanda," I say.

"I am beyond happy for you, but what will you do when Kevin comes back?"

My heart drops, because I hadn't thought about it. "He won't, he clearly has moved on."

"I hope you are right, but I also know his track record, in the past he always returned, even after he cheated."

"I know, but please let's not talk about it. I just have to move on."

"Do you still love him?"

My heart sinks, "Not sure."

"I am sorry I said his name, let's not talk about him ever again."

"Never never.”

A few hours later I feel better, seeing the urgency to really move on with my life. I want the light at the end of the tunnel. I can't waste my life, waiting for him to come back. Still crazy thoughts fill my mind, maybe he is protecting me from something, and cut me out for a good reason.

No, he is not protecting you, the rational side voices, he doesn't love you anymore. He has moved on to someone else.

I focus my attention to finding a new place and look on the Internet for properties for around downtown, unfortunately not much in my price range.

I then remember Lynn, my dad's real estate agent. I call her and see if she can help me find a two or three bedroom condo or small house around 1,400 square feet.

"Sure honey, I'd love to show you around. I'm on my way to the office and I'll see what I can find, and what pocket listings agents in the office may have," Lynn says.

Staring at the computer I realize its Kevin's. I'm surprised he didn't take it with him to Orlando. I know he has word files, maybe I'll have a look at them or maybe not. At least not now, not wanting to have a panic attack or discover others he forgot to mention. Other interns, other women he had relations with, is putting it nicely. No, other women he screwed behind my back.

My phone rings, it's Lynn.

"I have the perfect house, its sort of hush hush and the sellers are motivated," Lynn says.

"That was quick, my father wasn't joking when he said you were the best," I say, truly surprised how quickly Lynn worked.

“He is sweet, love your father.”

“I agree, he is.”

“I am excited to show you the house. Can you meet me there in about an hour?"

"Yes, just text me the address and I'll see you there."

"Perfect, its on Chestnut Street."

“Chestnut near the inter-coastal?" I ask.

"That's the one."

"My mom and I use to admire the homes on the street, I am sure I am going to love it."

"Great, see you soon."