Fosters: Blackhawk (15 page)

"I did the barn fires and kids security when
they were giving Chase a hard time or sometimes I do special
assignments.  I don't spend much time with the family
otherwise."  He tells her as he buckles Jacob in.  

"You taught Mitch how to fight.  How
come?  She doesn't go anywhere without at least two guards."
 Christian asks.  

Cloud takes Jeremy and buckles him in then looks
at Christian.  "We're you looking in on Max?" Christian looks
down and says yes.  "She was taken twice by employees that
were paid to protect her.  She needs to know how to defend
herself and get herself safe.  Since then she always has two
guards and what she learns with me and Jamie is kept quiet. 
It isn't something we discuss.  You need to understand
situations before you ask a question out loud.  People can get
hurt if the wrong information is made public.  We can work on
that, but right now I'm going to ask you not to repeat or talk
about anything you picked up here tonight.  When we have a
chance to talk about it I can explain better.  Yeah?"  I
smile, that's a good way to handle it.  He was gentle and
understanding.

Christian doesn't look up but he nods. 
Cloud lifts his chin up.  "I'm sorry, it all comes in and I
can't shut it all off."  He's crying.  

Cloud lifts and hugs him walking away from the
van.  I get Brantley, Taylor and Joey settled, they tell me
about the Kids Center activities.  Cloud gets back and sits
Christian in his seat.  He fist bumps him and the boys. 
I guess we're good.  I want to ask but not in front of the
kids.  

We're home in minutes.  I love it. 
Cloud carries sleeping J's upstairs; I follow and help get them
changed.  Washing their face and hands with a facecloth they
never wake up.  Christian, Brantley and Tyler never make it up
so we check on what they're doing.  Rounding the corner to the
kitchen Cloud moves in front of me and grabs a box from Taylor.
 "Thank you guys."  I love them; they're helping bring
Cloud's things in.  Once everything is in Taylor and Brantley
head up for showers.  Christian brings Joey's machine and sets
it up in her bathroom with the book.  I take care of the
meds.  Christian stays with her while I help Cloud.  

I smile while hanging his clothes, he put them
in duffels a with the hangers.  His suits are in suit bags
though.  I can't wait to see him in a suit.  I grab the
box I packed and put his things around the room.  I hang the
picture with the kids and my pictures in the sitting room.  I
stand back and look at it, it looks nice.  "My grandmother did
that.  Thank you for putting it up.  I didn't think to
bring it here.  It's important to me so I'm glad you did."
 His arms are around me, he bends and kisses my neck.
 

"I have some blankets too; I don't remember
which ones were where.  Can you help me?"  He stops the
assault on my neck and stands straight.  Only one stays in the
bedroom.  We get the blankets put out, the last in the dining
room on the straight back chair.  "I love the colors. 
I'm glad part of you is in our rooms with us."  He put little
things in every room.  

"Everything you brought means something, how did
you know?"  He asks with a smile.  He's so friggin
handsome.  

I shrug, "I don't know, it just seemed right
when it was in my hands."  

He comes to me and kisses me setting my body on
fire.  "I'd love to spread you out on the table and feast on
your body but I don't share."  He says when I whimper at the
loss of his mouth.

My brain isn't working.  "Share?"
 

"Cameras babe, not into giving Digs a show."
 He pecks my lips.  

"Friggin cameras."  I whisper.  He
laughs pulling me to the living room.  

He hits buttons and gets the tv to move down. I
sit beside him, his arm goes around me pulling me closer.  He
gets the Discovery channel on and we get into it.  Christian
comes over and sits on the coffee table, Cloud mutes the show.
 "Did you want to talk to me Cloud?" He looks nervous.
 

Cloud sits me up and pulls Christian to his lap.
 "I already told you nothing that is happening is your
fault.  You don't have to feel bad about getting what comes
into your head.  It will drive you crazy if you don't let it
go.  We can talk about all you got today or you can sleep on
it and decide what's important enough to ask about and what you
should just keep to yourself.  I don't want you to be up all
night worrying about it.  What's going to let you sleep
tonight Christian?" 

"Do you work tomorrow?"  

"No buddy I'm here most of the day.  You
can come with me on errands in the morning, we can talk then."
 Cloud says so easy.

"Can we do that and I'll see if what I think is
right tomorrow?"  He looks so little and unsure of
himself.  He's only eleven but he acts so much older most of
the time I forget.  

"We can, I need to leave at eight forty-five."
 He hugs him kissing his head.  "Try to get some sleep
tonight.  It will all look better in the morning."  

"I will, I love you Cloud."  He gets up and
kisses my cheek.  "You too CJ."  I watch him run up the
stairs.  Looking at Cloud I see he's smiling.  He pushes
my chin up so my mouth closes.  Friggin kid.  Cloud puts
the sound back on and we watch the rest of the show.  

Climbing the stairs again we kiss the sleeping
boys’ heads and say goodnight to Joey.  In our room I flop on
the bed and he laughs.  "Rough day?" 

"Not at all, I'm getting into the new
routine.  It was a lot to take in tonight.  Do you know
why Christian is getting more now?  What changed?"  

"I asked Aleena that.  She thinks we need
to see grandmother.  She'll be able to answer our
questions.  Aleena took a guess that puberty plays a part in
it.  The other thing is the MC invading the house, danger
being so close and him not understanding the threats, then
Mo.  He may never have seen someone he loves get hurt. 
He didn't know how to change it.  Danny said Tess had a hard
time with that.  She couldn't handle seeing her new family
hurt and went into a catatonic like state.  That's when they
got help.  We won't wait for that to happen with
Christian.  Pres said he'll get the doctor back before he gets
hurt.  He's too little to deal with all he can see." He
undresses me as he's talking.  I love him taking care of
me.  He undresses himself and lies down beside me.  

"The MC is taking us and our wellbeing very
seriously.  Even the kids are trying to make it better for all
the kids.  I love that people are seeing how special they
are."  I kiss his chest.  

"It's you too CJ.  Every one of the old
ladies don't see how special they are, they just do what feels
right and don't think about it.  Mitch has been like that
since I met her.  She changed the world with her affordable
robotic limbs, computer programs and the chips that help deaf kids
hear.  She doesn't think anything of it. You all touch and
change something in all of us and you don't even recognize
it.  The men find it funny.  You fit right in with the
women that make life better.  I love you CJ with everything in
me.  I love you."  He flips me over onto my back.
 "Now for my feast."  

He does feasting really well.  I think he
licked every friggin spot on my body.  I fall back breathing
heavy, satisfied and exhausted.  I have no damn clue what
happens after that because my eyes close and don't open back
up.

Cloud

It's been a good drive to the reservation in
Connecticut.  Everyone is excited to see it.  To me it
will always be home so I'm excited to.  Opening the gate I
pull in and go back to close and lock it.  "Why'd you close it
we have to leave anyway?"  Taylor asks.  

"It is going to sound bad but white men tend to
take advantage of the open gates.  They come onto our land,
kill animals for sport, leave trash on our earth, contaminate our
water and disrespect my people with their words and
attitudes.  The land is sacred; it should be treated with
respect.  Plants and animals are living beings, they are used
for food, we don't waste what keeps us alive.  Without food
and water we die.  You can't eat or drink money."

Pulling to grandmother’s land I open and close
the gate again.  The kids are quiet looking around.  I
bark out a laugh.  Fuckin Nunánuk.  The kids are
laughing and yelling.  She put the tepee in front of the
house.  I stop and walk around to CJ's door.  I bend to
her ear.  “She's fuckin with the kids.”  She laughs; we
follow Joey into the tepee.  

Nunánuk is in her fancy regalia weaving a
basket and talking to the kids in broken English.  CJ is
smiling the whole time.  She walks right up and kisses
grandmothers cheek with a chuckle earning her a wink.  We sit
on the floor and watch her teach the kids how to weave a basket
while she learns their names.  

"Did Cloud weave baskets when he was a boy?"
 Jacob asks her.  

I laugh.  "Nah, he was always with the men
playing on them fool planes."  She says in perfect
English.  Christian laughs falling over.  CJ just watches
as the other kids get it.  

"You don't really live here do you?"
 Taylor asks.

She shakes her head no, "Too freakin cold at
night for that.  I sleep in the house with my heat and iPad."
 

CJ is laughing hysterically.  I pull her
up, "let's go see the house, it has a beautiful view from the
back."  I bend kissing Nunánuk and help her in while
holding CJ's hand.  The kids are running through the field on
the side of the drive, wild flowers dance in their wake. 

"It's beautiful."  CJ says looking at the
log cabin.  

"Cloud built it with his friends one
summer.  They got the outside done then were called
away.  I was shocked when they came back three weeks later and
finished it.  Wait til you see the view." She moves a little
faster.  

"Slow down grandmother.  We have the whole
day."  I tell her trying to stop her from falling.  

"Aleena has a big mouth, I only fell because I
dint want to step on the snake and it was just a sprain.  I
didn't break anything.  That girl worries too much."  I
look at CJ, she thinks this is cute.  Fuckin women.
 "Come, sit."  She says pointing to the table.
 "Cloud get the kids some drinks, I got juice for them."
 

I wait for her to get to her chair and hug her;
before I straighten I kiss her cheek.  "I love you
Nunánuk.  It's good to see you."  

As I'm getting drinks Christian comes in, "what
is Nunánuk?"

I smile at him, "grandmother, she's my mother's
mother.  It is the word that means that to my people."
 He nods and goes back.  He reminds me of Pres always
wanting to know the little things.

I bring a cup of water to grandmother and
CJ.  The kids take their drinks asking questions about the
reservation.  "Go out the back door and see.  We are high
enough that you can see most of it."  They do, CJ surprises me
and stays while the kids go out, she always wants to know
everything.  "You worry for him.  It will not change the
outcome but he feels your love through it.  He keeps it around
him like a blanket."

"Nunánuk he can see everyone, he started hearing
more when trouble came to their door.  What changed for him to
pick up more now?"

She smiles with amusement.  "You Cloud, the
man he heard was threatening the ones he loved.  You shielded
him with peace in that time.  He is safe with you, he knows
it.  When he no longer had to be the protector he became the
seer."

I wipe my hand down my face.  "Is there a
way to stop it?"  

She laughs, "You can no more stop what is meant
to be than stopping the wind.  It is how it will be.  He
was meant to be the seer he will become Cloud.  You both are
his shield.  There are many more, they will protect all of
you."

"Is there anything we can do to help him, he's
hurting and he doesn't understand.  He can't keep going like
this."  CJ says softly.

"His warriors will teach him.  Every
challenge will be a test, as he learns to overcome them; he will
become stronger making him who he is to be.  Go to the
children in the fields, he waits to come to me.  I have words
to pass to him.  He is impatient to hear them." 

"Yes Nunánuk."  I stand and take CJ's hand.
 "It's a beautiful view.  You can feel the ancestors in
the wind."  

As soon as we hit the door she sucks in a
breath.  "Breathe CJ; breathtaking doesn't have to be
literal."  

She laughs, "It is so beautiful, look at the
kids.  You can't see Joey's chair, Jeremy is running looking
free, nothing is holding him down.  Do you think they feel it
too?" 

I look; they are beautiful kids looking free
from their troubles.  I walk her down the path to them. 
I let the wind touch me taking it in.  "I always feel it; it
looks like they're feeling it too.  It's a peace, here we're
not alone.  We have our wiser ancestors guiding us to harmony
with our land and sky."  I look back and see Christian going
into the house.  Grandmother is very wise.  I smile glad
I came.  Maybe Christian will gain some peace from her.

We sit by Joey in the long grass dotted with
wild flowers.  I point out different places and my friends’
houses.  "How come you lived here and not with the other
people?"  Brantley asks.

He doesn't miss much.  "Grandmother is a
shaman she sees and hears our ancestors and descendants. 
Sometimes the tribe is too loud for her to see what she
needs.  This land gives her the ability to watch over her
people without hearing their babies screaming in the
background." 

CJ laughs.  I show them the hangar that I
practically lived at.  "Your grandmother could see what you
were up to wherever you went."  CJ says with a smile.

She's so beautiful with the sun on her face I
lean in and kiss her.  "She knew when I was up to no
good.  It didn't stop me from having fun but there were
consequences.  I had to decide if it was worth the punishment
before I did anything."  I say with a laugh.