Finding Her Way (5 page)

Read Finding Her Way Online

Authors: Riley Jefferson

Tags: #Gay & Lesbian, #Contemporary, #Fiction, #Romance, #Genre Fiction, #Lesbian, #Lesbian Romance, #Literature & Fiction

BOOK: Finding Her Way
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Jerrica’s face reddened when Devin caught her glancing at the open seam.

Let’s see how far I can take this before I get what I want, Devin conspired.

“Are you playing some kind of game with me, Jerrica? I brought you up here to talk and you’ve barely said anything to me. Furthermore, when you do bother to say anything it’s on the edge of being rude. I don’t need this from you and frankly don’t feel I’ve done anything to deserve that treatment.” Devin voice was cold, easily baiting her prey.

Devin knew Jerrica would never walk away from a direct challenge. Devin slowly picked up her glass and just waited for Jerrica to respond. She watched the anger develop quickly in Jerrica’s eyes. She knew she had pushed enough to make Jerrica erupt.

Jerrica stood quickly knocking her chair to the floor. Slamming both hands on the table, she began to speak. Her voice started low then amplified to almost a shout.

“Damn you, Devin! I didn’t ask to come here, you asked me. You said you wanted to talk, so talk! You think I’m being rude. Have you conveniently forgotten everything that has gone on between us? You walked away from me, not the other way around. You broke my heart! After months with no communication you suddenly come out of nowhere. I guess I’m supposed to fall over you with gratitude because you say you miss me? You selfish son of a—”

Devin was up on her feet before Jerrica could finish her sentence, stepping around the table in one fluid motion, encircling Jerrica in a full embrace.

Jerrica didn’t have time to react or think clearly, when Devin lowered her head, covering her lips with her own.

She felt Jerrica resist but only tightened her hold.


I can’t do this. This woman has caused me so much hurt,
Jerrica’s thoughts bombarded her. Jerrica’s body overrode her sensibility, giving in to the heat that was growing deep inside her, molding her body to Devin. Every nerve in her body was coming alive and she hated herself.

Devin nibbled on Jerrica’s bottom lip requesting entry.

In another moment of weakness, Jerrica opened her mouth surrendering to the deeper kiss. Both tongues danced a familiar dance. Jerrica arms reached up to the back of Devin’s neck, intertwining her fingers in her soft, long hair. She relaxed, letting Devin control the moment, her mind no longer her own.

Devin slid her hands underneath the back of Jerrica’s shirt
.
Damn she was so soft and so beautiful. She heard a soft moan as her warm hands caressed the smooth skin of Jerrica’s back. The soft sound of this woman was fueling her desire. Devin broke the kiss, hastily placing kisses down Jerrica’s exposed neck.

Jerrica’s eyes closed lazily. She was lost in euphoria from the heat that was raging through her veins. She hadn’t felt another woman’s touch in so long. She tipped her head back giving Devin more access to her exposed flesh. The passion, long denied, spread like a wildfire from deep inside, heating her skin instantly.

Jerrica’s tough exterior had cracked as Devin continued a trail toward the sensitive spot near her ear.

Devin, as if letting her ego get the best of her, gloated about her conquest. In a low sexy, raspy voice Devin reveled in her triumph. “I knew you couldn’t resist me. You never could.”

As quickly as the heat had begun for Jerrica, it vanished by the certainty of Devin’s words. Reality shook her to the core. Jerrica roughly pushed Devin away. Glaring into Devin’s face with hurt in her eyes and resentment in her voice, she yelled, “You bitch!”

She shoved Devin out of the way, rushing for the front door. She felt Devin grab her arm before she was out of reach.

“Jerrica, wait! I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for that to happen.” Devin said. “I mean, yes, I want you, but that’s not why I brought you here.”

Jerrica wrenched her arm out of Devin’s hold and stormed toward the door.

Devin did not follow her. She had already made a mess of things and following Jerrica would only make it worse.

Jerrica snatched her coat from the hanger with one hand and swung the front door open with the other.

She paused and shouted into the apartment. “You are a cruel person, Devin Daniel! You’re a cruel, evil person!”

Slamming the door shut, she left.

Jerrica hurried to the elevator, pushing the down button furiously. She kept looking over her shoulder hoping that Devin would not come out after her. Her heart was pounding so hard, it was difficult to breath. Once out of the building, she felt the cool air blanket her skin, reminding her that she was holding, not wearing her coat. Sliding the jacket on, Jerrica glanced around the street hoping to catch a cab back to the train station. Her watch informed her that she had missed her train. The next one was an hour away.

I should have stayed home after all, she silently told herself.

“Ms. Kerrison?” A soft voice spoke behind her.

Turning around abruptly, Jerrica sighed. “Peter…you startled me.”

“I’m real sorry, Ms. Kerrison, that wasn’t my intention. Ms. Daniel asked me to take you home. Are you ok? You look shaken.”

“I’m fine, Peter. You don’t have to take me home,” she paused to collect her thoughts. “Relay to Ms. Daniel that I am more than capable of finding my own way home.”

“Please, Ms. Kerrison. If I don’t get you home safely, Ms. Daniel will be very unhappy with me and when she’s not happy… you know how she can be,” he said, looking at his shuffling feet.

Yes, she knew how Devin could be. “Fine, I’ll let you drive me home.” Her voice sounded defeated.

“Please, this way.”

Peter put out an arm for Jerrica to take as they both walked toward the car.

Peter was a good person, very polite, probably in his early fifties.
How did he ever end up working for Devin
?

Peter got Jerrica seated in the back and then settled himself behind the wheel. “Would you like the scenic route or the highway?” he asked.

“I don’t want to keep you out too late, Peter, so you can go the highway.”

“Don’t worry about me. The wife is working a party for the elder Mr. and Mrs. Daniel so she won’t be home until much later. I have the evening to myself,” he said with a smile.

Jerrica smiled back at him in the rearview mirror. “I’ll tell you what. You take whatever route you want. I know you wouldn’t steer me wrong because I know your wife.”

“My Molly would kill me if I didn’t take care of her favorite Nantucket guest,” he answered with a hearty laugh.

Jerrica liked his wife Molly. Every time they had gone to the Nantucket house, Molly always made sure Devin and Jerrica had everything they needed but kept her distance giving them privacy. Every employee knew the secret happenings at that house, but no one ever talked about it.

Devin has plenty of skeletons in her closet. I was one of those skeletons. If that house could talk, it would be scandalous, she thought and couldn’t help but smile at the idea.

“It looks like it’s going to be a clear night. I feel like a long ride this evening,” Peter glanced at her in the rearview mirror.

“I’m in the car, you lead the way,” she answered, leaning back into the seat.

Peter clicked the radio on to an oldies station and turned the volume up. Glancing in the mirror, Jerrica just smiled and knew it was going to be a relaxing trip. They drove out of Boston toward Lynn.

She knew exactly the route he was taking. When she was hired at MHD, Jerrica had made multiple trips around the area to find different routes to get into and out of the city. She sometimes would take this same route when she drove into work. Moving to the passenger’s side of the back seat, she opened the window. The moon was full and the breeze coming in the window was a little chilly but she did not mind it brushing her face. She could smell the ocean when the vehicle crossed the bridge from Salem to Beverly. Beverly Harbor was so beautiful at night. The moonbeams dazzled on the few breaks in the water.

The breeze started getting cold, so Jerrica closed the window. She knew they were about halfway through the trip. Sitting back against the seat, Jerrica tried to relax from the totally wasting day. Trying to clear her head, Jerrica briefly closed her eyes.

“Ms. Kerrison,” she heard a voice say.

 
Opening her eyes, Jerrica saw Peter standing just outside the open door.

“Ms. Kerrison, you’re home.”

“Thank you. For everything,” she said touching his arm lightly as he helped her out. “Please be careful going back home.”

“Ms. Kerrison, will I be seeing you with Ms. Daniel anytime soon?”

Hearing the concern in his voice, she responded as honestly as she could. “I hope not, Peter. I really hope not.”

Jerrica waved as he drove away. She was ready to go to bed and forget today ever happened. Her body had betrayed her today and still ached to be touched. Two sleeping pills and hopefully she would forget all about this evening.

Unlocking her front door, feeling lonely, she yelled jokingly. “Honey, I’m home!” She knew no one would answer.

Chapter Three

 

The next morning Jerrica was startled awake as the lamp on her nightstand crashed to the floor. Turning, she was just in time to see the youngest kitty jump off the nightstand to investigate her prize on the floor.

Jerrica swung her legs over the side of the bed, stretching out her arms. Reaching down to pick the light up, she glanced at the alarm clock. It was five forty five
.

Shit! I’m late for the train!

Tossing the blankets off, she leapt toward the bathroom. Abruptly stopping, she remembered she was taking her car today and not the train. Through the morning mental fog, she started making a mental list of what she needed to do to get ready. Shower, dress, do hair, makeup, pack for the weekend, call Mary next door to babysit the cats, feed the cats, and pack the car. Yes, that seemed organized enough to get her morning on track. Once she was happy with the list, she went about completing each task in order. She mentally checked off each item on her list as it was completed.

Working on the last chore, Jerrica fetched her packed suitcase from where she had deposited it earlier near the front door. Keys in one hand, suitcase in the other, she entered the garage. Popping the trunk she carefully placed the suitcase inside. She paused suddenly, feeling the dread that something seemed missing. Thinking through the list, she strolled back into her house. She retrieved the long coat she had chosen for the cold Cape Cod weather from the closet.

“Well kids, have a lazy weekend without me. Be good to Mary or she won’t feed you,” she teased as she lightly kissed each cat on the head as they ate breakfast.

Hand on the doorknob, she reached for her briefcase that was usually kept next to the staircase. Then realization hit her. “I forgot my briefcase!” Jerrica’s voice was elevated in panic. “Where the hell did I leave it,” she cried, quickly looking around the room.

Damn it all, she’d left it at Devin’s apartment! How in the hell was she going to get it back without causing problems for herself? She didn’t have time for this. She was going to be late.

Sitting in the car, Jerrica pushed the garage door button, remembering that her cell phone was also in her briefcase.

“Well, when I screw things up, I really screw things up,” Jerrica said while turning the ignition.
 

The brand new silver BMW coupe convertible purred smoothly as if it was welcoming her home again. She looked at her well-used Land Rover sitting in the other parking space. “Don’t worry, my friend, I’ll take you out soon,” she told it.

She should be taking the Land Rover to work but it had been so mild the past couple of days, she wanted to spoil herself. Backing out of the garage, slowly onto the street, she slid on her sunglasses. Shifting the car into first gear she punched the gas. She loved the power in this car. It was a gift to herself after the divorce became final.

She decided she would take the highway this morning. She knew traffic might get heavier the closer she got to work but there were always a few empty stretches where she could feed her need for speed. The nickname her father had given her was lead foot. Once off the exit and onto the interstate, Jerrica quickly wove through traffic. She made the decision to take interstate 93, which would be a longer commute but would be much more fun with its flat roadways. She needed to feel the rush of adrenaline that driving fast would give her. She wove in and out of lanes to find an open section of road. Her patience paid off as she came upon a section of highway that was clear for at least a mile with no on merging exists. Her pulse quickened. “Let do this,” she said, pushing hard on the gas pedal.

The speed limit was sixty-five in this area but Jerrica knew she could hit at least seventy-five and the authorities might not pull her over. She was willing to take that chance today. The exhilaration grew as the speedometer increased. Switching gears again, Jerrica pushed the gas pedal to the floor. Two hands on the wheel, adrenaline rushing in her veins and concentrating on the road, for a few moments she felt free. All of her problems took a back seat to the powerful feeling of the BMW. Easing up on the pedal, she noticed that traffic was slowing down in front of her. The bumper-to-bumper traffic was beginning as she drew closer to the city.

Approximately forty minutes later, Jerrica pulled into her reserved parking spot in the North End Parking Garage. Even though she took the train most days, she kept her reserved parking space for days like this when she wanted her vehicle nearby. The monthly fee didn’t cost that much and she knew she could safely leave it here for the weekend. She would bring her suitcase into work hoping that Lauren wouldn’t notice that she didn’t have the briefcase. She had left her laptop on her desk so she could at least contact Devin discreetly about getting the case back.

Jerrica looked at the sky. Another mild day, the walk to work shouldn’t be bad. Jerrica popped the trunk and grabbed her suitcase, realizing immediately that it hadn’t seemed so heavy at home when she’d loaded it into the car.

“Ok…so this walk might suck after all,” she said, laughing.

Stepping off the elevator, Jerrica was a mess. Not only had she walked from the parking garage to work in high heels, rolling a heavy suitcase, but also to make matters worse, the moment she stepped out of the garage the wind was hitting her in the face. Jerrica scanned the department to see if Lauren had seen her yet. The first pair of eyes that caught her attention belonged to Jaime. Within seconds Jaime was in front of her grabbing the suitcase.

“Are you all right? You look terrible.”

“Yes, Jaime, I am fine. Thank you for the compliment. Could you please put that into my office along with my coat? I’m going to the ladies room to freshen up,” she said, running her fingers through her hair. “Where is Lauren?”

“She’s in the lounge preparing coffee. Do you want me to get her?”

“No that’s fine. Just put that in my office and I’ll be out in a couple minutes,” she assured her, turning toward the women’s room.

She looked over her shoulder to see Jaime rushing to her office. She smiled at the thought that maybe she wouldn’t have to hear Lauren’s lecture about the missing briefcase. Once in the restroom, Jerrica took a good look at her reflection in the mirror. Her hair was tangled in the back and standing up in the front.

“Wow, I look like shit!” she said aloud pulling her fingers through the mess.

The sound of a toilet flushing behind her made Jerrica realized she wasn’t alone. Still working on fixing her hair, Jerrica tried, unsuccessfully, not to glance at the reflection of the farthest stall door opening. An unfamiliar woman stepped out, strolling to the sink next to Jerrica. Jerrica felt embarrassed by her outburst and tried not to make eye contact. Stealing short glimpses at the reflection of the mysterious woman in the mirror, Jerrica could tell they were of the same height, but the other woman’s build was more muscular. Her hair was naturally black and wavy, just above shoulder length. The more Jerrica tried not to watch, the more frustrated she became trying to fix her hair.

After washing and drying her hands, the woman started searching in her pocket for something.

Jerrica found it hard not to stare. Even though she wanted to be alone to clean up, Jerrica couldn’t concentrate on her task while being captivated by every move this other person made.

The women turned to leave, unexpectedly pausing behind Jerrica. Leaning around her, she brushed up against Jerrica’s arm and set something on the sink.

Jerrica froze at the feeling of this woman’s soft skin against her arm. Jerrica closed her eyes, breathing in the intoxicating perfume that now surrounded her. Her legs felt like jelly, so she leaned into the counter for support. When she opened her eyes, the woman was standing by the door gazing at her. With the door opened, she commented. “No. You definitely do not look like shit.”

With a smile on her face, she vanished into the corridor.

That was the strangest encounter I have ever had,
Jerrica mused. Standing with both hands in her hair Jerrica glanced down to see what was on the counter. Picking up the ponytail tie, Jerrica chuckled.

Walking across the department with her new hairdo for the day, Jerrica stopped at Lauren’s desk.

Lauren lifted an eyebrow. “Is it summertime already?”

“My hair and the Boston wind had a fight this morning. The wind won. Do I have coffee in my office?”

Lauren squinted her eyes in a mock annoyance, “Yes, your majesty. It’s sitting on your newly polished throne.”

Jerrica turned abruptly just to make her ponytail swoosh back and forth.

“Smartass,” Jerrica commented as the door shut.
 

Leaning her back against the door, she sighed in relief. She had made it to the safety of her office. She rushed to her desk. The laptop only took seconds to load, quickly clicking the mouse to get into e-mail. Scanning the inbox, she didn’t see anything from Devin. Should she e-mail her or call? Jerrica decided that e-mail would be safer. Opening a blank form, she began composing a letter when her intercom buzzed.

“Ms. Kerrison, there’s a courier here with a package for you,” Jaime’s voice whispered from the speaker.

“Could you please sign for it and bring it in?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t. The package has to be signed for by you only.”

“Send him in,” Jerrica said with frustration, completely losing her train of thought.

A scrawny young man entered the office with a large box in his hands. He placed the box on the desk.

“That’s fine right there.”

“Please sign here.”

She signed the clipboard and handed it back. “Who sent this package?”

The deliveryman stopped just as he put his hand on the doorknob, “I’m not sure, Miss. A door attendant gave it to me and gave me instructions to deliver it directly to you. I was paid a lot of money to make sure you received it early this morning.”

She thanked him as he exited her office. She grabbed the letter opener off her desk, slicing open the tape on the top of the box. Inside, wrapped in pretty tissue paper, was her briefcase with a letter sitting on top. Jerrica grabbed the letter and slid it under her computer. Pulling the case from the box, she moved the carton to the floor beside her desk. Jerrica touched the soft leather on the top of the case. Clicking the latches on the side, she opened it. With considerable shock, Jerrica reached in and picked up the new smart phone that was sitting on top of her files. She flipped it around in her hand to get a detailed look at it. She carefully placed the phone on her desk, then drew her attention to the contents of her briefcase. Satisfied that everything was still there, she placed the case on the floor. Bringing her attention back to the phone, she moved it to the middle of her desk.

“I have to send this back,” she mumbled.

When in the hell did she have time, between last night and this morning to get this phone?

“Wait…where’s my other cell phone,” she questioned aloud.

Not finding her other cell phone under the files, she grew annoyed.
Damn you, Devin, what kind of game are you playing now.
Jerrica picked up the new phone, placing it in the top drawer of the desk. At that moment she was not curious enough to turn it on. Not wanting to deal with this current mess, she decided to focus her attention on work.

In her non-caring style, Lauren knocked while entering the office. Leaving the door open behind her, Lauren moved quickly to the front of Jerrica’s desk. “So, what was in the box?” Lauren inquired leaning on the desk.

“I don’t really want to talk about it right now.”

Lauren obviously could see the frustration in her eyes, so she instantly called off the drill of multiple questions.

“Lauren, trust me. When I’m ready to talk about it, I’ll come to you first.”

Lauren sensed it was time to leave. Showing an understanding smile, she left.

Jerrica put her head in her hands in defeat.

“Ms. Kerrison.” The quiet voice emanated from the speaker phone.

“Yes, Jaime,” Jerrica sighed softly.

“Mr. Bisset is out here and he would like to see you.”

“Well, send him in.”

“Umm…he would like you to come out here. He has guests.”

“I’ll be right out, ” she said, cursing under her breath.

This isn’t going to be my day, she thought.

She lightly tapped her forehead on her desk in aggravation. Jerrica sighed heavily, then headed out of her office. Once out in the main floor she noticed John standing near Jaime’s desk.

He turned to see Jerrica approaching, instinctively holding out a hand to her. “Well, the board accepted my proposal, Jak,” he said, shaking her hand roughly.

Jerrica felt uncomfortable, as her hand became a hostage of his sweaty grip. “John, that’s great. I’m glad I could help,” she replied, yanking out of his grasp.

Jerrica figured she might as well give herself some credit for helping, since he obviously wasn’t going to acknowledge her input.

“Jerrica,” John said motioning to someone behind her. “This is Olivia Hutten. She will be joining my PR department. She’s the big mystery!”

Boy, John moved fast when he wanted something. Jerrica shifted her position to find a tall, eye-catching middle-aged woman standing a few feet behind her. The woman moved forward in her direction, putting her hand out to introduce herself. Jerrica extended her hand out again, for another greeting.

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