FOREWORD (66 page)

Next, one of the ladies says that she did not like my kissing, so I shall be punished. I’m lead to an inverted U-rod, over which I’m pushed, so that my face is facing the ground and the erect U-rod is under or around my cock, and my ass is protruding up. My feet are tied to the ends of the rod, and my face is pushed toward a small velvet-cushioned stool, and my hands are tied around it, and handcuffed, and now the Men In Love

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lady who wants to punish me sits on a chair in front of me and places her feet on the cushioned stool. Then one of the ladies gets a cane and the other a whip, while another brings two foot screws and puts both my feet in foot screws. Then they start on me. I start kissing and licking the feet of the offended lady. They ask me to beg her pardon, so I start by saying, “Please madam, have mercy on your slave, forgive him.” All the time, I’m being whipped, caned on the buttocks, and foot screws are tightened. I am aching all over, and it’s an hour before they let me walk around, but again as a dog, and with a leash. I have already jerked off twice.

During lunch they make polite conversation with each other, and I trot around licking their feet, and eating the crumbs they throw for me. Next, after they have finished, they think of my lunch. They proceed to bring a bowl which is filled with sweetened milk, which is placed in front of me. Then one of the ladies places both her feet in the bowl, so that they are partially immersed. They then tell me to lap it up. I start, and keep licking the lady’s feet and with it I keep drinking the milk, till I lick dry.

In the evening they tie me up to a cross, and make love to me, i.e., they satisfy themselves with my cock. After this, they go for a walk and again when they come back, they say they have dirtied their feet, so I’ll have to give their feet a wash. So they lead me on a leash to the bathroom, where they sit on a comfy chair, and I am again thoroughly restrained, so that my hands can move about, and my mouth. So I start with soaping their feet and caressing them, and lovingly cleansing them, and all the time, I keep kissing and licking them, and I especially caress their soles with my face. After cleansing, I wipe them lovingly with a towel and then give them a massage, and sprinkle powder.

Another thing they all love to do is to tie me up in a kneeling position, my hands behind my back, with thumb screws and foot screws, and they sit on a chair in front and make me go down on them, and they keep increasing the torture till they get an orgasm. Many times one of them keeps Nancy Friday

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sucking me off. This is how it continues for a week or two, and after that, when I am thoroughly used to being a dog, and their slave, I’m suddenly picked up by the same person and dropped off at my house, all dressed up as I was. On reaching home, I find a package which I open and find consists of movie reels. I put them in the projector, and find that all my enslavement has been captured in them. Next day I get a letter telling me to keep quiet or –. And so the affair continues.

Fantasy Number Two:
I am a Roman lord and have my own soldiers and palace. Everyday I get a new slave girl for my entertainment. This girl is a wild sort of a thing, and very arrogant. My soldiers drag her by chains and bring her to me.

I order them to take her to my chambers. She is now tied to the wall with chains, her hands raised above her head, so that only her toes graze the floor. Now she looks scared. I then slowly start undressing her. First I remove her garments, then her underclothes. She gasps and goes red in the face. Then I move on to her shoes. I remove one shoe and then gently caress her foot. It is beautiful, with a soft pink sole, and small dainty toes. I start kissing and licking it and she just moans. I do the same with her other foot. Now she is standing stark naked with her whole weight resting on her toes. I look at her pussy. It is beautiful, with soft curly hair, but I don’t like the hair, so I start shaving it. She starts crying and begs me to let her go, but I don’t listen to her. I then expose her cunt to its full glory. It’s pink and pulsating very excitingly. I then go down to her and lick and kiss it, and probe it deep with my tongue. She starts squirming and tries very hard not to show her own excitement, but then loses all control and has a wild orgasm.

Next, I have her spread-eagled on a table, similar to an operating table. All the time, the girl keeps begging me to !et her go, but I don’t listen to her. After I have licked her hands and ankles, I start licking and kissing her feet. Then shackles make them look all the more small and lovely. After I am satisfied with the kissing, I slowly mount her. Now she is Men In Love

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really scared, and starts screaming, but I don’t stop, and my manhood is erect and throbbing. I slowly enter her and she screams again. Then I start working over her and she starts enjoying it too, and wants to join in by pulling at the chains, but there is no release for her. After that, we turn her around and she is made to mount me, and at the same time, one of my men takes her in the asshole and another asks her to suck.

We all jerk off on her and then leave her tied in chains. At night I give her her freedom, but first I give her a beautiful bath-soap her clean and kiss and lick her feet in the bath till they are pink and tingling. Then I take her to bed and caress her feet and make love to her and give her all the pleasure I can. Then she is set free and sent back to her slave den. The next day starts similar to the preceding one. I take a new girl.

ROD

I am white, twenty-eight, and live largely for my work.

This is due in part to the fact that I am very shy, and therefore rather solitary in relation to other people, especially women. I feel sadness knowing how unlikely it is that I will ever find emotional and sexual fulfillment. It is so “chancy” a thing to find someone with whom you are genuinely and wholly compatible. We just dare not go around baring our innermost secrets to strangers. Even with acquaintances, it is terribly risky to disclose oneself. Here are some of my fantasies.

The woman or women – one at a time, usually – in my

“dreams” are actual people I’ve known, at least on sight, sometimes quite well. There is usually a very clear division between who is dominant and who is submissive. When I am dominant, the woman does what I tell her, although she is very willing to submit. She is naked, except that she is wearing one of those black bands that women sometimes do, around her neck, and nylons, but no garters. Her sex is always smooth shaven, as this is something I love in women.

She lays down on a platform or bed with posts, and I tie her Nancy Friday

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so that her arms are outstretched above her, and her legs are drawn up against her body, slightly outspread, tied so that her legs cannot move. I then say to her – and this is important in setting the tone for this fantasy – that she is most completely feminine now, her beautiful, naked sex totally open and available, her voluntary submission to whatever I might desire, the most arousing of all things she could do. I then tell her that I am going to whip her on the mound of her sex, with a very light whip, that will not mark or injure her in any way.

(The thought of mutilation or injury disgusts me.) In this, too, I tell her, she is most essentially feminine, her moans and cries, like the moans and cries of passion, serving both as a token of her submission to me, and as a mode of arousal for my passion. Then I whip her, slowly and rather ceremoniously, gazing alternately from her sex where the whip rises and falls, to her beautiful face, eyes closed, head moving slowly from left to right, and back again, her mouth emitting soft groans that occasionally suggest a greater intensity. Usually, if I just follow through with this part of the fantasy, dwelling on it, I will come. Sometimes it goes further with my fucking and sucking her. The curious thing in all this, I suppose, is that I am always very tender, telling her how much she arouses me, and never injuring or bruising her beautiful flesh.

In fantasies where the woman is dominant, she is above me, moving her smooth sex over my mouth, rhythmically, back and forth, dwelling in pleasure, giving me her taste and scent. (This is a position in which I would dearly love to lick a women.) Sometimes she fucks me – anyway, I do whatever she likes. That is the important thing. The turn-on for me is her unhesitating, straightforward expression of her desires, and her enjoyment of her pleasure.

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GERARD

I am a thirty-year-old white, divorced male and a psychotherapist.

My turn-on is spanking. Mostly to be spanked but occasionally to be the spanker. The fantasy has a thousand variations but the common theme is that I am bending over someone or something with my ass bare and my feet off the ground. I am helpless and vulnerable. The fantasy is always with a woman. She is not brutal or angry although she may tease me. I’ve been naughty and getting what I deserve. I always agree with the punishment. The ritual (in whatever form it takes) is very important, the bending over, or tying me up, especially. All that is really loving and caring. In fact that is the whole theme. When she begins, with a switch of her hand, she starts gently and slowly. It makes me want more. Eventually she builds up and it hurts. It’s like a climax.

The physical contact is an act of love. It reflects (literally) the caring and affection.

These fantasies are masturbatory. I have them also when I am making love and really want to act them out. Occasionally I have with different lovers and some of these experiences have been exciting. I am very risky. I know that some woman have their own fantasies that are similar to mine. That is when my needs are met in the best way.

Despite my relative ease in writing this and the fact that when I have been in therapy I have shared these fantasies with groups and even acted them out, I cannot get over feeling deeply ashamed about my fantasy.

Our society says that it’s not okay for a man to be submissive and helpless. We’re supposed to be tough and domineering. I can do that; it would be easy to project that image in the community where I live and work. But I don’t want to. The men who are my friends are struggling with new definitions and roles for ourselves. We want to be soft, gentle, and tender, caring, authentic and whole. I certainly do.

Perhaps one day it will be more acceptable to feel that my Nancy Friday

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fantasies as a man are okay and that coming across as a wrestler in bed is not what men and women want or need all the time. Getting there (feeling that it’s okay) is my personal work to do.

NIGEL

My fantasies revolve around being sexually dominated by women or groups of women. My fantasies rarely include actual violence and pain – whenever they do I usually substitute another man into the fantasies – but rather emphasize humiliation, obedience, and dedication in providing women with sexual satisfaction. Here are two of my favorite fantasies:

1. I am the sexual “slave” of a well-built, and good-looking, but tough young girl (say about twenty-six or twenty-seven) who is a secretary or a nurse. We have known each other for several years, and although our relationship began more normally, it has evolved to where she controls all our sexual activity. I come to her apartment and live there with her for extended periods whenever she wishes. Our sexual activity boils down to my satisfying her through cunnilingus and analingus, primarily. Initially she would masturbate me, but then she trained me to perform autofellatio by lying on my back and jack-knifing my legs over my head. She also mastered the technique of fingering my ass and making me come by massaging my prostrate glands. In fact, the rules are that when I perform autofellatio I’m not allowed to come until she initiates it via my prostate.

Since I obey all her commands, I do not hesitate one day when she decides to demonstrate our unique sexual practices to her girl friend. This girl enjoys this performance so much, and becomes so stimulated that I am required to satisfy her orally and she convinces my girl to put on regular shows for groups of women. One thing leads to another and before long I’m putting on weekly, and then even more frequent shows in Men In Love

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my girl’s apartment, for groups of four to five women (some of whom are single “career” women, college students, or horny married women’s libbers). The demand is so great (all by word of mouth) that my girl is soon earning lots of money by charging admission at twenty dollars a head. The show consists of four acts: (1) After all the audience has arrived and has become acquainted, I must strip down nude, masturbate to an erection, and let each person inspect me any way she wants. (2) I perform autofellatio on the floor, with my girl finally letting me come by massaging my prostate, and then I must let the semen dribble out the sides of my mouth. (3) I perform cunnilingus and analingus on all the girls present – but this is done in a special way: Each girl was previously told to come to the “party” wearing a long full skirt, with nothing underneath. This way I can satisfy them with my head buried underneath their skirts, while everyone remains in the room, watching and talking while I satisfy each girl in turn. (4) In the final act, each spectator gets to choose an unusual act for me to perform, such as screwing me anally with a vibrator or dildo, my pissing in a bottle, or urinating on myself in the bathroom, my receiving an enema, etc. A favorite request in this portion of the show is for a repeat of analingus as many of the girls have not experienced this before, and find the act very stimulating. There are many demands for me to be “rented out” but my girl has not yet agreed to this (it’s not up to me); although this is “hanging over my head” and some of the things the women want me to do are extremely humiliating (but yet exciting to me).

2. I fantasize that I am the sexual slave of another woman (this one is usually a little older than the one in fantasy number one). I am usually married to this woman, am the wage earner, but perform all household chores as well. At home I am always kept in the nude or dressed in some humiliating costume with my genitals showing. I am required to parade around this way even when she has guests over, even when I am serving a dinner party to mixed company.