Give Us a Chance (33 page)

The sliding doors from outside open and I see Callie walk in, along with Nash. Callie's holding a paper sack and Nash has two trays of coffee cups.

I get up and take one of the trays from Nash. "I didn't think you guys would get here so early."

"We wanted to be here when they got whatever news they're getting," Callie says as we go sit down. "Have you heard anything?"

"No. I dropped them off and parked, and when I got inside, they were already with their dad."

"We got coffee for everyone." Callie hands me a cup.

"Dad and Austin are on their way," Nash said. "They're picking up Jen. Bryce is staying home to work on Liza's car."

My family's freaking awesome. The way they care about people, taking time to help others, is something that's rare. Most people would spend their Saturday doing something else, something that benefits themselves, but my family drops everything to help whoever needs it.

Jen, Austin, and my dad show up a few minutes later, and we have our coffee and the donuts Callie and Nash brought. A half hour passes and Ivy and Liza return to the waiting room. They're not crying so that's a good sign.

Ivy and Liza smile when they see all of us. They still can't believe my family is here for them.

"How is he?" I ask.

"Better," Ivy says. "He's really tired from the meds but he looked good. And he said he isn't in any pain."

Ivy and Liza sit across from us and Callie hands them each a coffee. "Here. I hope it's still hot."

Liza takes the lid off hers and takes a sip. "Caramel macchiato. My favorite. Thanks, Callie."

"I totally needed this," Ivy says, sipping hers. "Callie, that's really sweet of you. Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Damn, I should've thought of that. I should've got something for Ivy instead of just sitting here. Something that would tell her I'm thinking of her.

"He got the flowers," Ivy says to my dad. "Thanks for sending those. They're beautiful."

He smiles. "You need something to brighten up those hospital rooms."

My dad sent flowers? Great. I really need to do something. My family's making me look bad.

"You guys want something to eat?" Austin asks. "Callie brought donuts, but if you want something else I can go get it."

And again, I should've offered to do that, but I wasn't thinking. This lack of sleep is really hitting me hard. I need to wake up.

"I'll just have a donut," Ivy says, "but thanks for offering."

"Have you talked to the doctor yet?" my dad asks.

"Just now," Liza says. "He said they won't have test results until this afternoon. But if the mass was benign, then it sounds like my dad's going to be getting a lot better. The doctor said the back pain should be gone now that he doesn't have that mass pressing on his nerves. Here we all thought it was his injury causing the pain, but that's not what it was. He'll still need to go to physical therapy, but the doctor said Dad should be able to go back to work in a few months."

"That's awesome," I say.

"Yeah." Ivy looks down at her coffee. "As long as the tests come out okay."

"They will," Liza says, squeezing her hand.
 

Ivy nods, and tries to smile. "You guys don't need to sit here all day. We'll call and let you know if there's any news."

"We're happy to stay," my dad says. "We don't mind."

"I know, but there's really no reason to. Dad is resting and we won't hear about the results until this afternoon."

"Then maybe we'll head out and come back in a few hours." He looks at me. "Jake will be here. He can keep us updated."

He didn't have to give me that not-so-subtle hint to stay. I wasn't planning on going anywhere.

They all clear out except for Callie and Jen, who wanted to stay a little longer. I'm grateful they offered. I didn't want to be the only one left here with Ivy and her sister. Ivy and I have our own issues, and now her sister is mad at me, making things awkward. And I don't have much to say, so we would've just been sitting here in silence, but Callie and Jen are able to keep the conversation going for hours.

Around noon, I go out and get everyone lunch and bring it back. Afterward, as I'm tossing out the trash, Ivy comes up to me. "You want to take a walk? I could use some fresh air."

"Sure."

We get our coats and go out to a courtyard behind the hospital that has a path that winds through some trees. I'm sure in the summer it looks nice when all the flowers are in bloom, but now, in the winter, it looks drab and depressing.

"Ivy, I'm sorry I'm not doing more," I tell her as we walk slowly along the path.

"What do you mean? You're doing plenty."

"It's not enough. I feel like I should be doing more for you but I don't know what to do. Just tell me what you need and I'll do it."

"You don't have to do anything. You're here for me and that's enough."

I take her hand, which maybe I shouldn't do given that we're on a break, but I couldn't help it. I've been with her all day and haven't been able to touch her or kiss her or hold her, and I can't take not being able to do those things. It's an automatic response when I'm with her, but I had to hold myself back so her sister wouldn't yell at me later, accusing me of leading Ivy on, giving her mixed signals. That's not what this is. I'm not trying to mislead her in any way. Right now, I'm just trying to be here for her. Comfort her. Support her.

"I'm so scared, Jake," she says quietly.

"It's going to be fine."

"You sound just like Liza. She keeps saying it's going to be fine and it's pissing me off because she doesn't know that, so she shouldn't say it and get my hopes up." She rubs her eyes, which are tearing up again.

"Liza's just trying to be positive. She's not trying to make you mad."

"I know. She's always the optimist. I'm the realist." She sniffles and smiles a little. "Or pessimist, if you ask my dad. He's an optimist like Liza. He's always telling me to look on the bright side."

"Then do it." I stop walking and turn her toward me, my hands on her arms. "Go for the positive this time. There are two outcomes here, good and bad, so what's the harm in thinking positive and saying the outcome will be good?"

She shrugs. "I don't know. I guess I've always been someone who likes to prepare for the worst, and if that doesn't happen, then I'm happily surprised. It's better than being hopeful, only to be crushed later."

"Is it?"

"What do you mean?"

"If something bad is coming, do you really want to spend the moments before it happens being miserable, worrying about it? Wouldn't you rather spend that time being hopeful, believing everything's going to be okay?"

"Yeah. I guess. But that's hard to do."

"I know it is, but just try it. Try it this once and see what happens. When we get back inside, go and see your dad and be happy when you're with him. Because not everything is bad, Ivy. Your dad is alive, the surgery went well, and he's not in pain. Focus on those things instead of what's coming. And even if the news isn't good, at least you had those moments with your dad that
were
good."

As I say it, my own words hit me like a brick to the head. I was saying all that for Ivy's sake, but just realized I'm doing the same thing she does. I'm living my life preparing for the worst possible outcome, when in reality that's just one of many outcomes. And do I really want to spend my life avoiding the things that could lead to that one possible outcome that might never happen?

"Jake." She holds her phone up. "Liza just texted me. The doctor has the results back. We have to go inside."

I hold her back before she goes. "Tell me it's going to be good news."

She shakes her head. "I can't."

"Yes, you can. It's going to be good news. Say it."

Her eyes lift to mine and she half-smiles. "It's going to be good news."

"Okay, let's go." I keep hold of her hand and we hurry back inside and meet up with Liza and the doctor. I go back to my seat as he takes them aside.

"You think he's going to be okay?" Callie asks.

"I think he's going to be fine. Better than fine. He's going to be good."

She nudges me. "Look at you, being all optimistic. You're starting to sound like Nash."

"Well, maybe I could learn a few things from him. He
is
my big brother after all. He should be starting to rub off on me by now."

When I look over to check on Ivy, I see her shoulders shaking, and then Liza's. They're both crying. Shit. Then they hug each other and I see Ivy smiling. Like really smiling. They're happy tears. Tears of relief that it's not cancer.

"Looks like good news," Jen says.

"Yeah. I knew it would be." I stand up, smiling, as Ivy comes rushing over to us.

"It's not cancer. It was just scar tissue from his injury. He's going to be okay."

 
I hug her. "I told you it'd be good news."

"You were right." She laughs through her tears. "I don't know how you knew, but you were right."

I didn't know. That's the thing. You never know what's going to happen. But planning for the best felt a hell of a lot better than planning for the worst.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Ivy

It's Monday and my dad's recovery is going well. He'll be released from the hospital later this week. He's already excited about returning to work. Liza and I had to remind him that it'll be a good three months before he can go back, and even then, he'll have to work limited hours and not do anything too strenuous while his back continues to heal.

My dad said Jake's family has been by to see him twice since Saturday. I wasn't there when they stopped by, but I need to call and thank them. They're such great people. I love them all. They're so generous, not thinking twice about helping someone. Bryce had to order a part for Liza's car and Jake's dad wouldn't let her pay for it. He said he'd take care of it, and Bryce is doing the labor for free.

Nash and Callie gave Liza and me some restaurant gift cards so we wouldn't have to worry about making meals with everything going on. And Callie offered to come over and cook if we want a homemade meal instead of going out. I turned her down, saying that's way too much work, but she'd totally do it if I asked. That's just the way she is. The way they all are. They just want to help.

When Mitch came by the hospital yesterday, my dad said he offered him a job whenever he's ready to work. Mitch had mentioned the idea to me and I told him he should ask my dad. But I think it'd be good. The Wheelers are the best contractors in town. They follow strict safety guidelines, they give clear directions, and they care about their workers.

Jake and I haven't talked since Saturday, and I haven't seen him, but he's texted me just to check in. I told him I needed time with Liza. This has taken an emotional toll on both of us, and now that the worst is over, we just want to spend some time together. We're always so busy with our separate lives that we don't see each other as much as we'd like to, and after this ordeal, we need each other.

As for Jake and me? I'm at the point now that I just want to be done with this. I love Jake, even more so after having him there for me during such a difficult time, and I really wanted us to stay together, but I'm not going to keep waiting around for him. He's had multiple opportunities to tell me how he feels and give me an answer about our relationship, but he hasn't, and I'm done waiting. I know I told him he could have more time to think about it, but the fact that he even has to both angers and concerns me. He either wants to be with me or he doesn't. And if he's having doubts, then he should talk to me, not shut me out. If he can't be honest with me about his feelings, then I can't see a future for this relationship.

I've decided I'm going to talk to him tonight and end things. I'm already hurting inside just thinking about it, but it's what I need to do. It's not what I want, but sometimes what you want just isn't meant to be, and you have to accept that and move on.

It'll take a while for me to accept that our relationship is over but I do have to move on. I don't have a choice. I don't have time to spend crying over Jake. I have to get to work and make some money. Fast. My family was already behind on paying our bills, and now a massive hospital bill is going to be coming our way. I don't know how we're going to pay it. I'll have to move back home and give my dad my rent money, but even that won't be enough. We're going to be in serious financial trouble.

That's why I'm here today, working this shitty job that I already hate after only being here a few hours. I was so desperate for money that I called up Nick yesterday to see if that job he offered me was still available. He said it was, so I took it.

He wasn't exaggerating when he said it was in a bad part of town. This area has one of the highest homicide rates in the city. When Nick told me the address I almost changed my mind, but then I thought of all the bills coming our way and reluctantly agreed to it. At least it's during the day and it's in a church. Criminals wouldn't attack people at a church, would they? I'm pretty sure they would, but I'm trying to be positive, like Jake told me to be. There are always two outcomes, a good and a bad, and I'm choosing to think only of the good. That I'll do my job and get paid without getting hurt.